Wanna Tip On OnlyFans? Beware!

I started casting about for women (models mostly) who publish photographs of themselves naked on Patreon.  But last year or so they tightened their standards to only allow, uh, tastefully done nudes on their site.  Most models (and, as soon as I realized cam girls and even porn stars started off there, them too) I followed made the decision that they couldn't make money if Patreon was going to apply a stricter standard to what they consider to be acceptable on their platform.  So they went to OnlyFans.

I think I saw OnlyFans several years ago on my pseudonymous Twitter account for which I follow porn stars and bikini models and the like.  One porn star didn't tweet anything besides boasting she had signed up this person and that person to her OF account.  I was at first reluctant to join all the models and hot women who emigrated from Patreon to OnlyFans.  But I was convinced to finally sign up not by a porn star or bodybuilding babe but by a photographer who photographs women in the nude.  I have been Facebook friends with him for the hot pictures he publishes, but he frequently was suspended and banned for the nudity in those photos, and he began to complain vociferously about Facebook's standards.  He announced that he finally gave up and planned to move all of his work (he has had a long career shooting women naked) to OF.  He is such a famous, skilled photographer that I gladly subscribed to his account at, I think, 11 bucks per month.

And that's when it dawned on me that OnlyFans has become an online, uh, membership web portal for porn.  I started scanning all the hot babes on Facebook, and some of them advertised their OF account.  I resisted, but then I started being curious about some of them, so I took a peek.  And then I saw them advertising other models, none of whom I am Facebook friends with.  Some of those models and girls enticed me with free accounts, which actually show nothing but teaser shots and the like.

Still, I followed those free accounts.  That meant that they could send e-mails to my OnlyFans inbox, where they sometimes describe screengrabs and videos that I could see ... if I pay for it with my credit card.  Oh no, I don't ... well, eventually I caved.  I remember it was specifically for a woman who is not on Facebook, but on her free site was one of the only, if not the only, babe who posted shots and videos of her naked.  I was waiting for someone to take that step towards me, and so I rewarded her by taking a step towards her.  I pushed a few buttons, and I got to unlock this photo of her sucking off a guy, presumably her husband.  It was ... well, she has a banging body, but knowing that she was in her, or their, house and he's blowing someone she probably is married to is something of a buzzkill.

But in for a penny, in for a pound, amirite?  There are a lot of women I have subscribed to.  Many of them are former Playboy Playmates who are still trying to make a buck out of their naked bodies.  (I found them listed on a post in Vintage Erotica Forum.)  I jerked off to them before, so I would love to get hard to them again.  And since I was going to "tip" (that's OF's word for unlocking these otherwise hidden photos and videos) Playmates, I might as well try a few of these other models and cam girls, too.  They set the rate at which each contribution sent to my e-mail is worth, and some of them are obscenely expensive.  I have seen one woman, a hot bodybuilder (seriously, her bod is to fucking die for), say that I could see her naked for $150.  I have a secure job right now, but no.

So when I finally made the decision to see what these locked contributions are all about, I decided I would have a limit: I would not pay more than ten bucks to see something.  So over a few days, I charged a few of these secret boxes to the credit card I have on file.  And ... fuck me, I've been fooled.  I have seen one model send a topless photo, and there is one video of an amateur model fellating a big, black plastic penis.  Everything else I tipped for are teaser shots where the chick is holding her arms right in front of her tits.  The closest I see are thongs showing the ass.  It's a ripoff.  And frankly, I'm not into seeing chicks sucking fake dick.  Also, that video is over five minutes long.  I haven't had the desire to watch all of it yet.  I saw that first video of that woman sucking a real dick in its entirety because the video was shorter, but, now that I think on it, it's a real guy, with real sperm shooting out of his urethra.  Now that's a real blowjob.

All told I think I spent ... egad, $40-50 on these photos and videos.  I might patronize the two who actually get naked and do shit, but I have been burned so many times that I think I should err on the side of not tipping for these.  They're not giving me what I want, and I think I've wasted enough money, although learning a lesson may not be a complete waste.

Stopping And Smelling The Roses

I didn't even know if I was going to leave the house today because there was a forecast of freezing ice that was going to make the roads slippery and treacherous.  But the roads were fine, perfect even (well, as perfect as land with snow and ice already on it can be), so I went out mainly to get tested but also to check on my storage unit (where I then decided I might as well pay for my unit for the next year) and get gasoline for my car.  (I also ate Taco Bell.)

I wish I didn't have stuff to do and instead just note the weather.  Because today, it was perfect -- well, not entirely, but this afternoon had many elements I love in a day.  It was mostly cloudy and not too cold.  It actually was above freezing during much of the afternoon.  Sure, I wish there were no snow and ice on the ground so I don't slip and fall.  And it could be 20 (or 30, or even 10) degrees warmer.  But it should be cooler today, and it could be much cooler today, and it's not.  And so, after I left my storage unit, even though I told Mother I would be home by 3, I decided I was going to go to a park.  I need to get a walk in, and this afternoon had very good conditions in which to walk.  Alas, I couldn't find the nearest park to my storage unit, and I figured I shouldn't waste too much time finding another one.

But I thought of something once I got home, however.  I first wanted to take a picture of both ends of my street, as well as my house.  Just a late-January snapshot of the place I call home, and it was beautiful.  But then I thought, "Hey, maybe my sister's best friend's mother is on her stoop, also enjoying the deceptively beautiful day like I am!"  Actually, there was little-to-no chance she would do that; she's old and she's in a chair, so it wouldn't be wise nor safe for her to be outside for too long.  But thinking that she might be there was enough for me to get my "exercise" in, so I walked down a couple houses, looked to see that no one was outside, and I walked back.  And in that, oh, 20 yards back and forth, I looked up at the gray, overcast sky, breathed in and out, felt warm (really, above freezing is not cold so long as you're dressed competently), and got in my appreciation of this winter day.  I don't know if I'll have the time, and I don't know if the weather will be as accommodating in the future (even though I did something similar just before Christmas, and the weather isn't always that conducive to exercising outdoors then, either).  But I should do more of this -- walking and appreciating.

Brain Fog, Maybe?

I have had headaches from time to time seemingly since the pandemic began.  It might be hypochondria, and it might not be causal, and I continue to test negative according to the antigen test (and one antibody test, even though I took that in the late summer), but I have had them.  I wouldn't consider them to be debilitating like migraines, but at their worst I can't remember having headaches like them.

On top of that I have not felt mentally sharp for the past year or so.  I totally attribute that to the pandemic and the ensuing lockdown.  I cannot do what I want in the evenings, so I'm resigned to lolling around at home, which makes me lazy and unfocused.  Also, I think exercise would do me world of good, for my mind as well as my body.

With so much time on my hands, ironically (maybe) I have let all my chores go without doing anything.  Letters keep piling up, unopened.  Father did laundry for me earlier in the week.  He even folded them.  But I haven't put them away yet.  And I still haven't found that damn lottery ticket I bought at The Mechanic Around The Corner for my sister.

At work, at the top of every hour, someone from my row of workers is supposed to check this form pinned to a clipboard.  We call this the "board."  These folders we check and clean are initialed once we are done with them, but as a final, final check, someone (and it rotates every day) is supposed to add up the number of folders that have been passed through for that just-completed hour (we use different-colored pens to track the folders every different hour) and (and not to get into the weeds with our work) check on our software that every single form in every single folder for that hour is complete.  It just so happens that this clipboard sits right next to me.  The person who "checks the board" should get up and get the clipboard shortly after the top of every hour.  But sometimes that person, who sits several seats down to the right of me, either loses track of time or is busy going through and "sanitizing" the folders.  So what I often do is get up, grab the board and lay it next to her.  It's an excuse to stretch.

Earlier this week, several minutes after the top of, I think, 10 in the morning, I got up and handed off the board.  And the person who was checking it that day said, "I already checked it!"  And then she said, "You already gave the board to me!"

"Really?" I replied.

"Yeah.  You gave it to me, like, a few minutes ago."

On the form there are lines to write down how many folders we finish each hour, and they're marked "6-7," 12-1," etc.  The line for "9-10" was filled; she already added up the number of folders done for the hour.  And yet I swear, I swear, that I looked at the clock, looked at that line, saw it was filled in, and thought to myself, "Oh!  The board for the past hour hasn't been checked yet!"  Worse than that, and worst of all?  I don't remember getting up to give her the board prior to this second time.  And I still don't recall giving her the board.

Foggy brain, man.  It's COVID, man, it's COVID. ...

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -3).  After a worrying, humbling sweep at home at the hands of unranked Notre Dame, it was important for the U. male icers to get back on track.  They did last week, and how: They swept Arizona St. at Mariucci Thursday and Friday by scores of 10-0 and 10-2.  Now, the Sun Devils aren't really the 1980s Edmonton Oilers.  But it nonetheless was important to pocket wins, and with these two they maintain a ranking of fourth in both polls and remain on the inside when it comes to the PairWise.  Mainly for the crushing wins, I have elevated this team up to Positive Numbers.

This squad is at Ohio St. tonight/Friday evening and tomorrow/Saturday afternoon.

#0: Gopher volleyball (Re-Entry!).  Finally, the Big Ten begins play in women's volleyball.  Like with most other sports, the league is playing only against each other, and similar to what the NBA and NHL are doing in response to the pandemic, the league is also going to play college hockey-style, with a pair of Games against the same opponent over two days.  So the Gophers began last weekend with a sweep of Michigan St. at Maturi.  They thus maintain their #7 ranking on the AVCA Top 25, and thus, I am going to put them at 0.  They are in Maryland tonight/Friday night and tomorrow/Saturday evening.

#-1: Whitecaps (Re-Entry!).  Have to admit that the National Women's Hockey League snuck up on me.  And like a cat burglar, it'll be gone before we know it.  The NWHL "season" is a bubble in Lake Placid, N.Y., the six teams will play each other round-robin style only once before having one-Game Semifinals and Final.  This will all wrap up a week-and-a-half from now.

Under such a format, the 'Caps have picked up where they left off, which was preparing to play for last Year's Isobel Cup Final vs. the Boston Pride before the pandemic hit and, unfortunately, the league decided to scuttle the title Game.  They began Saturday with a 2-1, come-from-behind victory over the Pride.  Then, the Whitecaps roared back from a 5-1 deficit to beat the expansion club Toronto Six (stupid-ass name, by the way) in a Shootout on Sunday.  Then on Tuesday, Minnesota's Haley Mack scored on a 5-on-3 Power Play with ten Seconds left in regulation to beat the Metropolitan Riveters, 1-0.  They thus are the only team in the six-team league that is undefeated.

They were supposed to play yesterday/Thursday.  But the league postponed all the Games because the Riveters have an outbreak of coronavirus cases.  In fact, it was announced that the entire club has pulled out of the quasi-tournament.  This pullout stands out because, unlike teams in the NWSL and MLS, apparently this breakout began once Games began, and under the assumption that players were only congregating with each other.  If that's not the case, well, these Rivs done fucked up, because they fucked up the schedule for the rest of the league.

I unfairly would dock the Whitecaps for this coronavirus-related postponement.  But unfortunately it gets worse than that.  I have just made myself aware of a coordinated online attack orchestrated by the alt-right sports section, also known as Barstool Sports.  Earlier in the Week, the CEO of this sports ... thing tweeted her support of the NWHL, which she has done from time to time.  That brought up critics who say that the league should not attract the support of someone leading a company that promotes racism, sexism and online harassment of journalists.  To which the CEO tweeted about her being a victim ... and then naming those critics and journalists so Republican trolls can harass them online.  It gets worse.  Saroya Tinker, a Rookie Defenseman for the Riveters, clapped back at the CEO.  To which the founder of Barstool tweeted that Tinker should be in jail, which set off another round of online attacks against Tinker.

What really gets me is that this Republican hate group (seriously, I don't know how Barstool hasn't teamed up, or even been bought out by, Breitbart yet) has support from many in the NWHL.  Several players have showed on the CEO's podcasts.  After her quasi-doxxing tweet a player, Kelly Babstock, retweeted several of the CEO's tweets.  Babstock is a teammate of Tinker.  Later in the week, a director of hockey operations named Gabrielle Gjelaj tweeted her own words defending the CEO, bemoaning cancel culture, and outright ignoring the entire controversy, including the harassment of Saroya Tinker, a member of the Riverters ... for whom Gjelaj is the director of hockey operations.  Talk about an inside job.  For the league's part, they put out a statement that is half-ass.  Goddamn, they are thirsty for that Barstool attention, even if it fuels the fire of this controversy.  Anyway, this breakdown on Defector (formed by the writers of Deadspin, an online publication that I have not totally liked, but has frequently taken down Barstool) is fantastic.

Even though I have no evidence beyond this, enough of a shitstorm has been created that I have to toss some of this on the Whitecaps.  I have to think that at least several players on the club love Barstool -- a few of them probably are stars, even.  The founding and growth of a women's pro league is by its very definition progressive, and therefore I will attest that the NWHL has a duty to reject any support from regressive, pro-stupid, Republican groups like Barstool.  The league has not, at least not genuinely, and many of its players are siding with this hate group and against progress, and some of its own players.  This has the potential to destroy the league ... and if the powers that choose not to be on the right side, then they deserve to die.

So yeah, that's why I've ranked the Whitecaps -1.  They're supposed to play the Buffalo Beauts on Saturday, then after that, who knows?

#-2: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -1).  I don't think it matters since it's too late, but this squad has won three Games in a row.  Apparently Head Coach Lindsay Whalen lit into the team (I assume it was after the Third Quarter, after they got outscored in that Quarter, 21-12, and thus was trailing by seven) and her players responded by doubling up Penn St. in the Fourth, 32-16, and thus claimed the road victory Monday, 85-76.  They then followed that up by outlasting Purdue at Williams yesterday/Thursday afternoon, 77-72.  This week the U. hosts Iowa and visits Michigan.

#-3: Wild (Last Week: -2).  A 2-2 screening Week -- splitting two-Game series with San Jose and Los Angeles at home.  An early storyline emerging with this team is their lack of production on the Power Play.  However, highlight efforts by Kirill Kaprizov and Kevin Fiala show offensive talent on the Wild for the first time in a long time.  

#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5).  It was possible that this past Week could have been the last Week Ryan Saunders was in charge of the Woofie Dogs.  He avoided being fired -- barely, I assume -- with a surprising 120-110 victory at home over New Orleans Saturday night.  Once again they were without the services of Karl-Anthony Towns (still battling COVID-19) and D'Angelo Russell (quad, but also "load management"), but they somehow rocked the Pels.  Of course, that win was surrounded by somnambulant losses at Target Center to Atlanta and back-to-back defeats at Golden State.  Moribund remains the apt descriptor for this franchise.  This Week: Home vs. Philadelphia tonight/Friday night, a back-to-back home-and-home with Cleveland Sunday and Monday, and at San Antonio Wednesday.

#-5: Gopher wrestling (Last Week: 0).  Home Dual versus Iowa last Friday was going to be a massacre, and it was: 35-4.  The only Points came courtesy of Heavyweight and #1 in that class, Gable Steveson, who took a Major Decision over the third-ranked Heavyweight, Tony Cassioppi, 14-6.  Otherwise, the Hawkeyes got a pin (at 125; the top-ranked rassler in that class felled #9, Gopher Patrick McKee two Minutes into the Match), a Technical Fall, and three Major Decisions.  Sunday they will participate in the second of two "tri-Meets" where, in Piscataway, N.J., they will face Purdue and then Rutgers.

#-6: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: Positive Numbers).  I thought that this club was good enough to shore up their already lofty resume with wins on the road vs. teams that are not the class of the B1G.  I did not think I would have to worry about the direct opposite -- losing to bad league teams at home.  But that's what happened Saturday afternoon, when the Goofers fell behind early and never was able to get it together in a humiliating 63-49 defeat at the hands of Maryland.  I will assume this is a blip on the road to The Big Dance, but this team right now is 4-5 in-conference.  Plus, they have to go on the road this screening Week to play Purdue tomorrow/Saturday night and Rutgers Thursday night.  Be careful; a winless week will undermine the CV lots.

My Three Naps

I don't really remember when it started happening.  I just did it, I did it for a while, and then it became a pattern and ... by the time I noticed what I have done, it seems to me I've done it for years.

I have long taken a nap for lunch at work.  I absolutely need it.  Not to complain too much about my job, partially because I could get through it if I routinely got a good night's sleep, and I routinely don't.  But more often than not, once I slip into the passenger seat and (for the wintertime; I need to open the windows during the summertime) get the blanket on top of me, I am able to power nap, and that refreshes me to get through the afternoon.  Not getting enough sleep overnight helps me conk off for lunchtime.  I am able to get through the afternoon without slipping into unconsciousness, but I don't know how.  It really is my second wind.  And I am exceedingly happy because I feel so energized from that nap.

But this is where the "I started doing this and before I knew it I've been doing it for a while!" part of this blog post comes in.  I now take naps in the evening on a regular basis.  I actually don't remember the last evening when I didn't do it.  Maybe on a Saturday because I get to sleep in and that destroys the cycle of when my body gets tired.  Anyway, while that lunchtime nap is invigorating, it doesn't get me that much energy into the evening.  In fact, lately at least, once I come home and (usually) immediately have dinner with my parents, I am tired to the point whereby I can sleep.  Sometimes I stay up to doomscroll, and sometimes I am able to sneak in a shower.  But at some point between, say, 5:30 and 7:30, my body tells me to rest, and I do.  My shortest evening nap has been around 30 minutes and my longest, such as the one I got in just this past evening, was about 3 1/2 hours, but I usually average around two, 2 1/2 hours for this nap this part of the day.

It feels great to sleep.  I feel productive once I wake up at night, which is invaluable.  But it does ruin a lot of my plans.  The obvious ramification, of course, is that my sleep cycle is all screwed up.  I usually stay up till 2 anyway, but getting a lot of sleep in the evening doesn't give me a lot of time to sneak in some rest just before I have to wake up in the morning -- which necessitates the lunchtime nap.  Also, there are a lot of things I could be doing in the evening that I obviously don't do.  I could be straightening out my bedroom.  I could be catching up on expenses to write down in my day planner.  I could send out invitations to fellow alumni in the area.  (This is something I should do after I blog post this.)  And, in particular, last night I really, really wanted to watch the situation comedies on ABC.  The Goldbergs is a very funny show, folks!  I wasn't been able to watch that and the other shows in that powerhouse lineup because I slept through it.  And I think I have slept through it the past several Wednesdays, which makes me wonder for how long I have done these evening naps.

So I sleep for, like, 20 minutes at lunchtime ... then sleep for 2 1/2 hours in the evening ... and then, if I'm lucky, I sleep for three hours overnight before work.  I think I can function as a normal human being on six hours of sleep.  I just don't know if it's healthy for me in the long run that I get those six hours all chopped up like this every single day and night.  Maybe once this pandemic ends and I have a reason to stay up in the evening I can readjust my sleep schedule to one that looks normal.  Until then ... can I get along like this?  Maybe I have done so for a long time and I don't even realize it!

Life In The Pandemic Now

I think I should take my temperature, figuratively, about how I'm feeling right now about living under pandemic rules, just over a year since the first cases of COVID-19 reached the United States.

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I have to admit that I still have an urge to go out and do things in the evening, even though that ebbs and flows.  The main thing I want to do is go to the gym and work out, because damn, I am fat.  It also would get me out of this rut of taking naps in the evening, which I should blog post about in the future.  Having said that, and having said what I'm about to say before on WAF (at least I think), staying home has meant that I am saving money at a rate I have never done before and in fact could not even imagine before the pandemic hit.  Normally I would be hemorrhaging money hand over fist going to coffeeshops and stripper parties.  That is not happening, and although I am bored as hell, I am very, very happy at the money I am saving.

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The plans seem half-ass, and following through on them looks to very difficult right now.  But a couple weeks ago, the state finally rolled out a plan to start vaccinating old people regardless of co-morbidities -- a cohort that includes my parents.  Last Tuesday they were told by the Minnesota Department of Health to sign up for a vaccination online (or over the phone) starting at noon -- first-come, first-served.  And of course the damn website crashed.  I came home from work and Mother ushered me to her laptop, where the MDH website told her she was in a virtual waiting room and that she should send information about what my parents want (uh ... a shot?) in an e-mail.  I sent photos of their identification and insurance (even though insurance is not necessary) after some trouble (my fault, not of that of the website) and the department e-mailed them saying they've been waitlisted.

As fair as that may theoretically sound, the shitstorm in the wake of hundreds of thousands seeing that same webpage forced MDH to change their system to a lottery one, whereby everyone who signs up between 5 a.m. yesterday (Tuesday) and 5 a.m. today (Wednesday) will be eligible to get a shot which will be determined and then announced to the winners later today -- and, unlike last week, at a location of their choosing.  (There was one story where a person who lived just outstate but came to stay with relatives in my town in anticipation of trying to get a vaccine receiving a slot way up north.  She and a relative drove up there to get it.)  MDH said that is people were waitlisted last week, like my parents, they were already entered into this pool.  I think they signed up anyway.  Good choice, because you never know if that is really true.  Wish them luck!

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My folks getting the vaccine is the light at the end of the tunnel.  I have heard that even if we all get the shots, things cannot markedly change.  We should still wear masks and stay away from each other, etc.  But I'll be honest: If I get the shot, and everyone I love get a shot, and after that there are strangers around me who refuse to get a shot, what the fuck do I care?  I'm as immune as can be!  If they refuse to get something that will prevent them from possibly succumbing to this disease, why should I care about their well-being?  I'm ready to rip off my mask, cough in front of people and, in fact, frot total strangers a week after my second shot.  Because things will be back to normal!  And if I pass along the virus to another person and they get sick ... shit, it's their fault!  That's truly how I feel.

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Even though vaccines might not be coming along as quickly as we all hope, there are some supplies that seem to be fine now.  I remember back in the early days of the pandemic where everybody was freaking out because everybody bought antibacterial wipes, hand sanitizer and toilet paper.  The first two I get; toilet paper, to this day, is a thing I don't understand why people felt the need to hoard.  I once was told by my parents to get a bag of toilet paper from a Menards because it was on sale, even though we had plenty because they bogarted a whole shipment months prior.

The supply chains for those three items seem to have righted themselves in the past several months.  I see as much toilet paper as we need since the fall.  And since some time in the winter it seems as though there are now plenty of hand sanitizer and wipes.  For a while, I had been making semi-regular trips to Target to see if I could find both items, and I couldn't.  But then, I began seeing sanitizer more regularly, and then some weeks later, the shelves for wipes have been completely and consistently stocked.  I used to worry, in particular, that I wouldn't have enough wipes for work.  Now, I have several cans of them in my closet, and if I need to buy more, I think I can just swing by Target to get them whenever I want.  There are no shortages of those items, and really anything, anymore.

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I have swung back to being an ascetic when it comes to screwing around, partly because I feel as though I can hold out a little longer while my parents are close to beginning their shot regimens, partly because these new variants, which they say may be more contagious, is scaring the shit out of me.

I haven't been with someone in a couple weeks, when I got that impromptu massage from ******a when I got cut early from work.  And I haven't had full-blown sexual activity in at least a couple months.  I have gotten used to it.  My libido isn't as raring as it used to be.  I figured that I would be, well, itching to rock out with my cock out after not doing it in so long.  But while I rub one off from time to time, I really think that not seeing naked women do shit to me has dampened my sex drive to the point where I can't mentally and physically get it up.  Again, I think that's a good thing to prevent me from catching the virus.  But I think that once this is all over, I assumed I could just resume my fucking around, and the way it looks and feels now, I'm not sure that I need it anymore.  Is that growing up, or growing old?

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Back when all this began, experts said we would be in this at least a year, and most likely 18 months.  Experts now are pushing that timeline to the fall, if not the end of the year.  But I want to hope that the Biden administration is going to hammer a coherent, competent national vaccine plan together.

For that reason, I am going to remain somewhat optimistic that things will (largely) get back to normal in that 18-month prognostication.  In fact, I'll make a prediction.  For the symbolism itself, I will say that the United States will largely get out of this pandemic by the Fourth of July.  And if you want a stretch goal, why not shoot for Memorial Weekend?  Maybe I'm being too rosy, but could the vast majority of adults get their shots in the spring?  I really can't see why not -- if we want that to happen.

I Became A Trash Panda At Work Tonight

I was working second shift Monday; got home just now.  I want to treat myself for this shift because there's no one around and I get to relax because I don't feel the pressure of deadlines and stuff.  Oftentimes I get a sandwich, and I did this time, going to Jersey Mike's.  And I brought a Vanilla Coke with me, which I bought earlier in the day after getting tested for COVID-19 and had drank some of with the White Castle I bought for my first lunch (notes: I had WC because T-Mobile gave me five bucks off, and the second lunch was at home and was a big plate of spaghetti).

I threw my food in the work refrigerator and I planned on having "dinner" more than halfway through my shift.  I come back out to get a swig of the Coke ... and I didn't see it there.  Then I remembered: Mondays the cleaning crew comes through and, around 5 p.m., they clean out all the contents of one of two fridges in each of the two break rooms in the building I work in.  There are signs on the door of the fridge that will be cleaned out that upcoming Monday.  And the fridge I threw my stuff in apparently was the one that was getting cleaned out this Monday.  Want to be pissed, but I can't blame anybody.  This was all my fault (although, and I'm just saying this, there was a bottle of store-bought cold brew that was still in the fridge that I remembered was there when I stopped by earlier to take a swig of my Vanilla Coke -- so why didn't the cleaning crew toss that bottle, but still, all my fault).

I could have let it go.  Nah!  Jersey Mike's is hella expensive.  I paid, like, six-and-a-half bucks for their small sub.  I want that back!  So I hunted down the cleaning crew, and after going back to the first person I encountered, she said that she threw all the food in the fridge into a bag, and then that bag into the trash receptacle next to the recycling bin.

OK, so it must be done.  I knew there might be people who could see me and thus judge me on what I was going to do, but I was going to do it, and if they see and judge, so be it.  I went into the break room, opened up the lid of that trash can (for the second time, actually; the first time I looked in but didn't have the heart to do more than that) and pulled out a bag.  It was my bag.  And after tossing aside a couple empty food containers, I saw my Jersey Mike's sub, still in the bag.  (I also saw my cup from the Hawaiian ice vendor from whom I bought a cup of ice at a parking lot at Maplewood Mall over the summer.  They said that if I kept the cup and brought it back for another ice, for example at the Minnesota State Fair, where they're a vendor, I could get some bucks knocked off.  That seems kind of silly, keeping around a plastic container until the Fair rolls around, and seeing it touched by actual trash convinced me to take both that cup and that bag home and throw them into our recycling bin.)

You goddamn right I fished it out of the bag.  And you goddamn right I ate it.  I made sure I washed my hands after I opened up the bag and then opened the wrapper in which the sub was rolled, though.  And I smelled the sub, too -- and I couldn't detect a whiff of trash smell.  Now, I'm no aficionado.  Maybe people slag on Jersey Mike's.  But I have always liked them, and frankly, eating that sandwich last night made me so glad that I looked for it and that I took it out of the trash to eat, because last night, Jersey Mike's tasted sooooooooooooo goooooooooooooooood.  No regrets ... assuming I don't get sick from going through trash.

---

Aside: I was lucky to have found my sub in the trash.  The four-person cleaning crew split up to cover the whole building.  One couple tosses the fridge's contents into the trash can; the second takes the trash from the can to the dumpster in the back of the building.  Usually it goes in that order.  Last night, for some reason, they did it the other way.  So, in a sense, I was lucky, because that sub should have gone to the dumpster.

And I will confess: If they had told me that my sub was in the dumpster, I would have asked them if I could go to the dumpster to see if I could get it out of there.  Fucking Christ, I spent six-and-a-half bucks for it!!!

---

Oh, speaking of the Vanilla Coke: I didn't see it in the bag.  So, naturally, I looked in the recycling bin right next to the trash receptacle.  And on top there were two empty bottles.  One of them was Vanilla Coke.  The other was Cherry Vanilla Coke, and I brought with me, in the plastic bag, a bottle of Cherry Vanilla Coke that I had finished while at WC (I had the Cherry Vanilla, I bought the Vanilla, I went to the Castle, I drank the rest of the Cherry Vanilla, and I started drinking some of the Vanilla).

I grabbed them out of the bin.  This was around the time where I noticed someone walking across the break room.  I wouldn't have minded anyway, like I said, but I don't think anyone saw me as I dove through the trash bin, and thank Buddha for that, because the recycling bin is a bit ... cleaner than the garbage can, right?

I planned on scanning the codes underneath the caps of both Cokes as soon as I got done drinking all of the Vanilla (I didn't have time to do the one underneath the Cherry Vanilla before I had to go to work).  But since both were empty, and I already had decided I was going to take the bag and the Hawaiian ice cup home to recycle, I figured I should take some stuff off my hands, scan the codes for both Cokes at work, and then, ironically, throw them back into the recycling bin.

I planned on doing those scans during my second break after I ate the sub.  I looked at both Cokes, both of which still had caps screwed on them.  The guy who cleaned out the fridge dumped the contents of the Vanilla Coke into the sink, most likely.  However, there was a miniscule, miniscule amount of Coke in both bottles.  Now, I was thinking the first part of my night at work at how fat I felt.  It probably was due to the White Castle and the spaghetti serving as my lunches.  But drinking Coke virtually daily isn't good for my health, either, and with every swig I took yesterday I could feel my waistline expanding.

And yet, I felt kind of screwed that the, oh, half-bottle of Vanilla Coke went down the drain.  That's, like, $1.15 that was wasted.  (Again, I'm not blaming the cleaning guy; this was my fault for not putting my stuff in the refrigerator that wasn't going to be cleaned last evening.)  Plus, you know the adage that you don't know what you got till it's gone?  My ballooning stomach due to the sugar in the Cokes was the farthest thing from my mind.  I.  Needed.  Coke.  So you goddamn right I went bottoms up on both Cokes in order to consume every last milliliter!  Who cares, the liquid didn't touch the recyclables!

Mole In The Resistance?

For the first time in a long time, the Resistance over the alumni clubs met.  It was convened by someone I would call a "shadow figure."  He says he cannot be a conspicuous figurehead for the group, but besides that he is an extremely active, and vocal, member of our group.  In fact, I have sometimes chafed over both his opinions and attitude -- at times -- knowing that he has not put his face and reputation on the line by actively engaging with the other side in our attempts to broach some sort of compromise.  He has his reasons; nonetheless, I think we need to assert our side a little more -- at times -- because we are the ones doing the dirty work.  (With that said, I need to point out that lately he has been more cognizant of his position in this group.  He still has questions and wants to contribute, but he did say that he asks those questions and volunteers his time and effort even though "he isn't there."  A little self-awareness is all I ask.)

And I am digressing.  The point of this blog post is that, after this Zoom meeting, I went over to what was once my alumni club's Facebook page.  It is still there, but now it is co-administered, and thus co-moderated, by members of the alumni association.  This was done before the decision over the summer to kill off all domestic alumni clubs.  When that happened, we were told that officials with that department would take a more visible role in social media platforms.  In, well, taking over our Facebook page, for example (even though I still was allowed to remain as an administrator and moderator), I was led to believe they would post more.  It might be articles touting the university, propaganda as such, but, well, I didn't think I had much of a choice.  (Even though I did -- I might get to blog posting about that some other time.)

That increased publishing hasn't happened.  I think some person I do not know posted two links to which members could sign up for some study of some sort.  But since this change began, no one from that association has posted anything.  I, however, have, and still have.  I could have, and maybe should have, taken this stupid decision as a reason to walk away from doing anything connected with my alma mater.  But I can't quit it.  So I am staying and fighting.  And I am occasionally publishing stuff on the football team and news about my alma mater and surrounding Los Angeles County.

So back to last night.  I posted on Facebook a death about a member of the football team (he was with them in the eighties) last night, just before the meeting.  I check back later ... and that post was liked or "reacted" (and if he did "react," he gave the sad emoji since the post concerned a death) by the head of my alma mater's alumni association.  It is the first time I have seen him lurking around our Facebook page.  Moreover, he liked my previous post about a five-star recruit committing to my alma mater.

Yes, this may just be coincidence.  Nonetheless, I'm freaking out.  The night we huddle together for a meeting, and then this guy, who all of us consider to be cutthroat and Machiavellian, just starts to come around my way and liking my posts?  I understand I might be looking a tad paranoid, but I'm not.  I'm really concerned.  I'm really concerned he choose to, well, pick on me because we're meeting again.  This is not some innocent gesture of solidarity.  He's probing for weaknesses.  He's playing mind games.  And ... no joke, I think someone from the meeting tipped him off that we were meeting.  This leader of the association was tipped off by this meeting by an apparent mole, and he decided, of all the people in The Resistance to fuck around with, he settled on me.  Don't know why.  And goddamn, I don't know what he wants.

And also -- WHO'S THE MOLE?

I Hate Grapefruit Juice!

I need to state that here because I have, on occasion, bought it, even though the bitter/rancid taste is seared indelibly in my mind.  I now buy juice on the regular in case I am thirsty at night.  I bounce around flavors and brands, but about a week ago I wanted to drink healthy.  Have you noticed that all fruit juices have a high amount of sugar?  It's incredible!  And I have not been able to find one that doesn't have tons of it in the carton or bottle.

So, if I recall how my thinking went, I took a crack on searching "healthiest fruit juices" on Google.  I don't remember clearly the list on the link I selected, but I think, when I was staring at the refrigerated shelves at Target, I thought that grapefruit juice was one of the top choices.  (Here is the list: Grapefruit juice comes in at #9.)  So I bought it, totally forgetting why I hate it.

So I made a point of drinking as much of it as fast as possible.  That is difficult, given how terrible it tastes.  But I drank it all up yesterday, and in anticipation of doing so, I stopped by Target on my way home to buy something I would enjoy drinking -- well, at least I think: Pineapple, orange and banana.  That's a Frankenstein fruit concoction, but I like eating those fruits separately, so maybe they won't be so bad together.  Drinking that hopefully removes the taste of bleepin' grapefruit from my mouth.  My goodness, I will never drink grapefruit juice again, no matter how healthy it is.

No, No, Yay, No With The Mechanic Around The Corner

So I figured I should nip that thing with the bent valve stem core whatever sooner rather than later.  I had all of Friday off, and I had dreams of going to the Mall Of America and maybe buying some Doc Martens as an heir apparent to my diseased ones, but after thinking about when I could go out, it made too much sense to get this tire thing checked out Friday.  Any repair, however long, could get done that day, and however much of the rest of the day I would have, I would have that, and all the days after, free from the stress of wondering what's going on with that valve stem core thingy.

Thursday afternoon I made an appointment.  I went in.  And the first thing I noticed, while the service tech was dealing with an old guy who was borrowing the loaner of The Mechanic Around The Corner, is that no one was wearing a mask.  Not the service tech, not this old guy, not the cashier.  No one.  Fuck.  (This is the first "No" in the title of the blog post.)  I did not want to be confronted with ... such an issue.  I thought about backing out, but that would not have done me any good.  Nevertheless, the anxiety of being trapped with no one giving two shits about contracting the coronavirus "encouraged" me to wait outside.  Thank goodness the sun was shining, otherwise ten degrees would have felt exactly like ten degrees.  (Oh, I also thought about picking up Kentucky Fried Chicken, for which I had a coupon that expired that day, before going to the repair shop, but I thought I shouldn't be late.  Turns out that was the smart thing; I was going to eat it inside, but I sure as hell wasn't going to do that if a bunch of fucking anti-maskers.)

What was worse was that it took about an hour from the time I got to the shop before I could leave (second "No").  That wouldn't be a bad thing, except that this issue -- unless they, like, tore the entire valve off of the tire and I needed to get a new one -- should have taken only a half-hour.  I think the service tech said that they didn't have a bay open for a while because, I guess, they got backed up or something.

The good news was that as soon as a bay did get open and they drove my car in to look at the valve stem core thingamabobber, I think it took ten minutes for them to see that it was bent, to take out the valve stem core, and replace it with one that the tech said was bigger but would seal to ensure that the tire sensor would not be set off.  The tech threw it in the trash, but he fished it out for me to see that the notch indeed was bent, probably from the air hose I clamped on it on Monday.  Moreover, it was $15.  He said that if I went somewhere else, I'd be charged $100 for a brand new sensor.  I believe them.  They're anti-maskers, but I believe them.  (The "Yay.")

So I pay.  And I give the cashier a coupon I got, knocking off ten bucks for any repair.  But then she's all, "Nope!" and I go, what do you mean, and she (third "No") ... well, I don't know what she fuckin' said.  I think she just continued to say no.  And I had no idea what to do because she kind of had me over a barrel.  I mean, I couldn't just walk out without paying.  And so what if it's only fifteen bucks?  These fucking people send me coupons all the time, and now that I want to use one, I can't use it?  Then don't fucking send me your junk mail anymore!  And I checked the coupon Friday night in case there was a reason I couldn't use it, but there wasn't.  Should've paid only five bucks for that, goddammit. ...

Oh -- while I was waiting, I bought MegaMillions tickets for my sister, and I used the winnings from a previous MegaMillions drawing I bought for her to defray the cost of this one.  And I swear to fucking God, I can't find it.  I don't know where the hell it is.  And now I figure that this cashier is a bitch who secretly thinks she's better than me because I was wearing a mask and she wasn't.  And so I think I left the tickets I bought on the counter, and she didn't bother even telling me that I forgot.  That's how much she loathes me.  Isn't it obvious?

I thought about going on Yelp to complain about all I encountered and saw at The Mechanic Around The Corner.  I might wait to make sure they don't know it's me.  But I'm still thinking about it.  And in the meantime I'll need to get tested once again.  And I'll need to find this goddamn lottery ticket.

Things Fall Apart, A Three-Part Series -- Part III: My Left Shoe Looks Like It's Infected

I get my Doc Martens polished once a month in downtown Minneapolis.  The person who shines them is really nice, and I plan on visiting her monthly until The End Times.

I have had these Docs for several years now.  I remember ordering them through an e-mail sent by American Express for, I think, one of its partners or affiliates.  I had thought about ordering them for a long time, and once I did, I kept them in the box for ... I want to say, no joke, up to two years.  I wanted them, but I didn't need to use them right away, not when I had other shoes that I hadn't used up yet.  But it was nice to know my shoes-in-waiting were already ready for me to break them out when the time came.

There was a noticeable breaking-in period, its manifestation coming in the form of the right shoe rubbing up against my right pinky toe so bad that the only way I could prevent that toe from being permanently bruised was to let its toenail grow and grow to the point where it's now a ... well, the only way I can describe it is a "growth."  Maybe that wasn't necessary, and that I just needed to wear my boots enough times to where it would form around my feet.  But that pinky toenail is so big and gangly now that I might need either professional help or a sander to properly cut my toe to its proper length -- and width.

Beyond that, I felt like a man wearing them.  The steel toes made me feel protected, like I could kick ass and defend myself if I needed to (even though I read in a couple chatrooms a couple nights ago that the best footwear to wear for self-defense is sneakers, so you'll be faster when you run away).  My Father kept insisting that these shoes were too heavy to be comfortable, and he had been buying for me a bunch of other shoes to wear instead.  I wear them -- sometimes.  But I always go back to my Doc's.

However, I might have to retire and part with them soon.  Another thing I locked about those shoes were their durability.  I have worn them for -- shoot, if I recollect correctly about how long I stored them, it's only been 4 1/2 years, which actually doesn't seem to be a long time.  Anyway, I noticed that there was a crack that went all the way through the bottom, or the outsole, of the left foot.  I also noticed that, especially during the winter, there would sometimes be some white frost that would collect on a part of my left shoe.  My shoeshiner said was salt from the chemicals treated the snow, and she would use rosewater and/or vinegar to get it out, and it would be gone, at least for a while.

That did not happen last month, the last time I got my Doc Marten steel-toed boots shined.  My shiner did an excellent job.  But at night, well after I got home, I went downstairs and on my way down I looked at my boots and saw that this white frost, isolated to one part of my left shoe in the past, had now spread to pretty much my whole shoe.  This, well, metastasizing cancer wowed me in time as well as in scope; before it took at least a day before the salt began to re-infect that shoe, and now it was mere hours.

I took a closer look at the bottom of that shoe.  That crack stretched all the way from one side of the foot to the other, so it looks like that shoe was being cut like a cake.  One day at work I took off that shoe my insole to combat flat feet.  The top of the insole was wet, but even though I suspected it, the crack I saw on the bottom did not cleave through into the top.  Still, the wetness is an indication that something is getting in there; I have noticed that my left sock is more damp than my right one.  I don't immediately feel moisture when, for example, I walk on snow.  But air and moisture are getting up in there, and that makes me believe that that infiltration is spreading salt, first to one part and then the entirety of the shoe.  Well, either it's that or the crack from the outsole has ripped apart the insides of the whole shoe, and that white frost is an indication that the outside of the shoe is so disconnected from the rest of the shoe that it just gets cold with no warmth from my foot reaching it.

Whatever the machination, I think these boots are on their last legs.  I don't think my left shoe is going to immediately fall apart while I'm walking.  But it's high time I buy another pair of Docs -- I thought about getting Red Wings, but I still have black shoelaces and black shoe polish that are both meant for Doc Martens -- and stash it in case that left shoe becomes impossible to keep wearing.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -5).  This is a rare week where I need to get away from just looking at records for each team for the Week.  The University of Minnesota wrestlers went 2-0 while the U. men's basketball team went 1-0.  Moreover, they were supposed to play the Cornhuskers in Lincoln Wednesday, but that was postponed because Nebraska has suffered at least one positive COVID-19 test among either its roster, coaching ranks or important staff.  While I have hit a Minnesota club for postponements if they were the ones with the positives, if I were honest with myself, I used the postponement in general as a reason to mark them down, especially if I need to break a tie.

However, that squad's only Game, and win, was no ordinary Game and win.  They beat Michigan at Williams Saturday afternoon.  This is no run-of-the-mill Wolverine club; the Golden Gophers gave them their first loss of their season, and they were ranked seventh in the country.  And they didn't just beat the Wolverines; Minnesota crushed Michigan, 75-57.  It was the Wolverines' smallest point total of their Year, and Minnesota induced 20 Michigan Turnovers.  As Marcus Carr has been a stalwart, Drake transfer Liam Robbins has been a revelation.  He has been great throughout the Year and was able to make up for a bad first performance versus Michigan (a 25-Point Gopher loss on the 6th) with 22 Points and eight Rebounds.

Yes, this was at home, and the Gophers have been perfect at home and winless on the road.  Like I have said before, I think that's a sign of how good the Big Ten is as a conference, even without crowds.  I think good teams in this league will play great at home and will probably be blown out on the road.  I am now convinced that Richard Pitino has assembled a good, even a very good, team.

So the U. finally have finished its gauntlet to begin its conference slate -- according to the Minnesota athletic department, the most consecutive lineup of opponents in the Associated Press Top 25, seven, since St. John's had to face eight in a row in 2011.  And they finished it 4-3, winning all their Games at home and losing (actually getting drubbed) all the ones away from Dinkytown.  I thought they were going to go 0-7.  Now, they're ensconced as a 6-seed according to Joe Lunardi.  That is one hell of an accomplishment, and that is why I rank the University of Minnesota men's basketball squad first this Week.

Now is the part of the schedule where the Gophers can begin winning on the road against lesser foes in the B1G, an important part to building a comprehensive resume for tournament play.  But first, well, is a home Game (fingers crossed it goes off without a hitch) vs. Maryland Saturday afternoon.

#0: Gopher wrestling (Last Week: -6).  Wrestling is doing its part to stem the spread of the coronavirus by hosting more neutral-site Duals and Doubleheaders.  For example, on Saturday, the Golden Gophers went to East Lansing to play both Michigan St. and Maryland.  And the grapplers had a triumphant day, blanking the Terrapins, 48-0, and then crushed the Spartans, 28-6.  I don't think it matters in the long run -- this club faces certain slaughter tonight/Friday night against Iowa, and the Hawkeyes are coming here.  But a dominant double-dip should be honored, and so for this week's WMNSS, I made a compromise and pushed up this team to above negative numbers.  (And again, referring back to the U. men's b-ballers, I thus put them in Positive Numbers despite losing a Game due to COVID, even if that postponement is not their fault.)

#-1: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -7).  Similarly to the U. wrestlers, I want to give some extra recognition to the women b-ballers, who beat Nebraska in Lincoln Tuesday afternoon, 76-71, managing to end a three-Game losing streak.  This club is 3-7 and there remain growing problems with the program, which probably makes such good screening Weeks rare.  So, in an act of charity, I wanted to push these women up as much as possible (although not past the wrestlers because, hey, this team won only once and they won twice, and on the same day!) knowing that they visit Penn St. Monday evening and host Purdue Thursday afternoon and it is highly unlikely they'll get out of next week with a three-Game winning streak.

#-2: Wild (Last Week: -1).  Sandwiching their first loss of the Year, a 1-0 decision in Anaheim Monday, between a 4-3 Overtime win over Los Angeles Saturday and a 3-2 victory at the Ducks Wednesday.  That victory over the Kings was the very definition of a great escape.  Down 3-1, Matt Dumba tied the Game with about two Seconds left in the Third Period to send the Game to OT.  Then, Marcus Johannson completed the comeback by scoring for the first time this season with 10.6 Seconds left in the extra frame to escape L. A. with both Points.  Meanwhile, Joel Eriksson Ek's Goal about two Minutes into the Third Period was the Game-winner vs. the Ducks despite blowing a 2-0 lead.

The secondary Assist on Ek's tally, by the way, was given to Kirill Kaprizov, who now has four Points on the young season.  That's great output.  But is one concerned that neither Zach Parise nor Kevin Fiala have even registered an Assist yet?

After starting out in Southern California to start their season, Minnesota now comes back home to begin a lengthy homestand.  They will play four Games this Week, every other Day -- San Jose for two, then the Kings for two.

#-3: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -3).  It is unusual for the two U. hockey teams to have worse Weeks than the two U. basketball teams, but this is one of those Weeks.  The men's icers could not sustain success and their #1 ranking in both men's college hockey polls after getting swept, at home, by Notre Dame, which wasn't ranked last week.  The Gophers, now fourth in both polls, took their humiliation out on Arizona St. last/Thursday night at Mariucci by immolating the shit out of the Sun Devils, 10-0.

They close out their series against ASU this/Friday afternoon.  And looking ahead at the rest of the schedule, it looks like this series vs. the Sun Devils will be the last one that is played on days besides the traditional Friday-Saturday.  Finally, a return to normalcy!

#-4: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -2).  Alas, the schedule does not provide succor for the female icers as it does for the men.  A 6-3 defeat in Madison meant this squad was swept by Wisconsin last weekend, and so they swapped back #1 and #2 rankings in the USCHO.com poll.  They visit Ohio St. for two this/Friday evening and tomorrow/Saturday afternoon.

#-5: Timberwolves (Last Week: -4).  I think I have said this before, but the Woofie Dogs' latest loss Wednesday may be a new low for the franchise.

I get the following scorelines at their points of time from Jon Krawczynski of The Athletic.  The Wolves led Orlando by 20 early in the Third Quarter and by 16 with 2:44 to play in that same Quarter.  They led by 13 with 6:33 left in the Fourth Quarter.  They led by eight with 2:22 left in regulation.  And they led by two with 4.6 Seconds left.  Jarred Vanderbilt was on the line at the time, shooting two after being fouled.  He's shit when it comes to Free Throws.

He missed the first.  And I think you can guess what happened next.

#NBA: #RaisedByWolves 96 (3-10) - #MagicTogether 97 (7-8).

!BUZZER-BEATER DE COLE ANTHONY!. 🔥

DATO | PRIMER novato en TODA la historia de #MagicTogether en lograr un Buzzer-Beater.pic.twitter.com/seoqtV9HyD

— All Sports Py (@AllSportsPy) January 21, 2021

They lost in Atlanta for the Hawks' annual MLKJD Game, and Friday's home date with Memphis was postponed because of coronavirus issues -- and by the way, this postponement was the Wolves' fault.  But in a long list of team emasculations, this is ... only the latest.  It doesn't matter that Karl-Anthony Towns is still out with the virus, and it doesn't matter that this squad is the youngest in the NBA.  These dumb motherfuckers should have won this Game.  And that they lost this one is a deserved indictment of all involved.

I will forever be indebted to Glen Taylor.  Say what you will about his competence in running the franchise.  But he kept the Timberwolves in Minnesota, and he's doing his damnedest to sell this team to someone who will vow to keep it in Minnesota.  That being said, right now, I don't mind if this goddamn team moves to Seattle.

Oh, and this is a shit ton of evidence that Ryan Saunders is in over his head as Head Coach.

This Week: Back-to-back home contests vs. Atlanta and New Orleans, then a pair of tilts at Golden State.

Things Fall Apart, A Three-Part Series -- Part II: Can A Remote Control Just Conk Out?

Yeah, it happened a couple weeks ago, I think?  I wanted to turn on my TV, which is between five and ten years old but doesn't seem to have any problems with it, and I couldn't do it with my remote.  I thought the batteries finally ran out, but I switched them and it still didn't work.  Which made me believe that, after years of no trouble, my remote control just crapped out, utterly and immediately.

In an example of how Amazon has warped all our perceptions when it comes to shopping, going online to buy a replacement remote was my first instinct ... not remembering that Target or Wal-Mart might have them, I don't have to wait for it to be delivered, and it might be cheaper.  But the one I saw at Wal-Mart ... well, it might be a pipe dream, but they are not the exact same remote control I have.  I don't think the ones available have all the buttons in all the places my original equipment remote have them in.  And, this is cosmetic, but my original has "SAMSUNG" written on the bottom, and the one I saw.  (I also went to Target but they didn't have a remote in my brand ... and come to think of it, I have not gone to Best Buy, although maybe I should have.)  So I bought a remote which has a picture of an exact replica of my OEM remote, and I bought that, knowing full well it might just be the same close-but-not-quite remote I saw at Wal-Mart.  I'll take that chance.  And so I ordered it, like, more than a week ago.

Amazon says the remote won't come until early February at the earliest.  Really?  You can't find a Samsung Original Equipment Manufacturer remote control in any of your warehouses in the States?  You have to get it from South Korea ... or have it made in South Korea, and then get it sent by, apparently, cargo ship and then Pony Express?

I don't know if this is a concurrent development or if it's just coincidence, but for the past couple weeks I cannot get Channel 4, the local CBS affiliate.  I tried scanning (this was just before my remote conked out), and it still didn't come in.  Weird.  So I have had to go out to the dining room TV whenever I wanted to watch Colbert or AFC NFL Games.  I can't wait for this remote control to arrive, and then I need to figure out how to get all my channels on my television set.

We All Knew. The Correct-Minded People Of This Country Knew.

Blog posting this on the eve of kicking out Donald Trump.

I remember a little over four years ago, after Trump cheated to take the presidency.  There were a couple of people I know -- they were from high school and I reconnected with them through Facebook -- who didn't see that big of a deal over how much some of us believed he would be a fucking disaster.  It basically boiled down to a warning that may forever trigger me: "Why don't we just give him a chance?"

This is an incontrovertible fact: Donald Trump is a failure.  Corrupt, cruel, incompetent, selfish, mean, violent, and traitorous.  Being The Worst President In American History is something probably best left to historians, but I think so, and he definitely is the worst in my lifetime.  And jail is too good for him.  Good fucking riddance once 11 o'clock rolls around, and if there is a God, justice upon Donald Trump will come -- soon after, swiftly, and utterly.

This is also an incontrovertible fact: People knew he was a fuck-up.  We knew we should not give him a chance to see if he would be a good president.  Because ever since he flapped his gums about Barack Obama being born in Kenya, I and we knew he was a dirty asshole.  Every rude comment and utterance that if it were coming from a parent would make you think he or she had early onset dementia -- people didn't see that?!  People didn't see that he didn't give two shits about helping the country, and that he was the talisman for a growing and dangerous group of Our Fellow Americans who want to take their sacred right to vote and toss it in the trash so they could anoint a dictator for life just because he's White?

There are people who, on his way out, are shocked, shocked I tell you, that Donald Trump wasn't what they hoped he would be.  These people are not as bad as those who would willingly fellate him if they saw him on the street (and there are many -- some of them are Facebook friends!), but it's close.  We are not in a period of time where we can suffer fools lightly.  We are in the middle of a pandemic.  The economy is in the shitter.  And there are white supremacists who want to start a race war to get Trump back in the White House.  These people who wanted to give Trump a chance remain too Pollyanna-ish to be of any use in our current reality.

We all knew.  The correct-minded people of this country knew that Trump would leave the United States worse than when he stole it.  Saying this isn't flexing.  What we knew doesn't make us smart, not in the least.  We were just paying attention.  And these oblivious folks had better fucking start doing this same.

Things Fall Apart, A Three-Part Suite -- Part I: More Tire Problems

I have been kind of dutiful when it comes to checking the air on my tires.  They say it should be done weekly.  I can do it weekly -- in the parking lot at work after my day has ended.  I do this on Mondays because there are way fewer people at my company on Mondays, which means I can park closer to the designated entrance (due to the pandemic, we are required to check in through self-check-in temperature-taking kiosks which, as of right now, are only at one door), which just so happens to have flat land.  Usually I need to park in the back, and the lot back there is not level.  And, they say that I should measure the air in my tires after leaving my car sitting for a while on flat land.  Hence, it's best for me to do it on Mondays.  There is one proviso: I would not be so dutiful, or obsessed, with checking the air on my tires were it not for one of them bursting flat that one night.  I should be oblivious when it comes to this, but instead, fear has forced me to become diligent when it comes to this chore.

I've been lucky in that the past couple of weeks or times (I haven't been doing them every week, just most weeks) I have not needed to put air in because all four tires have had air pressure at or above the recommended numbers.  That luck ran out yesterday, even though it had to happen at some point.

I was also lucky in that at the gas station closest to me, there was no car and no driver using the free air hose.  There usually is someone there, and instead of waiting I would go to another gas station a little farther away.  Anyway, I pull up and start putting the balance of the air into the tires -- which, for the record (and I won't say which amount goes to which tire because that's anal even for me) was .5, 1.0. 1.5 and 2.0.

Well, I will say that the passenger-side rear tire needed 2.0 ... whatever units of air.  And I put in the hose, then I pull it out because, you know, you need to check with your tire gauge if you put in enough or too much.  I think I put it in this tire and after a second or too, I didn't hear anything.  The sound of air going into the tire stopped, and there was no sound of air going out of it.  It was just ... stuck.

So I pull it out.  I put it in again, and I hear nothing.  And then I look at the valve stem of the tire.  If you take a close look at the valve, there is a skinny notch that is suspended right in the middle of the stem.  That protuberance is the part that sticks out of what is called, I think, the valve core, and I believe that that is the thing that keeps the air in the tire.  You push that thing in, and you let the air out.  And if you look at the air hose, there is a similar notch surrounded by space and a ring; you push that opening up against the stem, the hose's notch pushes down on the valve core's notch, and I assume that air from the hose pushes into the tire, filling it up.

Well, this notch is bent on this tire.  I don't know how it got bent, but I swear I would have noticed it before yesterday if it were.  So it looks like the hose, possibly with help from the cold weather possibly making any surface with any moisture frozen and thus sticky, yanked that core notch out of alignment when I pulled it out, and I think that's the reason the hose could not force any more air inside the tire.

I went out to take a look again at night, well past dinner, to make sure that I wasn't seeing things and that this protuberance really wasn't equidistant from any point of the outside of the stem.  I tried to yank it back into the middle with tweezers from my Swiss army knife, but that didn't work.  Fortunately, I didn't hear any air signaling a slow leak coming from the tire -- yet.  And it looks as though, according to my tire gauge, I managed to fill it up to within .5 whatever units before the valve core got all kinked.  So I have to prepare (maybe, if the reason I can't fill up my tire is because of the relatively cold weather) to go into a shop and get a new valve stem for this tire.  I just hope I am able to get it fixed before that tire loses all air pressure -- assuming I can't put air in it ever again.

This leads me to believe that the brand of tire I got for my car, which besides the one I had to replace are not even two years old, isn't that good.  One tire burst out of nowhere even though I'm sure it wasn't so severely underinflated to the point where such an explosion could happen, and now this, which is a different tire.  Not impressed.

Finally, one thing I've just realized.  I know that the passenger-side rear tire is .5 whatever air units short of where it should be because I used the tire gauge after I saw the air hose couldn't pump more air into it.  My tire gauge has a similar mouth to the air hose, where there's a notch in the middle of a ring.  That notch is also supposed to push in the notch in the valve stem in order to measure air pressure.  My gauge did that, a couple times.  So ... the air hose couldn't push that notch in properly, but my tire gauge could?  Maybe this isn't as big of a problem as I'm afraid it is -- hopefully?

This Is An Inside Job

Those traitors that trashed the U. S. Capitol in the hopes of capturing and executing members of Congress?  Well, there is now word that Trump is going to spurt out one final flurry of pardons, clemencies and commutations tomorrow.  It looks like it's going to be comprehensive, blanket pardons for his inner circle, i.e. his family and his most loyal ass-kissers, which is bullshit.  But I am going to go out on a limb and believe that he'll do the same for the people who, in his name, stormed the Capitol and committed sedition.

It serves those idiot cocksuckers right, believing their god-king actually gives two flying fucks about them.  As always, Donald Trump does anything only for his wallet, his ego, or his penis.  But he isn't the only person openly flouting democracy.  Republicans sided up to him and tolerate the crazy fucking people he controls like the Wicked Witch of the West does those flying monkeys because he gave them the power to pull off tax cuts and to seed the judiciary with Republicans that are a slightly different type of crazy.  But, those Republican judges are still "united" with these Trump-humpers, and my fear is they will get these insurrectionists off with light sentences once they appear in their courts.  That's the real reason I'm scared these people won't be brought to justice, or at least to the fullest extent of the law.

The scaffolding of dictatorship and violence has already been erected.  Anybody committing treason will be pardoned or excused by those in power who support them.  And those traitors themselves are a part of this autocratic architecture: More than several people who vandalized the Capitol and murdered a security officer were cops themselves.  And now comes word that members of the National Guard are being vetted before Wednesday's inauguration for fear that some of them are traitors themselves.  Great.  And that's on top of ample evidence that members of Congress themselves were trying to help those seditionists find Pence and Pelosi from the inside.  My fucking God, they're with them.

They're all with them.

Judases in our midst.  Hiding in plain sight.

My God.

Buck Conventional Wisdom. Fuck Conventional Wisdom

I play ESPN Streak frequently, even though I'm not good enough to win anything.  Man, why do I do it?

Anyway, I noticed something in the five things I picked yesterday.  I went 3-2.  Wins: Florida St. would beat North Carolina (this is men's college basketball); Josh Allen would not pass for more Touchdowns in the First Half of the Buffalo Bills-Baltimore Ravens Divisional Playoff Game than Lamar Jackson (and they tied -- neither scored a passing TD); and the two teams would combine to score two or fewer TDs in the Second Half of that Game (the total was two, both by Buffalo).  Losses: I thought Red Bull Leipzig would beat Wolfsburg (this is the Bundesliga, and the teams drew at two) and Aaron Rodgers would throw for less than 150 Yards in the First Half of the Green Bay Packers-Los Angeles Rams Divisional Playoff.

These choices come with percentages of how many people playing pick which side.  Take a look at how many people choose the side I choose (and I list these five choices in chronological order):

• RB Leipzig winning: 72.0% -- and this was a loss;
• Florida St. winning: 34.0% -- and this was a win;
• Rodgers throws for 149 Yards or less in the First Half: 64.9% -- and this was a loss;
• Jackson throws for as many or more TDs in the First Half than Allen: 13.5% -- and this was a win;
• Buffalo and Baltimore combine to score two or fewer TDs in the Second Half: 22.2% -- and this was a win;

You see that the two times I went along with the majority I lost, but the three times I went against the grain I won?  Yes, yesterday/Saturday appeared to be a day where minority opinions were the way to go.  But this shows that sometimes, you should ignore the wisdom of the crowd.

Well, until you shouldn't.

Their Impossible Questions

I had dreams of cleaning my room.  Like, extensively today.  I had a thought of going out today, if only to, like, eat and see my storage unit.  But I really didn't have any reason to go out because it was high time to start looking through my mail and see if I can toss anything.

I was going to do that after lunch.  But then my parents ask me an impossible question, again.  When Mother deleted a photo on her phone, that same photo was automatically deleted on Father's phone.  Can that, like, not happen?

I told them I'd look into it.  I then retreated into my bedroom, and I swear, the enormity of trying to investigate yet another of their questions sapped all my energy.  I turned on the radio to listen go the Gopher men's basketball Game (they gave Michigan its first loss on the Year), crawled into bed, and promptly fell asleep for a nap that I think lasted three hours.  And I swear, if I had not been asked that impossible question, my bedroom would be spotless by now.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Wild (Re-Entry!).  All it takes one singular, highlight effort for The State Of Hockey to get Kirill Kirazy:

The fantasies of a fanbase, especially one who has been starved for a championship, can get very out of hand.  Hell, I'm saying this after only one friggin' Game -- although Kirill Kaprizov has become only the third NHL Rookie ever to score the Overtime winner in his first-ever league match.  But I think it is accurate to say that, for the first time in a long time, there is actually hope for the newest, youngest players in this organization.  And after a few Years of only listening to whispers of how this Russian half a world away named is tearing through the Kontinental Hockey League, Wild fans will taste this morsel and believe they are full.  Yeah, a Game-winning Goal (oh ... by the way, they defeated the Los Angeles Kings in L. A.) like this makes the thought of lifting the Stanley Cup tangible.  Hopefully, this will be the first of many for him.

Like the NBA, the NHL is doing what college hockey traditionally does, having two teams play each other at least twice in one venue.  They remain in Los Angeles to play the Kings against Sunday, then travel to Orange County to play Anaheim Monday and Wednesday.  They will then finally open up home play with two against San Jose, the first of which is Friday night.

#-2: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -2).  They are 2-1 for this week, having swept a three-Game series (which began  with a hastily-scheduled Game at Ridder on Thursday) with 4-1 and 4-0 victories over the Huskies in a home-and-home.  That elevated them to the top of both polls for the week.  But on this/Friday afternoon (I forgot last last/Thursday night that the survey goes out on Fridays) the #1 Gophers traveled to Wisconsin, the school they supplanted as #1, and got absolutely smoked, 5-0.  Minnesota might not have won, but they shouldn't get blown out, nor shut out, against Wisconsin, and it doesn't matter where Bucky Badgers is ranked and that the U. is on the road.  A tad disconcerting.  They finish up tomorrow/Saturday afternoon before having almost two Weeks off.

#-3: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -1).  Unfortunately the club finally lost their first Game of the season, at dreaded Wisconsin Saturday, 3-1.  Bounced back nicely Sunday to defeat the Badgers, 5-3.  They were able to retain the #1 ranking in both college hockey polls.  They were joined in the top spot of the rankings by the women's team.  It was the first time both Minnesota hockey programs were ranked #1 (in, I'm assuming, at least one poll for both genders, even though both Golden Gopher clubs were ranked #1 last week in all of them) for the first time since October 27, 2014 (hat tip to Andy York of The Daily Gopher).

Will it last?  They are playing the first Game of their two-Game series vs. Notre Dame as I type this.  It begins a two-series, four-Game homestand; after playing the Fighting Irish tomorrow/Saturday, they will host Arizona St. Thursday and Friday.

#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -5).  Lost at home to San Antonio (in Overtime, after squandering a big lead) Saturday with Karl-Anthony Towns.  Won the next night, at home, also to the Spurs, without KAT, thereby ending their losing skid at seven.  Then they started a new losing streak Wednesday, at home, versus The Bastard Vancouver Grizzlies, with KAT.

And then their final Game this screening week, also at home against Memphis tonight/Friday night, was postponed.  Then the implications as to why started to multiply.  When announcing the postponement today/Friday, the NBA said that contract tracing has reduced the number of available players on the Wolves to below eight, which is the minimum number of players a squad has to have in order to play.  Then, it was discovered that both Ricky Rubio and Juancho Hernangomez are two of the people that would have to sit out the Game tonight/Friday night because they were swept up in the league's health and safety protocols.

Then, the big one.  A bit later, KAT announced that he has COVID-19.  You may remember that the virus killed his mother and six other members of his family.  This goddamn coronavirus is a fucking serial killer destroying a family.

On his announcement through Twitter, he promised his niece and nephew that he "will not end up in a box next to grandma and I will beat this."  Good on you, KAT.

This week: At Atlanta Monday afternoon to be the guests for the Hawks' annual MLK Jr. Day Game, which I hear has become an awesome annual event.  They then come back to Target Center to host Orlando.

#-5: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -4).  So from this point downward, all the clubs went winless.  I will give the top spot of those three to the Dinkytown male b-ballers, who got crushed in Iowa Sunday afternoon by 15.  But that defeat continues to prove the home=good, away=bad dynamic that not only the U. but seemingly the Big Ten most of the time evinces.  They are still ensconced in the bracket -- albeit as a 7-seed, according to Joe Lunardi.

The gauntlet of this part of the league schedule ends with a return date with Michigan tomorrow/Saturday afternoon at Williams.  They then visit Nebraska Wednesday.

#-6: Gopher wrestling (Re-Entry!).  Start the Year dropping a dual at Nebraska, 22-14.  So this continues to be the reality for this program: Once the best, now an also-ran, maybe moreso in the shrinking college wrestling world.  But does losing to the Cornhuskers represent a new low?

This club is in East Lansing, Mich., tomorrow/Saturday.  But things will be done differently because of COVID-19.  They will play two conference foes: Maryland in the early afternoon, then the host Spartans later in the afternoon.  Will these guys go 0-3 to start their season?

#-7: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -3).  This squad has now lost three in a row after losing to nine to Penn St. Sunday, then getting dominated by Maryland, 90-73.  Both Games were at home, ick.  I keep hearing that Lindsay Whalen has put together fantastic recruiting classes, but where's the development?  Where are the individual performances?  Where's the heart?  I don't see that coming out of team that is now a wretched 2-7.

One Game this screening week: In Nebraska Tuesday afternoon.

Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: December

A bevy -- 15 babes this month!  And ... uh, the more I look, the more underwhelmed I am.  They're not outright heifers or anything, but most of the waitresses don't stand out.  And of those I would consider the best, I can name at least one glaring drawback to either her or her shot.

I can point to six that are better than the rest, and within those six, I can name a top three.  The other ones -- Keaton of Humble, Tex.; Ashley of Lone Tree, Colo.; and, well, another Ashley, from Atlantic City, N. J. (both Ashleys have their photos side-by-side, and I think having models with their names typed out in adjacent pictures is a big no-no) -- are good.  However, the Colorado Ashley is holding a surfboard for some damn reason and the New Jersey Ashley is wearing a two-piece green bandeau top, but both top and bottom are so wide it's reminiscent of a forties swimsuit.  And Keaton ... shit, she's got a nice body, but her expression is so blah, her photo makes no impact.

I'll give third place to the main girl, Rebecca, hailing from Fort Smith, Ark.  She's showing a tight stomach, and she's got the effect of wet sand all of her chest, abs, hip and legs, and that's fucking hot.  But her red bikini top is one of those that is cropped just under the boobs but has long sleeves.  Huh?

Chicago's Marissa takes second.  Red two-piece with white flower pattern.  Blonde, can see her cleavage, and her bikini bottom is cut so that she's showing, like, half of her ass.  (Uncut bikini bottoms were the thing for the 2020 Hooters calendar, but I've taken a sneak peek at 2021, which I bought last month -- and trust me, Hooters is caving to the self-gaslighting times of today and having their women show ass.)  However, she is posed bending over something, and her ass is off to the left, behind her and thus out of focus.  Marissa looks beautiful, but her picture doesn't show her off.

The best girl is a returning favorite, and I think she won a month in 2019.  It's Nanako, out of Tokyo.  Now, her black bikini top (branded with the Hooters logo, a nice touch) is a full cover -- no cleavage or sideboob or anything.  Also, she has black hair here, and I swear she was a light brunette in her '19 photo.  Her stern look ... no, it's not a smile, and she kind of looks like Olivia Munn, which is neither bad nor good, but it's ... different, and I think such a look is sexy on her.  Finally, I like her stomach.

So, hey, in a frequently-flawed December, Nanako is the best one.  And I will try my best to masturbate to the month.

You Know The One Good Thing About Wearing A Mask?

As a guy who talks to myself a lot, and has a propensity to mouth both things in my head and songs I'm listening to, I'm sure I've been caught talking to myself.  But when you're hiding behind a mask, people can't see your lips.  So I can sing to myself or move my lips to the things I'm saying in the violent images in my head as much as I want, and people will just see a guy in a mask!  Kewl!

OK, This Motherfucking Asshole Is Gonna Give Me COVID

I should've punched this guy.

OK, I went into the gas station to buy lottery tickets and to get gasoline for my car.  It was afternoon rush hour, so the place was packed as shit.  (Oh, and I was going to park there, decided I couldn't because I wanted a space close enough so that the attendant could see my license plate, then realized I needed to go in to pre-pay, so I went back.)

This asshole in front of me is an anti-masker.  He looked like a stereotype, my version, of a guy who is an anti-masker.  He's White, he had an old war vet hat on, he had straight and straggly gray hair, and he looked like he hadn't showered in a week.  Him not wearing a mask already set me off.  But his entire ... mise-en-scene just pushed me over the edge.  I hate the look of this fucker.  He looked like he participated in that coup attempt on the U. S. Capitol last week.

And he wasn't alone.  He brought his little shit kid with him.  He wasn't wearing a mask, either.  And they were taking their sweet-ass time amidst a line of people picking out scratch-off tickets.  He was talking to his itty-bitty son about which of those tickets he wants.  And he was going to be patient with him, and let him buy as many tickets as he wanted.  I was about six feet away from this Republican prick, but I'm sure everyone could see him.  He wasn't shouting, but everyone, I swear, could hear him.  He was oblivious to the concerns of the people around him, or the world.  It was just him and his little shit kid, and pandemic schmandemic.

(Aside: The cashier helping this self-absorbed motherfucker, who was wearing a mask, looked uncomfortable serving him.  Either he was annoyed with him taking so long or he hated being so close to him, even with a plexiglass screen between them.  I am not one of those people who threatens to report businesses that don't force customers to wear masks.  It would be nice.  But I can see myself in his shoes, just trying to get this bastard and his bastard son out of the way so he can deal with customers actually following the law.  It's the responsibility of a person to follow the law.  And this straggly-ass shitface obviously believes he's above it.)

I complained about that selfish young girl at the library talking loudly to her friend on the phone in the library.  I've tested negative since that unpleasant encounter.  But I've been so pissed off since seeing this stranger's uncovered ass face.  And I feel like my throat's a little dry, and there might be a tickle down in my stomach.  Swear to fucking God, if this is the piece of shit who gives me the coronavirus. ...

Goddammit, I Just Missed A Day Of Blog Posting!

I checked just now to make sure I did yesterday ... and I didn't!

And now I remembered that I wanted to do it today because I didn't ... and I forgot!

And the worst thing?  I was on my computer for a couple hours before midnight last night!  I had every chance of doing it just a couple hours ago ... and I fucking blew it!  And it wasn't as if I was busy.  I was listening to the college football championship Game and that was it.

Fuck me.

From now on, I blog as soon as midnight comes around.  And maybe I should rethink trying to blog post twice in one day, because I did that Sunday and I think I thought that that later Sunday blog post I did early Monday morning.

Goddammit.  A long streak, broken.

Avoiding Him On Second Shift

So the person who files on second shift is taking next Monday off.  I style myself a human Swiss army knife, so I once again volunteered to take that shift.  Variety!

Before when I filled in, and especially when it's only one day and I would have to revert to my usual daytime schedule, my boss would allow me to shift up my night by two hours.  But this time around I told him I could fill in for her exactly at the hours she works.  Why?  Heh ... yeah, I want to avoid that guy.  As much as possible.  He leaves a half-hour before I would come in, otherwise I would have to sit next to him and his negative energy for 90 minutes, and that would blow.  Besides, I know that I'll make a mistake, he'll bitch about it to my boss and he'll tell me about it the next day.  If he's going to be like that, I'd rather just not see him at all.

But I wonder: Can people tell I am now actively trying to avoid him?

Getting Tested; "Frothy Spit"

I try to get tested as much as possible.  I used to go to a clinic where I could quickly get some nurse's assistant to shove a swab up my nose, but either due to other people or a change in policy, I now go to a clinic on Eat Street, where I have had to wait, at most, I think, an hour.

Meanwhile there are these public walk-in testing places where you spit into a vial.  I was trying to find a place where I could make an appointment, but frankly, now that I've gone several times, I don't think they check if you've made an appointment.  I think you can just walk in and do it.

And spitting into a vial was uncomfortably hard the first time I did it.  I was told I had "frothy spit," and that didn't count.  So I was there, literally, 45 minutes, trying to generate spit to get to this freakin' line on the vial.

It's been easier since.  Much easier.  It probably was because I ate just before I tested the first time.  Now it takes me mere minutes.

But it dawned on me the first time I was in this place, and I still think of this whenever I go in there.  As I was indoors for a long time with a sort-of crowd (although everyone was wearing masks), some of the people getting tested had to be there thinking they were positive because they were positive.  Wouldn't it be ironic, so goddamn ironic, that I was afraid of testing positive for COVID-19 and because I was stuck there for so long, I got COVID-19?  That's the ironic risk whenever I go to a clinic, I guess, but still, it sucks.

Addendum To: Addendum To: A Blessing In Disguise, But My Penis Does Not Think So

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