Saturday, September 20, 2025

I Fake Showers Now

You remember I admitted feeling shame in taking showers every day because My Fucking Father told me to?  Well, fuck that, and I am going to not do it by faking taking a shower.

I started by recognizing that even though I am expected to take a shower every day, I don't have to take a long one, like I usually do.  So, about a few weeks back, I began taking shorter showers -- for real, but sometimes I would only soap up my armpits, genitals and feet (this expert recommends it, for one), and since I only rinsed the rest of my body, I save time that way.  Sometimes I don't wash my hair, and that save a lot of time, too.  And then I decided to cut my wash time even shorter by taking a quick bath -- just soak my feet, then get a washcloth to clean my face, pits, groin and tushy.

Then I realized: Hey, if My Fucking Parents think that I now take quick showers and baths and let me get away with it, why get wet at all?  So I have begun to do what I did last/Friday night: Go into the bathroom, turn on the shower ... and just sit on the toilet and scroll through my phone. Sure, I jostle the shower curtain to splash the water everywhere inside the shower.  I also put the soap dish underneath the shower so that it looks like I used the bar of soap.  But after a few minutes of turning the water on, then turning off the water and waiting a few more minutes (perfect time to just doomscroll), I take off my clothes, wrap the towel around my body, and walk out.  Of course, this won't work if my hair is completely dry and one of my parents is just outside and catches me leaving the bathroom.  Conversely, if neither of them catches me doing this, why go through the theater of leaving the bathroom with just a towel?  Hey, I'll cross that bridge if I get there.  All I know is that, so far, they've gotten off my back with the showering every day bullshit because they think I do.  How little they know!

No comments:

Post a Comment