May Be A Super-Busy Weekend

I expect to work both the Gophers and the Vikings Games over the weekend-ish.  (Did both teams raise a concern that both football teams in town seem to be playing home Games over the same weekend?)  I say "-ish" because the gigs, if they come through, are going to seep around the weekend, too.

The Gophers play early Saturday morning.  I've been asked if I'm free, to which I said yes.  However, I also said yes to working the day before, the set day.  I haven't been confirmed for either day, but if I work one, obviously it'll be Saturday.  But I can work both.  Heck, I'm free Friday; originally I had the day off from it because I planned on my doctor's appointment then, but I'll cancel it if I'm asked to work.  Hopefully they'll get back to me on time.

The Vikings don't play Sunday.  They play Monday, and I have been asked to work it.  I haven't really gotten this job yet either.  I asked when I had to report on Monday, and he hasn't gotten back to me.  I hope the reason he hasn't is because he doesn't work weekends.  Anyway, I said I was also available Sunday; haven't heard back from that yet.

So it's possible I'm working gigs from Friday through Monday.  That will make me a very busy, tired (especially since I'm working my job too) and kind-of rich (?) boy at the end of it all.

Expenses Without Receipt

Starting from Tuesday, October 27:

• And from here we go back to Thursday, October 22.  Miller Amusements, who may or may not be a vendor at The Minnesota State Fair, announced they were planting their trailers at the local grocery store to sell Fair food for one final weekend.  Given how close they are to me and that they're closing down until (I'm guessing) the summer, I figured I would commemorate by eating there.  They had three trailers, and I think most of the items they sold overlapped each other.  So, given my OCD, I bought a footlong hot dog and one trailer, went several yards away and bought ranch cheese curds at a second trailer, and walked several yards back to get a large lemonade.  I tipped a buck at each trailer, so the grand total of my after-work early dinner was: $29.
• On Wednesday the 21st MC Lyte was performing at the Dakota.  This falls under the "Would I go to see an artist for that one song I know from her/him/them that I like/know?" conundrum I blog posted about when I saw Digable Planets.  And because the price point was reasonable enough, the answer was yes ... and I'm glad I did, because even though MC Lyte spoke a lot, she is a master storyteller -- and by that I mean literal storytelling, as she looked back on her life and engaged us with stories about growing up in New York and how she's about to get inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame.  She would be a great visiting professor.  So I once again paid cash for the ticket ($61.61 in actuality, but the box office person didn't need the penny), then paid cash for the alcoholic "cappuccino," the Wild Acres duck rice plate, and lemon ice box cake.  With tip I spent a total of: $141.60.
• To Tuesday the 20th where, somewhat at the behest of ******a, I went down to see her at My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Edition).  I was glad to keep her company on a typically slow Tuesday at the strip joint.  They were short-staffed, however, so no server came over to get me a drink.  ******a let me take her bottle of water; Buddha bless her.  Cover, tips for the strippers (and ******a) on stage and 20 table dances for ******a equals: $224.
• I later went to my football game-watching hangout downtown to let the manager, who works Tuesdays, know how things are going that and the following Saturday.  I ate dinner there.  With tip: $33.
• Monday, October 19 -- for the previous few days I wondered what I would eat as I watched Monday Night Football.  This night was the night I decided to try Chipotle's chili lime chips, which are good, but leave a residue of dust on my fingers.  I had it with guacamole (and, I should say, I paired that up with Taco Bell I got at the drive-thru after I parked to buy my Chipotle because I was about to lose my free chalupa if I didn't use it in time).  With tip: $6.60.
• Tuesday, October 13: ******e came over.  Thought she moved to Vegas.  Didn't.  Glad she didn't.  For the HJ: $120.
• Afterwards I went to this local Mexican place.  It was going to be a different Mexican place close by me, but the road to get there was closed that night for some reason, so I went to this other local Mexican place.  I like it because the heap the proteins there, but they always put on an extra "salsa bar" charge even though I rarely use it.  I was perturbed that night over it, so I thought I might as well pour some salsa over my tacos if I'm paying for it (even though I think Mexicans as a rule don't put salsa on their tacos; it's an American thing).  I'm also peeved that these guys round up to the nearest nickel.  With tip: $15.34.
• To Saturday, October 10, where I went to get my car washed for the first time in a while.  Charged the wash, so this EWR is tip only: $5.
• I then went to my game-watching hangout with fellow alumni.  With tip: $39.
• Friday the 9th -- I had the day off to see the guy shutting down our sprinkler system.  I went to The Minneapolis Institute Of Art mainly to see the crop art pieces, most of which were at The Minnesota State Fair.  No lines that were 2 1/2 hours long, thank God.  On my way out of MIA I made a donation of: $10.
• When I went to MIA I parked close to Glam Doll Donuts.  I bought one donut and a bottle of apple juice before I went to the museum, and on my way home, I decided, for the first time ever, to buy a half-dozen of them.  I used to go to this place so often when it was open late on weekends, but now that they close by the evening (and I have a full-time job), I only go there at most twice a year, so I bought a lot of donuts to make up for it.  The cashier threw in an extra donut, which gave me even more of a reason to sit down and eat one of them before I left.  Oh, and one of the bakers from when I was there late at night was there working.  We recognized each other and said hi.  Haven't seen that dude in years.  Plus tip: $19.
• On Wednesday the 7th ******a came by.  Yes, I was a naughty boy: $150.
• And on Monday the 5th *****y came by.  We don't do the naughty boy stuff; she just wanks me, and wanks me good: $150.
• To Saturday, October 3, where I went to the gas station and picked up Powerball tickets for Father.  He has me buying lottery tickets even though the jackpot was (and, as I write this, still is) below a billion dollars.  Don't know why he's having me do this.  Cost: $10.
• I was working the Gophers football Game, so I got to our game-watching spot in downtown Minneapolis a bit late.  The server seemed busy and indifferent, so I finally waddled up to the bar to get a Pepsi and Angry Orchard.  She finally got around to our table, so I was able to order a steak salad.  All that with tip came out to: $40.
• Thursday the 1st ... I was able to finally get ******e to come over.  She was great.  She used the bottle of coconut oil ******a left for me years back when she massaged me, but ******e used it to concentrate on my pee-pee until I lost all control.  The problem with this is she charges way more than I'm comfortable giving her.  This was a probationary HJ, and frankly, that's as far as I'm willing to go, even though she worked me over like a pro.  Paid her: $150.
• Afterwards I went to Applebee's because I wanted to try that cut-in-half burger that's plunged into a skillet filled with queso.  Obviously the cheese turns solid once it cools down even a tad, but I'm glad I ate its gooeyness.  I was able to eat and drink at a bar that was showing the Thursday Night Football Game and MLB and WNBA Playoff Games.  If I had ever been to this Applebee's, it was maybe a decade ago.  With tip: $34.
• Going back to Tuesday, September 29, where I was going to see a movie at the Trylon and I had time for a beer, so I walked to Arbiter Brewing for a pair of four-ounce glasses.  Good place in a lively area of South Minneapolis.  With tip it came out just to: $10.
• I went to the Trylon several times over the previous weeks because they had a themed festival for which they offered this program whereby if you saw enough movies in this festival and got this punch card they gave out punched enough times, you would get free popcorn, a free ticket or, if you ran the table and saw all of them, a free multi-ticket discount card.  This was the final night of this festival, and by going on this night I was able to get a fourth punch and thus get my popcorn free.  The movie was Je Tu Il Elle, by slow cinema pioneer Chantal Akerman.  It was less than 90 minutes long but, because it was slow cinema, it felt twice that.  I had to pee when it came to the scene where the truck driver guy, who picked up the hitchhiking main character (played by Akerman, who subsequently gave him an HJ), confessed that he was turned on by his daughter.  I know French-language auteur cinema frequently is risque, but I kind of checked out at that icky scene.  I thought that when I went to the bathroom to give myself a mental cleanse, I was only half an hour through the movie.  Turns out there were only 15 minutes left, so maybe that example of cinema wasn't that slow.  Anyway, I paid for the ticket and a bottle of Mexican Coke, so with the free popcorn that all came out to: $11.
• Saturday, September 26 -- went to Nelson's Cheese for a KC Beef sandwich and a large clam chowder.  With tip: $15.
• Went to my college football Game-watching hangout downtown.  With tip: $41.
• Thursday, September 24: ****e finally stopped by.  Wanted to get down with her for a long time, but she was the one who continually insisted we do something with another stripper girlfriend.  This time she came alone, and she was quite calm, compared to the times she leaped onto me and went after my genitals with the quickness.  I think I paid her more than I wanted to because I didn't have a $10.  Hope she doesn't use that as a floor through which I can never go down; otherwise she's getting too expensive, too: $160.
• Finally, on Wednesday the 23rd I finally got to Mara, the well-regarded restaurant at The Four Seasons in downtown Minneapolis.  While I had planned to go there at some point this year, I didn't think I would go there on this night.  I planned to see David Straithairn in Waiting For Godot at The Guthrie Theatre, and I walked there thinking I would be in time for a 7:30 show.  Much to my surprise and chagrin, the performance started at 7.  I did not want to attend a play a half-hour late, so I decided to go another time (I went the following week; great show!) and instead, on my way back to my car, this was the perfect time to try Mara.  Maybe I ordered too much food, but I was only mildly impressed with the bar selections I got.  The potato croquettes, the first meal I ate, probably was the best.  With a Mara Bloom cocktail, walleye sliders, a pistachio opera (it's a dessert) and tip, I spent: $100.

I continue to vow I will do these more frequently so these won't be so long.

Good through October 27.

Glad I Didn't See That Shit In Person!

So my alma mater's football team lost last/Saturday night.  Got their asses kicked, actually.  They've been underachieving for, well, Decades now, but on paper at least this team should've won.  They didn't, not even close.  It boiled down to three things: Offense, Defense, and Special Teams.

Most of my fellow alumni who live here and who attend the Game-watching events I organize went to Wisconsin to watch in-person.  I declined when I had to make the decision, which, for logistical purposes (when do I buy a ticket?  How do I get there?  Where would I sleep?), was just before Labor Day, and I did so for a myriad of reasons.  I didn't want to think about buying a ticket and getting a rental car and finding a place to stay, especially in this economy and considering the fascistic practices of this government settling in places like, oh, airports.  Also, and this is a bit of a cop-out, I wanted to host the Game-watching event here.  (Turns out that didn't happen because I accepted work last/Saturday night; if I knew, say, in the late summer I would have the opportunity to work last/Saturday night, I would've jumped at the chance to say yes to the gig and no to the trip.)

But my team losing made me realize a deep-seated fear, and probably the real reason I didn't want to go: I ... well, didn't want to see my team lose in-person.  That fucking blows.  And consider everything else that would go into the losing.  You plan everything, buy the ticket, arrange lodging, get a rental or tune up your car, tell all your fellow alumni in Minnesota you're going across the border and/or meet alumni at events in Wisconsin, and then you get there and your team shits the bed.  Sure, there are other things to do there, namely parties that would/should be fun.  But speaking for myself, I wouldn't remember any of that because the point of going is going to the Game and seeing my team win, and if that doesn't happen, I would think all of this would be a tremendous waste of time and money.

I harken back to last Year when my team was in town and lost to Minnesota (the Loss was of the collapse variety, not the blowout variety -- damn, my team loses every which way).  I was only out the (pricey) cost of the ticket, and sure, the pre-Game party was fun, but my team lost, and that sucks royally.  Now, as a counterpoint (sort of, maybe), I went to Las Vegas a couple Years ago to see them play LSU ... and they won!  I took a risk, and I think that if they would have lost, I would be metaphorically hitting myself in the head for holding out hope that they would win.  But there are extenuating circumstances to that trip.  I didn't have to pay for housing; I just went to my parents' condo to stay (and to go through their mail).  They also taught me that I could go anywhere in Vegas via public transportation for $20.  Finally -- and I think I spoke about this here on WAF before -- I defrayed most of the cost of the expensive ticket to that Game because I had a credit through SeatGeek from, if I recall correctly, a ticket to the Frozen Four being held in St. Paul that fell through.  Unfortunately, I was told that I could only use it in one fell swoop, so if I didn't use it all for one ticket, I would lose the rest of the credit.  That is garbage, but it gave me the idea that I could use all that money for a ticket to see my alma mater's football team.  I think I hate wasting money more than seeing my team lose in-person.

So, under those principles, I decided I didn't want to go to Wisconsin.  Don't tell my friends who did go, but ... I made the right decision!

I Might Not Be Good At This Job Today/Saturday

So for the Game I'm doing today/Saturday, I am in this new spot that's a little more important than my usual position.  They're relying on me to relay information that they need to know -- like, really need to know, and in real time.  I did that earlier this season with, I'm sure, mixed results.  Moreover, I don't remember the last time I've been at this position for this company, if ever.

One thing I vowed from the last time was I needed binoculars.  I just bought them this week.  I hope this makes me more confident in getting the information on my own so I can relay that quicker and, hopefully, more accurately.  But I should be under no illusion that I just might suck at this job and this could be the last time I'm in this gig.  Hopefully it won't be that bad, or bad at all, but hopefully I won't think I can do this job just because I bought binoculars.  We'll see (shrug)

Oh -- Another Busy Weekend

I am working this weekend, both today/Saturday and tomorrow/Sunday.  Gopher football today/Saturday, Vikings tomorrow/Sunday.  If I really think about it, I'll be tired and intimidated.  So I don't.

This is not the first time.  In fact, it's not the first time this season.  It's the third time I'm doing a Golden Gopher-Viking weekend, actually, which makes me wonder why and how both football teams have home games scheduled on the same weekend at least three times this season.  I mean, isn't there any communication between the NFL and the Big Ten to not do that?

I've noticed another thing.  For the first two weekends, the same network was broadcasting both games.  I did not get the feeling that the crew for each game was ever in contact with the other.  On the one hand it makes sense since they're such a big network.  On the other hand they are in the same department, so they have had to at least bumped into each other at their home base.  Wouldn't they be at least curious enough of the co-workers who happen to be working in the same metro area to talk, or maybe even to hang out?  By the way, it was one network doing both games on the first weekend and a different network doing both games on the second weekend, but on this weekend, they're split -- I'm doing one game for each network.  I hope I don't wear the other company's clothing when I work.

Anxiety (Somewhat) Allayed

Yeah, so I was going to blog post about my anxieties over our Game-watching event tomorrow/Saturday night.  It's on at the same time as this other Game whose alumni regularly takes over the bar we go to.  Moreover, this Saturday most of the people who attend my event are actually going across the border to watch the Game in person.  Finally, I probably will not make it to the Game because I decided to pick up a gig at the Gopher football Game.  It starts about four hours before the Game-watching event, but considering how traffic leaving the parking ramp was ridiculous, there's a good chance I won't make it.

Well, considering that my main worry was whether the event should be somewhere else, I'm not as freaked out.  I went to our bar earlier this week and the manager said that the crowds for this other alumni group are not as big now as they have been in years past.  Don't know why -- this program doesn't seem to have fair-weather fans, but they're not having a great season and they have a new Head Coach.  Regardless, this manager said that if someone comes early enough, they can find a table and a TV.

OK.  I told everyone who might come that's the plan.  Most of the regulars and I won't be there, but anyone who wants to watch in public now knows what can be done.  Not many people are going to show up; that's the bottom line.  But hopefully we'll get through this.  My problem now is next week -- everybody will be in town to watch, but our Games will be on at the same time, again.  Le sigh.

Another Conflict Preventing Me From Seeing My ATF

My parents now seems hellbent on getting the roof fixed.  Don't know why, but I think tomorrow/Monday, after work, a second person is going to inspect it, and maybe the siding, too.  Look, I don't know the first thing about home insurance, so I'm just going to defer to Father and this roofer and the insurance company (maybe, this is an insurance company after all).  It's yet another thing I've been thrust into "knowing" because Father wants it done.

What I know, and care, about is that it might be cock-blocking me from ******a coming over.  See, this all started late last week, when Mother asked me to call her while I was at work.  Once I got home, I called her, and she told me this second roofer wants to see the roof Saturday morning.  That would've worked until, like, Wednesday, when I picked up a gig at the Gophers football Game.  (Glad I took it, if only to have a great vantage point of the fans storming the field after they beat Michigan at home for the first time since '77.)  Mother gave me the roofer's number to text an alternate day and time.  We agreed on Monday evening, which is a little late considering the time of night the Sun sets nowadays.  But Mother wants this done ASAP, even though I have Friday free.

Once we agreed to Monday, ******a texted me.  She has been busy, plus she is dealing with a bad back that appears to be preventing her from giving me a massage, but out of the blue, she asked me what I was doing ... Monday.  Shit.  I told her what's happening, so right now, I'm going to text her once she's done.  She wasn't totally committing, either, because she doesn't want to come over too late.

There are so many variables to deal with this -- when within the two-hour time period she gave me she can get here, how long she's going to be here, if I can get home earlier than that, etc.  The big wrinkle, in my estimation, is that this roofer is friends with my sister's best friend.  This roofer actually re-did my sister's best friend's roof last year.  In fact, I want to say that my sister's best friend gave Mother the roofer's information.  Well, I think I said this here on WAF before, but my sister's best friend lives down the street from me.  And by the way, the roofer apparently is friends with my sister's best friend.  Now, imagine that once she gets done inspecting the roof, she'll just mosey on down and talk to my sister's best friend for a while.  If they're there talking long enough, maybe they'll notice that someone's dropped by my house for a visit.  And then the roofer (and maybe my sister's best friend -- who knows, maybe she and Mother are besties now) will tell Mother, and then she'll ask, "Who visited you?!?!?!"  Fuck that shit.

So I'm trying to see if the roofer might be able to reschedule.  Mother won't like that she might not come tomorrow/Monday, but I need to get all my muscles worked over (including the one that matters the most, hint-hint), and I want that HE in peace.  Maybe it'll work.  Or, maybe this will be the second time ******a has offered to touch me, only for me to decline because I have plans.  First it was the WNBA Draft (Olivia Miles doesn't look so good now that she was benched for all of the Second Half of Game 2, so me throwing my glasses on the table when she was announced as the pick now seems prescient), and now it's this roof inspection I'm told needs to be done.  Bad timing is so much of my life.

For The First Time In A Long Time, I'm Trying Something New

I will be working a game today, and I will be working as a parabolic microphone holder, or a "parab."  I don't know if you've seen these people holding these clear, curved cups or dishes in front of them, but today, that'll be me.  It is my first time ever being a parab, and it's scaring the hell out of me, but I think that is the definition of "growth," such as it is.

Strange how I got this job.  I've worked this type of production before, but while I knew the company would be in town, they had not said they were hiring until this week, and technically Wednesday, three days before the game.  Then, I was sent an e-mail asking for people who could be parabs and, this is important (at least in my mind), no experience is necessary.  You don't come across opportunities like that too often, especially at my age.  But I wanted to demonstrate I wanted to be a part of this company's production, and the pay is pretty good.  Plus, I need to spread my wings a bit.  I don't work games from the sideline too often, so this will be fun to experience.  Well, until a football player runs into me.  That's what I'm really scared of.

Anyway, I answer this e-mail that I am interested.  I then go through e-mails I received after that ... and that's when I see an offer to work this same production, but in a capacity I've worked at before.  I said yes to this, but the person making hiring decisions texted me and said I'm working the parabolic.  OK, but what about this other job?  I would prefer to continue on a position I've done with these guys before, so now that I'm not, am I showing this production that I'm flexible, or has a door been shut because I go through e-mails in order, answer them one by one, and was pegged to the first job I said yes to?  Because I know there are a few people there I'm familiar with, and it'll be strange to see them where they always are and I am not, and I have no assurances I can go back to my old job ever again.

I get uncomfortable in unfamiliar surroundings, and that's why I'm getting a bit testy.  This will always happen when I go to somewhere new, but I don't know where I'll be today, I don't know who I'll work for, and so I don't know how it'll turn out.  I know how things are with the position I've been at before, but I don't understand how I wasn't even considered to come back.  Because I would have said yes, they just didn't say anything until three days ago.

Well, alas and alack.  I have a few hours before I need to report.  Maybe not the best idea, then, to blog post now, and then eat those leftover mozzarella sticks from Applebee's Thursday night.  (I'm chasing them down with a Coke at 2 in the morning as well.)  But I was crashing around 7 in the evening, so I listened to my body and went to sleep, only to wake up a bit past midnight.  Hopefully I won't be asleep as I stand during the game.  That's a surefire way to be tackled by a football player on the sideline.

And My Weekend Is Busy, Too

Admittedly, I am filling it up with stuff I want to do in order to push out things I think I should do.  I thought this would be the weekend I would finally figure out the right arc for some of the sprinkler heads I've been working on.  Also, even though it's been really dry, maybe I should mow the yellow lawn.  And I should get around to my clothes and dishes ... and, oh yeah, my stuff.

But then I remembered that there is a house party on Saturday.  The cover's expensive as hell, and there's only one chick I care to see there, but ******e has invited me for a while and I haven't been there yet this calendar year, so it's time I go.  But there's also Porchfest, where bands play in front of houses in the Wedge neighborhood.  And then MNUFC is playing -- it's on the road, but I figure I would go to a watch party sponsored by the club at least once this season, and I'm doing so at a restaurant I haven't ever been to but have wanted to go to for some time, so that's extra enticement.  Then, tomorrow/Sunday afternoon, the Gopher women's soccer team is hosting Georgia.  Normally the U. hosts smaller colleges from the region, so having a brand-name school from the SEC (let alone a ranked one -- Gophers will have their hands full) come to Robbie Stadium to play is a special event to go to, and so I will be going.

By the way, one of my stripper girlfriends, *****a, needed help moving things Sunday afternoon.  I thought I could reach her through Messenger, but apparently I can only contact her now through Instagram, of which I don't have a personal account.  I would love to help, but since there apparently is no way to reach her, I can't help her.  Shucky darn!

So with all of that, I figure I could fix the sprinklers either Sunday morning or, if I'm not awake in time, after I come back.  I thought I should exercise in the evening, but I'm still not sure they're open, so maybe that sprinkler-fixing and, possibly, mowing will serve as my workout.  Or maybe I won't do those things ... which means I'll be spending this weekend having fun and not doing things I need to do.  Shucky darn!

Which Birthday Time Treat Should I Get?

I am noticing more and more that the happy things (as opposed to the sad things) that occupy my mind right now are looking forward to what I want to eat once I get out of work.  Maybe most people think that way.

Anyhoo, I was thinking yesterday/Tuesday if I want to eat after attending the Golden Gopher baseball Game at U. S. Bank Stadium.  It would depend on how snowy it would be; if it was manageable, I would go through the drive-thru (the Game, and the Gophers beat Gonzaga, went three hours, so there was no way I would be able to sit down at a restaurant) and suffer the sleet that came in through the open car window to order.  And it was manageable, so I did.

But which place?  I had in my mind getting this Mountain Dew Baja Blast Freeze whatever thingy from Taco Bell, which deposited it in my app because it's going to be my birthday soon.  I don't know if I will like it, and I hate Mountain Dew.  But it's free, so I'll get it.  And I thought I would get it last/Tuesday night.  But out of the blue I then remembered that this is also Shamrock Shake time, and those are tasty as hell.  I also think, although I'm not sure, that McDonald's (or at least the ones around here) pull them and the Oreo Shamrock McFlurry quickly, like the moment St. Patrick's Day is done.  That sucks, and I want to have them as much as possible.  So, assuming I'm right, I have only a week to enjoy them.  And that's what I was suddenly thinking when I pivoted from Taco Bell to McDonald's.

I got a regular Oreo Shamrock McFlurry as dessert for the Filet-O-Fish I used my points for.  I'm paying for it with my bowels -- darn lactose intolerance -- but I'm glad I remembered to get that green McFlurry at least once this year.

The Main Reason I Think I Hate MLS' "Flip"

Back in mid-November, Major League Soccer announced that they are going to change the schedule of the league.  Ever since its inception in 1996, they started play some time in the spring (in '96 it was April; now it begins late February or early March) and ends some time in early December.  But this Year, the 30th Year of MLS, will be the last under this calendar year format.  After playing a four-month "spring season" in the spring of 2027, MLS will align its year with pretty much every soccer league in every country on Earth, where they start late summer and end around Memorial Weekend.

Not too long ago, I heard the Commissioner for MLS say that he didn't think that would be a good idea, and I think his main reason was that so many northern cities (such as Minnesota United) would be affected by figuring out how to deal with a part of the summer-to-spring season that makes outdoor Matches well nigh impossible to stage in the winter.  Guess he changed his mind, and I guess that not sticking out like an outlier, especially when it comes to trying to bring in players through Transfer Windows that are, right now, a bit awkward, was enough of a reason to do this wholesale change.

At first blush, I hate this as a season-ticket holder.  The idea that players didn't want to join a club in MLS during the middle of our season or the middle of the season of the league they're coming from is still too abstract for me to care about.  But another plus the Commissioner claimed would make the new calendar better is that Major League Soccer would get away from having its postseason run right into the National Football League and college football.  True -- and I still don't think it's a good enough reason to do, as some people are calling it, "The Flip."  Yes, football (mostly professional but college matters too) is the most popular sport in the country.  But it's their regular season; MLS has conducted its postseason late in the fall.  I will go to lengths to see a postseason Loons Match in person (I have skipped out on Game-watching events in the past) because they are the most important Matches on the schedule, and I think diehard fans of other MLS squads have done and would do the same.

Conversely, the commish also says that putting MLS' playoffs in May is a lot less crowded.  No, it isn't.  The NBA Playoffs and The NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs are also played in May.  Basketball and hockey are not the behemoth that American football is.  But you cannot convince me that soccer has a chance to stick out and rise above the din at a time those two leagues also have their postseasons.  When the Games matter most, MLS will take a backseat to both the NBA and NHL, every Year.  (And hell, to be honest with you, the NHL takes a backseat to the NBA every May, too.)  Major League Soccer is not running from a crowded part of the year; it's running to a crowded part of the year.  And I don't think it's going to work.  So on second blush, I still hate this.

Another point I considered: I thought that there would be Matches played through the winter, and we would thus have to have a few or even several of them played during the holidays.  Then MLS announced that there will be an annual two-Month Winter Break from mid-December to mid-February, and then on top of that there will be special considerations to limit the number of Games played here in December and February to one or two.

But I decided to think further.  What about this Winter Break?  It's good for the safety of players and fans, no doubt.  But what sports league do you know builds in a two-Month break in its season?  Wouldn't that feel like two separate seasons?  And what happens if, for example, MNUFC just sucks for the first part of the Year?  Would anyone want to come back and see the final part of the season if the Loons blow?  (Major League Soccer anticipates that 2/3 of the season is completed before Winter Break and the final third is completed once play resumes and into the end of April, which is supposed to be when the regular season will end.)  This has the potential to be a momentum killer.

Another point of concern comes in the fall.  I am very busy during American football season.  I work Vikings and Golden Gophers Games, and I organize Game-watching parties for my alma mater.  These conflicts have been in place since Minnesota United started MLS play in 2017, so it's nothing new.  Still, it's a pain in the ass to, for example, wait for when my alma mater announces the time of their Game in two Weeks and figure out whether I could travel from downtown Minneapolis to Midway to see my Loons, or if it's worth it to catch only the Second Half of the MNUFC Match, or if I need to sell my ticket.  Usually, one to three of my season tickets are casualties to these circumstances each year.

The announcement didn't say, but I wonder, assuming there will be at least as many Matches in a regular season as there currently are now, if there will be more Matches played in the fall.  So I have looked at the upcoming season, looked through my Franklin Quests for the past few years, and jotted down how many autumn Matches there have been from 2022 to this season, which would be ones subject to either work or play conflicts due to American football.

2026 home Games in the fall I have to worry about skipping: 5

2025: 3

2024: 3

2023: 4

2022: 1

There are tons of caveats here.  Major League Soccer has frequently shifted their seasons, and put in breaks during the middle of them, if there have been other worldwide soccer conflicts, such as the World Cup and continental tournaments, so there will be years more Matches had to be piled into the autumn.  Also, I wanted to go back all the way to 2017, but I realized that 2021 and 2020 were severely impacted by the pandemic -- I couldn't go at all in 2020, and I think I started going to Games late in the summer of 2021 -- and so it didn't make sense to go back even further.  Finally, we don't have the 2027-8 schedule out yet, of course, so we don't know if there will be a concentration of Matches in the fall.  Still, while I have no evidence this will get worse under the new calendar, I will go with my gut and believe it will be.

But I realized something further. It may not be the fall that impacts my season-ticket status the most, but the summer.  Major League Soccer says it'll conduct its postseason in May, and the league will begin its new season in mid-July.  Assuming MNUFC won't host Games for the playoffs or even make the playoffs (and I would contend that the league is rapidly creating a Haves/Have-nots hierarchy not unlike The English Premier League, and undoubtedly my Loons ain't gonna be a Have), there won't be Matches for me to go to between May and mid-July.

How many Matches have taken place in that time period?  I went back through my FQs and checked:

2026 home Games between May (the scheduled month for postseason, which the Loons obviously are not guaranteed to play, let alone play any home Matches) and mid-July (the approximate start of the new season format): 3

2025: 6

2024: 6

2023: 6

2022: 5

More caveats here.  The three Matches this season is because MLS needs to take a break for the World Cup.  Also, Minnesota United FC salespeople have been trying to emphasize they are going to fill this hole with pre-season Matches and Friendlies against clubs from other countries, which should be easier once MLS' preseason aligns with so many other leagues' preseasons.  But you can tell that it's not the same.  I actually love going to Loons Games during the late spring and early summer.  There's not much to do, the weather is heating up, and I have enjoyed many Matches with other Loons fans this time of Year.

And then I realized that this is the part of the season that I will miss, and that this is the reason why this new calendar sucks.  And there is little to no chance that there will be any attempt that will be adequate to fill this hole.  So now what?  Well, first of all, because I care about the integrity of the season, I would like to suggest a split-season not unlike what Mexico's Liga MX does.  Every Year they have, basically, two Years: An "Apertura" (opening) season that goes from July to just before the holidays, and a "Clausura" (closing) season that goes from early January to Memorial Weekend.  OK, so you have two champions a Year.  Big deal; that means there is no yawning two-Month gap in a season you're determined to say lasts ten Months.  For this to happen, Major League Soccer would have to have only a one-Month break, and Minnesota United would probably have to play a few Matches in January and February.  Would I watch them in person?  Maybe, maybe not.  But at least the season would make a whole lot more sense.

Beyond that, I don't know what to think.  Well, I said a long time ago that unless I die, move, lose my job, or determine the organization has done something that so offends my moral code, I won't be dropping my season ticket.  I didn't add some sort of force majeure clause when I declared that, but I sure as hell didn't think they'd do The Flip, either.  So I think I'll give it a year, to see how many more Matches I might have to miss in the fall, and how many times from May to mid-July I'll be bored out of my skull because there's no important MNUFC Game to go to.  If it doesn't make sense to spend money on a season ticket -- and that price keeps going up every Year -- maybe I'll be forced to downgrade my season ticket package ... or say goodbye.

Too Much To Do This Week, And I'm Not Doing That Much Because Of ... Well

I totally am happy with seeing my friend who's in town.  She would be, absolutely and every time, my main priority if I have other things I want to do.  And dammit, there are a couple other things I could do this weekend, and I am blog posting about how much I fucking hate that all three goddamn things are here at the same time.

My friend travels for her job.  She was back here in the early fall, but for some family obligations.  That's when she told me she would be in town to work the first full week of January.  That's when I was already formulating in my mind what we could and do when she was back and maybe had more time to do things.

I do not know if it was made before or after my friend told me she would be back in town now, but around this time (I guess) I realized that my alma mater's basketball teams would be playing the U. here this weekend.  First of all, I don't understand how both of my teams are playing here at the same weekend; that's a weird scheduling quirk that I can't believe just lined up that way.  Second, with that, "uh," opportunity, does that mean that both teams travelled here and will travel back on the same plane so they can save money?  But I've gone off on a tangent.  I have to see my alma mater's teams when they play in town ... unless my friend wants to do something else.  But luckily for me, we both went to the same college, so maybe she would want to go to these Games, too?  She said she had time for the men's Game, which was last/Friday night, but not the women's Game, which is tomorrow/Sunday afternoon.  I will presume she can't make it tomorrow because she is busy with work.

Again, I wish these things happened on separate weeks, but I am managing to both go to the Games I want to go to and see my friend.  But there is another thing that I realized is also happening this week, and this I think was scheduled for a year: The Twin Cities Auto Show.  This show was in March for as long as I can remember, with the exception of the COVID years, where I think I didn't go one year and the other year I went when it was held at the State Fairgrounds late spring or early summer.  I always go, but by the time I realized it was happening the same week as my alma mater's b-ball teams and my friend being here for work, I quickly concluded that I can't go.  I'm just too busy and tired.  And (and this could be rationalizing) the auto show has changed since the manufacturers stopped printing out brochures for us to take.  Not saying that I no longer have any fun there, but my stays at the show have shortened because I can't pamphlet-hunt.  I'm not upset that I am passing this up.

Now, all this ICE bullshit is complicating everything.  I haven't yet heard they are in downtown Minneapolis, but I am spooked enough that, if I had the time to go, I would hesitate.  Meanwhile, I invited my friend to this speakeasy tonight.  She might be busy hanging out with another friend.  But I have to be honest and say I am nervous because this place is much closer to the site of that murder by that ICE incel on Wednesday.  Finally, even though I went to the U. last/Friday night and will tomorrow/Sunday afternoon, I am scared of going there too because, who knows, I could be stopped, or worse.

So maybe I shouldn't kvetch over three things all happening at the same time because of fascism.  To be candid, I didn't think my blog post would veer this way.  Oh well.

Ah, Men Who Aren't

So Saturday night, after working the Gopher football Game, I was hanging out with a couple dudes downtown who saw our alma mater's football Game.  They left, but I wanted to hang out a little while longer.

I was standing up scrolling through my phone.  I was the only one of this table that had three chairs; although it was busy, there were other tables around me.  One that was occupied was occupied by a lot of people.  I didn't notice that another person joined them.  He apparently wanted a chair.  He saw the one that was next to me.  And he just took it, and used it to sit down with his friends.

No, he didn't ask me.  And he should've.  Sure, I wasn't using it.  But it was obvious that it was a chair that was at a table I was at, so a quick, "Hey, you using this?" would have sufficed.  That was too much to ask of this guy, who sat his incel ass down and, I think, began scrolling through his phone.

---

It was a bear to drive down the Megamall Black Friday.  The on-ramp to the first highway I hit was backed up, the drive into The Lowry Tunnel was backed up, and my God, the traffic to park at MOA was backed up for half a mile.

I finally parked.  I'm walking in, and I hear these clomping footsteps behind me.  There's this tall White dude who has this IDGAF attitude coming up behind me.  I fling the first door open for him; he keeps it open while not saying thanks.  At this point he's about to clip my heel with his toe, so I open the second door for him.  He doesn't say thanks; he just keeps striding, almost leaving what looks to be his kids in his dust.  I sarcastically give him the thumb's up; it's only comeback I can think of to let him know what I feel about his fast, intrusive walking.

---

There has been a school of thought that video games cause violence.  That idea has been debunked by researched a long time ago, even though I think a lot of people still cling to the notion.  But there has been very small evidence that video games cause aggression.  There are some studies that note a correlation, especially in the short term.

I'm going to be so bold as to believe that video games do cause aggression, and not just in the short term.  I think that the advent of video games coincide with societal coarseness.  I believe that more people have become dicks since video games became popular.  I will go out on a limb that these two arrested development motherfuckers play them, and as a result have no manners and go about life thinking everything's about them, they don't have to wait their turn, and they do whatever they want, fuck everybody else.  A lot of people are like that now, in this country and around the world.  And that's also partially why Trump's in office -- well, that and Russian interference (which Trump asked for, which is illegal) and Musk and social media (also illegal).  And while aggression isn't the same as violence, the former can easily bleed into and beget the latter.  That would be a correlation, wouldn't it?

People scoff at calls to ban or limit video games from the youth until their brains are more fully developed.  Those calls have been proposed to curb violence.  I'm going to say it: Maybe video games should be limited as a way to curb aggression, and then that curb on aggression can lead to a curb in violence.  All things are connected to each other, and in a world that is going mad and is hellbent on screwing the little guy, maybe we need to think about doing that.  Then, maybe these supposedly "frustrated" boys will actually grow the fuck up.

Still fending off this runny nose, and now I see that snow is forecast for today's/Saturday's Gopher Game.  Don't know how much is going to fall, but at least according to my Weather Application, the bulk/worst of it is supposed to fall right during the Game.  I will be outside for good chunks of time; add falling snow and I'm going to be both wet and cold.  And add blowing my nose all day.  Great.

Now I think, or I am reminded, that my runny nose and aching legs is something that seems to happen the weather gets colder or snowier.  And I've been blowing my nose like the dickens all day at work yesterday/Friday.  I thought I had it under control when I went to bed.  This sounds weird, but I could tell the moment, the exact moment, when my sinuses, which was running like a burst dam, completely shut.  I could tell because I don't think I slept at all last night.

Alas, my sinuses got to running again once I got out into the cold, and my nose kept running while I was working.  It's gotten worse since I got home.

Heat, intense heat, has always seemed to shut off my sinuses and snot-running.  I need to do that, but I need to finagle the space heater from Mother's new bedroom, and then, maybe my parents won't like me using so much energy to run the space heater until my room feels like a sauna.  But I work outside at the Gopher football Game Saturday, and I want to shop tomorrow/Friday, and I need to be as healthy as possible, and to do that, I need to warm my body up.

I am cocooning for the next day and a half, and I appreciate doing so instead of being out and about, but I still feel quite crummy, and I can't afford to remain this sick.

This Week Has Sucked/Is Going To Suck

Asked my co-worker yesterday/Sunday about my schedule.  I'm going into the lab weekly now, seems like, goddammit, and I do that tomorrow/Tuesday.

I realized last/Sunday night while exercising that today/Monday I have the MNUFC Playoff Match, and that starts at 8.

That means that I am getting home late from a soccer Match being played late, very late, on a school night, and then I have to wake up early for work the next day.

It's out of my control when I have to report early to work in the lab; it just happens it's the morning after a late soccer Match.  The soccer Match usually isn't played on a Monday night, let alone at fuckin' 8 at night, but it is, and it just so happens to be the night before I have to report early in the next morning.  This constellation of bad timing didn't have to happen.  It took a lot of bad breaks for this shitty situation to occur.  And yet it has.

I fucking hate everything right now.  I'm worried for Mother's surgery, my sister accused me of not flushing the toilet when I did, I didn't get to fuck my sex worker (I think I'll save that for another blog post), I'm scared I'm overworking my car, and most of all, pretty much every single Minnesota sports team got fucking embarrassed, from the Vikings Thursday through the Gopher football team on Saturday and the Gopher men's hockey team this weekend.  And Losses by the Wild (yeah, the Timberwolves won last/Sunday night, but they lost to The Bastard Minneapolis Lakers over the weekend), and I have been in a foul goddamn mood since Thursday and I will be at least until I get to rest tomorrow/Tuesday night.

Till then, everything fucking sucks.

Expenses Without Receipts

Starting from Friday, May 23:

• We need to go back to Saturday, May 17 and Art-A-Whirl.  I finally bought a piece of art -- a small wooden, heart-shaped token with lines on it.  The person who owns the studio in which I bought her token said she designed it with help from some kids in the hospital she works at.  Yes, it's a buck, but I couldn't afford nearly any of the rest of the pieces being sold over the weekend, and I want  feel as though I "participated," you know what I mean?  She also was selling drinks, so I bought this root beer called XXX.  And she was selling it for cheap as well.  The studio owner was really nice.  She even gave me her card that had her contact information.  I e-mailed her, but I don't know if she has e-mailed me back.  Shame.  The token and the root beer cost me only: $3.
• After that I went out to one of the many food trucks surrounding Art-A-Whirl.  I didn't catch this food truck, but I bought elote there.  With tip it set me back: $8.
• Back to Thursday the 1st ... my parents and I were going to have lunch with my niece/their granddaughter.  I bought gift cards for my niece's birthday -- three in total, one I, Mother and Father could each giver her.  Mother thought that wasn't enough, so she suggested we each give her $50 on top of that.  OK, I said, but I thought a clean $50 bill would be better than the $20's and $10 that I had.  She had time to go to the bank, so I gave her money which she took to the bank and converted to one $50 bill, which I then tucked into the pouch along with a gift card that I gave my niece at lunch.  Total, of course: $50.
• We now go allllllllll the way back to Wednesday, April 16 -- I don't know how my day broke down, but I think I first went to Caffetto to work on things.  I bought a Lucky cola, and then I bought a glass bottle of Martinelli's apple juice.  With tip (I think just for the Lucky) I spent: $7.09.
• I think I then went to a house party where I got double-teamed by *****y and *****y.  *****y started kicking my dick through my underwear, then shoved her left tit into my mouth so hard and so long that I was starting to choke.  I wanted to bite her boob hard -- partly to stop her from suffocating me, partly because I wanted to!  While all that was happening, *****y finally pulled down my underwear to finally start jerking me off.  I keep replaying that moment in my head.  It's that image that makes me think that at least *****y was into giving me an HJ, and I find that totally sexy.  Funny enough, by the way, I don't think *****y ever touched my cock, and in fact, in all the times I have gotten naked with her, I don't know if she ever has masturbated me.  Huh.  I could be wrong about this, but I think I paid both the amount of: $240.
• Finally, back on April Fools' Day, I went to the University of Minnesota to do an experiment for the first time in years.  It was a two-part research study.  First, there was a survey asking me the factors which would lead me to go to the post office to return a damaged product.  Then, I was given an (intentionally) broken set of headphones and an envelope with free postage.  It was up to me to go to the post office and send it back.  I guess the researchers were wondering whether I would spend the time and expend the energy to do all that.  I did, the next day.  However, I had the next day off from work.  I had one week to send it back to the researchers.  If I didn't have a day off (including Saturday) to run to the USPS, I wouldn't have sent it back at all.  For all that, I received an Infusion of (OK, I was paid): $20.

Good through May 23.

Thoughts And Prayers To The Spontaneously Pooping Son And His Father

So leaving the baseball Game at the U. last/Saturday night, I stopped by the restroom.  There, there was young boy, maybe 2 or 3, on the Koala Kare bed, and his father in complete apoplexy.  "How do you poop like that?  How??" he was crying in near-agony as (and I didn't look straight at this ... scene) he apparently was using as much toilet paper as possible to, it looks like, wipe the crap out of his boy's ass.

Completely unprompted, he starts venting to me, the only other person in the men's room: "I asked him if he needed to poop.  He said no.  So I tell him to stand outside (I hope he meant away from the stalls; I don't know if it would be wise to tell your young son to stay outside of the bathroom all by himself).  And when I come back, he totally crapped his pants.  And this is like the second or third time today!"

As he told his son, "Man, you gotta get it together," I made my way out.  I didn't know what to say except, "Good luck, man," to which he said, "Yeah, thanks for ..." and he didn't finish his sentence because he didn't really know what to say, either.  "I understand, you have to vent," I said, and I left.

Godspeed to the father and to the incontinent son.

I Get Older, They Stay The Same Age

Do I still get horny seeing young women with their barebellies?  Judging by all the talent I saw at the U. while watching a softball and a baseball Game yesterday, the answer is, fuck yes.

That's all I got.  I'm tired.

Toast-Yays! I Salute You!

Fantastic Frozen Four Final (for the women) yesterday/Sunday afternoon at Ridder.  Ohio St. was up on Wisconsin, 3-2, when, with 18.9 Seconds left, play was whistled dead on a huge scramble in front of the Buckeyes' net.  The Badgers challenged the stoppage; they said an Ohio St. player covered up the puck while it was in the crease.  After review, the officials determined that was the case.  The remedy for that: A Penalty Shot, which Kirsten Simms, a Junior Forward from Plymouth, Mich., deked home for the tie:

Just more than two Minutes into Overtime, Simms put away a rebound for the OT Winner, and Wisconsin (and by the way, Ridder Arena was jam-packed with about 85% Badger fans; the atmosphere was excellent, but seeing Ridder become Madison West has to be fucking disconcerting for the U., and if Mark Coyle doesn't feel ashamed, he should) won its eighth title overall and fourth in the past six seasons.  Great Game -- and I paid only $13, the face value of the ticket, to watch it!

Anyway, as I was leaving, I saw, of all people, a Girl Scout and her mom selling cookies.  Don't know if I would've thought to do that, but what do I know?  Anyway, I am obsessed with the fact that the Toast-Yays! are going to be discontinued after the season.  I've had them before, and I liked them so, to, well, commemorate their "retirement," I had already bought a box.  And you know what?  They're even better than I thought!  The icing is great, but the cookie part is sensational as well.  There's something dusted on top of it, and that really makes each Toast-Yay! pop.

This is an underrated cookie.  If the Girl Scouts stop making Toast-Yays! because they're not selling, well, the people have no taste in good cookies.  So I bought another box, right outside of Ridder.  I'm just about done with the first one, so I'll probably quickly eat my way through the second.

RIP, Toast-Yay!  You have been done dirty.