Farewell, Neighbor (Whom I've Talked To Maybe Twice)

The neighbor across the street is moving.  Have seen some stirrings for a month now, but the "For Sale" sign makes it real.  That came up maybe a week ago.  The huge dumpster (like the one I threw my trash into last week) was on their driveway maybe a couple weeks ago.  And the moving truck was there when I woke up today.

I literally may have spoken ... no, come to think of it, I should accurately describe it as "interacted" with the members of the family that lives/lived there two times.  Once, when my niece was little, one kid who lives there, while he was being held by his father (the head of the household) offered her candy, and my niece freaked out.  The other time, the sons were playing catch (they had baseball uniforms on, so they may have come back from practice or a Game) and a baseball rolled to the edge of my driveway; I threw it back, poorly, to one of them.  And that's it.  I never had an issues with them.  They were the perfect, quiet neighbors who left me alone.

So I feel bad that I'm not saying goodbye to them as they're moving.  But, what would I say?  What kind of small talk could I come up with, especially since I made no talk with any of them while they were here?  And yet, when I came home from shopping earlier this afternoon and I saw the whole family running about, I thought about going there and saying hi.  But, I haven't.  And I probably won't.

Gift Wrapping Is An Unlearnable Skill And A Niche Industry

So it's my niece's birthday.  For once I was proactive in getting the gifts.  The problem now is that I don't know how to wrap them.  I think I had done it while I was really young, but back then I realized how much I sucked at it, so I had Mother do it, or, to be quite honest, I didn't buy a gift at all.  That's right -- I learned not to buy gifts because I didn't learn the art of gift wrapping.

But I'm a grown-up now, and I have a niece to whom I want to show love, so I have to buy presents.  I have been able to avoid this situation because I would always send the presents (in the name of myself and my parents) to her mother/my sister-in-law, who knows how to wrap gifts.  But over the holidays she basically that she was done with all that.  I don't think she meant just me having her wrap gifts.  I think she meant being my brother's wife.  But I don't know that.  But I won't bring it up either.  Bottom line -- I am now on my own when it comes to getting gifts wrapped.

Where in the hell can I go in this town to have this done for me?  Hell, where do I even find just one damn box to put these gifts in?  A couple times a long, long time ago I got them wrapped at, of all place, the Rosedale customer service department.  Hell if I know how they did it, but the people who helped you find out where in the mall to go had this set-up where you could walk up to them, give them gifts that needed to be boxed and wrapped, and they'd do it.  That remains a mind-blowing thing a mall just offers to do, and year-round, not just for the holidays.  Alas, it is a bygone feature of their customer service; they say on their website that they don't do that anymore.

There is one store in the Twin Cities that says they just do gift wrapping.  I left them a message but haven't heard back.  There was also, I believe, a company that picks up and drops off gifts.  That seems way too complicated for my need to have someone find a box and wrap my gifts up in it, but come to think of it, having a brick and mortar spot just for that service probably makes no sense.  Regardless, I e-mailed them -- no response.

Shit, man, I have to do this myself.  I'm now reduced to shopping for boxes.  (I looked in the seldom-opened closet right next to my bedroom; there is wrapping paper in there.)  But wait!  How about a gift bag?  I don't need to wrap anything then; I'll just throw them in a bag, then put some fancy-ish tissue paper on it so my niece can't just peer into the bag and see what I bought her.  I need to buy a bag, but at least there are bags to be bought, unlike boxes!  And I won't get frustrated over cutting out too little wrapping paper, or butchering the folding and taping.  Yeah, gift bags -- that's the ticket!

So I need to buy all that stuff after I wake up.  Hopefully I won't fuck this up.  But maybe I will.

So I finally talked to Mother about the mail.  Niece's birthday is coming up, and Mother remembered that, and she wants me to get money from the bank.  So I'm going to have to line up at the bank this morning.

But that's not something that sets me off.  This sets me off: She says that she'll pay me back ... "when they get home."  GODDAMMIT, DON'T REMIND ME THAT YOU'RE COMING HOME!!!

And Are They Done For Real Or What?

Weird and ominous text I got from my sister-in-law Christmas morning.  As I do with pretty much all my friends and family, I text them on the holidays.  My sis-in-law is someone I'm keen on reaching out to because the only person I give Christmas gifts to is my niece/her daughter.  But since they live so far away, I don't have time to buy and wrap those gifts for her.  It is so, so much easier if I buy what my niece wants on Amazon and have them shipped to their house.

What I didn't know, even though I probably should have thought about it, was that my sister-in-law intercepts the gifts and wraps them up for her daughter/my niece to open them at Christmas.  I guess she's done that every year I've sent gifts to them, and so, when I wished her a Merry Christmas, I thanked her for doing the hard work of wrapping the gifts without my niece (seemingly) knowing.

As she usually does, she sent pictures of my niece opening up the three gifts I got her.  Amazon said that they would come in two shipments and the shipment for one might come after Christmas.  I had told my sister-in-law that could happen (and that has happened before), so I wanted to confirm whether that second shipment with that third gift came in time after all.  (Yeah, it's obvious, but still.)  She never confirmed.  Instead, she said, and I'm paraphrasing, "Welp, next Christmas is going to be different ... and you can talk about it with your brother."

I've spoken about this here before: I've wondered for a long, long time whether my brother and sister-in-law were on the outs.  I've never seen them act like they, well, love each other.  And I don't know if I described this on WAF, but my sister-in-law and I had dinner out several years ago where she just fucking unloaded on him.  She never said she planned on separating from him, though, so it made me wonder if she was blowing off steam or if this is truly a rift that will not heal.

This was, I believe, before we and the whole family went to Hawai'i over the holidays a few years ago.  I thought that if they were going to split up, they would have done so before then because it wouldn't make sense to act like one big, happy family and then announce their separation.  And then I thought that maybe they all wanted an excuse to go to Hawai'i, and then they could drop this bomb after the New Year.  Well, there was no announcement at all, so I just figured they were still together, or limping along in this relationship because they can't overcome inertia.

So what should I make of that text?  There seems to be frustration behind it, so this could be another case of her blowing off steam because, say, my brother said something to her that pissed her off.  Or, this is an announcement months or maybe even years in the making; a separation might finally be in its final stages for some reason, and 2026 is the year the relationship changes -- or ends.  I don't fuckin' know.  I just texted her, "Um, OK," and she didn't respond.

This shit is just too weird, man.

Another Sign I'm A Crappy Uncle

I got really tired yesterday, y'all, really tired.  I didn't think I would be, but I was really draggin' at work in the afternoon.  And after my parents made spaghetti for dinner (yum!), I was going to lay down for a bit and, well, see where my body will take me before The Amazing Race comes on.

When I climb into bed, I get a text from my sister-in-law.  She says my niece is playing in a school concert, and we can watch it live.  If they had told me my niece played an instrument, I completely forgot.

I wanted to watch on my phone.  I really did.  But when I got my text, I was really, really tired.  So I set the phone off to the side and shut my eyes with the promise that, if I woke up by the time the concert started, which was about less than a half-hour after I got the text, I would watch.

I think I set my phone aside and shut my eyes at around 5:45.  I woke up, totally serious, at 10:15.  I was hoping the Vimeo had a "Watch from the beginning" feature, but it doesn't.  So I missed my niece's concert because I was tired af.  I know I need to make a more concerted effort to be present for her events ... but dammit, I was tired.  And probably a bad uncle, too.

I texted my sister-in-law to see if I can see a replay of it online.  Hope so.  Hope she's still talking to me.

Why Doesn't My Sister Just Fuckin' Have My Car, Huh?!

So my sister has been using my car.  It's small and short and thus manageable, unlike the unwieldy and old minivan my parents use.  That van is a warhorse, but it's hard to account for the size, and when I pull out of parking spaces, I'm always fearful that I'll hit something because it's so big.

Well, my sis has been using my car a lot, leaving me to use the minivan, mainly to go to and from work.  She now uses my car to ferry Mother around for physical therapy.  But before she has been using it for frivolous things, like seeing childhood friends and going shopping.  And it looks as though she is getting a little bolder when it comes to requesting it.  Last week she needed it Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, and I figured on Wednesday night that if she needed to use the car to take Mother to PT on Friday, I might as well use the minivan on Thursday as well as Friday.  I transfer the stuff I think I need to take to work with me -- sunglasses, sunvisors, maybe the tire pressure gauge -- into the minivan.  It doesn't make sense to me to use my car for just one day because I would have to shlep all that from the minivan back into my car, and then do the reverse so my sister and Mother could use it on Friday.

It's gotten more ridiculous this week.  Mother has physical therapy Tuesday and Thursday.  Sister said on Saturday that she wanted to use my car on Friday to see my brother and niece.  Finally, last/Sunday night she told me that her friend wants to see her for dinner, an early dinner, on Wednesday.  Well, shit.  If I need to take the minivan from Tuesday to Friday, I might as well fucking take the minivan today/Monday too, right?  So, for this week, it feels as if I own the minivan and my sister owns what used to be my car.  I should probably transfer the title to her since she's using it so goddamn much.

Fuckin' Christ, I think I transferred all my stuff from the van into the car, too.  I'll have to wake up early to dump all that shit back into the van.  Fuck me.  Oh yeah: I am annoyed, and my sister knows it, and she likes that I'm annoyed.  Pffft.

Addendum To: General (Car-Centered) Anxiety

I checked my coolant overflow tank Tuesday and I think it's below the "MAX" line.  Maybe; the tank is in a place that's surrounded by other parts, so it's hard to take a level look at the line, so I'm eyeballing it from above.  That's why I kind of think that it's been at that level, whatever that level is, for some time.  Well, I know that it was well above "MAX" once, and now it may or may not be below it, but it may have been around "MAX" for some time.  Does that make sense?

I still worry because not only will my sister put my car through its paces all around town as she's shuttling Mother to surgery and rehab for the next few weeks, I/we will be driving it places, too.  We're meeting our brother and niece tonight/Friday night for dinner and some escape room frivolity.  Then on Sunday I decided to go down and visit ****e for some sexytime (and to calm her down; the way she describes it, a donation through her phone turned into an identity theft attempt, and she had to wipe her phone, thus deleting all her contacts).  I could use this break right before Mother goes under the knife.  I just hope the car can withstand the punishment it's been getting, and not just with the coolant.

My Biggest Accomplishment In, Oh, Years

I did my first escape room (with my sister) Sunday; we failed.  My brother set up another escape room last/Friday night ... and the four of us (we three siblings and my brother's daughter, my niece) got out!  I'm not sure exactly how we got out, and I still suspect that the, uh, overseer opened doors for us (in a literal sense) even though we hadn't yet solved the puzzles because he just wanted us to get out of there.  But we made it!  Really, I don't think I've done something so successful in a decade!

Something Fun Shouldn't Be This Fucking Inconvenient

So I am doing this escape room with my brother, sister and niece tonight.  I want to look forward to it because it's, well, a fun thing to do, and I am doing something with my siblings, and I don't remember the last time I've ever done anything fun with them, let alone my niece.

Doing it tonight, however is a pain in the ass.  I work in The Fourth Position today, all by myself.  I need to get the work done because there is nobody else doing it today, and no one doing that job at all tomorrow.  For that reason, there is a chance I will be late.  I communicated my worry with my sibs.  But instead of offering a compromise, my brother just bought the goddamn tickets for tonight on his own.  I will probably have to leave stuff for one of my co-workers to do tomorrow, and that's not a good feeling to saddle someone with work to do when you had the chance to do it yourself.  I certainly wouldn't want one of them drop crap on my lap, but turnabout is fair play, and that is what I'm going to invite if I don't do all the work by myself today.

I have a Friday off coming up.  We certainly could have done the escape room then.  I can't see why we couldn't wait and do it then.  But nope, my brother said we're playing Friday.  So I have to fucking drop every goddamn thing and race to the escape room.  And I guess I shouldn't complain too much because my brother's the one buying the tickets, huh?

Moreover, my plan was to leave work early, go home, grab my sister and then go.  Going from work to home takes me in the opposite direction of the escape room, but that seemed to be the only way for all of us to play this game.  (It also necessitated me leaving work early if need be.)  This is the part that pisses me off.  While watching my alma mater's women's soccer team, I WhatsApped my sister that if I am able to get home in time, we have to immediately leave home to get to the escape room on time.  Then, she countered that she wants to go to the mall by herself.  She needs time to do that.  And, she wants to take my car.  I would then take my parents' very old van and meet her and my brother and my niece at the mall and the escape room in the evening.  Well, shit.

Being blindsided by her decision the day before fucking sucks.  I had to spend five minutes after I got home from the soccer Match taking out all the stuff I need to drive to work (sunglasses, sun visor, tire gauge to check the minivan's tires).  Also, this is the second time this week I've had to settle on the van while she gets to drive the newer car.  I sleep for lunch, and that's very hard to do in the van because the sun streams in through the windows; it gets hot and the radiation burns my skin.  It's no problem in my car because I have window shields that are fitted for my car's windows.  I obviously don't have them for the minivan, so I will probably be tired by the time we start the escape room because I haven't had my midday nap.  But worst of all is that I have to take this minivan in afternoon rush to the Mall of America.  Truthfully, I have no reason to believe it won't make it down there and back.  But it is a very old car, and I haven't driven it that far in some time, let alone driving it during afternoon rush.  There are certain aspects of this drive that will be foreign to me, and I hate needing to "learn" like this when my sister didn't have to shop by herself, and my brother didn't have to make the escape room tonight.  In other words, I think I am going to get into a car crash, or the van's engine is going to overheat, and I will fail to make it to the escape room.  It just feels like everything is getting set up this way.

Hate this.  Hate this all.  And I'm supposed to be having fun tonight, not feeling inconvenienced!

Saves Me A Trip

I am still embarrassed by what happened at work yesterday/Saturday, so ashamed that I can't bring myself to even blog post about it.  So I will look at the bright side and note that my sister-in-law (she still is that, isn't she?) stopped by to pick up the gifts Mother gave my niece, as well as egg rolls.  Now, I don't have to drive all the way the heck down there to drop them off.  Whew.

When Do I Have To Do The Long Drive?

So my boss yesterday/Thursday asked if I could come in to work tomorrow/Saturday and, after trying to think if there was anything I absolutely had to do and coming up empty, I said yes.

But there is something I kinda could have done tomorrow/Saturday.  Last week Mother asked me to drive all the way down to my brother's place and give my niece presents she asked my folks to get for her.  I don't enjoy a 45-minute drive, but I was prepared to do it.  Last week my sister-in-law told me they were out of town, so this weekend would've been the "perfect" time to do it ... until I volunteered to come in and work.  I guess I could still do it tomorrow/Saturday; it would just have to be after work and probably after dinner.  Or, I could do it Sunday before the Gold Cup Matches.  But if I had to drive all the way down to my niece's, I prefer it to be the only thing I do that day.  And that plan is ruined unless either 1) I get to do this drive possibly next weekend (I might be busy then, too) or 2) they come up here and get the gifts from us.  The latter would be a huge burden off my chest, but it probably won't happen.

Expenses Without Receipts

Starting from Friday, May 23:

• We need to go back to Saturday, May 17 and Art-A-Whirl.  I finally bought a piece of art -- a small wooden, heart-shaped token with lines on it.  The person who owns the studio in which I bought her token said she designed it with help from some kids in the hospital she works at.  Yes, it's a buck, but I couldn't afford nearly any of the rest of the pieces being sold over the weekend, and I want  feel as though I "participated," you know what I mean?  She also was selling drinks, so I bought this root beer called XXX.  And she was selling it for cheap as well.  The studio owner was really nice.  She even gave me her card that had her contact information.  I e-mailed her, but I don't know if she has e-mailed me back.  Shame.  The token and the root beer cost me only: $3.
• After that I went out to one of the many food trucks surrounding Art-A-Whirl.  I didn't catch this food truck, but I bought elote there.  With tip it set me back: $8.
• Back to Thursday the 1st ... my parents and I were going to have lunch with my niece/their granddaughter.  I bought gift cards for my niece's birthday -- three in total, one I, Mother and Father could each giver her.  Mother thought that wasn't enough, so she suggested we each give her $50 on top of that.  OK, I said, but I thought a clean $50 bill would be better than the $20's and $10 that I had.  She had time to go to the bank, so I gave her money which she took to the bank and converted to one $50 bill, which I then tucked into the pouch along with a gift card that I gave my niece at lunch.  Total, of course: $50.
• We now go allllllllll the way back to Wednesday, April 16 -- I don't know how my day broke down, but I think I first went to Caffetto to work on things.  I bought a Lucky cola, and then I bought a glass bottle of Martinelli's apple juice.  With tip (I think just for the Lucky) I spent: $7.09.
• I think I then went to a house party where I got double-teamed by *****y and *****y.  *****y started kicking my dick through my underwear, then shoved her left tit into my mouth so hard and so long that I was starting to choke.  I wanted to bite her boob hard -- partly to stop her from suffocating me, partly because I wanted to!  While all that was happening, *****y finally pulled down my underwear to finally start jerking me off.  I keep replaying that moment in my head.  It's that image that makes me think that at least *****y was into giving me an HJ, and I find that totally sexy.  Funny enough, by the way, I don't think *****y ever touched my cock, and in fact, in all the times I have gotten naked with her, I don't know if she ever has masturbated me.  Huh.  I could be wrong about this, but I think I paid both the amount of: $240.
• Finally, back on April Fools' Day, I went to the University of Minnesota to do an experiment for the first time in years.  It was a two-part research study.  First, there was a survey asking me the factors which would lead me to go to the post office to return a damaged product.  Then, I was given an (intentionally) broken set of headphones and an envelope with free postage.  It was up to me to go to the post office and send it back.  I guess the researchers were wondering whether I would spend the time and expend the energy to do all that.  I did, the next day.  However, I had the next day off from work.  I had one week to send it back to the researchers.  If I didn't have a day off (including Saturday) to run to the USPS, I wouldn't have sent it back at all.  For all that, I received an Infusion of (OK, I was paid): $20.

Good through May 23.

Don't Have Time ... Now I Have Time ... No, Now I Don't

Man, have I got a splitting headache.  Think I got it after sleeping in my car for almost half an hour after MNUFC got obliterated yesterday/Sunday afternoon.  Anyway ...

... I was going to see The Accountant 2 Wednesday afternoon, the second of two days I had off this week.  But I took back my paid time off for both days -- I'll say why later -- and so I obviously can't go at that time.  I had time to go to the theater I was going to see the movie after the MNUFC Loss, so I wanted to make sure it was OK for me to switch.  Now, this is not my hometown theater.  I have asked to see the movie I bought a ticket online for at a screening different than the one I paid for, and they were totally OK with it.  But the guy I spoke to said I had to talk with Atom, the application through which I bought the ticket.  Weird.

I didn't have to "talk" to Atom.  Instead, the means to cancel the ticket was right there, and I did.  I have $5 in credit to see any other movie I want to see at any time I want now.  I was planning to see The Accountant 2 this/Monday evening, well after work, though.  I was kind of bummed out about that because I told my parents I would be eating out.  But what do I do now that I can't go to a movie I planned on going to?

And then I remembered that we are seeing my niece (and her two parents) Saturday.  I have been fretting for some time when I could get my hair cut and my face shaved.  Doing that this week would be next to impossible considering I am routinely working so late, every barbershop is probably closed by the time I get done with work.  But I think I need to look presentable to my niece, so I have to find time to get my hair cut and my face shaved.  And you know, cancelling the movie means I can do it tonight!

One problem: Severe weather is forecast for the evening.  And when I say severe, I mean severe.  They have that 1-to-5 scale of predicting how bad the severe weather could be.  I usually see the Twin Cities at a 1, maybe a 2 on occasion.  Tonight/Monday night, we're at a 4.  I thought 4's were only reserved for states south of here.  This is the first time I have seen the Twin Cities at risk for moderate severe weather, and that scares the hell out of me.  If it's going to be that bad out there, I don't know if I should get groomed.  Maybe I should head for home, or maybe even camp out at work until the storm blows over.  Either way, I feel like I'm taking a massive risk going out after work just to get to get my hair cut and my face shaved so my niece doesn't think I'm a slob.  What bad timing.

I Have To Admit -- I'm Really Starting To Resent Them Coming Here

Yeah, it's the disruption, the (kind of) lack of privacy, and, once again, my sister's need to make things all about her.  She gets that way sometimes, but mostly on big occasions where she's the center of attention, and it pisses me off.

The last time she was here she wanted all the suitcases we have stowed in her bedroom out of her bedroom, and she wanted all her bedsheets washed.  Now, I think normal family members would of course do that for her, and wouldn't need prompting.  I am not normal.  I could sleep in dusty bedsheets for all I care.  I just need a clean damn bed.  But no, she wants what she and my brother-in-law are going to sleep in all clean and fresh-smelling, even if they're only going to be here a week and a half.

And I think I touched on this before, but this dinner in St. Paul on Sunday is really grinding my gears.  First of all, my sister wants to use my car, and I'm going to give it to her.  Also, it seems really damn inconvenient for one group of people who are staying in this house to go out to St. Paul and then have the people who live in the same house go out to St. Paul later that same day.  And then my folks told me on Saturday that the minivan, the vehicle I will purportedly be using whenever my sister and brother-in-law want to use my car, had its headlights short out.  I had to buy them on Amazon; they might get here before they get here, and they might not.  And on top of all that, I realized that the Wild are playing in St. Paul on Sunday, and around the same time as the early dinner.  I am not that familiar with St. Paul, and now I have to worry about getting stuck in hockey traffic, too??

Once I realized the minivan had no night lights and I'd have to deal with Wild traffic on Sunday, I obsessed over it all day at work yesterday/Monday -- like, distractingly so.  I really do love my sister and brother-in-law, and I really want to spend some time with my niece, who is the reason my sis and bro-in-law are taking my car on Sunday.  But I hate, hate, hate these dinner plans the more I learned what I have to deal with.  I could feel my body well up with rage and anxiety and dread and helplessness because I feel forced to do something I really, really don't want to do.

And then it hit me: If I don't want to go, don't go.  At first that thought was insane.  I don't see my niece a whole lot as it is.  If I don't see her on this opportunity, I don't know when I'll see her again.  Also, has she noticed how seldomly I see her?  If I make the decision not to go, well, she has to know, and what will she think of me?  But as I kept thinking yesterday ... you know, my sister did raise the idea that I didn't have to go.  And I am such an incorrigible bastard that I might say, yeah, screw it, I'll see you guys some other time, tell my niece I say hi.  Frankly, I'm leaning that way right now.  It is selfish and self-centered of me, but once I started being more accepting of that decision, a weight was lifted off of me.  And I would do anything for peace of mind, even ditching family.

So I texted her my concerns.  I asked her if our parents wanted to go to dinner and she said yeah.  Guess I should have talked to them directly since, you know, I live with them.  Anyway, my thoughts are moot if they want to go; I can't not go if they're going.  Then again, their desire to go to dinner on Sunday may be moot if Amazon can't deliver these headlight bulbs in time.  (Yes, they can go to a store to get them, but Father did that on Saturday, and he's so goddamn cheap that when I told him we could get bulbs through Amazon for less than half the price he got them at Wal-Mart, he immediately went back and returned them.)  My sister couldn't foresee this shitshow, but in a shitshow like this, maybe this isn't a good idea, you know?  But these fucking plans are going through, and I have to be the dutiful brother/son and just fucking fall in line, no matter the stress and stupidity of the whole thing.

Doing Things With Family Is Supposed To Be Fun

So my sister and brother-in-law are coming home soon to visit.  They obviously have plans -- seeing their friends, seeing my niece, visiting landmarks around the Twin Cities and the state -- and that requires using a car, namely mine because it's newer than my parents' minivan.

Several hours ago she texted me about plans, which are getting more concrete in her head.  The Vikings Game I was going to work was flexed to Sunday night, so that means I'm free that day.  My sister thought that she could take my car to the Science Museum for a day with our niece.  I thought that with me being free now, I could go.  But she intimated that she thought it would be a day of just the three of them alone.  That's fine.  I'm not upset.

The thing that annoys me now, however, is that plans are taking shape for a big dinner that evening in St. Paul.  There are a couple complications that I'm still trying to figure out, and because of that I am kind of peeved.  For one: We are not going together.  Rather, they (my sister, brother-in-law and niece) are going to hang out at the Science Museum and then saunter over to St. Paul because the plan is for the dinner to be early.  My brother and sister-in-law are supposed to drive all the way over there from their home.  And we three (my parents and I) are supposed to drive from home to there.  That brings up the second complication: The minivan only seats two.  It was a work van from its days bringing deliveries from The Store to our vendor/clients, so one day, Father just ripped out the back seats.  They're in our basement now, but I don't know how or even if it's possible to put one of them back in.  So if he can't, what are we supposed to do, have just one of them ride on the floor of the van and get jostled around as we go across the river?

This is where a third car, namely a rental car, would be perfect.  As I've blog posted about before, getting one for a weekend would be perfect in order for them to do all that they want, especially if they want to go somewhere beyond the metro area.  But that would be the second weekend, not the first weekend, which is when the Science Museum and dinner are going to be held.  Them taking my niece to the Science Museum would be fine.  It's dinner that is royally screwing everything up.  Having dinner that Sunday instead would be better, even perfect, because it is my sister and brother-in-law's last day here.  And if we had a rental car, we would have a roomy vehicle for all of us to go wherever we want to go for dinner (and this would assume that my niece would be going with her parents, which are my brother and sister-in-law).

But nope, that won't happen.  Apparently, my brother has already made the reservation.  This planning seems so damn inefficient, and it makes us make inconvenient choices for some days that will also result in huge gaps of nothing to do in other days.  Such a stupid waste.  And now, I need to end this blog post because if I keep writing, I will only get more upset.

But Do We Have To Take My Car?

So my sister and brother-in-law are visiting us very soon.  They're staying a week and a half, and I don't have to tell that it's going to be another adjustment that I may or may not get used to before they leave.  I love them, don't get me wrong.  But I like having the house all to myself so I can just, you know, be me.  I just realized, for example, that I might need to take my jerk-off towel into storage just in case either of them want to snoop around my closet while I'm at work.  I don't think I'd be able to touch myself anyway while they're here; my sister's bedroom shares a wall with mine.  We've had conversations through the wall because neither of us wanted to get out of our beds.

She called Father on Sunday, and then he gave me the phone so I could talk to her.  She is really excited to come home (even though she has vowed never to live here ever again), and she already has some things she wants to do while here (besides catching up with friends, of course).  But, surprisingly, they're big.  She wants to take my niece to the Science Museum.  She wants to visit the Paul Bunyan statue in Bemidji.  She wants to take our parents to the Spam Museum in Austin.  And she wants to do all that while driving my car.

Well ... not to say that my car is running bad.  Far from it; ever since my mechanic ripped out the casing around my catalytic converter, it's actually been running like a dream.  But I'm paranoid, you see, and I don't know if this car can handle one four-hour round trip, let alone two of them, and maybe throw in a 2 1/2 hour-one where she needs to drive all the way out to Carver County to pick up my niece, then drive all the way the heck out to St. Paul, and then bring her back to my brother and sister-in-law's place.  What if something happens?

So I thought of something, and it came about through some good fortune, if you want to call it that.  I'm totally free the second weekend they're here.  I have that Friday off because I have some paid time off I need to use and that was one of the only remaining dates till the end of the year that I could use it on.  (In fact, the only set date I have while these two are here is a reservation for three at a critically-acclaimed restaurant in downtown Minneapolis Friday evening.)  My alma mater is on its second bye that Saturday (the way they've been playing, they've had, like, six byes), so I don't have to organize a Game-watching event.  And the Vikings are on the road, so I don't have to work Sunday.  Theoretically, the three of us, and maybe even all five of us if you want to count our parents, could just spend the weekend going all over the state of Minnesota.  But, there is a rental car place within walking distance.  Why don't we (or maybe I) rent a car for the weekend?  That way, we could use the rental to drive to Bemidji and Austin and maybe even St. Paul, and I won't have to worry about the advanced wear-and-tear on my beautiful, precious car.

Come to think of it, renting a car isn't contingent on me having a free weekend.  Well, it still seems like a great idea to me, so I am going to broach this idea to my sister soon.  I think it'll go over well!

Expenses Without Receipt

I'm only blog posting this because right now, I have nothing to say.  But at least I'm catching up now as opposed to six weeks or even eight months later.  Starting from Saturday, May 18:

• We need to go back to Saturday, May 11, where, kind of out of the blue, I got my car washed.  Charged the wash but had enough cash for the tip, which was: $3.
• Then, back to Friday, March May 3, when I stored back-to-back mint dollar bills.  My rule is to keep them if I have three of them with consecutive serial numbers, but for some reason I decided to break that rule.  So, I have stored: $2.
• And I am putting in my birthday gift to my niece in this day as well, even though I technically gave this to her two days later, when we had our belated birthday party for her.  We as a family have largely given up on giving gifts period, but when we do, we just give cash.  My niece was down with it.  She's learning.  Gave her: $100.
• ETA on May 25, 2024 at 6:05 p.m. that I apparently forgotten a way-before EWR.  On Friday, April 19, I went to the local barber school and got a shave.  The guy was so good that I tipped five bucks, which I've never done before.  Total for the shave: $14.

Finally, blog posted a short EWR.  Good through May 18.

I Am A Hypocritical Gift Giver

Just bought my niece her presents at Amazon.  They should arrive at her/my brother's place in a week.

I bought her some of the gifts she wanted (which her mother/my maybe-still sister-in-law texted to me).  That's the best way for me to buy gifts for Christmas: I ask someone what he or she wants, and I give it to him or her.  It's better than me trying to figure out something that person would like, because I never know what he or she likes, and so the gift will be worthless to him or her.  I have bad memories of giving gifts to people, and they cannot hide their reaction of, "Ooooooh, great ... yeah, thanks for this," and my heart immediately sinks.

Possibly an in-between case that happened at work.  Our departments put out calls for a Secret Santa last week.  My supervisor handed over this piece of paper to which our Secret Santa will either get inspiration from or directly buy a gift; we will hand them out just before Christmas.  As the deadline was approaching I finally got around to reading this cheat sheet for my giver as well as the general guidelines.  The cheat sheet wasn't direct: It had vague themes such as, "My favorite scent is," and "If there was one thing I've been obsessed over all year, it's," etc.  The guidelines gave the parameters of the gift giving: Nothing over 30 bucks ... and no gift cards.

Dammit.  Our department didn't do a Secret Santa last year.  Instead, my supervisor just put up little stockings for each of us and encouraged all of us to drop small presents into them before Christmas.  I thought this was a great idea, so I bought a bunch of $20 gift cards from Target and wedged them in (the stockings were smaller than the width of the gift cards).  Maybe it was overkill, but I thought it was a great pick-me-up for the holidays (even though I was not there because I was doing my family vacation over the holidays in Hawai'i).

I decided not to do the Secret Santa.  Partially it was because I didn't know if I wanted to spend the time looking for a gift for someone who was not family.  Partially it was because I was looking at the cheat sheet and felt overwhelmed.  I don't know if I want my Secret Santa to know this stuff about me, I thought to myself.  But honestly, I think my decision not to do it comes from my feeling that I did not want to be confined to getting gifts for which I had no input.  I think I am of the mind that if you know what you want, why don't you get it yourself?

And obviously that mindset is ... well, dick-ish for this time of year, but also hypocritical.  For one, I need my niece to tell me what she wants me to give her.  Isn't my hypothetical recipient just doing the same thing?  And for another, I feel like a damn heel for not doing the Secret Santa while lustfully tossing money around for my co-workers last year.  Gift cards are an easy gift to give, maybe too easy.  But I felt good doing it because it was my idea, and my gift to you -- even though I gave you no say in what I am going to give you.  Isn't gift giving supposed to be for the person receiving the gift, not the one giving it?  That should be the case.  And if so, why in the fuckety-fuck do I have a problem giving someone a present he or she wants?

I feel absolutely awful now for not participating in the Secret Santa at work.  Moreover, I feel bad for giving out all those Target gift cards last holiday season and then not participating in the Secret Santa at work this holiday season.  My co-workers know about what I did last year and decided not to do this year, and my co-workers will probably think that I am at the very least strange and at the very worst a freakin' Grinch.  And they, I'm afraid, wouldn't be wrong.

The Car Is Getting A Workout

What I suspected, and feared, as my sister stays for the week is coming true: My car is going to get a workout.  She drove all the way to my brother's place to spend the afternoon with my niece and give her her belated birthday presents from the family.  That's 45 minutes there and back.  And that's just the start.  She obviously has family and friends she wants to see, and they're scattered all throughout the Twin Cities.  I don't know if she's even tall enough to reach the pedals of the minivan, plus I don't know if she feels safe in a 23-year-old minivan.  So, unless she wants to stay home one of these days this week, she's going to take my car while I take the minivan to and from work every day this week.

I don't mind.  My car was just worked on, and besides the rear shocks and the battery cables getting a little creaky (so says the mechanic I just tried for the first time a couple weeks ago), it's as good as it'll be.  But I am dying to check the oil to see if it's leaking like I'm paranoid that it is.  And besides, that car is going to go all over the place, so the miles on the odometer will be ticking like no one's business.  My sis is going to give it a workout while she's here.  And hopefully it'll stay strong by the time I take her to the airport ... which is over half an hour away ... in my car.

The Air Quality Double Bind

This is, without a doubt, the worst air Minnesota has ever seen.  And the air quality isn't going to get better for a while.

I keep forgetting this because it happens only every summer, but for the past, oh, five-to-ten summers, wildfires from Canada and the western United States has been blown this way, creating haze and, in extreme cases, conditions where sensitive groups will have trouble breathing.  But this past week or so, dammit, it's been something else.  There's a hell of a lot of smoke, and little wind from the south to push it all away.  So for the past several days we have had a thick blanket of haze that has gotten to the point where I notice it affecting me.

It got really scary Thursday night.  After work, I decided I wanted to watch the NBA Draft at Hooters Mall Of America, then swing by Burnsville to see if ****e is still living there.  Driving back (the garage door was open, but the lights inside weren't on, which to me meant a guy was there), under a blood orange sunset but a lattice of dust in the air, I started to hyperventilate -- just a bit, but my heart was racing.  To me, even though the temperature dipped, it was still hot and humid enough for me to turn on the air conditioning in the car, and that brought in the outside air which my lungs apparently didn't agree with.  So I turned off the AC and recirculated the air, and I suddenly felt better, but warmer.  Warm enough whereby I needed to cool off, so I went back to outside air and turned on the AC again, and I cooled down but started to breath in the dirty air.  I don't think I'm being a hypochondriac, but a few cycles of this while driving up from the south, and I started to get scared that I literally wasn't going to make it home before passing out behind the wheel.

I made it, but alarmingly, Father decided to not only not turn on the AC (even though we have air filters!), he opened up the windows, too -- you know, to let the air in.  Jesus fucking Christ, what is he doing?  And so I'm in a double bind in my room similar to one in my car: I have kept my bedroom window closed to keep out the polluted air, but I slept in just my underwear because I'm too hot, and I have decided that's better than opening up my window to cool off with air that might choke me to death.

I'm writing this now in the afternoon with the window still closed, and I'm still bleepin' hot.  Meanwhile my parents have all the windows open, for God's sake, probably because my brother and niece are here.  Good thing I bought some masks last night at Home Depot.  There was ample supply of them, too, which I find odd.

Anyway, the Air Quality Warning which had been in place from Wednesday till Friday afternoon (which itself was on the heels of an Excessive Heat Warning) was extended Friday afternoon till Tuesday.  At its worst, on Thursday, the air looked as bad as Beijing.  It was better yesterday, and it's better today, but that doesn't mean it's good.  And it'll stay bad for the next few days.  And, in the long term, these wildfires are going to be a part of every Minnesotan summer -- probably, due to climate change, forever.  I hope I live through this, because this is a particular kind of weather problem: How do you get away from the air you need to live?