Tuesday, August 25, 2026

Addendum To: Addendum To: Fucking Sprinkler Head ...

There was such little work that, even though I came in early, I got done at 2.  Another sign that I should try and fix the sprinkler head!

The old and busted one worked, or "worked."  I just wanted to know if the head would stay screwed in, and it did.  (I also saw, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that it's broken; the inside sprung out of its case so much that is began spurting water from behind, and not just from the small hole in the front.  That's the reason why there was such a flood around the part of the backyard it was in.)  So it wasn't the pipe but the sprinkler.  I breathed a sigh of relief that all I need to do was buy a new sprinkler head ... but I decided to try and put in the one that was in the hole, just one more time.  I made sure it was screwed in ... and it worked, perfectly.  Well, I have to adjust the arc again, but besides that, I am where I was Sunday afternoon before I yanked the whole damn thing out.  I don't know how it worked now.  Like I've said, I screwed it in before, I swear.  But it, well, works now.

I'll turn on the cycle Saturday afternoon at the duration I want it to run.  If there are no problems then (Lord willing), I have fixed yet another cycle of sprinkler heads!

Addendum To: Fucking Sprinkler Head ...

So since I got out of work on time (and I don't know the last time that happened when I was tasked to do The Fourth Department), I figured this was an opportunity to go back to working on the fucking sprinkler head.

The first time I turned on the cycle it was worse than Sunday.  Not only did the shitty head pop out from the pipe, one of the other heads didn't pop up and water.  I presumed that this sprinkler system relies on pressure, so that when this shitty head popped out of its socket, there wasn't enough pressure for this other one to rise up and do its thing.  But this shitty head popped out on Sunday, and that other head worked just fine.

Anyway, after putting a wood pallet into my second storage unit, I came back and took another shot.  I made damn sure the sprinkler head was screwed into the pipe opening.  I pulled it up to make sure it was secure.  I turned on the system ... and I'll be goddamned, the head was just floating in its hole because it popped out of the goddamn pipe opening again.  (By the way, the sprinkler head that wasn't working earlier in the evening popped up and watered like it was supposed to, so there's that.)

I'm beside myself right now.  Swear to fucking God that thing was screwed in tight.  So I'm working on another theory, though I might be doing so just because any alternative would drive me up a wall.  Maybe, when I yanked the whole fuckin' thing off of the pipe, I broke the sprinkler head.  I took a close look and it, well, looks like the thing isn't retracting completely.  And for all I know, the threads (either on the bottom of the sprinkler head or on the pipe opening) were stripped, either through me or through years of wear and tear.

So what I'm going to do (possibly tomorrow since I work and presumably get home early) is take the old and busted sprinkler head and replace it with the old and busted sprinkler head I replaced in the backyard.  Yes, it's not working, and yes, it's just been laying around the past several weeks.  But what I'm worried about right now is if the issue with that sprinkler head is the sprinkler head or the opening it's supposed to be secured to.  If it's the head, I can just buy another one, and many of my problems would be solved.  But if the fucking thing pops out again ... well, I might need to call in the lawn maintenance company.  There is a bunch of dirt in the opening, and try as I might, I couldn't completely clear out the pipe.  It's possible that dirt is creating such a build-up of pressure that it's going to turn any sprinkler head that's screwed onto it into a projectile missile.  And so if it needs to be cleaned out, that'll require equipment, expertise, and patience I don't have.

God, I just hope a new sprinkler head will do the trick.  Fuckin' Christ, man, if I had just waited for the cycle to end, I think I could've kept the old sprinkler head and the cycle would have been perfect because there would be no water splashing onto the driveway or street.  Fuck!

Monday, August 24, 2026

Fucking Sprinkler Head ...

I thought I knew what I was doing after I fixed (I think) two others.  Next up was checking the arcs for a different cycle, also in the front yard.  Yesterday/Sunday afternoon I did, and I was OK with all but one, which was arcing in both directions so much that it was clearly wetting our driveway twice.

Learning what I learned before, I made sure to wait until the water got absorbed into the dirt enough to clearly twist off the head.  I oriented the arc so that its right-most would line up with the edge of the grassline bordering the driveway and no farther.  From there, I put in the key that shortens the arc to its left.  I had the cycle going on for 15 minutes, giving me plenty of time to see how far this head would go and either cut it or lengthen it so that it wouldn't sprinkle water on the driveway.

And I got it done.  It was perfect.  So, I pulled the key out of the top of the sprinkler head ... and the goddamn, motherfucking whole thing came out.  Without the sprinkler head, the water was coming out of just the open end of a pipe, so it just looked like water coming out of the ground.  I needed to stop it; fortunately, by the time I got to the garage, there was only one minute left in the cycle.  Water dribbled its way down to the street, but it stopped before it got really, really bad.

Swear to God I screwed it in.  But I have to admit that I had trouble when I didn't think I would have to worry about lining up the threads.  And for the goddamn life of me, I couldn't screw the fucking sprinkler head back in a second time.  I don't know what it was.  The threads at the bottom of the head seemed to be fine.  It's hard to look five inches deep into the grass, but I think the threads at the open end of the pipe are just fine.

There is only problem I could see, and it might be a big one.  There was dirt on and in the open end of the pipe.  I was able to scrape off enough so there was nothing blocking the threads so that I could screw in the sprinkler head -- I think; shit, I thought I did that the first fucking time, but apparently not.  The issue is that opening should be completely clean.  No dirt at all should be on or in it, because if there is, it would block the flow of water coming up through the pipe and into the sprinkler head.  I don't have a way of completely cleaning that opening, so now I have to wait until I have time (probably tomorrow/Tuesday evening, assuming it isn't raining) to turn on the cycle and see if water is flowing freely through that sprinkler head.  If it isn't ... shit, man, I could see enough pressure building that the goddamn head flies up in the air, or hits one of the cars, or dents the house, or conks some neighbor who's just walking.  If it's that bad, that sprinkler head is unusable, and since I can't turn off a sprinkler head, that whole cycle has to be shut down until, I don't know, I get the company to do what it does in order to blow out all the dirt that's in that pipe.

Motherfucking Christ, why in the fuck do we have this goddamn sprinkler system, huh?  In particular, I hate that My Fucking Father has saddled me with the responsibility of maintaining it.  It wasn't my goddamn idea to install a whole fucking system which, by the way, I have only used to only water the lawn only, like, four times so far (I've turned it on way more times to fix the arcs one some of the heads, a practice I'll continue to do until they're all correct).  He got off on something that made him feel like a tried and true homeowner, but the silly and stupid details like fixing this shit?  No, I deal with that because that bullshit is beneath him.

Let's go beyond that: Why do we have lawns?  Why do we need to constantly need to tend to grass?  What is giving a lawn a crew cut proving?  I think we do it just to keep up appearances, and as you all know, I don't give a good goddamn about keeping up appearances.  Fuckin' A, man, you should see how brown my lawns are.  And I don't care, and I don't have my parents here to make me care.

But now I have to fucking find some time to check out this sprinkler head and hope it's screwed on tight enough that it won't go flying from all the water pressure and smash one of my car windows or kill a stranger.  Oh yeah, then I have to hope that it still has the arc that I want.  This is just a frustrating pain-in-the-ass, man.  I just wanted to take the key out of it, that's all. ...

Sunday, August 23, 2026

I Definitely Have Brain Rot

Woke up this morning to the sound of my sprinklers going.  Now, lately I've (or my body has) gotten into a pattern of going to sleep and waking early (at least when compared to when I usually go to bed).  But this/Sunday morning, man, I think I would've been able to sleep in ... if not for the damn sprinklers being my alarm clock.  I don't need an alarm clock this morning, especially since I did need one yesterday/Saturday because I was working.

The sprinklers were on because I turned on the sprinkler system yesterday/Saturday because I wanted them to water the lawns while I was off to work and not in the house.  I just forgot to shut the system off last night so it wouldn't wake me up.  And I forgot because I have brain rot.  I got home late from dinner after work last/Saturday night, and sure, I went off for some late night Taco Bell, too.  Oh, yeah, there was a lot of soccer I was watching, too.  (Hey, the Loons won -- whadathunkit!)  But I spent the vast majority of my evening doomscrolling.  Goddammit, man, my mind has atrophied not due to old age but because I'm on my fucking phone all the time, filling my brain up with short dopamine hits of what gets me off.  I think that if I wasn't so addicted to my phone, I would be way more attentive at doing things, like chores, or just remembering stuff, like turning off the water sprinkler system.  Shit, I have a bunch of things I should do now, and yet my cellphone is just waiting for me like a dealer in the alley.  And of course I'm going back to him -- definitely some time today, and possibly right after I blog post this.

I have a lot of stuff to do -- going through my stuff, the laundry, etc.  And I do want to fix the sprinklers; after I did a couple heads in one section of the front lawn last weekend (at least I think they're fixed), I want to try to fix the other heads in the front lawn.  But I wanted to do it on my own time ... well, my body's time, but my body was forced to wake up to the sound of the sprinklers out front, and I think because of that, I will be tired later on this evening when I want to go out.  May be overdramatizing, but maybe not.

Need to stop looking at screens and start looking at real life.

Saturday, August 22, 2026

Feeling Faint Late At Night Again

I feel it right now -- I have that kind of tiredness where I feel my head is really heavy, and that I am barely hanging onto consciousness.  It's the type of fatigue where I can instantly pass out at any time.  If I'm holding something, I could pass out and drop it.  If I'm standing up, I could pass out and fall right where I stand.  It's that kind of tired.

Have any of you felt tired like that?  I felt that some time ago, but it went away, but now I felt it last night and now.  Don't know why.  I'm scared this is a foreshadowing of sundowning and how Grandmother turned into a demented monster come dusk.  Hope this isn't an omen.

Still need to power through, though.  Have some things I still should do.

Friday, August 21, 2026

Filing For The First Time In A Long Time

Today/Friday and tomorrow/Saturday I am filing at work in place of someone vacationing.  I am nervous as all get-out because, even though I was trained on this years ago, it's been at least a year since I've filed.  I don't quite remember how to do things, so no, it's not like riding a bike.  It gets worse tomorrow/Saturday because I will be all by myself there.  If I don't know what to do, I am supposed to just leave it there for my co-worker to do it on Sunday.  Which might be what I have to do, but that sounds like I am not able to do my job.

Wish me luck.  Might have to fake it.

Thursday, August 20, 2026

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  A certain set of circumstances has converged this Week that compels me to lift all boats like this.  For the Lynx, it's going on the road and beating their two closest rivals in the standings.  Both Games were competitive, but in the end, Minnesota defeated Las Vegas by five Saturday night and Golden State by eleven last/Wednesday night.  I'm still scared that they can't keep this charmed season up; at the end of the Valkyries Match, Olivia Miles tweaked her ankle and left with about half the Fourth Quarter remaining.  Anything can derail and ruin what has been a special season.  But that fear is for the postseason.  For now, let's enjoy the Lynx having a five-Game winning streak, vanquishing both the Aces and the Valks on their home floors, and a four-Game lead over Golden State for the top Seed for the postseason.

Actually, there might be true reason to worry.  Tomorrow/Friday evening they visit Washington, and the Mystics have the size to give Minnesota problems.  They then host the Valkyries Monday night.  Did you know that Golden State still hasn't beaten the Lynx yet?

#0: Twins (Last Week: -2).  This is ridiculous, and probably a further indictment of how shitty The American League is.  The Twinks got swept by Philadelphia -- first at The Field Of Dreams Game in Dyersville, Ia., Thursday by a 7-1 score, then 9-1 at Target Field Saturday, then blowing a 5-0 lead late Sunday afternoon and losing 7-5 -- then just completed a sweep of Atlanta at home where The Bastard Boston (by way of Milwaukee) Braves never led once.  So, and I hope I'm reading the standings correctly, as of right now, The Minnesota Twins, about a Year after a brush-clearing fire sale that also destroyed most if not all of the fanbase's goodwill, would be in the playoffs.  See, this is how the Pohlads continue to sucker people into maintaining interest and buying tickets.  They willingly decimate their Bullpen and still manage to reel off a decent-enough following season that keeps local baseball fans tuned into whether they could make the postseason.  Now, to be fair, this Year they actually traded for relievers, not away.  And they're still two Games below .500.  But they should have been ass in 2026, and goddammit, they're fighting, or "fighting," for a playoff spot instead.  They deserve to be above negative numbers this Week, what can I say?

Sure, things can change.  This screening Week they're in San Diego for three starting tomorrow/Friday night, then they head to Sacramento to play The Bastard Philadelphia/Kansas City/Oakland/"Sacramento" Athletics.  They could fall off the playoff race this time next Week, but considering how weak everyone else around them is, probably not.

#-1: Gopher soccer (NEW SEASON!).  Not much is expected from this squad (if the conference preseason poll means anything), but so far, not bad.  They kicked off the Year trouncing North Dakota and Robbie Stadium Thursday, 4-0.  Then, in their only notable non-conference Match of the season, they played 19th-ranked Georgia to a 1-all Draw, also at home.  I went to that Match Sunday afternoon.  The Bulldogs scored six Seconds before Halftime on a Penalty Kick by Sage Glover, which was given after a foul by Golden Gophers Goalkeeper Sarah Martin that only was caught by the Video Assistant Referee (the NCAA has VAR now?  Cool!).  But in the 62nd Minute, Davy Mokelke deked her Defender (who may have hurt herself) and fired one past Georgia GK Jordan Brown to tie it up.  The U. was clearly the better club from that point on, but they just couldn't find the Game-winner.  Not bent out of shape too much; I thought Georgia was going to win, and they didn't.

The team's in Fargo to play North Dakota St. tonight/Thursday night.

#-2: United FC (Last Week: -3).  Look -- you can never convince me that a 2-1 score is indicative of an ass-kicking, like many Loons faithful believe after their Loss at home to Atlanta.  (MNUFC was celebrating ten Years of the organization in Major League Soccer last/Wednesday night, by the way.  Several alumni were on hand, and I was hoping some of them could put the uniform on and play.)  But the vibes around this club continue to be shit.  Anthony Markanich's equalizer was memory-holed by yet another Goal due to a Backline breakdown that gave Atlanta United the victory.  Atlanta was the foe for the Loons' very first MLS home Game, at the Gopher football squad's stadium, and they beat United FC, 6-1, so ... improvement, I guess?

I would remiss if I didn't add that MNUFC was able to tie it up at Real Salt Lake Saturday night, 1-1.  But they haven't won a league Game since defeating Columbus on the road back on May 2.  They are now out of playoff position, and they still lack quality talent at both the point and the pommel of their starting XI.  Worst of all: Fans are starting to boo the team.  I think this is a front office issue, not one dealing with talent, tactics or effort.  I really don't want to be like a typical soccer team that fires a Manager after, like, three weeks.  Still, the natives are getting restless.

Next Saturday they visit vastly-improved San Jose.

Wednesday, August 19, 2026

The Triumphant Return Of VEF!!!

OK, so I was about to do a blog post where I fell asleep at a decent time again (if you count 11:30 as a decent time) and trying to figure out when and how to fit in dropping off the wood pallet at my unit, getting a massage, going to my favorite speakeasy, and having visits from two stripper girlfriends, all before the State Fair begins.  (Still haven't figured it out yet; I might blog post about it later this week.)

But the days has already started out great, because VEF is back!  It was gone for over a month, and my God, it's like a druggie being in withdrawal.  Around the same time I saw a bunch of other porn sites put up those "I am 18+" verification boxes before you'd get to the homepage, and I thought VEF getting suddenly taken down had something to do with that.  I don't know all the details as to why and how, but that was not the case here.  All I know is I was up at around 5:30 this morning, I needed to blog post, I thought I would take another shot at VEF, and voila! it's back!!

I hadn't realized how much I've relied on VEF.  As other things remain out of place, I am so happy that I have this back in my life!!!

Tuesday, August 18, 2026

Waste The Day

I just wish I had the motivation right now to work on my stuff.  But other things get in the way.  Stuff like other chores.  For example, right after I got home (from a long day at work), I immediately (well, OK, I ate some nuts first) mowed the lawn, even though the weather has been so dry I was mowing over brown spots.  I thought I needed to mow if only because I hadn't done it in about a month.  I did that instead of, for example, going through my stuff.

I think I'm doing this because I think I have time.  I don't know if that's the case.  My parents may say they're coming home at a moment's notice.  It would be nice for me to have everything packed up and ready to go into storage, also at a moment's notice.  Shoot, at this point I would settle for immediately knowing which boxes I would put my stuff in, throw everything into those boxes, and then leave.  I would take that as a plan.  But I haven't gotten that far yet.  Instead, I'm mowing and eating and doomscrolling.

I work early tomorrow.  After work I want to get my hair cut because it's getting so long I have to wait an hour before it dries.  Maybe after I take a shower I can tackle my stuff.  Or, I'll take a nap.  I'll probably take a nap and waste yet another day that I could've used doing something productive.

Monday, August 17, 2026

I think I was able to fix the two sprinkler heads I wanted to work on this weekend so that they arc on my lawn and not our house or the neighbor's driveway.  (Unfortunately, there is still the possibility that wind could push the water from those sprinklers onto the driveway, like it did yesterday/Sunday afternoon.  I don't know if that can be helped.  What I needed to make sure was that those two sprinklers didn't arc beyond grass, and I think I accomplished that.)

But after getting a wood pallet from work home, I ... didn't do much of anything.  Sure, I've done some laundry, but that was yesterday/Sunday morning.  I still haven't really done anything with my stuff because I've been busy doing yardwork.  And I could, for example, work on my fantasy football draft, but now I'm too tired to do anything.

Damn, I feel like such a lazy failure.