Don't Fuckin' Honk At Me

I stopped by this well-regarded bar on the outskirts of downtown Minneapolis after I saw my alma mater upset Ohio St. with a few friends at our college bar in downtown Minneapolis.  I drive out of my spot but immediate waited at an intersection where I had to wait (and I knew this, I've been stopped at this light many times) for a long, long time.  And this car that drove up behind me eventually honked her horn near the end of this long, long cycle of waiting.  The fuck you do that for?  You think I was going to take a right or something?  No, you dumbass, I had to drive straight through the light so I can hang an immediate right right down the on-ramp ... and by the fucking way, you were going down there, too.  This idiot thinks I could have gone wherever she thought I was going even though there was an obvious reason I was stopped at a red light.

Man, I don't know why in the hell that honker pisses me off, but I'm running red right now.  Don't pull that bullshit on me.  Should've backed into her.

I Tried To Wash My Ballcap Last Night ...

... and it didn't go well.  It was time I tried again, so I looked it up on YouTube and online, and I followed the instructions, which told me that I needed to get a stain spray and, because I needed to make sure it would retain its shape while drying, I decided to also buy one of those ballcap holders that's supposed to hold its shape when you put it in the washing machine.  I had one of those holders once when I was in college and it didn't work; somehow, the clasps holding the top and bottom parts together pulled open, so my cap got washed alongside all the other loose pieces of clothing and it got frayed on parts of it.

Anyway, because trying to wash it using the machine didn't work all those years ago, I didn't wash them at all.  But all my hats were getting really dirty, so that's why I tried again -- and, ironically enough, I started with the ballcap that got torn up.  If I don't know what I'm doing, might as well use my first try on my most beat-up hat.  So I washed it first, then put that stain remover all over it, brushed it into all the dirty and sweaty spots (oh, I also bought a some laundry brush to do that), then soaked it in water filled with detergent and dish soap for about 20 minutes.  I then rinsed it, put it into the holder, and it's drying, slowly, in the laundry room right now.

And to be honest, I don't see a change.  I didn't see my ballcap brighten or look cleaner after I grabbed it from the bucket, the water in the bucket in which I submerged my hat didn't look dirtier, and just now, before I left for chores, it still looks as dirty as ever.  Great.  Maybe I needed to dunk it for, like, a day, or maybe that cap has seen better days.  I just thought that what I did was going to do something and, uh, it looks like it didn't.  Might as well try again, since I bought three things for this task, but seeing as how this first try didn't do anything, it's demoralizing.

Work was light enough today -- and actually the entire week -- that I was able to move up my appointment to finally get my COVID shot at my clinic's pharmacy.  Came home, replenished the new tree with about a dozen gallons of water, then I made myself a sandwich with the very last slice of turkey, ham and chicken, and now I am watching college hockey (two Games actually, but I'm concentrating on the Minnesota/Penn St. Game on Channel 9-2 because the analyst for the St. Cloud St/Arizona St. Game on Channel 23-1 is being annoying) on free TV.

This is bliss.  And I was about to post something about my parents, but I don't think I want to jinx myself by publishing my true thoughts.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -6).  This has been a really good Week overall for local sports.  None of the teams that played had .500 screening Weeks.  But who should be at the top, in my opinion, isn't much up for debate.

One shouldn't expect much from the U. male icers this season.  Like I always say, I think you have to give a Head Coach in his/her/their first Year a mulligan, even if they start off with zero Wins, one Tie and three Losses.  And you shouldn't expect much when the third-ranked team in the country comes to town for an unusual Thursday-Friday series.  But that third-ranked team in the country is North Dakota, familiar though not frequent sworn rivals, and it's possible that the juice by these two schools playing again helped the Gophers get off the schneid and actually sweep the Fighting Hawks by a pair of 5-3 scores.  Sure, it may be more impressive if they did it in Fargo (much more delicious, too).  But Brett Larson should be looking for any good signs this Year, and his players gave him two fantastic ones.  For that alone, this clubs should be on top, and in Positive Numbers as well.

And look at that ... they're starting conference play already.  They host Penn St. tomorrow/Friday and Saturday/Halloween night.

#0: Vikings (Re-Entry!).  Still not blowing teams away, but yes, it was another mostly-dominating performance by the Vikings Defense in a 16-10 victory over The Bastard Baltimore Colts.  No, I don't think the D can keep this up ... but you've got to admit that they're playing lights-out now.  And no, the Offense is still sputtering in many ways.  But Kyler Murray at least began to show more sides to his game, in particular scrambling for First Downs.  That's something Carson Wentz, for all his height, can't do.  And that running may make Murray the best runner on the team ... which is not a good thing considering Aaron Jones is hurt right now.

Which raises speculation that the Vikes are going to go for a Running Back, and in particular the one they just played who was "held" to just under 100 Yards and a Touchdown, Wisconsin product Jonathan Taylor.  The passing game is what it is, but if you can get a big (and healthy!) knocker like Taylor to augment your running game and then key off of that for play action ... look, it feels like the key to unlock what, fingers crossed, could be a Super Bowl-winning team.  Speculation is that it's all but done, the team just needs to wait until next Week for salary cap purposes.  But damn, think about it. ...

In the meantime, they have to visit Detroit.  I will accept a close defeat.  It has to happen sometime.

#-1: Gopher football (Re-Entry!).  The defeat to Purdue is a pretty big low, but goddammit, beating Iowa to get back Floyd of Rosedale is a hell of a high.  I was working the Game from press row (and for that precious man baby), and when Luke Drzewiecki kicked a 46-Yard Field Goal with no time remaining to help beat the Hawkeyes for the first time in three Years, the Golden Gopher faithful leaped over the wall to storm the field ... again.  Credit this club and P. J. Fleck; the three Turnovers they got kept the Iowa Offense under control.  These guys aren't College Football Playoff-bound, but assuming they don't lose to, like, Northwestern, they can say 2026 was a good Year for them -- even with a Saturday/Halloween afternoon date at defending national champion Indiana.  And by the way, the Hoosiers look pretty fallible; I'm not saying Minnesota's going to beat them, but Indiana can be beating, and Minnesota just so happens to be playing them on Saturday.

#-2: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -5).  Annihilated Lindenwood at Ridder, 11-0 last Thursday night and 5-2 Friday afternoon.  Better to win than to lose, but fucking Christ, what are you proving when you're pounding the shit out of Lindenwood??  A two-Game series at 12th-/13th-ranked Minnesota-Duluth tomorrow/Friday night and Saturday/Halloween afternoon will shed a little light, but only a little.

#-3: Wild (Last Week: -4).  They finish the Week 3-1, and their annual PNW/Western Canada swing 3-2.  Notably, it proved to them that they can tough out a long road trip against good competition.  Sure, they lost in Calgary, but they wound up with a 5-1 Win at Seattle, a 4-2 victory at Vancouver in Quinn Hughes's first Game back there, and then, maybe even most impressively, a grind-it-out 3-1 Win at The Bastard Winnipeg Jets/Arizona Coyotes -- a "culture win," according to the club, where they were tired and wanted the road trip to be over, and yet they dug deep to win against a vastly-improved Utah Mammoth squad because they wanted to.  Maybe these guys are a Top 5 team after all.

But then I didn't finish this WMNSS till late tonight/Thursday night, after the Islanders beat the Mild at the Gica in Overtime, and I have to drop these guys one place.  Maybe these guys are not a Top 5 team after all ... at least until (unless?) Dylan Larkin comes.

They're back out on the road this screening Week for contests vs. Washington and Philadelphia.

#-4: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -7).  In their final two home Matches of the season, the Gopher XI managed a 1-all Draw last Thursday evening with then-12th-ranked Washington from an unassisted Goal by Ellen Neuharth in the 67th Minute, followed by a 4-0 smashing of Oregon Sunday afternoon.  They wind up their regular season tomorrow/Friday night at Illinois.

The Big Ten hosts an eight-team conference tournament.  The U. is currently three Points behind Michigan, the school currently sitting in eighth.  And yet I am getting the feeling from the Golden Gopher athletics website that there is no chance Minnesota can clinch a tournament berth and so they're just playing out the string.  Moreover, I keep looking at this women's soccer bracketology website.  I can't quite decipher the charts, but it looks as though this person thinks Minnesota has a fighting chance of reaching the NCAA Tournament.  But can they even do that if they don't qualify for the B1G tourney?  Guess we'll find out soon.

#-5: United FC (Last Week: -2).  Not saying they have much of a chance.  And they really needed to play this well during the middle of the season.  But after holding the Dynamo to a scoreless Draw in Houston Saturday and coming back to defeat Sporting at Allianz Field last/Wednesday night, they are undefeated in their last five.  And they're only (?) four Points behind Real for ninth and the final playoff spot in the West.  This recent spurt of good form makes me think coaching isn't the problem, so give Cameron Knowles another (sprint) season.

Any chance to preserve their postseason chances depends on the Loons winning -- not tying, winning -- at LAFC Sunday night.  I will be watching at the soccer drag bar in town.

#-6: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -1).  Lost in five Sets at 12th-ranked Purdue (there are a lot of opponents ranked 12th that I've blog posted about this Week, huh?) Friday, then swept then-21st-ranked Washington at Maturi Pavilion Sunday afternoon.  I don't know what else is there to say about it.

They hosted the Pacific Northwest schools; now they need to travel to Los Angeles this weekend, namely tomorrow/Friday night and Sunday afternoon.

#-7: Timberwolves (Last Week: -3).  Man, this team was firing on all cylinders.  This screening Week began with rip-throughs of Orlando and Toronto.  The backcourt of Anthony Edwards and Lamelo Ball were in total sync, passing the ball like a neutrino in the Large Hadron Collider and scoring at will.  But then Edwards felt knee pain as the Wolves finally lost (in Overtime) at Cleveland, and without him they got pipped at Target Center by The Bastard Philadelphia Warriors.

But then comes to the real bad news: Ant had arthroscopic knee surgery today/Thursday and is out at least two months ... and unfortunately, some people think it should be closer to three.  How is this team going to stay afloat without their talisman, and how long will they have to survive?  It sucks that one of the superstars of the NBA will be out till possibly the New Year, and there's no certainty the T-Wolves won't be fighting for their playoff lives until they come back.  Just sucks all around.

This Week: At San Antonio, home to Milwaukee, at Houston.

Expenses Without Receipt

Starting from Tuesday, October 27:

• And from here we go back to Thursday, October 22.  Miller Amusements, who may or may not be a vendor at The Minnesota State Fair, announced they were planting their trailers at the local grocery store to sell Fair food for one final weekend.  Given how close they are to me and that they're closing down until (I'm guessing) the summer, I figured I would commemorate by eating there.  They had three trailers, and I think most of the items they sold overlapped each other.  So, given my OCD, I bought a footlong hot dog and one trailer, went several yards away and bought ranch cheese curds at a second trailer, and walked several yards back to get a large lemonade.  I tipped a buck at each trailer, so the grand total of my after-work early dinner was: $29.
• On Wednesday the 21st MC Lyte was performing at the Dakota.  This falls under the "Would I go to see an artist for that one song I know from her/him/them that I like/know?" conundrum I blog posted about when I saw Digable Planets.  And because the price point was reasonable enough, the answer was yes ... and I'm glad I did, because even though MC Lyte spoke a lot, she is a master storyteller -- and by that I mean literal storytelling, as she looked back on her life and engaged us with stories about growing up in New York and how she's about to get inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame.  She would be a great visiting professor.  So I once again paid cash for the ticket ($61.61 in actuality, but the box office person didn't need the penny), then paid cash for the alcoholic "cappuccino," the Wild Acres duck rice plate, and lemon ice box cake.  With tip I spent a total of: $141.60.
• To Tuesday the 20th where, somewhat at the behest of ******a, I went down to see her at My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Edition).  I was glad to keep her company on a typically slow Tuesday at the strip joint.  They were short-staffed, however, so no server came over to get me a drink.  ******a let me take her bottle of water; Buddha bless her.  Cover, tips for the strippers (and ******a) on stage and 20 table dances for ******a equals: $224.
• I later went to my football game-watching hangout downtown to let the manager, who works Tuesdays, know how things are going that and the following Saturday.  I ate dinner there.  With tip: $33.
• Monday, October 19 -- for the previous few days I wondered what I would eat as I watched Monday Night Football.  This night was the night I decided to try Chipotle's chili lime chips, which are good, but leave a residue of dust on my fingers.  I had it with guacamole (and, I should say, I paired that up with Taco Bell I got at the drive-thru after I parked to buy my Chipotle because I was about to lose my free chalupa if I didn't use it in time).  With tip: $6.60.
• Tuesday, October 13: ******e came over.  Thought she moved to Vegas.  Didn't.  Glad she didn't.  For the HJ: $120.
• Afterwards I went to this local Mexican place.  It was going to be a different Mexican place close by me, but the road to get there was closed that night for some reason, so I went to this other local Mexican place.  I like it because the heap the proteins there, but they always put on an extra "salsa bar" charge even though I rarely use it.  I was perturbed that night over it, so I thought I might as well pour some salsa over my tacos if I'm paying for it (even though I think Mexicans as a rule don't put salsa on their tacos; it's an American thing).  I'm also peeved that these guys round up to the nearest nickel.  With tip: $15.34.
• To Saturday, October 10, where I went to get my car washed for the first time in a while.  Charged the wash, so this EWR is tip only: $5.
• I then went to my game-watching hangout with fellow alumni.  With tip: $39.
• Friday the 9th -- I had the day off to see the guy shutting down our sprinkler system.  I went to The Minneapolis Institute Of Art mainly to see the crop art pieces, most of which were at The Minnesota State Fair.  No lines that were 2 1/2 hours long, thank God.  On my way out of MIA I made a donation of: $10.
• When I went to MIA I parked close to Glam Doll Donuts.  I bought one donut and a bottle of apple juice before I went to the museum, and on my way home, I decided, for the first time ever, to buy a half-dozen of them.  I used to go to this place so often when it was open late on weekends, but now that they close by the evening (and I have a full-time job), I only go there at most twice a year, so I bought a lot of donuts to make up for it.  The cashier threw in an extra donut, which gave me even more of a reason to sit down and eat one of them before I left.  Oh, and one of the bakers from when I was there late at night was there working.  We recognized each other and said hi.  Haven't seen that dude in years.  Plus tip: $19.
• On Wednesday the 7th ******a came by.  Yes, I was a naughty boy: $150.
• And on Monday the 5th *****y came by.  We don't do the naughty boy stuff; she just wanks me, and wanks me good: $150.
• To Saturday, October 3, where I went to the gas station and picked up Powerball tickets for Father.  He has me buying lottery tickets even though the jackpot was (and, as I write this, still is) below a billion dollars.  Don't know why he's having me do this.  Cost: $10.
• I was working the Gophers football Game, so I got to our game-watching spot in downtown Minneapolis a bit late.  The server seemed busy and indifferent, so I finally waddled up to the bar to get a Pepsi and Angry Orchard.  She finally got around to our table, so I was able to order a steak salad.  All that with tip came out to: $40.
• Thursday the 1st ... I was able to finally get ******e to come over.  She was great.  She used the bottle of coconut oil ******a left for me years back when she massaged me, but ******e used it to concentrate on my pee-pee until I lost all control.  The problem with this is she charges way more than I'm comfortable giving her.  This was a probationary HJ, and frankly, that's as far as I'm willing to go, even though she worked me over like a pro.  Paid her: $150.
• Afterwards I went to Applebee's because I wanted to try that cut-in-half burger that's plunged into a skillet filled with queso.  Obviously the cheese turns solid once it cools down even a tad, but I'm glad I ate its gooeyness.  I was able to eat and drink at a bar that was showing the Thursday Night Football Game and MLB and WNBA Playoff Games.  If I had ever been to this Applebee's, it was maybe a decade ago.  With tip: $34.
• Going back to Tuesday, September 29, where I was going to see a movie at the Trylon and I had time for a beer, so I walked to Arbiter Brewing for a pair of four-ounce glasses.  Good place in a lively area of South Minneapolis.  With tip it came out just to: $10.
• I went to the Trylon several times over the previous weeks because they had a themed festival for which they offered this program whereby if you saw enough movies in this festival and got this punch card they gave out punched enough times, you would get free popcorn, a free ticket or, if you ran the table and saw all of them, a free multi-ticket discount card.  This was the final night of this festival, and by going on this night I was able to get a fourth punch and thus get my popcorn free.  The movie was Je Tu Il Elle, by slow cinema pioneer Chantal Akerman.  It was less than 90 minutes long but, because it was slow cinema, it felt twice that.  I had to pee when it came to the scene where the truck driver guy, who picked up the hitchhiking main character (played by Akerman, who subsequently gave him an HJ), confessed that he was turned on by his daughter.  I know French-language auteur cinema frequently is risque, but I kind of checked out at that icky scene.  I thought that when I went to the bathroom to give myself a mental cleanse, I was only half an hour through the movie.  Turns out there were only 15 minutes left, so maybe that example of cinema wasn't that slow.  Anyway, I paid for the ticket and a bottle of Mexican Coke, so with the free popcorn that all came out to: $11.
• Saturday, September 26 -- went to Nelson's Cheese for a KC Beef sandwich and a large clam chowder.  With tip: $15.
• Went to my college football Game-watching hangout downtown.  With tip: $41.
• Thursday, September 24: ****e finally stopped by.  Wanted to get down with her for a long time, but she was the one who continually insisted we do something with another stripper girlfriend.  This time she came alone, and she was quite calm, compared to the times she leaped onto me and went after my genitals with the quickness.  I think I paid her more than I wanted to because I didn't have a $10.  Hope she doesn't use that as a floor through which I can never go down; otherwise she's getting too expensive, too: $160.
• Finally, on Wednesday the 23rd I finally got to Mara, the well-regarded restaurant at The Four Seasons in downtown Minneapolis.  While I had planned to go there at some point this year, I didn't think I would go there on this night.  I planned to see David Straithairn in Waiting For Godot at The Guthrie Theatre, and I walked there thinking I would be in time for a 7:30 show.  Much to my surprise and chagrin, the performance started at 7.  I did not want to attend a play a half-hour late, so I decided to go another time (I went the following week; great show!) and instead, on my way back to my car, this was the perfect time to try Mara.  Maybe I ordered too much food, but I was only mildly impressed with the bar selections I got.  The potato croquettes, the first meal I ate, probably was the best.  With a Mara Bloom cocktail, walleye sliders, a pistachio opera (it's a dessert) and tip, I spent: $100.

I continue to vow I will do these more frequently so these won't be so long.

Good through October 27.

Oh, He's A Character!

I knew when he started motoring his mouth a mile a minute and said, "No, I won't yell at you" that he would ... well, he didn't yell at me until the end, but calling the people I dealt with Saturday fools and wanting to choke out the referees kind of made him out to be a liar.

This is the type of guy I see a lot in this business: A person who has these grandiose ideas about how the production should go, and while he wants you to help, he really wants you to contribute to his vision.  If you do something you like, he'll go, "Hey, that's brilliant!!!"  And then you go ... silent, and you think you're disappointing him.  He's like a child.  Or, maybe he's autistic, so invested in his passion that he'll completely ignore you if you don't measure up.  I think I see that in him.  I mean, he wrote a lot for a job that lasted only 3 1/2 hours.

For all I know he'll make sure I never work with him again, or work there again, period.  I'm too old to deal with enfantes terribles like him.  Need to memory hole him ... until he comes around again, sheesh.

By the way -- when I saw him leave, he had a huge stay on his shirt where his belly button is.  How in the hell do you do that?

Hand's Gettin' Worse

My carpal/ulnar tunnel syndrome might be worsening.  It's not ever-present, but a few times over the weekend or so I have felt a very uncomfortable tightening or twinge whenever I hold or push or grab a certain way with my right hand.  And not too long ago I felt it going numb.

I'm seeing my doctor soon.  I should bring it up with him.

Glad I Didn't See That Shit In Person!

So my alma mater's football team lost last/Saturday night.  Got their asses kicked, actually.  They've been underachieving for, well, Decades now, but on paper at least this team should've won.  They didn't, not even close.  It boiled down to three things: Offense, Defense, and Special Teams.

Most of my fellow alumni who live here and who attend the Game-watching events I organize went to Wisconsin to watch in-person.  I declined when I had to make the decision, which, for logistical purposes (when do I buy a ticket?  How do I get there?  Where would I sleep?), was just before Labor Day, and I did so for a myriad of reasons.  I didn't want to think about buying a ticket and getting a rental car and finding a place to stay, especially in this economy and considering the fascistic practices of this government settling in places like, oh, airports.  Also, and this is a bit of a cop-out, I wanted to host the Game-watching event here.  (Turns out that didn't happen because I accepted work last/Saturday night; if I knew, say, in the late summer I would have the opportunity to work last/Saturday night, I would've jumped at the chance to say yes to the gig and no to the trip.)

But my team losing made me realize a deep-seated fear, and probably the real reason I didn't want to go: I ... well, didn't want to see my team lose in-person.  That fucking blows.  And consider everything else that would go into the losing.  You plan everything, buy the ticket, arrange lodging, get a rental or tune up your car, tell all your fellow alumni in Minnesota you're going across the border and/or meet alumni at events in Wisconsin, and then you get there and your team shits the bed.  Sure, there are other things to do there, namely parties that would/should be fun.  But speaking for myself, I wouldn't remember any of that because the point of going is going to the Game and seeing my team win, and if that doesn't happen, I would think all of this would be a tremendous waste of time and money.

I harken back to last Year when my team was in town and lost to Minnesota (the Loss was of the collapse variety, not the blowout variety -- damn, my team loses every which way).  I was only out the (pricey) cost of the ticket, and sure, the pre-Game party was fun, but my team lost, and that sucks royally.  Now, as a counterpoint (sort of, maybe), I went to Las Vegas a couple Years ago to see them play LSU ... and they won!  I took a risk, and I think that if they would have lost, I would be metaphorically hitting myself in the head for holding out hope that they would win.  But there are extenuating circumstances to that trip.  I didn't have to pay for housing; I just went to my parents' condo to stay (and to go through their mail).  They also taught me that I could go anywhere in Vegas via public transportation for $20.  Finally -- and I think I spoke about this here on WAF before -- I defrayed most of the cost of the expensive ticket to that Game because I had a credit through SeatGeek from, if I recall correctly, a ticket to the Frozen Four being held in St. Paul that fell through.  Unfortunately, I was told that I could only use it in one fell swoop, so if I didn't use it all for one ticket, I would lose the rest of the credit.  That is garbage, but it gave me the idea that I could use all that money for a ticket to see my alma mater's football team.  I think I hate wasting money more than seeing my team lose in-person.

So, under those principles, I decided I didn't want to go to Wisconsin.  Don't tell my friends who did go, but ... I made the right decision!

I Might Not Be Good At This Job Today/Saturday

So for the Game I'm doing today/Saturday, I am in this new spot that's a little more important than my usual position.  They're relying on me to relay information that they need to know -- like, really need to know, and in real time.  I did that earlier this season with, I'm sure, mixed results.  Moreover, I don't remember the last time I've been at this position for this company, if ever.

One thing I vowed from the last time was I needed binoculars.  I just bought them this week.  I hope this makes me more confident in getting the information on my own so I can relay that quicker and, hopefully, more accurately.  But I should be under no illusion that I just might suck at this job and this could be the last time I'm in this gig.  Hopefully it won't be that bad, or bad at all, but hopefully I won't think I can do this job just because I bought binoculars.  We'll see (shrug)

Oh -- Another Busy Weekend

I am working this weekend, both today/Saturday and tomorrow/Sunday.  Gopher football today/Saturday, Vikings tomorrow/Sunday.  If I really think about it, I'll be tired and intimidated.  So I don't.

This is not the first time.  In fact, it's not the first time this season.  It's the third time I'm doing a Golden Gopher-Viking weekend, actually, which makes me wonder why and how both football teams have home games scheduled on the same weekend at least three times this season.  I mean, isn't there any communication between the NFL and the Big Ten to not do that?

I've noticed another thing.  For the first two weekends, the same network was broadcasting both games.  I did not get the feeling that the crew for each game was ever in contact with the other.  On the one hand it makes sense since they're such a big network.  On the other hand they are in the same department, so they have had to at least bumped into each other at their home base.  Wouldn't they be at least curious enough of the co-workers who happen to be working in the same metro area to talk, or maybe even to hang out?  By the way, it was one network doing both games on the first weekend and a different network doing both games on the second weekend, but on this weekend, they're split -- I'm doing one game for each network.  I hope I don't wear the other company's clothing when I work.