Have I Passed Up A Massage For Good?

So out of the blue, ******a, my ATF from My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Edition), asks if I'm free tonight/Monday night.  I have been angling for a massage session since the New Year, and she kept putting it off, and frankly, I was wondering if it was ever going to happen.

She had said that she was shooting for the end of the month, so it was kind of surprising that she turned around and texts me if I were free tonight.  To be fair, she has not said specifically she was offering me a massage.  She could be offering to do something else.  I thought, because I saw her at a Lynx Game once, that she had a ticket to a WNBA Draft party at Target Center or something.  I have plans tonight, and ironically, it's watching the WNBA Draft, mostly because I wonder how it's going to shake out (I've seen four players projected to go #1) and the Lynx need to hit on #2 because they have lost almost half their squad, including starters Bridget Carleton and Alanna Smith.  But hell yeah I would ditch them if she only had time tonight to rub me down.  I tell her this, and she asks me to go on with my plans.  She might be free Friday or next Monday night.

I like that she's chill with what I've got going on.  Then again, I'm scared that I missed my chance of getting touched by her.  This is like the time I passed up on fucking ****e* because I was scared of sticking my dick in her.  Will I get another chance, or have I fucked this up because of a draft?

Tax Form Filling-Out OCD

I'm trying to finish doing my taxes, and I keep making mistakes on these forms.  Not big, mathematical ones, but, like, one digit wrong in the tens place, or writing the amount on the wrong line.  My OCD is kicking in big-time, so I keep printing out forms and doing them, only to fuck up again so I reprint more.  I have printed them out at work, which I know is frowned upon.  I also have printed them at the library, where I am typing this blog post right now, but it's 20 cents a copy, which is why I printed them at work while I was at work.

This library sometimes has free copies of the main forms, like the 1040, lying about, which is great and another reason why the Twin Cities is a good, moral place to live in.  But I fucked it up, again, and I'm tired of re-doing it, so I am just going to give the federal government the 1040 where I wrote a whole amount on the wrong line.  Even my OCD, as bad as it fucking is right now, has limits.  Besides, I just printed out another form and I think I did it completely right, so yay, me, be happy with that one win.

Downtown Thrice

I have completed the first of not one, not two, but three trips to downtown Minneapolis I will take over two days, or technically (from the time I got into downtown for my first trip in yesterday/Saturday till the time I will leave downtown for my last trip out tonight/Sunday night) about 31 hours, give or take.  It really doesn't make sense for me to hit the same place thrice in such a short amount of time, but I'm doing it.

The two times today/Sunday are the "important" times.  In the afternoon I have to go get a hard hat I won at an auction (if I explain this in a blog post, that means I've overcome my shame), and six hours later there's a Timberwolves Game for which I got a free ticket.  I will not stay in downtown Minneapolis for six hours, especially when I can work on my taxes instead.  I guess I could have skipped going to my college Game-watching bar and just listened to the Frozen Four Final on satellite radio instead, but I wanted to see it in public.

I wonder, though, if I should use the minivan in the afternoon.  I don't want to tax my car, and it seems stupid overkill to drive it to the same place twice.  Plus, I need to put the van through a more rigorous trip than just the grocery store.

Buying Wiper Blades Has Become So Complicated

Finally put on the new wiper blades I bought through Amazon yesterday/Friday.  Bought them for both my car and my parents', so there are six total blades that have been on both since ... oh, I want to say March of last year.

I bought five total.  One of them is the wrong length -- maybe (see below).  So there are two that still need to be replaced: My passenger side and the rear on the minivan (which, I want to say, has been back there for years).  Yeah, it's kind of a half-assed job seeing that two blades still need to be swapped out and I bought one that doesn't fit.  And surprisingly, Amazon wasn't much of a help; I ordered these through them before, but for some reason, like you see, I couldn't all of the right ones ordered.

It still seems strange that I would buy wiper blades through Amazon when Wal-Mart has them, so a few months ago, I went there.  I've bought a replacement or two there in the past, but this time around, things were different.  I'm going by the length of the blade, which used to be printed, in big digits, across the top of each blade package -- you know, "25," or "16," etc.  For some goddamn reason, there aren't just digits there anymore.  Some of them have a letter in front, and then a dash, and then what appears to be the length of the blade, and then some of them have a dash and yet another number after it.  What the fuck, man?  I just want a blade that fits my car, and they're complicating it, and I know it doesn't have to be.

About that blade I may have ordered by mistake: It's 13 inches long, and I swear I was told that is the length of my car's passenger-side wiper.  But I have seen in other places that it's actually 14 inches.  And believe me or not, the manufacturer can't give me a straight answer, and Google can't aggregate the websites that will tell me definitively whether it's supposed to be 13" or 14".  I looked through the links, and I see both lengths given.  Can it be either?  That seems dangerous to me.

Maybe it's my fault for not writing the lengths down.  But damn, they're just wiper blades.

Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: March 2026

I have to admit that since the last Hooters in the state closed a few weeks ago, I haven't looked forward to reviewing the Hooters calendar as much.  It seems kind of pointless to point out which Hooters babes are the hottest when I can't see the real thing at the Mall Of America.  But I am duty-bound by my OCD to do this until the end of the year.  And you know, it's gonna be a bit funny to not do these breastaurant calendar reviews after this year ... unless Twin Peaks moves into the Hooters space, like I'm guessing it could.

Anyway, I have looked at all baker's dozen waitresses, and I'm very, very aroused by this month.  And I'm not saying that just because March is my birthday month.  OK, maybe I am a bit.  As you could probably imagine, because it's the month of St. Patrick's Day, many of the girls here are dressed in green, which happens to be my favorite color (probably because March is my birthday month, also granted).  But with all those caveats, I will list eight Hooters servers who caught my eye.

In eighth place is Erica, hailing out of St. Peters, Mo.  Long blonde hair, in a two-piece green bikini (you know, just to save myself some time and finger strokes, assume the Hooters woman is wearing a two-piece green bikini unless I describe what she's wearing).  Nothing else striking about her, but she's directly facing the camera.  Also, since she works in the St. Louis area, I want to think I would be able to have her sign my calendar if I went down there on vacation -- "if" being the operative word since I don't plan on going anywhere big or far on vacation until this current administration is deposed.

In seventh place is Haley, from Hialeah, Fla.  Long, dark brown (maybe black) hair.  She seems to be sitting between two walls made out of logs.  She's also posed three-quarters to the camera, which deprives us of her whole body.  But she's pulling up the sides of her bikini bottom, plus I just noticed that she has (or seems to have) thick hips.  Don't see that every day on a Hooters girl.

In sixth place is Mia, of Weston, Fla.  Curling, dirty blonde hair reaches down to her small tits.  She's also doing the bottom tug thing.  (Come to think of it, most of the waitresses here are doing that.)  Like I said, she's got a petite body.  She looks 18.  But that youth and innocence -- assuming she's of age! -- is really cute to see serving you wings.

In fifth place is Mia, hailing from Mesa, Ariz.  Think Zendaya.  With curly dark (probably black, possibly brown) hair, she is not wearing a green bikini.  Instead, she's wearing a light blue/periwinkle two-piece.  She's facing almost directly at the cam.  She's got that vertical slit on her stomach, a sign of a slim, lithe body.  Also, she's tugging a bit on the right side of her bottom down.  Forty years ago, that would mean a glimpse of her pussy hair.

In fourth place is Cass, from Buford, Ga.  Light blonde hair that cascades halfway down her body.  Don't know why in the hell she's holding a life preserver.  But she is sporting a red, one-piece, old-school bikini, and it's slit so low down to her stomach that you get a good shot of her left sideboob.  And with her hair thrown over her right shoulder, she looks absolutely gorgeous.

In third place is Karli, out of North Charleston, S C.  Long, jet black hair.  She's directly facing the camera.  She's not so much tugging her bikini bottom so much as pinching the right side of it with her fingers.  She's wearing a belly chain, ooh-la-la.  And you can tell that her tits are fake, but frankly, those bolt-ons look so good on her, I don't care!

Before I proceed with the top two, I want to remind you again that March is the month of St. Patrick's Day.  St. Patrick obviously is from Ireland, and Ireland is known for its redheads.  Thus, you would figure that Hooters would put redheaded Hooters girls in the calendar for March.  And I am a sucker, if not a whore, for redheads, so the two gingers in March '26 complete this list.  Ironically, though, neither of them are wearing anything green, even though that would make sense for the month.  That green and red would also provide, in my humble opinion, a sexy contrast (or would they be complementary to each other?) that has powered many of my sexual fantasies.

In second place, also hailing out of Mesa, Ariz., is Brittany.  She is knee-deep in a pool.  She mostly has her left side flashing toward the camera, which isn't great, but I see a tiny shot of her bikini bottom, and it's cut enough that I think I would see at least half of her ass.  She too throws her long hair over her right shoulder, and that combination, plus her slight grin, makes for an unstoppable picture.

Finally, in first place is The Main Girl, Emma, from ... oh, what a coinky-dink, she's from Mesa, Ariz., too!!!  She is wearing a black, cut-through Hooters tank top and black Hooters bikini bottoms, the left side of which she is grabbing.  Most of her right side is facing the photographer, but that means you can see her left sideboob.  You can also tell she is wearing a (presumably Hooters-themed) bikini top, which is a bummer because I would rather not see anything underneath her tank top.  But she is arching her back to emphasize her hot torso.  She looks sexy posing with pursed lips.  And she has thrown her long hair over her left shoulder.  This photograph is just fucking sex personified, not gonna lie.

So congratulations to Emma, and the other seven hot women comprising an excellent March 2026.  And don't worry -- I already jerked off to y'all!!!

Expenses Without Receipt

Starting from Thursday, April 9:

• Well, we should really start on Easter, aka Sunday, April 5, when I went out to the Heights to finally see Psycho.  Man, that shower scene is killer.  Ticket, popcorn, pop and tip: $26.
• Later that evening *****y whacked me off.  I wanted to see her on Easter because she is a regular churchgoer and I find it somewhat ironic that she goes to church and then later that day she gives me an HJ for money, specifically: $150.
• Friday, April 3: I didn't expect to spend money, but Father wanted Powerball tickets, so out I went.  And because I have to stick to my rule of spending cash or using credit cards on a least two things in a day, I decided that I wasn't going to have veggie chips and veggie dip for dinner and instead try a mom-and-pop Latin American restaurant.  There are a few places around here that are recommended.  But they were closed by the time I went out -- I stayed to listen to the end of the South Carolina-UConn women's college basketball Semifinal and in particular Geno Auriemma's meltdown at Dawn Staley -- so I went to a place that was open but fell just below 4 1/2 stars on Google Maps: Que Taco.  Not bad.  I got their birria tacos, and they are the biggest tacos I've seen around the area yet.  Wanted to use the bathroom, but they cordoned that part of the restaurant off with chairs and a mop wringer bucket.  Might go there again if only because it's open when I want to nightcrawl.  I have the receipt, so this EWR is for just the tip: $2.
• Now we go back to Sunday, March 29, where I laid into ****e.  She was unstable on this day, sadly.  She called me while I was still driving to her place asking me where the hell I am.  Her cock-sucking wasn't as on point as it has been in the past.  And after we got done fucking and I laid in bed all tuckered out, she took my underwear and socks and placed them in a pile next to what what was either clothes she was going to launder or trash she was going to throw away.  I was glad I was getting dressed before she did anything to it.  But when I grabbed my boxers, I saw that they were right above a wad of either wet toilet paper or paper towels either she cleaned up the bathroom with or I used to wipe up all my cum.  There was a huge wet spot on the boxers, and I needed to wear them because I was going to a brewery afterward.  I asked ****e if I could use a hair dryer, and that did the trick.  But this is the first time something like this happened.  Whatever; I'm thinking of seeing her again next weekend.  Price: $120.
• So this brewery is doing this thing where I could bring in a Minnesota United jersey and they would remove the Target logo in the front and replace it with the Rebel Loon, a symbol of the Twin Cities' resilience and defiance in the wake of this Republican government's oppression earlier in the year.  I waited and had an early dinner and beer while they were hacking my replica Loons jersey.  But for some reason I couldn't use my card to pay for this service.  Thankfully I had enough cash on me to do it: $30.
• Back further to Monday, March 23, the date of my alma mater getting their butts handed to them by South Carolina.  Our Game-watching bar charges extra when you pay by credit card, so I now pay by cash as often as I can, and I did so on this night.  With tip: $40.
• Sunday the 22nd was the last day Hotters at The Mall Of America was open.  Sad, sad day.  Glad I got there when I did; they got so busy, and they got so cleaned out, that they closed their doors at 6 even though they usually close on Sundays at 10, I think.  Oh, and when I asked if there was any food available, my Hooters girl said they still had burger patties.  Not burger buns, but patties.  And shit, I almost ordered one.  But I settled on my Big Daddy-size Bud Light and the two shirts they still had on sale.  Didn't think I wanted such memorabilia, but when one shirt was only five bucks and another server came around saying the other shirt, really a cancer-themed crop top, was only a buck, well, I had to jump at the chance.  My last total I spent at the Megamall MOA, with tip: $40.
• And on my way out I think I saw a Girl Scout Cookies stand.  That's where I bought the Lemonades.  Glad it was a Girl Scout who did the sale and not her mom; these kids are supposed to learn how to sell and do business, right?  Paid: $6.
• Back to Saturday, March 14 ... a fellow alumni's kid is in this covers rock band.  The band is really good, and I saw on Facebook that they were playing at a brewpub close to me.  I stayed there until the snowstorm everyone was dreading started to look really bad.  But before I left I left tips for the young whippersnappers: $4.
• Shit, man, now we're really going back ... to Sunday, February 22, in fact, when I went to the Heights for the first time since I think the theater got new owners.  I went to see Battleship Potemkin, a silent film classic I have wanted to see for a long time.  It was accompanied by a solo musician who played the piano.  What I wasn't expecting was her to use a snare drum and a crash cymbal.  I have seen a silent film once or twice with a full band, but never have I heard percussion used -- but it was a very, very welcomed new experience.  Paid for the ticket with my credit card, so this total is for the popcorn, pop, and tipping the concession stand: $13.
• On Saturday the 21st I got a shave from the local barber school.  The person shaving me acted like he didn't give a shit, so I didn't give much of a tip.  See, this is why I'm willing to pay five times as much to get my face shaved.  Or, maybe I should just do it myself again.  With tip: $12.
• For Valentine's Day I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Version) to see my ATF.  Where else would I go on February 14?  So glad she was there working; she had said she didn't know if she was going to take the day off.  Cover, tips, drinks from me and ******a and 20 table dances from her ... well, I see that I didn't write the total amount down after I left the club, so I'm just going to pull an amount out of my ass and say that I spent: $230.
• Sunday, February 8: Went to Grandpa Joe's (formerly Blue Sun Soda Shop) to get some premium ginger beer and ginger ale for the cocktails I wanted to make.  I also grabbed a bottle of RC and a bottle of root beer from some company.  Six bottles that cost: $14.33.
• I think later that day, *****y came over to wank me: $150.
• Finally, on Sunday, February 1, ******e came over to wank me: $120.

Yes, I keep saying this: I need to do these more frequently.  Done through April 9.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Wild (Last Week: -2).  There's very little chance they're going to move from their slot of third in the Central in which they've been in since what seems like The Gilded Age.  And I still have a bad feeling they're going to fall flat on their faces in The Stanley Cup Playoffs.  But I have to acknowledge they're playing as good as they have all season, and it's even better that they appear to be ramping up just as the postseason is starting, which is the best way to go into the postseason.

They had a busy penultimate Week to the regular season with four Games, but they won all four.  They had a close Win Sunday, winning in Detroit, 5-4, but smashed the other three contests (home to Vancouver Thursday, at Ottawa Saturday, and home to Seattle Tuesday) by three-Goal margins.  And, to be fair, they are only two Points behind The Bastard North Stars for second.  And it just so happens that they face off in Dallas tonight/Thursday night.  That begins a final three-Game road trip that continues in Nashville Saturday and finishes in St. Louis Monday.  Finally, the last tilt of the regular season is the next night, home versus Anaheim.  They could finish with home ice for the First Round series vs. The Team That Was Stolen From Us v.2.0.  Not too shabby.

#0: United FC (Re-Entry!).  Didn't think it would happen, so kudos to the Loons for finally winning on the road for the first time all Year, and doing it in Carson, Calif., against glamour team The Los Angeles Galaxy.  Anthony Markanich scored the first Goal.  Marco Reus tied it up for the Galaxy, but Nectarios Triantis fed an endline pass to Kelvin Yeboah for the Match-winner.  It is also only the second MNUFC victory at the Galaxy ever.

They still have a grueling portion of the schedule to get through.  They continue out west where they play San Diego FC, the team that bumped United FC out of the playoffs last season.  I wonder if the XI came back home before flying back out west. ...

#-1: Twins (Last Week: -4).  This organization they were so disinterested in winning that home fans have stayed away from Target Field for the first homestand of the Year (the cold weather doesn't help).  So of course that would be the time when the club's merry band of youngsters and never-weres rise up and score a 5-2 screening Week.  The most impressive Win by a country mile was Tuesday's, when they defeated the Tigers at home, 4-2.  Back-to-back defending American League Cy Young Champion Tarik Skubal was on the mound for Detroit, and he struck out seven Twins batters.  But he got chased in the Fifth Inning and got the Loss.  Skubal issued his first two Walks of the season.  Moreover, he got upstaged by ... Taj Bradley, the Pitcher the Twins picked up from Tampa in exchange from Griffin Jax at the Trade Deadline last Year.  He went 6 1/3 Innings, walked none and fanned ten.  Could pitching performances like that be enough for the Twins fanbase to come back to the stadium and pay good money to the Pohlads, who'll only pocket the cash?

They go for the sweep of the Tigers this/Thursday afternoon.  They then travel to Toronto for three over the weekend.  They then come back to host Boston for a trio beginning Monday.

#-2: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -5).  Dropped the three-Game series at Iowa, although both defeats on Saturday and Sunday afternoon were only by one Run.  They took out their frustrations on South Dakota St., whom they destroyed, 16-7, at Siebert last/Wednesday night.

This Week: A Trio at home against Washington for three, then the return home-and-home date with St. Thomas Tuesday afternoon.

#-3: Gopher softball (Last Week: -1).  Caught a glimpse of the last Out(s) of Minnesota's 10-1, five-Inning, Mercy Rule verdict on cable in a bar and, quite frankly, I like the fight in these players.  Can they keep it up with a three-Game series at Washington?

#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -3).  While the Wild have been soaring, the Woofie Dogs have been sinking.  A 1-3 Week featuring a Win at Indiana against a Pacers team that had none of their most frequent starting 5 playing.  That victory clinched at least sixth place in the West, aka an actual playoff spot.  But golly, Jaden McDaniels played through a concussion and Anthony Edwards is still out, and may not be 100% by the time the Wolves need him.

Their season ends this screening Week.  They finish a three-Game roadie with a road date against Houston tomorrow/Friday night.  They then host The Bastard Charlotte Hornets Sunday night ... and then that's it for the regular season.

My God, I am so tired.  And I have been tired around this time of night (which is after midnight) for the past week or so.  What's causing this?  Spring forward got implemented a month ago, and sometimes I react negatively with changes at work, so I don't think my recent inability to stay up has anything to do with that.  But what is it?  I don't know.  All I know is I am too tired to blog post anything more than what you are seeing right now.

I Need To Stop Worrying About Bad Things That Might Happen And Instead Celebrate The Good Things That Actually Happen

Had to call Mother last/Monday night because there were a lot of bills that came in.  There were also a couple letters I thought she needed to know.  One of them dealt with a credit card that is about to close if my parents don't use them soon.  She told me to put it in a bag for mail she needs to look at "When she comes back home."  And I realized that it's been three months since they left and, even though I believe them when they say they're going to stay out in Las Vegas a little longer than they usually do, eventually they are going to come back.  And that makes me sad.  Not only have I not done a damn thing in regards to going through all my stuff, but I like living here on my own, as I usually do when they're wintering.  Them coming back, whenever that is, truly feels like an invasion of privacy.  And I will rue the day when they tell me they're returning here.

But I get down like that even though I don't know when that'll be -- or, and maybe I'm thinking wishfully, if they come back.  I know I need to look at the bright side -- very bright side in the case of Michigan winning the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament later last night.  That means I have won about a grand in this big bracket pool I've competed in for the past two decades.  While I always play hoping I would win, never in my wildest dreams would I think I could beat out almost 1,300 entries to place, get this, fourth.  Sure, I would have rather won and pocketed the five-figure jackpot along with it.  But I was much, much closer to the bottom for last year's Big Dance.  Honestly, I am more proud of myself for finishing in 4th place in this than getting my degree.

That's something worth celebrating, and if I celebrate hard enough, I'll forget that one day, and maybe soon, my parents will come back home.

RIP, Taco Bell Near Me

So two weeks ago, after seeing my alma mater fall to South Carolina in the NCAA Women's Basketball Tournament, I drove home.  Sometimes I take a path home that takes me past the closest gas station to my home.  Can't complain about the gas station.  It has a Taco Bell there that I go to all the time.

Well, had.  I think it was the weekend where I actually went to this gas station because I wanted to get some Taco Bell.  And it shocked the shit out of me when I saw one of those industrial-sized dumpsters.  I then noticed that all the Taco Bell signage is gone, completely.

This was coming.  The gas station was a Holiday, but several years ago (I don't know exactly how many), it was sold to Casey's Retail Company, so the Holiday became a Casey's.  They are well known for making and selling their own food under their own Casey's brand.  But even after the changeover and makeover, the Taco Bell was still operating in the left half of the building housing the now Casey's.

I heard the story of how this happened shortly after the changeover when I grabbed some Taco Bell by eavesdropping on a conversation between a Taco Bell worker and a customer who may have been his or her friend.  Taco Bell had a lease for this location.  When Holiday Stationstores or Couche-Tard, the company that acquired Holiday Stationstores, sold this particular gas station to Casey's, they did so on the condition that Taco Bell would be able to stay through the life of its lease.  The Taco Bell employee did not know how long that lease lasted, however.  Well, I guess that lease ran out two weeks ago.

This closing seemed fast.  I got home late that Monday, and Taco Bell drive-thrus are usually open late every night.  So I want to think that late Monday night (technically Tuesday morning) was the very last day they were open.  Casey's then shut everything down and cleaned out the entire Taco Bell (including appliances and tables -- seriously, I went into the gas station yesterday/Sunday and there's absolutely nothing there).  I absolutely marvel at how fast they emptied the place of any and all Taco Bell life.  But they can also completely replace that space with Casey's restaurant just as fast, at least I am convinced they could, and it's been completely empty for two weeks.

Is there something wrong?  I would think that Casey's was biding its time before the lease ended so they could then sweep in, clean house, and put up their own signage and equipment.  So, where are the tables and chairs -- and breakfast pizza Casey's is known for?  In the meantime, I am going to miss this Taco Bell.  It is the closest fast food place to me, so I relied on it for dinner and lunch many, many times over the years.  And now it's gone, just like many other places I believed would continue to exist.

Rest In Peace, TB.

Giving The Van A Little Love, I Guess

I now think I remember what I was going to originally blog post about yesterday/Saturday afternoon.

So I brought in my parents' minivan last week.  I have no idea what maintenance Father did or did not have on it before my folks left, so I just assumed I should not trust him and asked for an oil change and a tire rotation.  This was also the time to find out if there's anything more to the exhaust smoke I saw coming out the passenger side of the van earlier in the year.  And finally, if there was anything else the mechanics saw, let me know; I might get it fixed.

Well, they never said anything about the oil looking fresh, so they changed the oil and rotated the tires.  The exhaust was something; they showed me that there is a hole in the muffler.  But this is one of those cases where one thing could lead to another.  They could replace the muffler for a grand, but they would then have to disassemble the whole exhaust system, and the mechanic was afraid some other part that is closer to the front of the car would get loose or break off, and that would mean, at the very least, three more thousand dollars.  That is one repair that I will not have fixed.

But, while looking around, the mechanic saw that the stabilizer link, whatever that is, on the passenger-side front tire was broken.  To level with you all, the mechanic(s) described its, uh, brokenness in vague and relatively benign terms -- "You'll feel it bounce over bumpy roads," one of them said.  He made it sound like it wasn't worth fixing, frankly.  He gave me the same advice, and in the same tone, when he advised me not to fix the muffler.  But honestly, I felt a little guilty saying no over the muffler -- not to the mechanics, but to the car.  Yes, I'm treating the minivan like it's a living creature.  But I feel guilty that I won't fix what appears to be a major issue because it's just too damn expensive.  And in exchange, I want to "make it up to the car," and throw some money at some repairs to make it run better.  And the van still runs well.  I think it'd make it up north, even though I dare not do it.  I think having a second car around is a good idea, and I will spend some money for its upkeep, just not a few thousand dollars in one heap.  Several hundreds dollars, though?  I said yes, even against what seems to be the advice of the mechanics who spent only half an hour switching out these stabilizer links or whatever.

Am I a fool?  Sure.  But I want to let my car that I still care for it, even a little.

I Continue To Miss Soccer Goals

I've started my day on Apple TV watching the MLS Toronto-Colorado Match while thinking up what I want to blog post about.  And with the Rapids up 2-0 and this being, well, soccer, I let my attention wander, both to my phone and also to this laptop.

I have spoken before about missing Goals because I was looking at my phone.  Well, Toronto scored while I was looking at my lap (specifically theoretical high-speed rail networks in the Midwest), then they tied it up while I was looking at my The Athletic app.  And I'll be goddamned: That is when I finally got the inspiration to blog post, and as I started this blog post, TFC scored again to take a 3-2 lead.

This would have been a sensational Game to pay attention to.  Instead, I saw none of the three Goals of this comeback, and right now, I want to kill myself.

Yellow Poles? For Me?

Weirdest thing when I got home from work last/Friday night.  I noticed that the screen door was opened.  Then I saw a bunch of plastic thin yellow rods propping up the door.  And no, I didn't buy them from Amazon.

Freaking out at this "gift" left for me, I ran to the door.  It was a half-dozen stakes -- you know, things you would put in the ground of your front yard to let you know where your gas and water lines are.  But why in the hell would they piled up against my front door?  And backing up here, what the hell are they?  It looks like the closest thing they could be are like these reflective driveway poles.  I think a part of each rod, close to one end, is painted white, and it's that white part that is supposed to reflect light from a headlight to guide a driver onto the driveway.

Or something.  I didn't take a close look at them because I didn't know why in the hell would someone leave those for me.  It's not like they were lying around my front yard.  Who would even think to give these to me?  That's why I'm still suspicious as hell why they're there.  And yet ... well, these things might come in handy.  I don't know for what, but they might.  So I threw them over my side door.  I'll get around to them when I have the time and if I am no longer scared as to why and how they got to my front door.

Seriously, though -- who would give me these ... yellow poles?  Is this a set-up of some sort?

Fucking Sister's Fucking Mad At Me

So on Tuesday I was downtown at our college Game-watching bar watching the Match for the final World Cup spot between Iraq and Bolivia (the Iraqis won) when I got a text from WhatsApp.  My sister texted me a picture of a piece of mail she got ... and it was in my name.  I don't live where she lives -- how in the hell is my name on a piece of mail sent to my sister's place?

So I texted her, not really upset as she was, I soon realized.  I was hanging out by myself watching some important soccer, so I texted back something innocuous but showing that I am empathizing with her.  That conversation petered out, though, so after I got home and then when I woke up Wednesday morning I thought I would check up on her.  "Do you need me to do anything?" I basically asked, to which she replied, "No, just stop talking about it."  Now I know she's mad about this, and I have to now understand whether she is mad at me.  So I ask her, and she says, "Yes, but stop talking about it."

Well, fuckin' A.  She obviously is upset that my name appears on a piece of mail (junk mail she said -- she threw it away) that has my name on it.  I don't know why or how that happened.  But it's dawned on me that she blames me for this. I texted her, both Tuesday night and Wednesday, how she wants me to help solve this.  But telling me to stop talking about it isn't solving a goddamn thing.  She just shut me down, and not only is that not productive, but it's pretty damn hurtful, too.  She won't let me fix this, so the only thing I can think of as to why she is acting like this is because she's mad at me and she wants to stay mad at me.

I thought for a long, long time to just end the conversation by giving her the middle finger emoji.  Shit, I'm still thinking about giving her that.  But I have to look to the long term, stop needing to have the last word, and not do anything that could really, really piss her off, even though by what she said she's already plenty pissed.

We have very occasional blow-ups.  I don't remember the last time she was this upset with me.  But whenever we do, it's a damn knock-down drag-out.  She can be extremely petty and unreasonable, and in turn, I decide I need to be defensive.  So, instead of giving her the finger, I didn't come back on her at all.  In fact, I muted her on WhatsApp.  And I would mute her on Facebook too if I knew how to do that without blocking her entirely.

I hate how she's making me feel.  Out of all the family members, I'm the closest to her.  She's the only one I think I can be honest and even a bit vulnerable with.  I think she understands me more than the others.  But I don't understand her right now, and I have spent a long, long time since this "exchange" thinking about what she thinks of me right now and when all of this is going to be over.  I'm trying to help, but her silent treatment is making me angry because I don't deserve that.  And I really, really don't know how in the fuck my name got on a piece of junk mail sent to her place.

This fucking sucks.  I feel like the black sheep of this family, but moreso now that I'm fighting with the only family member I am on good terms with.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Gopher softball (Last Week: -1).  On the whole, this screening Week has been very lackluster.  In fact, of all the local teams in action, I feel best about one that had their season end; that's below.

And yet the clear best team this Week are the Gopher softballers, who won their series at Cowles over Illinois over the weekend (despite getting bludgeoned in the middle Game Saturday, 14-6).  They've nosed over .500 in the B1G ... but if you can do that, you shouldn't be losing to smaller programs, and yet the U. did at St. Thomas yesterday/Wednesday afternoon, and by a score of 7-2.  Seriously?

They host Ohio St. for a three-Game series.  And I find this pretty odd -- the series goes from Saturday to Monday afternoon.

#-2: Wild (Last Week: -4).  Sure, they're just about assured of a First Round playoff series versus The Bastard North Stars, and they probably won't have home ice, but can you see this team doing anything with the way they're playing right now?  They managed to scrape by Florida, beating the two-time defending Stanley Cup champs (who now sit in last place in The Atlantic Division) 3-2 Thursday at Sunrise, but got doubled up at Boston on Saturday, 6-3.  This team looks tired, so having several Days off before resuming at home versus Vancouver, The Worst Team In The NHL, could be a nice reset.  But they'll be busy with about two Weeks left in the Regular Season; they travel to Ottawa and Detroit this weekend back-to-back, then come back to face Seattle Tuesday.  How about some consistency, boys?

#-3: Timberwolves (Last Week: 0).  The thought that they could spark to life and gain momentum to end the season is rapidly fading, what with a 22-Point ass-kicking at home on Saturday to leaders of the East, Detroit, and no, winning by 30 at Dallas on Monday means little to nothing.  They currently sit in sixth place in The Western Conference by 4 1/2 Games above Phoenix, so getting pulled into the Play-In probably is no longer a concern.  But Denver is in fourth place by 2 Games, and there are less than two Weeks left in the Regular Season.  And now, not only is Anthony Edwards still rounding back into shape (and missing the start of Games because he needed to take a shit), now Jaden McDaniels is out from week to week with an injury.  The mojo isn't there with this team, and so the expectation that they're contenders is quickly becoming a delusion.

Holy fuck: They have a five-Game screening Week.  It starts punishingly, with visits to Detroit and Philadelphia tonight/Thursday night and tomorrow/Friday night.  They come home to face Charlotte Sunday evening, then have another Eastern Conference back-to-back on the road, namely Indiana and Orlando, Tuesday and Wednesday night.

#-4: Twins (NEW SEASON!).  Whoo, baseball's back!  And whoo-whoo, the Twinks are already 1-4, whoo-whoo!!  I could break down the upcoming season, but who cares?  They have three established guys of note: Byron Buxton, Joe Ryan, and Pablo Lopez.  Lopez is out for the beginning of the season.  I and many others would bet good money that both Lopez and Ryan will be traded in the middle of the season.  There are a bunch of youngsters trying to figure things out with the big ballclub, none of whom move the needle and capture the imaginations of Twins fans to make them think he's the next Kirby Puckett.  I swear that the Pohlads could sell the team right now to someone in Nashville and we would be like, "See ya!  Don't let the door hit you on the ass on your way out!"  So who cares what they're going to do now?

And tomorrow's/Friday's Home Opener might not start due to rain!  No one's going to show up to see them because they suck, and now more people might not show up because they might not even play it!  Serves them right this could be the most embarrassing home opener in the history of the franchise!!!  Whoo-whoo-whoo!!!

#-5: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -3).  Got swept at home to Ohio St.  Whoo-whoo-whoo-whoo!!!  The baseballers are now 2-7 in-conference, so this season feels lost already.

This Week: At Iowa for three, then have a one-off vs. South Dakota St. at Siebert Field on Wednesday.  The weird thing is all times for First Pitch is listed at two Minutes after the Hour.  Two?  Is this some sort of promotional thing?

#-Infinity (tie): Gopher women's basketball and Gopher wrestling (Last Week, respectively: Positive Numbers and Re-Entry!).  OK, so the Gopher women's b-ball team got routed by UCLA Friday by 24 in Sacramento.  Not saying it's not a big deal -- all seasons that end short of a championship are, in its most distilled essence, failures -- but we all knew it was going to happen.  And like I said last Week, this is what I could have hoped for for this program before the Year began, and what I expected as the team finally founds itself during conference play.  The recruits Lindsay Whalen brought in, Amaya Battle most notably, were finally developed because of Dawn Plitzuweit, and this season the results came through.  So this is the proof of concept that there is a plan and it could work.  These are the roots from which hopefully blooms even stronger and better recruits and yields greater outcomes for next Year and beyond.  You never know what will happen, but at the risk of getting ahead of myself, this program is finally looking good for the immediate future.

In the meantime I forgot to talk about the NCAA (men's) wrestling championships back on March 21.  Minnesota as a whole finished an irrelevant ninth place.  But maybe I shouldn't be so hard on the entire team; Penn St. won the title again, so as of now, every other school is as irrelevant as the U.

But, one Golden Gopher won an individual championship.  Max McEnelly, out of Waconia, won the NCAA title at 184 Pounds.  And he did it as the third-ranked wrestler at the weight and upsetting the top-ranked wrestler, Rocco Welsh out of, natch, Penn St., 4-3.  According to the U. athletic department, McEnelly's individual title is the 25th in Gopher wrestling history (won by 19 Gophers total); it's the first individual championship for Minnesota since the great Gable Steveson won back-to-back at Heavyweight in 2021 and 2022; and it's the first title won at a weight other than Heavyweight since Jayson Ness at 133 Pounds back in 2010.  At least that's something.

We could get not one, not two, but three shots of winter weather this week ... and there are chances for ice in all of them, beginning tonight/Wednesday night?  Yeah, fuck winter, and fuck ice.  And oh yeah, fuck ICE, too.  I gotta go to bed.

Thought I listed all the free birthday stuff I've received, but it looks as though I'm not done.  Some time in the past few days, I was e-mailed a reminder that The Lowry is offering me ten bucks off.  Trick is is that the offer ends on the 31st, aka today.  Great.  Now I have to go from the mechanic (I'm bringing the minivan in, for an oil change, tire rotation and God knows what else) to St. Paul (to watch the World Cup Play-In Matches) and then, instead of home, to Uptown to, I guess, get a salad that I'll eat Thursday, I'm thinking.  Then I am going downtown to see the final World Cup Play-In between Iraq and Bolivia.  That Game kicks off at 10 at night.  If that extends to Extra Time, I won't be home till 1:30.  And I have an early shift at work tomorrow/Wednesday.

You continue to see that I'm busy, even if it's with stuff I want to be busy with.  Anyway, I need to write down my tax information in my day planner, like I said I would.

Still Fucking Haven't Done My Fucking Taxes Yet

One of the things I try to do in the month of March when it comes to taxes is list, in my day planner, all the numbers that I need to fill out the returns -- wages, withholding, capital gains, etc.  Well, it's down to the penultimate day and I still haven't done it.  Is it laziness?  Sure, maybe.  But I've been pulling down overtime like the dickens this month.  Also, I've been preparing for March Madness by doing research, and then ... well, yeah, I've been going out.  There are a lot of freebies I can get at restaurants, and by the time I'm done and come back home, I'm just tuckered out.

Things are going to be tight the next two days, too.  I'm seeing Project Hail Mary (in IMAX for only five bucks through my wireless carrier) tonight/Monday night.  Then, tomorrow/Tuesday is a day off for me.  Not to do my taxes, but something much funner than that, namely bringing in my parents' minivan for an oil change and tire rotation it might not need but I'm gonna do anyway because they won't tell me if it needs them.  Also, back when it was colder, I started the van and saw exhaust coming out of the passenger side.  Going to have them look at it, see if anything can be done, and how much it will cost to fix.  Oh, and anything else they see.  Hey, it's a beat-up car, but I need it to run, so if there's anything I can do to extend its life, I'll do it.  Shh, don't tell my folks.

OK, that ain't so fun.  But assuming nothing catastrophic happens when I bring it in in the morning, I'll have the rest of the day to watch the World Cup Playoffs.  There are still six spots available for the tournament taking place in the summer, and those spots are going to be determined in Matches played that day, specifically five in the afternoon and one at 10 at night.  I am going to see them all, if at all possible.  In particular, I'm going to my alumni Game-watching bar for the 10 p.m. Match.  It's for the last spot in the World Cup, and I want to enjoy seeing it.

Yeah, so with all that, how does one do their taxes?  Hell, how does one even begin to even look at their taxes??  I know, right???

So after work yesterday/Saturday I went to the drug store to pick up something for Mother.  When I got back to my, I noticed my phone was missing.  Damn, I knew I left it at my desk.  So I drove all the way down to grab it from my desk ... until not to see it.  So I made a more thorough search of my car, and sure enough, my cell fell over to the side of my seat.

I need to, at the very last, find a cellphone case I can see coming a while away.  I like the one I have because it's durable, but it's black, and I need a color to stand out.  Hmmm ... maybe I will buy it here!

Best Sleep I Ever Had ... Most Awkward Morning I'll Ever Have

Work was hell yesterday.  They were short-staffed at data entry, so the person who would've helped me in The Third Department was keying most of the day.  Thank goodness she was able to help out near the end of the day; there were stacks of papers that allowed tests to be processed, and honestly, I had so much other shit I needed to do that all of that stuff would not have gotten done.  That's a lot of tests that would've waited till today, and people would not have been happy.

Still, I was busy with my own shit.  I knew before coming in to work yesterday that we would be short-staffed.  I had plans yesterday to eat dinner, then go see roller derby.  But leaving work on Thursday all tired and ragged, I was afraid that I wouldn't have time between work and roller derby yesterday, so I broke my planned edict not to spend any money on Thursday and ate dinner (and grab that free birthday ice cream cup) at Culver's.  And, sure enough, I had to stay an extra couple hours at work, so once I decided I hate to shut things down, I immediately went to roller derby, which was an excellent time featuring a championship bout where one team came back from, like, 40 points down in the First Half to take the lead late, only to lose by two Points at the end.

I ate at roller derby, and since this was in a good part of town to eat, I ate a knockoff Taco Bell crunchwrap close by.  And then coming home I was listening to Duke's buzzer-beater over LSU in the Women's Tournament Regional Semifinal.  It was 11:30 by the time I got to my bed, and I think my body was telling me to go to bed.  I figured if I'm not that tired, I would wake up from a nap.

But I didn't.  I woke up when normal people wake up, around 8 or so.  I didn't expect to have a full night's sleep, and at a time when you "should," but I did and I feel really good, of course.

Then, I felt really good.  Part of me going to bed easily was because I wanted to avoid the news about whether Tennessee lost to Iowa St.  I had the Volunteers winning, and it was an important pick to keep my bracket alive for the big, big money.  I saw a skeet that Tennessee was up by one at halftime, but that was it.  I knew I had to finally find out the final (if only because I had to post on Facebook about it), so I looked at my Yahoo! Sports app ... and I saw that they blew out the Cyclones in the Second Half and won going away!  Yippee!!!

Quick update on my bracket: I went 7-0 in Round 3.  I still have Arizona, Duke and Michigan in Round 4, and I think I still am in contention for winning it all.  Out of a thousand people (give or take), I went from a tie for 15th to, get this, fourth.  I think there's a way for me to end up on top, but a lot of things have to break my way.  Meanwhile, there are so many entries that there's one guy who picked Illinois and Tennessee in the Final Four, and he's right up there at the top of the leaderboard with me.

---

And now the other shoe drops: No Kings.  Everybody's going.  Well, everybody but me.  I decided this week not to go.  There is work because they are short-staffed today as well.  And, call me paranoid, but I know that there is surveillance from the federal (don't know about the state) government going on.  I walk on the State Capitol, where everybody is, and there's no telling whether there's going to be a drone recording all of our faces.

I hate that I'm thinking this way.  I hate that I'm chickening out and using work as an excuse, and I am.  I am getting total FOMO right now, and the rallies haven't even started yet, because, even though it's been mentioned in many places, the No Kings March in St. Paul is going to be recognized as The Flagship No Kings March.  Out of the thousands of protests that are and will be going on around the world, it'll be ours in St. Paul regarded as the touchstone.  Senator Bernie Sanders will be there.  So will Bruce Springsteen.  And the more I write about this, the more I regret not going.

And the worst thing about this is the text I got on Messenger.  One of my friends, who has been talking to me off and on about this current installed government, just asked me if I was going.  She, of course, is going, and more power to her.  But I don't know how to tell I'm not going.  We've talked about how much we hate this government and are trying to figure out how to rebel against them.  Surely I would go to something like this, right?  No.  And I don't know how to tell her.

I think she's waiting on an answer.  Maybe I'll take a shower and think up something.  How awkward.

Have I Still Got My Libido At 50?

So after our volunteering event we hung out at a nearby restaurant to watch our alma mater play in the tournament.  And swear to God, there were so many hot women there with bazoombas underneath tight shirts (with bras, boo) that you know were so big they would go "Blammo!" as soon as they were unleashed.  And it probably was the one-off 75-80-degree weather that day that encouraged these hotties to look their hottest.  Damn!

I think I touched myself three out of the last four days.  Probably the aftereffects of feeling hot and horny for the first time on Saturday.  But it also might be me trying to hang onto my youth by convincing myself I could still get it up and unleash my splooge by jerking off as much as I could.  That might also be the reason I am going to try and see ****e this weekend ... or, it might be that I really, truly want to fuck her.

Oh, and there was the hot young thing (but old enough to be legal, trust me!) at Culver's, where I decided to spend money yesterday/Wednesday when I planned on not spending money yesterday/Wednesday, thinking that it's probably the best way to spread out all the free food birthday offers that are about to expire.  Glad I changed my mind, because this blonde was well built, had a huge chest, and wore a tight wifebeater that still showed off her gorgeous belly.  I think I got hard.

Yep, I think I still have a libido at age 50!!!

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

I fell asleep around 10:30 because I was so tired, but I woke up at around 3 and, knowing I have to wake up for good at 6 for work, here I am trying to do this now.  This will be quick and dirty:

Positive Numbers: Gopher women's basketball (Re-Entry!).  OK.  From here on out, everything's gravy.  Even after my adjusted expectations for this program after I saw them in-person defeat my alma mater, they have done everything they probably could have done this year, and hopefully this will be a stepping stone for the Golden Gophers club to build on.

The First Round Game vs. Wisconsin-Green Bay Thursday was ugly.  Apparently (according to one skeet I saw on Bluesky) the Gophs couldn't shoot, couldn't rebound and was making stupid play after stupid play.  The Phoenix led by four Points after three Quarters and were about to crap out in the First Round at home in a 13-4 upset, something that still rarely happens in women's top-flight college basketball.  But thank God for The Blanket Lady.  It's around this time she started running around the perimeter of The Williams Arena court, rallying the crowd, and the team responded by wiping out Wisconsin-Green Bay in the Fourth, 30-9, to win, 75-58.  Phew!

And still, I believe they were the underdog, at home, in their Second Round Game Saturday versus Ole Miss.  With the step up in competition, the team responded better.  And yet the Rebels outscored the U. in the middle two Quarters, 42-29, to take an eight-Point lead into the Fourth.  But Minnesota rallied again, outscoring the Rebs, 19-9, capped off by this Amaya Battle last-second baseline jumper:

Minnesota wins, 65-63, and advance to the Sweet Sixteen for the first time since 2005.  Dawn Plitzuweit has finally taken this program back where it should be.  And sure, they face a daunting task tomorrow/Friday in Sacramento when they face the 1-Seed, UCLA, whose starting five will probably all be drafted in the First Round of The WNBA Draft.  That's OK with me.  All expectations for the season have been met.

#0: Timberwolves (Last Week: -1).  OK, guys, time to lock it in.  Defeating the Celtics in Boston Sunday for the first time since '05 (the same Year the Gopher women's basketball team reached the second weekend of the NCAA Tournament, coincidentally) was good, especially after being down by so much in the First Half.  And beating Houston at home last/Wednesday night in Overtime (in a Game, by the way, that tipped off for national TV at 8:30) was also good, even though it had a whiff of the Rockets deciding they could drop this one. (ETA at 10:55 p.m. on March 26, 2026 that, whoops! what the Timberwolves was pretty fucking rad, actually.  They rallied after being down by 13 in the Fourth.  Then in Overtime, Houston scores 13 Points straight to start, but Minnesota scores 15 Points to end OT and win the Game.  Yes, it looks like the Rockets tried to win this one, but the Timberwolves, who were playing without the injured Ant and Jaden and the ejected Naz fuckin' won anyway.  My bad!)  But even if they are fighting for a spot in the Play-In, you don't lose in the clutch at Target Center to Portland, like they did Friday.  The Two Elves are still hovering above play-in limbo, but if they just didn't keep losing to teams they should beat, I could see them as true contenders this season instead of being a frustrating enigma.

A light schedule this screening Week: Hosting Detroit Saturday (in a special tipoff time of 4:30 in the second nationally-televised Game Minnesota will play in a row), at Dallas Monday.

#-1: Gopher softball (Last Week: -5).  How rare will a series Win this Year be?  They went down to Iowa over the weekend and took two-of-three, sandwiching a 3-2 Loss to the Hawkeyes with a pair of Shutout victories.  Don't get your hopes up, though; they're still 3-3 in Big Ten play and 11-20 overall.  They host Illinois for a three-Game series in the first Games at Cowles Stadium this weekend, then play at St. Thomas Wednesday.

#-2: United FC (Last Week: -4).  I was expecting the worst coming into Sunday afternoon's home tilt against Seattle.  Vancouver just destroyed them, 6-0, and the Sounders probably have revenge on their minds since losing their playoff series last season on Penalty Kicks in both Matches.  So I think the Loons deserve some credit for holding Seattle to a scoreless Draw.  What I was jazzed about the most, however, was that I finally got to see James Rodriguez take to the pitch.  I really thought this was going to be a Kyrie Irving situation, in which he was on the Duke men's basketball team for one season and he was injured (or "injured") for more than half the Year, so he wasn't really on the team.  Actually, it could still be that.  But one of the most electrifying soccer players on the planet stepped onto Allianz Field at the 78th Minute and, frankly, he made the most of it.  He is credited with, I believe, two progressive Passes, one of which was a future-looking one to a streaking ... Anthony Markanich (?) that he crossed over the bar.  Alright.  Now let's see if he can get subbed in sooner.  And let's see if he can assist, or, even better, score.

Off till April 4.

#-3: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -3).  Dropped their first two Games at Indiana before they mercy-ruled the Hoosiers in the getaway Game Sunday, 14-2 in eight Innings.  Then, in the first Game of the season at Siebert Field Wednesday, they ended their matchup with St. Thomas in eight Innings also, walloping the Tommies, 15-5.  Geez, where did this power come from?  Hosting Ohio St. this weekend.

#-4: Wild (Last Week: -2).  I guess it doesn't matter what the Mild from here till the end of the regular season.  Barring a complete collapse, they're making the postseason, and they'll make it as the third-place team in the Central.  But they're coming in far from being a complete package, and yes, as a pessimistic Minnesota sports fan, that bothers me.  Sure, beating The Bastard North Stars Saturday gets them brownie points, but that was in Overtime, and since they're five Points behind them, I doubt they're gonna catch The Team That Was Stolen From Us v.1.0.  Beyond that, they began the Week losing in regulation at home Thursday to Chicago, who is in last in the Central, and they ended it getting doubled up in Tampa Tuesday, 6-3.  This team has the strong whiff of one-and-done, again, and Bill Guerin actually traded for players for a playoff run, again.  Oy.  I still think that all of this stagnation is due to them not fighting to name themselves The North Stars.

Like the Timberwolves, the Wild have light Week.  They complete a three-Game road trip with meetings with Florida tonight/Thursday night and Boston Saturday afternoon.

#-Infinity (tie): Gopher women's hockey and Gopher men's hockey (Last Week, respectively: -Infinity and -Infinity).  It's been some time since I've wrote about teams here only after hirings, but I really did want to talk about both because they're so ... uninspired.  Really, Mark Coyle, this is the best you can do?

Want to start with women's hockey.  Nineteen Years of The Brad Frost Era, the last half of which returned no championships and diminishing returns, and you replace him with ... his assistant?  Really?  The program got stale.  If there was any situation in which you should hire a true new voice, this was it.  Instead, you get Greg "Boom" May, Frost's right-hand man since '23.  You really think the most important thing with this squad is continuity?  And what's with the added emphasis that Greg May has  a nickname of "Boom?"  Who cares?  All this talk about his nickname is going to do is set up the team when they lose.  Stuff like, "Boom -- Gophers lose!"  And what happens if these Goofers blow a lead and lose against Wisconsin and Ohio St. (again)?  The headlines will be, "The Gophers have a boom-boom!"  Did Coyle even reach out to Nadine Muzzerall?

And what about the men's hockey club?  Coyle pushes out Bob Motzko because he had a penchant for blowing it on the big stage, and so you hire ... his assistant, Brett Larson, who succeeded Motzko at St. Cloud St.?  What, are the Huskies now the U.'s feeder team?  And I've heard Larson's tenure at St. Cloud St.  It was only middling, and he didn't develop many of his players to get into the NHL.  This team also needed and out-of-the-box hire, because this is only eliciting yawns.  Gosh, what a tremendous double letdown.

Goddamn, Car Trouble Fucks Everything Up

Man, don't you hate it when you have to stop everything just because of car trouble?  OK, I am exaggerating what happened and didn't happen yesterday/Tuesday, but it's still a pain in the ass.

So I go out to sleep in my car at work for my lunch break.  My paranoid eyes always makes me think I'm seeing something that's not there, but on this day, they latched onto something unusual and, turns out, scary: A bulge/blister/bump on my passenger-side tire.  Honestly, I didn't think anything of it.  I just thought I needed to deflate the air in that overinflated tire (didn't help), and then I went inside my car to nap.  But that bubble concerned me anyway, so I had to go to my cell and Google, "is it dangerous to have a bump on the side of your tire?"  And all the entries in the search said, "Hell yes, it's fucking dangerous!"

(Aside: I seem to have more problems with tires on this car than I ever had with my old one.  Is it because it's a subcompact whose tires are naturally lower profile?  I remember getting one of my tires punctured the Friday before Labor Weekend, and now this.  By the way, that bubble is probably the result of hitting one pothole, or one too many potholes.  Goddamn potholes.)

After making a couple calls to see if I could get a tire after work, I decided that after work I needed to swap out that tire for the spare.  But dammit, my mechanic screwed those lug nuts in so tight I couldn't loosen them.  I did not believe at all that I needed to call AAA, but because I am too weak, I had to.  Luckily, even during afternoon rush hour traffic and him helping me being led astray by his Google Maps, the guy who was about to save me arrived at work after one hour.  The last time I called AAA (and I think it was when I had to stop the minivan around St. Thomas for what was a broken alternator), it was at least twice that long.  And after using WD-40 and a long-handle lug nut remover to get as much torque working, he got the bad tire off.  Roadside assistants are angels, they truly are.

Also angels are, I now realize, the only car mechanic in the neighborhood that's open evenings.  Why aren't there more car shops that are open evenings, or weekends for that matter?  Cars don't break down at night or on weekends?  Anyway, the place I babied my car to was the only one around the area open at 7 at night.  And even though they couldn't get the same exact tire for me that evening, they can do so this morning.  Also, they did what I asked them to: Check the other tires to make sure they're fine, and to check the air pressure on the spare (even though I asked the roadside assistant to check and to pump it up.  I always forget to check the air in the spare).

So I talked about having plans ruined.  Specifically, I wanted to eat at either Culver's or Potbelly, two places where I can get free dessert for my birthday.  I then wanted to go home, look through the mail, call Mother about the mail if need be, then maybe nap before I caught the 8 o'clock showing of Ready Or Not 2: Here I Come.  But after I got everything arranged for the (hopefully) quick tire swap this morning, I got my car back, spare tire still affixed, and I still had time to make the movie.  I didn't feel completely safe that I could drive to the theater to watch when I could, and maybe should, drive back home.  But a mixture of relief that people were able to help me and defiance that I didn't want my car trouble to stop me from the fun I planned on having compelled me to get to the movie.  And I made it in time.  And the film was ... um, bloody and profane, but OK, just like the first one.

One problem after I left the shop and before I went into the theater.  I locked the door with the key fob, but I didn't see the light flicker on indicating everything got locked.  I then noticed that the hood was slightly open.  Now I noticed when I was at the shop, looking through the window into the bay where the mechanics were looking at my car, that the hood was opened up, presumably for the guys to go through their customary check of everything in my car even though I was just there to get a tire replaced.  I didn't think anything else of it, though, because I assumed they would slam the hood shut.  But they didn't.  I didn't drive really fast; you're not supposed to on a spare, plus I used side streets to get from the mechanic to the theater.  But I realized that I drove several miles with the hood open.  The hood of my old car flew open while I was driving to the gym a baker's dozen years ago, and that was the scariest fucking thing that's happened to me on the road ... well, OK, maybe top five.  My point is is that it seems very, very dangerous to drive with the hood open.  I don't think anything got ruined, and yet I feel my car is beyond repair because I drove it with the hood open.  Look, if anything did get damaged, I probably won't know till much, much later.  Fuckin' A, man -- these guys were quick, and they treated me well.  But they fucking forgot to slam my fuckin' hood shut?!

No, I probably won't bring it up.  Again, if there's damage because I drove with the hood open, how would I know?  Oh, well, you take the head-slappingly bad with the good when you're in a jam.  Hopefully they can just get me my new tire and do so quickly and easily.

My Time Is Not My Own (Again)

See, I was so busy this weekend ... that I didn't get around to blog post something about the weekend until the weekend was over.

This past weekend was one where I was, yeah, super busy.  I had a volunteer event down south of here Saturday afternoon, and I had the Loons Match Sunday afternoon.  Both of them were in the afternoon, like I said, but those were things I was planning on doing, so that means I was busy over the weekend.  So much so that I had to set the alarm on my phone for both days, something I usually don't do and usually do dread.  To be completely fair, I woke up on my own on Saturday -- early enough, in fact, to water the plants in the morning.  But the phone woke me up on Sunday, and it felt like I was going to work.  Blech.

Come to think of it, I'm busy this week, too.  I had an alumni watching event last/Monday night and saw my team get their asses kicked.  Tonight/Tuesday night I am planning on seeing my first movie in a while, Ready Or Not 2: Here I Come.  I thought the first one was a kick, so I am looking forward to a sequel I didn't think the box office on the first one would call for.  Tomorrow/Wednesday I might stay in, so there's that.  Thursday I work early, so I might work out for the first time in a long time, or I could see this band in south Minneapolis, or I could take a nap so long that it extends into the evening.  Friday I think I'm going to my first roller derby event in years.  And this weekend I need to use this birthday offer at a bar in south Minneapolis while also hoping to see ****e for a fuck.  I really could use a day to myself, but my libido is forcing me to give up time to things I may regret doing later.  Well, maybe not fucking ****e, but all the other stuff. ...

Where My Scatterbrained Stupid Self Pretty Much Fucked Everything Up

I want to think things went downhill as soon as Florida got upset by Iowa last/Sunday night in the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament.  I had them losing in the title Game.  With that pick gone to seed, I think my chances of winning either of my bracket pools has also gone to seed.

I got the notification from The Athletic while I was about to go into Target.  I had that 5% birthday discount I wanted to use, but I had been thinking all day on how to and even if I should use it.  I knew I wanted to buy baking soda and a new silicone scrubber to replace my dirty loofah (I should blog post about that loofah later).  But what else?  I need to maximize my discount by buying things I need to get, but I kept going back and forth about whether there are items I only wanted to get.  A circle lock, for when I rent out a second storage unit so I can finally really get down to organizing my stuff?  Well, they didn't have one.  Motor oil?  Nah -- I checked prices on my phone while I was in there; it's cheaper in a few other stores.  Should I get a lime?  I think I'll be out and about again next weekend, so it wouldn't make sense.  I swear there was something else I thought I needed to get, but for the life of me, I couldn't remember.  But I did remember the baking soda and scrubber, so that's what I got, and I was able to strike a whopping 60 cents off my total.  Happy Birthday to me!

And then I come home and, once I went into my bathroom, I realized there was something else I really wanted to get: Tea tree oil to put on the back of my head to get rid of the acne back there.  And I knew I was going to forget something when I went to Target.  I thought about writing a grocery list, but I didn't want to write it down, and I didn't want to bring a piece of paper with me.  Still, I knew there would be a good chance I would forget something, and still I didn't want to write anything down.  And so the tea tree oil I really want to buy I will have to buy without that 5% birthday discount.  I'm so ashamed I think I'll have to buy it at Wal-Mart, where I think it's probably a bit more expensive than if I bought it at Target, even without the 5%.  Can't walk back in to Target without hanging my head in shame.

---

I just ate a Krispy Kreme donut with milk.  The Krispy Kremes were free through its application because it was my birthday.  But I didn't want to eat them all at once.  In fact, my OCD compels me to eat them only every other day.  And it turns out I skipped a day.  Hopefully the last one lasts till Tuesday.

Doughnuts, of course, go with milk.  And this quart of milk I had bought, hmmm, some time ago.  I thought it was still good because the use by date stamped on top of the bottlecap reads today/Monday.  So, just like I have done, I poured some milk into a bowl into which I dunk the doughnut.  Once I finish with the doughnut, I slurp up the rest.  But this time, motherfucker, it tasted funny.  And then I smelled it.  Honestly, it smelled kind of funky for, like, a week before today, but it smelled even worse now.  Goddammit, I think I just drank spoiled milk.  I dumped the rest out of the bowl, then dumped the rest out of the bottle.  I thought it would still be good!  But come to think of it, when I opened it for the very first time (I don't remember how long ago), I saw that part of the cap was already pulled away from its rim.  And maybe I'm being a hypochondriac, but I am feeling really dizzy right now.  A little dissociative, too, like I'm not a part of this body that is typing this right now.

But the thing that kills me (literally?) more than wasting milk is the fact that I had, oh, three weeks to finish off a quart of 2% milk and I couldn't fucking do it.  It was just a quart!  Maybe my lactose intolerance gave me second thoughts.  But I had plans on using a lot of it in a smoothie I was going to make.  I have the fruit in the freezer.  But I was going to make it only after I work out, and I've been too damn busy to work out, so I haven't made the smoothie, so I haven't used the milk that way.  Reminds me that I also have greek yogurt inside my refrigerator.  It has a stamped sell-by date of April 16, but that fuckin' stamp did me no favors with the milk, so for all I know, the yogurt's already bad, too.  Might need to bring it with me to work this week.

---

You know what?  I thought I had a third thing I needed to blog post about illustrating how my dumb ass was fucking myself in another, but I forgot.  Oh, my self-destruction is so meta!

List Of Free Birthday Food/Stuff

You probably suspected this: If you sign up and/or get applications from restaurants, they will give you free food on your birthday.  I think you should take advantage of this because when you signed up, you already gave them all your information upon which they sell to other companies.

I already got my three free original glazed doughnuts from Krispy Kreme because it's walking distance from Great Clips, and I figured I might as well get them after I got my hair cut.  But that may be the only birthday-related free gift I have taken advantage of so far -- plus, I know that I already passed up a free, um, flavoring from Starbucks (?) because I could only use that on my birthday. I really appreciate offers that I don't have to use too soon after my birthday, of which there are some.

There are so many I have received that I need to write them down to figure out how much time I have to get each offer, and to see if there's an order to which I should get them if I am under a time crunch.  Then, I figure I might as well blog post about them, and in chronological order.  So, here goes:

• Caribou: free drink (any size, any type), 3/24
• McDonald's: free eligible item, 3/24
• A Bar Of Their Own: $5 off, 3/31
• my alumni association, 20% off purchase online at the bookstore, 3/31
• Potbelly: free cookie, dream bar or shake, 3/31
• Culver's: free single scoop dish or cone with purchase, 3/31
• Subway: free cookie, 3/31
• Arby's: free dessert (with purchase), 4/2
• Chipotle: free guacamole with purchase of $5+, 4/15
• Target: 5% off next purchase, expires 4/15
• Jimmy John's: free Original sandwich, 4/16
• Visionworks: 50% off prescription eyeglasses or sunglasses, 4/16
• Nike: 10% off a purchase of $100+, 5/16

My Buddha, I Think I'm The Bracket King

So I have bitched and bitched here for years about how badly I start off the men's basketball tournament.  This year is different, by far.

I still can't believe this, but I just finished Round 1 with a record of, get this, 29-3.  I have never done better in a Round 1 in my life, and it ain't fuckin' close.  I'm sure my best is, like, 17-15, or maybe even 18-14.  But only three wrong?  Moreover, those three I got wrong (Ohio St., St. Mary's, and Villanova) I had going out in the next Round.  That means that my champion pick (Michigan), the title pairing (Florida), my Final Four (Duke and Arizona), my Elite Eight and my Sweet Sixteen are all intact.  Obviously I have never, ever been able to say that before.

While this puts me in a position way better than I ever have been before in the two bracket competitions I'm in, I know that, because there are so many people playing in the giant pool I care more about (because I could win a lot of money), there are people who are doing even better than me.  It sucks to have a year where you nearly nailed all of the upsets and, just as important, knew to avoid the wrong upsets.  I thought I was Senor Hotshit when I went 14-2 after Thursday.  I wasn't even on the leaderboard.  I wasn't even on the second page.

So the Games continue, and once I again my nearly-pristine bracket will stand in judgement.  There are many Games in Round 2 I need to break the right way, and if, somehow and someway, I can get the picks right at the same rate as I have up to this point ... I might have a good tournament.  Wish me luck!

Sign Of Inattention Or Sign Of Old Age?

I'm just so mad at myself for fucking up the Horse's Neck I made for myself.

I should back up.  I didn't plan on drinking alcohol yesterday/Thursday.  I should blog post about it soon.  Anyway, I went to Hooters because I wanted to use the March coupon before the chaos of them closing down on Sunday.  The chaos has already begun, however.  I just wanted a Coke, but they didn't have it.  Guess there's no use to order more stuff if they're closing down in three days, but I thought they would still have Coke.  (I'm going back before they close for good Sunday evening.  Let's hope they still have running water.)

Anyway, I didn't want a Sprite to go with the wings and swirl cake I purchased, and I didn't want to just have water.  So, with a bit of regret, I got an Angry Orchard, which they still have.  And since I got one alcoholic drink to drink, I might as well have another one, and I decided on a Horse's Neck because the ginger ale in the fridge has been in there for a long while.

I rely on the International Bartenders Association formula for a Horse's Neck, which is 40 mL (they're international) of cognac and 120 mL of ginger ale in a Collins glass.  That's a ratio of three parts ginger ale to one part cognac, right?  That's important for the story.

So I pour out 40 mL from the ABK6 into a small measuring cup I use instead of a jigger because The Wirecutter recommends it.  Then I pour the Boylan ginger ale to the maximum line, which on this measuring cup is 60 mL.  I add it to the Collins.  I pour to the max again.  I add it to the Collins.  Then I pour to the max a third time, because it's a 3:1 ratio, right?  I assumed I had enough ginger ale, so I was shocked that I was short by 10 mL.  I thought I should maybe use ginger beer to top it off, but fuck it, it's late in the day and I have work in the morning, I'll just have to deal with drinking a messed-up cocktail.

I don't have a huge Collins glass.  It might not be a Collins glass.  But some drinks require a long, rectangular-looking glass, and that's what I have.  And for all the cocktails I can make that require them to be stirred, they all fit into this glass.  But this one was different.  Even though I was short of the 3:1 ginger ale-to-cognac ratio, the last pour of ginger ale brought the cocktail right to the rim.  That's odd.  I'm pretty sure past Horse's Necks I've made weren't that full.

And then I realized I fucked it up.  I was fixated on the 3-to-1 ratio, but I completely forgot about dealing with the actual fucking numbers.  Forty times three is 120.  I just needed to pour the ginger ale out to the max twice, not three times, to get the formula right.  But no, I poured out the cognac once (and not even up to the top at 60 mL, just two-thirds of the way at 40 mL), so I had to pour the ginger ale thrice.  That's how my mind operated.  It's probably how it operates.  And I fucked it up.

---

Later I played Zynga Poker.  I continually make the mistake of misjudging what kind of a hand I have.  I play speed-up, so I only have, like, ten seconds to fold, call or raise, and I still make a decision without completely understanding what I actually have.  A few times I actually think I have a better hand than I do, but more often than not I think it's an OK hand when it's, like, an ace-high straight or a full house.  I didn't see I had a full house on this one hand and I could have taken the other "players" in my table to the cleaners if I had accurately seen that.

Pairing my poker blindness with blowing the Horse's Neck, I don't know if me not paying attention is symptomatic of my old age.  I have been not paying attention all my life, and yet I can't help but think that if I were younger, I would have gotten the formula right, and I would be much quicker at deducing what type of poker hand I've got.

If it's old age, I don't know what to do.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5).  I didn't factor in the upside to a tight race in the standings: It doesn't take too much to move up.  The Wolves go 3-1, and so they go back up to fourth place in the West.  Sure, they're only one Game from sixth place, but they're only 1 1/2 Games away from third.  That's how congested things are over there.

The T-Wolves have won their last two Games, both at home, to Phoenix and Utah.  And they won both Games without Anthony Edwards, who will be week to week because of his inflamed right knee.  Frankly, they played great in those two Games without him.  Hmmm, maybe those two things are related. ...

They finish up a three-Game homestand tomorrow/Friday night versus Portland, then they go to Boston Sunday, then host Houston on Wednesday.

#-2: Wild (Last Week: -1).  ETTD, man, ETTD.  They started their busy screening Week losing to three teams currently out of the playoff picture in The Eastern Conference, Philadelphia, The New York Rangers, and Toronto.  And all of those humiliations were at home.  They finally turned around their fortunes on the road, where they beat Chicago in OT on St. Patrick's Day.

So why are they up here after a 1-3 Week?  Because they are still firmly ensconced in third place in The Central Division.  They currently sit six Points behind The Team That Was Stolen From Us v.2.0., and 14 ahead of The Bastard Winnipeg Jets/Phoenix-Arizona Coyotes.  Wins or Losses, no matter -- the Wild are going to be in the playoffs.  From that point on -- that's when we'll start to care.

They finish their home-and-home with the Blackhawks tonight/Thursday night at the Gica.  They then host said Bastard North Stars, then travel to Tampa Bay.

#-3: Gopher baseball (Last Week: 0).  A low-scoring series to begin league play for the Gophs, but they dropped two-of-three, winning 1-0 in the first Game of a Doubleheader Saturday.  (I am absolutely sure there was no scheduled Doubleheader when I previewed the series in last Week's survey.  I see no announcement of it on the athletic department's website.)  They then finished off their U. S. Bank Stadium schedule by losing to North Dakota St. in eleven Innings, 7-4.

I have a feeling sports is going to be really quiet around Dinkytown for the rest of the school Year.  At Indiana for a trio over the weekend, then the club opens up Siebert Field for the season Wednesday against St. Thomas.

#-4: United FC (Last Week: -3).  This takes me back to the expansion days for the Loons.  On Sunday afternoon they got the absolute shit beat out of them by the Whitecaps in Vancouver, 6-0.  Maybe this is a case where Vancouver is really, really good.  But how much of this just bad players?  And this is the time I finally get around to talking about their off-season and what message they sent from their transactions before the season started.

MNUFC was coming off a scintillating playoff series Win over Seattle, a franchise that historically has gotten their number.  Sure, a 1-0 Loss in the Quarterfinals to San Diego was dispiriting, but there was nothing that indicated that changes needed to be made.

Alas, changes happened.  Dayne St. Clair, who was named Goalkeeper Of The Year, was MNUFC's top signing priority because his contract expired.  But while the two sides were negotiating, Inter Miami swooped in and said, "Hey, we want you," to which St. Clair responded, "Hey, I want you, too."  Meanwhile, Hasani Dotson, St. Clair's teammate at Oregon St. who was also drafted in the same class as St. Clair, was thanked by the organization for his service to the Black and Blue; he signed with the Sounders.

Then, Robin Lod, a man who became a fan favorite up here, was not given a contract offer at a length to his liking, so he signed with Chicago, who did.  Finally, for some inexplicable damn reason, the Loons traded hard-nosed Defender Joseph Rosales to Austin FC.  Oh, and Head Coach Eric Ramsay moved after two seasons to West Bromwich Albion ... where he was fired after only eight Matches and 44 Days.  Soccer coaches, man. ...

So anyway, that's four players, veterans and stalwarts, plus the Manager, all moving on.  They're bringing in new pieces, and I know they're trying, but how good could they really be, and how good can they be this quickly?  The signing of James Rodriguez is awesome.  I don't know how in the fuck MNUFC was able to convince a soccer player of that caliber and popularity to come to Minnesota.  But he only subbed in on Sunday.  How often will he play?  And remember that his contract keeps him here only through the summer, even though there's an option for him to stay the whole Year.

On top of all that, Major League Soccer is revamping its calendar.  This is the last Year where they play from February to November/December.  They will have what they call a "sprint" season from February to May 2027, then join up with the rest of the world when they begin their season in the late summer of 2027.  Beyond my grievances over The Flip, I can see MNUFC brass looking at the next year-and-a-half and punting.  Maybe the James signing was just window dressing to appease the masses and keep the dollars flowing in.  But it feels very possible they just want to suck for the next 18 Months in order to, hopefully, get better after May 2027 -- at which point I may not be a season ticket-holder.

United FC play a second consecutive Sunday Game, this one at home vs. ... well, whaddya know, The Seattle Sounders.

#-5: Gopher softball (Last Week: -4).  Well this is fucking shit.  The softballers lost all three of their Games of the Missouri Tournament held over the weekend in Columbia, Mo., to Iowa St., hosts Missouri, and South Dakota.  Maybe another Head Coach might need to be on the hot seat.  Playing at Iowa over the weekend.

#-Infinity (tie): Gopher women's hockey and Gopher men's hockey (Last Week, respectively: -6 and -Infinity).  Well, fuck, that was swift.  In back-to-back days, University of Minnesota Athletic Director Mark Coyle cleaned out the rinks in Dinkytown.  An athletic program that sometimes feels stuck in inertia just fired up the coaching carousel in both women's and men's top-flight college hockey.

On Tuesday, Coyle axed Gopher women's hockey Head Coach Brad Frost.  Well, the way I have it, Frost was on the last Year of his contract, and Coyle announced that he won't be offered a new contract, so I think the term "fired" that's been bandied about is inaccurate and a bit harsh.  Also, Frost was here 19 Years, by all accounts he's a nice and good guy who ran a clean program, and he did bring Minnesota four national championships in a five-Year span.

Unfortunately, the last title was a Decade ago.  Since then, it is a bona fide fact that both Wisconsin and Ohio St. are the best programs in top-flight women's college hockey, and Minnesota, for all their insular boasting, are a clear cut below.  And Saturday's upset Loss to Northeastern at home -- and they didn't seem to be competitive as they allowed the Huskies to race out to a 4-0 lead before Abbey Murphy played Heroine Puck and scored twice in the Third Period -- was a blaring sign (if only to the fanbase) that things weren't trending in the right direction.  I don't like it when good people lose their jobs, especially when they've been at that post for a long time.  But I agree with this move.

So, if Minnesota clearly is The State Of Hockey, who do they turn to?  There is one and only one top target that could revive the program's fortunes: Nadine Muzzerall, current Head Coach at Ohio St., who has the overall #1 Seed in this Year's tournament and who has won two championships under Muzzerall's helm.  She is One Of Us in the sense that she played for the Maroon and Gold and was an assistant under Frost before the Buckeyes hired her away.  The problem, of course, is money.  I am always skeptical if the U. can pony up the funds necessary to pry the best away from another powerhouse school.  And this is The Ohio St. University, who will not pinch any penny in order to hire and keep the best.

With that said, besides the pull of trying to revive her alma mater, there is one thing the U. has that Ohio St. doesn't have: A decent rink dedicated to the women's team.  I hear that Ohio St.'s arena sucks.  And the university has promised Muzzerall for years that they would build her a new arena that could stand alongside Ridder and Wisconsin's LaBahn Arena, but that promise has been delayed season after season.  Does she get fed up?  And if Muzzerall decides to stay, who then does Coyle go for?  If not Muzzerall, I would take a top assistant from either the Buckeyes or the Badgers.  Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Bob Motzko I didn't see coming.  Coyle actually did fire Motzko yesterday/Wednesday (after eight seasons here) because Motzko had one Year left on his contract.  The U. announced that he and the school "had a mutual parting of ways," but I don't believe that at all.  I don't think the men's program was trending in the wrong direction.  What was troubling, even infuriating, was that Motzko never was able to deliver a title despite mostly having great teams.  And he developed a reputation, unfortunately, as a choker.  I just researched this fact to make sure it is true: In the last three NCAA Tournament Games where the Gophers and Motzko lost and were eliminated, they had a two-Goal lead and blew it.  The One That Got Away surely was the 2023 title Game, where they had Quinnipiac on the ropes early, but let them off the hook so the Bobcats could win in Overtime.

I could see Coyle firing Motzko after another collapse in the NCAAs, but not in a situation like this, where everyone could foresee a rebuilding Year after all the talent they lost.  Yes, their record this Year was the worst since the '71-2 season.  But I thought that would put Motzko on the hot seat, where he would have one season to negotiate the transfer portal and see if NIL money could attract junior players from Canada and the like.  Maybe, and similarly to Frost and the women's team, embarrassing defeats at home -- reportedly, during the last home series against Michigan St., people were booing Motzko -- forced Coyle to make a move now before fan apathy and antipathy became even more severe.

OK.  So where does Coyle go with the men?  One early name has popped up: Garrett Raboin, current Head Coach at Augustana, which is about to get into the NCAAs for the first time in only the Vikings' third season in existence.  He was an assistant under Motzko at the U. and, before that, at St. Cloud St., Raboin's alma mater.  And he's One Of Us; he's from Detroit Lakes.  I think I've talked myself into liking this pick.

You know, I hate screwing over other people.  But opting for a fresh starts feels very invigorating, doesn't it?

An Easy Day Turned Into A Busy Night

I did one of the main chores I wanted to do on my birthday: Rake the roof.  I did that after I took a hard nap, so I was energized going into the evening, where I wanted to watch the World Baseball Classic title Game (won by Venezuela, 3-2 over the Americans) while working on my bracket.

There was one other thing I wanted to do: Clear the back deck of the half-foot of snow.  I was going to do it during the WBC, but I wanted to wait until it stopped flurrying.  Then, I got caught up on the close Game, plus I was really crunching the data on the bracket.  Then the Game got really interesting, so I decided I would shovel after the Game was over.

But gosh darnit, right after the trophy ceremony, my sister called.  And of course I had to talk to her for an hour about stuff.  Just then I remembered I had to do something else: Send out an important e-mail that had to be sent today/Wednesday or else my alumni association was going to get pissed.  That's when I had to end my phone call with my sis.  But then, instead of immediately going out to shovel, I went back to number-crunching for my bracket.  I finally got out to shovel around midnight.

Thankfully, sending out the e-mail was easy.  But I still need to think about my bracket, and I finally got around to blog posting this.  And I am tired, and I should go.  Peace.