The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: United FC (Last Week: -3).  My God.  I don't think I've ever had a WMNSS where most of the teams had a .500 screening Week.  Here, four of the five do.  I wallow in a field of over-abundant mediocrity, so I don't know who to put first.  In fact, if I do this survey in the morning, I'll probably have a different order.

But for now, I'm giving it to the Loons.  My excuse: They're the only club that didn't lose this past Week.  Yeah, that's it.  Now, I was at Allianz Field Saturday night for their 3-all Draw vs. Orlando City, and that was weird shit.  The Lions got up 1-0 in the First Half, and knowing how mid they've been all Year, I started concentrating on my cellphone.  Then, in the Second Half, OCSC scored a second and then I really got into my phone.  Then, by God, MNUFC scored not once, not twice, but thrice in the span of four Minutes to take the lead, and I swear, I don't think I've seen a comeback like that from any Minnesota team, let alone United FC, in Decades.  But then in Second Half Stoppage Time, the Loons' leaky-as-shit Defense allowed the Match-tying Goal, and they give away two Points.

There was a home Game vs. Portland several seasons ago that is the closest to what happened here.  The Loons led 3-0, then allowed the Timbers to score four Goals, and then they tied it up led to steal a Point.  Here, their Tie puts them in ninth place and the last playoff spot in the West, glory be.  That doesn't mean they're a good team.  Not at all.

Saturday they travel to Portland.  Wednesday they host Dallas.  I don't know if I want to go that Match.  For one thing, the NFL season begins that evening.  Also, Jungle is playing at The Armory, and I really, really want to see them.  MNUFC, give me a reason to see you instead of football or Jungle.

#-2: Gopher volleyball (NEW SEASON!!).  They started off busy, tell you what.  I don't remember if they've ever played four Games in a Week.  But they did and they went, you guessed it, 2-2.  Three of their opponents were ranked and, unfortunately, they only won one of those, so when considering the quality of their foes, the volleyballers land in the middle of the survey.

The results are so mixed that I'm not prepared to slot them as a great team, a good one, or an underachieving one.  In the season-opening State Farm College Volleyball Showcase in Sioux Falls, S. D., they got swept by then-#12 Arizona St. on Friday, then swept then-#13 Creighton on Saturday.  (By the way, this tournament was weird.  There were five teams in it, and only five Matches were played.  Purdue appeared in the first Match on Friday and then was done.  The Bluejays, meanwhile, played thrice while Minnesota and the other three schools played twice.  Huh?)  In the Big Ten/SEC Challenge, being hosted in Madison, Wisc., they lost to 17th-ranked Florida in four Sets Tuesday, though they came back to defeat unranked Auburn in four last/Wednesday night.

They host The Diet Coke Classic, far from its flush days when there were three other clubs and they all played each other at the Sports Pavilion over three Days.  There are only two other colleges now.  Tomorrow/Friday night they host Miami; Sunday afternoon they host the exotic school St. Thomas.

#-3: Twins (Last Week: -4).  They finish 3-3 this Week, they're six Games below .500, and somehow it's not outlandish to say that they're still in the playoff hunt -- only 3 1/2 Games behind Cleveland for ALWC3!  But the Bullpen still can't be relied on, the Offense won't hit if Zebby Matthews isn't pitching (Matthews had a spectacular August), and we don't know when or even if Byron Buxton is going to be back in the Lineup.  The organization is relying on its youngsters now, but it still seems as if the organization is spinning its wheels.  What are supposed to feel about this club?

Last Week they hosted the White Sox and Detroit.  This Week they travel to the White Sox and Detroit.

#-4: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -2).  In their second and final marquee non-con Match, they bitterly lost 1-0 at then-#15 BYU last Thursday evening, 1-0, in the 78th Minute on an, ah!, Own Goal.  They came home to defeat St. Thomas at Robbie Stadium Sunday evening, 2-1, but damn, that stupid Loss to the Cougars is costly.

Their second of three straight Matches at home continues Sunday afternoon versus Colorado College.

#-5: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  The only squad not to go .500 this screening Week is the one you'd least expect -- the Lynx, the only glimmer of hope in these parts of bringing home a championship.  On Saturday they lost for the second straight Game, 89-81 in Atlanta.  Just before that they lost at home to Golden State, and I rationalized that by saying that Cheryl Reeve wanted to experiment with her lineup.  I don't know if that's the case this time around.  No, they may have just gotten beat.  And that is scary for the fanbase's belief that a title is in the bag.

Many people believe the Valkyries, who sit second in the standings behind Minnesota, are now the odds-on favorite.  That's because they have the #1 Defense in the WNBA, and have had the top spot pretty much all season.  The Lynx are fourth in Defensive Net Rating, and have slipped on D since the All-Star Break.  And hate to say it, but Napheesa Collier hasn't had the impact upon returning like I thought she would, or should.  And now she (along with three or four other Lynx players) are in Germany for the FIBA Women's Basketball World Cup.  I don't know if I want Phee playing in a tournament, even for country.  Meanwhile, A'ja Wilson left Team USA, ostensibly to rest for the WNBA stretch run.  That's a smart idea; why isn't Collier doing that?  And that's not even thinking about what would the squad do if Collier got hurt bad.  Then what?

Bad vibes around this team.  All around.

Expenses Without Receipt

Starting from Friday, August 28:

• We go back to Thursday, August 27, the first day of the State Fair.  Didn't have as much money as I wanted, so I relied on my credit card for the Blue Barn Sweet Squeakers (which is fast becoming an annual staple), the Frozen Blue beer, Swedish coffee, and Cherry Jumbo Limeade Float from, uh, that place (I should commit the shop's name to memory; I can see getting this year after year, too).  But I shelled out cash for the Gizmo (first time ever I've eaten at this place), the corn, and the Peachey's Amish donut.  With a tip for the Gizmo the total is: $26.
• On Tuesday the 25th I went to Caribou before work partly so I could get cash.  A medium mocha (just a mocha, not one of their signature mochas), minus trivia and plus, gets to: $7.25.
• That evening I had to go to our alumni Game-watching place to make sure it was OK for us to watch our Game, which is that Saturday, there.  We could.  With tip I spent: $37.
• All the way back to Saturday, August 15, where I went to Porchfest at the Wedge neighborhood.  Wish I could have spent some more time down there, walking through the streets and catching bands playing.  I tipped the bands, and I also got a cup of lemonade from a family selling it.  Total amount I spent for Porchfest: $5.
• Monday, August 3: ******a, oh, ******a: $150.
• We hurtle back to Tuesday, July 28, where I had to see Supergirl a second time because I missed the very start of it the first time.  Ticket, popcorn, pop, minus my $5 discount because I used points (I got food with a movie for the first time in a long time, and knowing how much it regularly costs, I won't be buying food again for a while) comes out to: $17.30.
• Sunday, July 26 ... this is the day I wanted to drive to Iowa, but I had to wait for ****e* to get here, and I finally just left because her lazy but nice ass couldn't get out of her house when she promised she would.  Not mad, just disappointed.  I got to The Day The Music Died Memorial, which is out on a private cornfield, in the early evening.  Wish I had went when it wasn't blisteringly humid, but you can't predict the weather.  Still, it was eerie and moving, and I'm glad I got to pay my respects.  And I got to pay it alone; I got to the parking lot, which is across the gravel street from the memorial site, as another person was leaving, and no one came after me.  There was an RV of someone who was tending to the gravel parking lot I parked at.  I got the feeling she and her family appointed themselves as caretakers of the memorial and the parking lot.  They had little trinkets to sell, and they asked for donations.  I appreciated that someone is dedicating themselves to keeping up the area, so I donated: $5.
• On Saturday the 25th I went out to Stillwater and got Nelson's Ice Cream.  This place is famous for heaping scoop upon scoop upon scoop of ice cream.  Their smalls are large.  I appreciate that in these days of paying more and getting less, but this was ridiculous.  With tip: $8.
• I wanted to get ice cream after I saw *****y, but her hot but finicky ass made me cum see her after ice cream.  And then she made me cum: $150.
• Thursday, July 23: I don't know if the date is right.  But I have this as the day I went to Nelson's -- not the ice cream shop in Stillwater but the deli place close to home.  Got a Hero, a medium chicken wild rice soup, and a can of RC Cola.  With tip the total was: $17.32.
• Wednesday the 22nd -- had to buy lottery tickets, both lotteries.  Total: $14.
• I then got gasoline.  Paid cash for it: $32.
• To Sunday the 19th, where I went to Grandpa Joe's for a Whistler pop.  Minus the bottle deposit I paid: $1.62.
• I then went to the Black Hart to watch some World Cup soccer.  Can of cider plus tip: $7.
• That night I went to a local theater to watch The Odyssey.  This is an historic one-screen place (although it's owned by a company that has a few historic one-screen places) that showed the film in 70mm.  This is a theater where the person running the screening is an aficionado, and he showed how better the resolution a flick is in 70mm by bringing out the reel in which the film is threaded.  I like the presentation.  I love the movie, too; it's fantastic, and the probable Oscar favorite for Best Film.  Small popcorn, small pop, and tips for concessions and the organist (I used my credit card for the ticket): $14.
• Finally, on Wednesday, July 15, I took that day and the following day off for World Cup Semifinals -- and, on this day, to take my car in for maintenance.  After the oil change and tire rotation, I took my vehicle to the car wash.  Paid for the wash, but the tip was in cash: $5.
• Because there was nothing seriously wrong with the car, I had time to go to Flameburger to take in breakfast.  Great to eat there; will return next year.  Got their meal of half an egg, hash browns and toast, and with a small apple juice and tip it cost me: $15.
• Later that afternoon I went to Brit's Pub to see Spain handcuff France, 2-0.  There went my World Cup pick.  With tip: $54.

I keep saying this because it remains true: I have to do these EWRs more often.

Good through August 28.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: Positive Numbers).  I'm not all that bent out of shape in their home Loss to Golden State by 14 Monday night.  The Valkyries hadn't beaten the Lynx up till then, an 0-9 record that isn't that much better now that it's 1-9.  (The Valks fanbase was getting kind of thirsty with every Lynx Win.  It was getting pathetically funny.)  Courtney Williams broke her Ironwoman streak and didn't play for the first time in 196 Games because of a bad ankle/foot.  Naphessa Collier came off the bench.  Olivia Miles and Natasha Howard played less than 30 Minutes.  Maya Caldwell played 25.  Shit, everybody on the roster played: The very last four players got seven Minutes!  And finally, Cheryl Reeve experimented with a lot of new five-mans.

Clearly, Reeve was conceding this Game to work on her team.  No worries; their magic number to clinch Home Court remains at 1.  I think a result more representative of what the team truly is was Friday's ten-Point victory at a Washington Mystics outfit that is big enough down low to give the Lynx fits.  They're still the best team in the WNBA.  So even though they can't get above negative numbers, overall I still think they're the best team in local sports.

The big variable comes up after Sunday afternoon's tilt at Atlanta and new acquisition Dewanna Bonner, another big and beefy club Minnesota has to watch out for.  The entire league will take an almost-three-Week break for the FIBA Women's World Cup with the Lynx having only four Games left in the regular season.

#-2: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -1).  On Thursday in Fargo, the U. came back from a 1-0 Second Half deficit in just 46 Seconds, then 7:20 later, they took the lead on a Penalty Kick that turned out to be the Game-winner.  Both Goals were scored by Ava Westlund.

Impressive.  And yes, the Gopher soccer squad went "undefeated" this Week.  Plus, technically, they're still unbeaten this season.  I still don't believe that they're a good team, though, and until I see more Wins or even Draws in Games I expected them to tie or lose, I'll keep them as the middling club I have pre-conceived them to be.  And that's why I have them below the Lynx.  But there is an opportunity for Minnesota to make some more noise because tonight/Thursday night they visit 15th-ranked BYU.  (I take back what I said in last Week's WMNSS, when I derisively said the Gophs' Tie with Georgia is the only notable non-conference Match they'll play this Year.  But, swear to Buddha, I didn't see the Cougars on the schedule until now.)  They then come home to host St. Thomas Sunday afternoon.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -2).  OK, where in the fuck did Saturday night's 5-1 rout at San Jose come from??  Kelvin Yeboah got a brace.  Joaquin Pereya tied the Match at 1 with ... what's called a rabona?  I've seen several replays and still don't understand what the hell happened.  Anyway, newly-installed starter Marcus Caldeira scored.  So did Mauricio Gonzalez to cap the scoring.  And the Loons won in Major League Soccer play for the first time since May 2, a stretch of nine winless.  It seems obvious these guys play a shit ton better on the road.

Based on tie-breakers, MNUFC are still out of the playoff picture, but Points-wise, they're in a four-way tie for seventh, so all is not lost.  But Saturday night they play Antoine Griezmann and Orlando City, another team clinging onto postseason hopes.  And United FC is playing at home, which may be a troubling omen.

#-4: Twins (Last Week: 0).  This may be the screening Week that puts them out of the playoff race for good.  Not when they got swept in San Diego, then lost two-of-three in Sacramento ... excuse me, West Sacramento to the cromulent (cityless) Athletics.  Believe it or not they're still in this; the Twinks are four Games behind ALWC3, which is not-so-great Cleveland.  But there are four squads ahead of them, so the chances are high one of those teams is going to catch fire and capture the last postseason berth.  Can they turn it around in a Week-long homestand against two divisional foes, the AL Central-leading White Sox and fellow playoff hopeful Detroit?

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  A certain set of circumstances has converged this Week that compels me to lift all boats like this.  For the Lynx, it's going on the road and beating their two closest rivals in the standings.  Both Games were competitive, but in the end, Minnesota defeated Las Vegas by five Saturday night and Golden State by eleven last/Wednesday night.  I'm still scared that they can't keep this charmed season up; at the end of the Valkyries Match, Olivia Miles tweaked her ankle and left with about half the Fourth Quarter remaining.  Anything can derail and ruin what has been a special season.  But that fear is for the postseason.  For now, let's enjoy the Lynx having a five-Game winning streak, vanquishing both the Aces and the Valks on their home floors, and a four-Game lead over Golden State for the top Seed for the postseason.

Actually, there might be true reason to worry.  Tomorrow/Friday evening they visit Washington, and the Mystics have the size to give Minnesota problems.  They then host the Valkyries Monday night.  Did you know that Golden State still hasn't beaten the Lynx yet?

#0: Twins (Last Week: -2).  This is ridiculous, and probably a further indictment of how shitty The American League is.  The Twinks got swept by Philadelphia -- first at The Field Of Dreams Game in Dyersville, Ia., Thursday by a 7-1 score, then 9-1 at Target Field Saturday, then blowing a 5-0 lead late Sunday afternoon and losing 7-5 -- then just completed a sweep of Atlanta at home where The Bastard Boston (by way of Milwaukee) Braves never led once.  So, and I hope I'm reading the standings correctly, as of right now, The Minnesota Twins, about a Year after a brush-clearing fire sale that also destroyed most if not all of the fanbase's goodwill, would be in the playoffs.  See, this is how the Pohlads continue to sucker people into maintaining interest and buying tickets.  They willingly decimate their Bullpen and still manage to reel off a decent-enough following season that keeps local baseball fans tuned into whether they could make the postseason.  Now, to be fair, this Year they actually traded for relievers, not away.  And they're still two Games below .500.  But they should have been ass in 2026, and goddammit, they're fighting, or "fighting," for a playoff spot instead.  They deserve to be above negative numbers this Week, what can I say?

Sure, things can change.  This screening Week they're in San Diego for three starting tomorrow/Friday night, then they head to Sacramento to play The Bastard Philadelphia/Kansas City/Oakland/"Sacramento" Athletics.  They could fall off the playoff race this time next Week, but considering how weak everyone else around them is, probably not.

#-1: Gopher soccer (NEW SEASON!).  Not much is expected from this squad (if the conference preseason poll means anything), but so far, not bad.  They kicked off the Year trouncing North Dakota and Robbie Stadium Thursday, 4-0.  Then, in their only notable non-conference Match of the season, they played 19th-ranked Georgia to a 1-all Draw, also at home.  I went to that Match Sunday afternoon.  The Bulldogs scored six Seconds before Halftime on a Penalty Kick by Sage Glover, which was given after a foul by Golden Gophers Goalkeeper Sarah Martin that only was caught by the Video Assistant Referee (the NCAA has VAR now?  Cool!).  But in the 62nd Minute, Davy Mokelke deked her Defender (who may have hurt herself) and fired one past Georgia GK Jordan Brown to tie it up.  The U. was clearly the better club from that point on, but they just couldn't find the Game-winner.  Not bent out of shape too much; I thought Georgia was going to win, and they didn't.

The team's in Fargo to play North Dakota St. tonight/Thursday night.

#-2: United FC (Last Week: -3).  Look -- you can never convince me that a 2-1 score is indicative of an ass-kicking, like many Loons faithful believe after their Loss at home to Atlanta.  (MNUFC was celebrating ten Years of the organization in Major League Soccer last/Wednesday night, by the way.  Several alumni were on hand, and I was hoping some of them could put the uniform on and play.)  But the vibes around this club continue to be shit.  Anthony Markanich's equalizer was memory-holed by yet another Goal due to a Backline breakdown that gave Atlanta United the victory.  Atlanta was the foe for the Loons' very first MLS home Game, at the Gopher football squad's stadium, and they beat United FC, 6-1, so ... improvement, I guess?

I would remiss if I didn't add that MNUFC was able to tie it up at Real Salt Lake Saturday night, 1-1.  But they haven't won a league Game since defeating Columbus on the road back on May 2.  They are now out of playoff position, and they still lack quality talent at both the point and the pommel of their starting XI.  Worst of all: Fans are starting to boo the team.  I think this is a front office issue, not one dealing with talent, tactics or effort.  I really don't want to be like a typical soccer team that fires a Manager after, like, three weeks.  Still, the natives are getting restless.

Next Saturday they visit vastly-improved San Jose.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Just want to note that typically (this changed this Year; the Loons didn't play for two Months due to the World Cup, so we've had several screening Weeks where there were only two teams I had to talk about) this marks the end of the fallow/easy season of The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey.  Gopher soccer starts their season tonight/Thursday night, and we'll just be adding teams from here on till, oh, the spring.  More work for me on this the rest of the Year.  Oh, well.

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  Started off their extremely busy Week by snapping their winning streak at ten with an inexplicable collapse in The Fourth Quarter at home Thursday to Los Angeles, losing 89-82.  Cheryl Reeve ripped her team a new asshole, and they responded Saturday afternoon finally putting away The Bastard Utah Starzz, 98-87, Saturday afternoon, then beating The Bastard Detroit Shock by 13 the next afternoon and, finally, holding off the Fire in Portland last/Wednesday night, 85-81 after leading by as much as 29 Points.  The Defense continues to crawl back from the mediocrity they fell into in the middle of the season.  Now, the big shortcoming is bench scoring; Minnesota may have the best starting 5 in all the WNBA, but scoring from substitutes is increasingly looking like a rumor.

And yet their Net Rating remains the best in the league, and of course they have the best record in the W, too.  That will be put the test as they continue a four-Game road trip this Week versus, respectively, the third- (Las Vegas on Saturday) and second-best (Golden State on Wednesday) clubs in the league.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  The Twinks traded for three Bullpen arms just before The Trade Deadline, and yet they continue to struggle to put Games away, as evidenced by back-to-back 4-3 defeats at The Bastard Seattle Pilots Saturday and Sunday.  And yet, after going through a 4-3 Week, they remain, stupidly, a 1/2-Game behind The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0. for ALWC3 -- and they still remain below .500, too.

They continue their almost-maximum homestand with a weekend three-Game set vs. The Philadelphia Phillies.  They play Saturday and Sunday at Target Field.  But they start their series tonight/Thursday night in Dyersville, Ia., as the Twins "host" The Field Of Dreams Game at 6:30.  That's got to be something.  By the way, a ticket Tuesday night was being sold for over $800.  The Bastard Boston Braves then come in for a trio beginning Monday.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  First off, I have to say that the malaise infecting the senior team was on hand Saturday evening when I went to see MNUFC2 close by.  They took the lead on The San Jose Earthquakes 2 off a Penalty Kick, but that PK was initially missed; a teammate had to swoop in to pounce on the rebound.  The Twoons allowed San Jose 2 to equalize when one of the United FC 2's players made a backpass just as the Goalkeeper ran up to his teammate; an opposing player got to the ball before the backtracking Goalkeeper did.  Finally, right after the final whistle, MNUFC2 cracked under pressure and could convert only 1-of-4 Penalty Kicks, losing 3-1 after 4 1/2 Rounds.  Not a display of professional soccer there.

After hearing they lost to Tigres on Friday and knowing I had to go to Tuesday's meaningless Leagues Cup finale against Atlante because no one wanted my ticket, I was prepared to see an even more woeful performance than I saw the previous Tuesday against Juarez.  And the attendance sucked.  The combination of two Months off due to the World Cup (which is understandable but still disappointing), the almost-immediate post-WC dive into a contrived intercontinental tournament that many people are still lukewarm over, and, of course, United FC's piss-poor play is damaging fan relations in a way I haven't seen since they bought into top-flight soccer in 2017.  And so this is the time when the Loons decide to win, their first Win of any Match that counts since April 18.  Thank Buddha for Joaquin Pereyra; without his Brace, they wouldn't have been able to pull off the spirit-lifting victory.

Back to league action; they visit Real Salt Lake Saturday night, then host Atlanta Wednesday.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  They've run their winning streak to ten in a row, matching the Lynx squad from ten Years ago in reaching that mark.  And hey, they kicked ass for once, trouncing the Tempo in Toronto Thursday by 32 Points.  They followed that up with a Sunday afternoon national TV Game vs. Caitlin Clark MAGA bitch Sophie Cunningham and The Indiana Fever, The Team With The Most Toxic Fanbase In North American Sports.  I was home and could've watched it, but didn't because I thought they were going to lose because evil wins in this world.  Thank Buddha I'm wrong, even though the Lynx (once again) blew a double-digit lead in The Fourth Quarter before righting the ship and beating the Fever, 108-100.

The chemistry between Olivia Miles and Napheesa Collier is still developing.  Also, and sorry to sound like a broken record, but the Lynx were the #1 Seed last Year and not only did they not win, they didn't even make it to The WNBA Finals.  I'm still keeping them in negative numbers until they reach better milestones ... such as The Longest Streak In Lynx History, which they could reach tonight when they host Los Angeles.  They'll finish a four-Game homestand with a weekend back-to-back versus two pretty solid outfits -- The Bastard Utah Starzz Saturday afternoon (I'll be working this one), The Bastard Detroit Shock Sunday afternoon.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  They were busy adding Bullpen arms, three of them to be exact, at the Trade Deadline.  I'm sorry, but I don't care.  I still have PTSD from the unnecessary and cruel fire sale at last season's Trade Deadline, so I'm not over it.  This organization will have to take Years and Years of asset-hoarding in order for us to forget that shit.

As for the team in the present day ... well, they went 2-4 this screening Week, winning their two Games before losing their four Games.  And despite all of that, the Twinks are only one Game behind Cleveland and The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0 for ALWC3.  That's how bad The American League is this season.  So no, I don't blame the Twinks for trying to compete.  They're just not going to win

They try and avoid the sweep at the Royals tonight/Thursday night.  They then travel to Milwaukee and face The Bastard Seattle Pilots for a trio over the weekend.  They then come home to host The Bastard St. Louis Browns for a three-Game series starting on Monday.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  I saw this on Facebook yesterday/Wednesday: The Loons have not won at home since defeating Portland 2-0 back on April 18.  Sure, there was that two-Month-long Olympic break, and they have drawn four times to two Losses.  But still, not being able to sing "Wonderwall" since around Tax Day really sucks.

I felt kind of good that MNUFC tied San Diego on Saturday, but they gave up a foul in the box that resulted in SDFC scoring from the spot.  What was really demoralizing, though, was the 2-1 defeat at Allianz Field to FC Juarez to start Leagues Cup play on Tuesday.  That's when it really dawned on me: The big problem with this XI is that they can't score worth shit.  Time after time on Tuesday they weren't able to string together the right pass in the Final Third.  And because they lost their first of only three Group Games, and because only the top four of the 18 Major League Soccer participating in this tournament advance to the Knockout Round, I think Minnesota United FC have already been eliminated.  I was able to pawn off my ticket Friday vs. Tigres (I should expound on this more, but if this were just a straight-up Friendly, I would have enthusiastically gone to watch the Match), and I'm in the process of almost giving away my ticket for Tuesday's Game against Atlante, but I can't set my asking price at SeatGeek lower than they say it can be.  Anyway, I don't think it'll be my issue anymore if I'm able to sell both tickets.

Busy Week Ahead

So tonight/Tuesday night and Friday night there are MNUFC Matches.  I have my screening at work Thursday morning, which means I will work out and then fast Wednesday evening.  Saturday I work the Lynx Game and Sunday there's that big party I need to go to.  Plus I'm still waiting for my parents to tell me when they're coming home, so I have started to at least figure out how to haul away all my stuff back to the storage unit if I need to pick things up quickly.

But this leaves no time to just relax at home, and probably little time to do chores, such as washing dishes, washing clothes, and going through the aforementioned stuff.  So glad they're not coming home this week ... as far as I know.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  Only one Game this screening Week as the WNBA came back from All-Star Weekend, and Minnesota beat visiting Toronto Tuesday, 100-93.  I have to admit I was wrong about Olivia Miles.  Not only did I underestimate how the team can basically set and forget the Point Guard position for at least the next five seasons, I didn't know she would be such a fucking showstopper.  Just take a look at this:

Olivia Miles goes between the legs on a drop pass to Kayla McBride for 3

[image or embed]

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero.bsky.social) July 28, 2026 at 7:41 PM

I'm still scared that Awa Fam will be better than her in two or three seasons, but right now, I'm buying the ticket and enjoying the ride.

Lynx have won eight in a row and still lead the W.  But look at the margins of victory: 6, 5, 4, 9, 8, 3, 10 and 7.  If you're a dominant team, you stomp the hell out of your opponents.  Is anyone bothered that the Lynx aren't doing that?  They held a 14-Point lead three Minutes into the Fourth Quarter and the Tempo still managed to cut it to three with eighty Seconds left.  And while Minnesota is currently best in Net Rating, the Lynx currently lag behind Golden State in Defensive Rating and trail Indiana and Las Vegas in Offensive Rating.  I'm a pessimist; I seek out reasons Minnesota teams fail because they invariably do.

They finish a home-and-home with Toronto by playing in Canada tonight/Thursday night.  They then host The Indiana Fever, the team with the most toxic fanbase and social media army of any North American sports team, Sunday afternoon to start a four-Game homestand.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  Went 4-2 over the past Week, and now the speculation, such as it is, is whether the Twins might be buyers this season.  We'll believe it when we see it, but, and this might be me being too slow on the uptake, The American League is pathetic this Year.  There are two runaway very good teams in the AL, Tampa and the Yankees (and neither of them are above .600).  The third-best squad is the White Sox.  The Twinks are only three Games behind them, and only a half-Game behind Houston for American League Wild Card 2.  They could not make a move and be in the thick of things, so even trading for an anonymous Bullpen arm could improve their chances disproportionately.

By the way, last/Tuesday night they were shut out by Kansas City, who are in last in The American League Central Division, at home, 4-0.  The winning Pitcher?  Randy Dobnak, former Twins Pitcher who infamously was an Uber driver before finally getting a toehold in the majors.  Happy he's back, but losing to Dobnak doesn't make the Twinks look good, no offense to him.

After finishing up with the Royals this/Thursday afternoon, they travel to Seattle to play a three-Game series vs. the Mariners this weekend, then visit Kansas City for a trio starting Tuesday.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  Technically they didn't lose Saturday night at home versus Vancouver.  But I watched that 0-0 Tie in-person, and I swear there was a big loser: The sport of soccer.  It was a dreary, listless affair.  If there were scoring chances, I scantly remember them.  They tabulate xG at the Match, and I swear the Loons finished with .07 xG while the Whitecaps finished with .06 xG, an indication of how moribund the Game was.  And now I look at ESPN and they say MNUFC led (or trailed, considering they didn't score what they were expected to score) in xG, 1.1-.44 (while meanwhile, the club's website has Vancouver with .6 xG -- man, Expected Goals is an unreliable fucking statistic, and it doesn't help if people can't agree what the goddamn number is, come on!).  The only other thing that sticks out is Referee Lorenzo Hernandez, three Yellow Cards issued notwithstanding, largely swallowed his whistle and allowed both teams to play and/or scratch and claw.

United FC remains in the ninth and final playoff spot in the West.  They host San Diego FC Saturday night before Major League Soccer, barely back from their World Cup-induced two-Month break, plunge into Leagues Cup play, hosting FC Juarez of Liga MX.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  So the big (and obvious) news is Napheesa Collier is back!  And she decided to come back yesterday/Wednesday afternoon, in Seattle, for the Storm's annual camp Game.  Kind of delicious that Queen Phee came back to crush the hopes of a bunch of girls rooting for the other team, no?  She did, scoring 24 Points and grabbing ten Rebounds in only 22 Minutes, helping the Lynx complete a 3-0 Week and extending their winning streak to seven.  And they have The Best Record In The WNBA by 2 1/2 Games over, of all squads, Golden State.  (By the way, The Western Conference has the best four records in the W -- Minnesota, Golden State, Las Vegas, and Dallas.  The Eastern Conference then has the next-best four records -- Indiana, Atlanta, New York and Washington.  And the Mystics lead ninth-place Portland by 3 1/2 Games.  The clubs in the eight playoff sports are separately.)

My only issue is that the Lynx beat the Storm only by ten.  They swept their short two-Game series in Seattle, also beating the Storm Monday, but only by three.  Yesterday/Wednesday was the only double-digit victory the Lynx have had in this current winning streak.  Sure, many people think the Lynx is dominant, but if so, why can't they blow away teams by 35, like Indiana did last/Wednesday night over The Bastard Orland Miracle?

The All-Star Break has come.  Olivia Miles, Courtney Williams and Natasha Howard are participating in The All-Star Game.  Then, on Tuesday, play resumes as Minnesota hosts Toronto.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  Not a great return from their All-Star Break.  It began Friday beating the Cubs at Wrigley, 5-2, and they defeating the Guardians in Cleveland yesterday/Wednesday, 10-6, but they lost the four Matches inbetween.  And since The Trade Deadline is coming in less than two weeks, every Loss is giving the Pohlads a great excuse to conduct yet another fire sale.  Why can't this fucking team just move to Nashville or something?

They finish up their series versus Cleveland this/Thursday afternoon.  They host the (Sacramento) Athletics for a trio this weekend.  Then, Kansas City comes to town of a three-Game set starting on Tuesday.

#-3: United FC (Re-Entry!).  Forgot that with the World Cup now over, Major League Soccer is back from their one-Day-short-of-two-Months World Cup Break.  And they resumed play by losing at Sporting Kansas City, the worst team in the Western Conference, 2-1 last/Wednesday night.  They currently sit ninth in the West, and I'm scared that the long, long break will mean they will nosedive the rest of the Year.

At home vs. Vancouver Saturday.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -2).  I understand that they ran the table this screening Week.  I know they've won four in a row.  And I see that they remain tops in the league.  I also see that in Monday's Win over Phoenix, Kayla McBride and Olivia Miles combined to score 70 Points.  But as herculean an effort that was, they still beat a team that currently sits at 6-18 only by four Points.  They toughed out a five-Point victory over New York Saturday afternoon and, in their annual camp Game, they beat Los Angeles by nine.  These are only single-digit Wins, and frankly, I would be a lot happier thinking the club's a juggernaut if they were blowing other squads away by 15-20 Points.  (Winning all those Games at home helps a lot; can't help but think that if the Lynx played on the road, they easily could have gone 0-3.)  But that hasn't happened, at least not lately, and that scares me.  Napheesa Collier can't come back fast enough, because I fear that other teams in the W are catching up with the Lynx.

They complete a four-Game homestand hosting Bridget Carlton and The Portland Fire (again) Saturday night.  They then play two Games in Seattle, Monday night and Wednesday afternoon in the Storm's annual camp Game.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -1).  A 2-2 Week.  But they have won their last five series, including, in this screening Week, Cleveland and Anaheim, both at home.  They also are, technically, tied with Seattle for the final American League Wild Card spot.  And they've done while still being a Game below .500.  It speaks to 1) how ass the AL is and 2) how easy it is to be lulled back into supporting a poverty franchise that has continually slapped the state in the face with its steadfast commitment to parsimony and its refusal to take meaningful steps (i.e., spend money) to field a championship team.  Look -- they sold the farm last Year and they can still make the playoffs this Year!  These guys know what they're doing!

They start the second half of their season on the road -- at the Cubs for three beginning tomorrow/Friday, then in Cleveland for four starting Monday.

Expenses Without Receipts

Starting from Saturday, July 11:

• Well, we're going back to Friday, July 10, the day I went to a party.  Because of that, I stopped by an ATM to get money that morning.  I was going to dump a bottle of motor oil in a trash can, as well as an old Chick-Fil-A milkshake cup I had in my refrigerator that had a little bit of milkshake left but somehow froze even though it was in the fridge, then I was planning to get a mocha from Caribou just a couple of suites away.  But standing ... there was some stringy White woman who asked me if I was going into Caribou.  She said she was kicked out of there for "trespassing."  Now that sounded weird, plus I had to go to work, so I just said I stopped my car to throw that bottle and milkshake cup away.  She then asked me if I could go into Caribou and buy coffee for her, and I refuse to help strangers that way, so I said no.  But that meant my cover was blown and I couldn't buy Caribou ... at least not from there, because thank Buddha there is another Caribou close by.  In fact, this Caribou is closer to work, but I always hated this one because of the shitty customer service.  This time around was OK, so maybe the bad baristas are gone.  Anyway, I hope the weird lady is gone now.  Mocha, pastry and tip equals: $11.75.
• The party after work that day was ... different.  Talked about *****y watching over me.  Again, I just wished I had performed better for ******e.  But at least she didn't charge me an arm and a leg over my pee-pee.  With cover it all came out to: $150.
• Monday the 6th ... this was the day where I went to the Black Hart after work to watch the Americans lose and be eliminated in the World Cup.  I thought I had used cash for everything I ate and drank there and just forgot, but turns out I only used cash for that busker who comes around selling her Mexican food.  Got an enchilada, but they didn't have any utensils to eat it with.  Come on, guys, do better.  Cost: $10.
• Back to Friday the 3rd, the start of a glorious long Independence Weekend.  I started it at the barber school so I could get a shave.  My hair was getting long.  Also, I was asked to do this video tribute to a guy who runs a men's basketball pool I've been a part of for almost two decades, so I needed to look good.  The shave was also good, even though I realized I needed to leave because I had things I needed and wanted to do.  Thought coming in on a weekday would allow me to get to my shave quickly, but since the 4th of July was the following day, everybody had this day off, so I had to spend a half-hour waiting.  Oh, well.  With tip: $14.
• This is The Summer Of Soccer, so I spent a lot of time, and money, reveling in it.  I went to the Black Hart after getting shaved for a Tripleheader of Round of 32 World Cup action.  I got there in time to order a Bloody Mary and a big Italian meat pizza.  I need to use cash more, and going to the barber school (I need money to at least tip), I had an excuse to use cash this time.  With tip, this meal was: $30.
• And I stayed from the early afternoon till deep in the night.  That night, that busker selling Mexican food at the Black Hart came around.  She knows my face now.  I ordered tacos, which were good, although a bit overpriced (IMHO) at: $10.
• Thursday the 2nd -- got out of work in time to see the Portugal-Croatia Round of 32 Match in its entirety, and in fact I had time to go to El Taco Riendo to watch it.  Had two rounds of food and drink: Chilaquiles and a Corona for the First Half, then esquites and a fountain Coke for the Second Half.  With tip it all came out to: $34.86.
• That night I wanted to see Switzerland-Algeria and this Mediterranean place close by me which was advertising them broadcasting the World Cup.  It was somewhat of a disaster, as I detailed here, but the food (Dubai chocolate cake) and drink (Adeni tea) was nice.  With tip: $16.
• Wednesday the 1st: More soccer.  Went to the Black Hart.  Decided on a whim that I was going to get a burrito from the Mexican food busker even though I wasn't planning on it.  Cost: $5.
• And since I used cash for her, I needed to use cash somewhere else.  Even though I charged everything at the Black Hart up till that point, I decided I needed to give a tip to stick to my OCD principle of using money at least twice if I am using it at all: $1.
• Looks like I have to go all the way back to Saturday, June 20.  I enjoyed some World Cup soccer in the afternoon at the Black Hart, where I got a dirty vodka martini.  With tip I spent: $10.
• I then went to see ******a at My Favorite Stripclub (I don't know if I need to say "Cover Version/Edition/Division" anymore).  This was the first time I saw ******a since she, uh, made all my stripper fantasies come true when she came over to rub me down, tee-hee.  It wasn't awkward, although I made a couple faint allusions over what she did to me.  Got 20 table dances from her.  With cover, tips and drinks for the both of us, the grand total came out to: $231.
• On Friday the 19th I went to Chimborazo to see my smart people group.  I hadn't seen them in a while, and I wanted to, especially since Chimborazo is both relatively close to work, from which I was planning on going to, and relatively close to home, to which I would leave Chimborazo to hopefully see the Brazil-Haiti World Cup Match in its entirety.  I was able to make it to the restaurant at our appointed time.  Work wasn't the issue; a sudden hailstorm was, but I braved through it.  The place was packed and therefore too loud for me to start any conversation with even the people at the table I was eating with.  That's not really conducive to a relaxing atmosphere (turns out that when I left, which was well after the Brazil-Haiti Match started), several other members of my party left, too), but I am glad this great Ecuadorean restaurant is doing well.  With tip I spent: $60.
• On Sunday, June 7 I went to my alumni spot to see my college baseball team choke away a lead both in this Game and their Super Regional series.  Very disappointing.  Plus tip: $35.
• Later that day I think I drove all the way to *****y's place to see her.  Gosh, I can't do that again - too far!  Anyway: $150.
• Wednesday, June 3: Quick tryst with ******e for only: $120.
• Finally, on Monday, June 1, ******a came over and made all the fantasies I had about a stripper servicing me come true.  Who says you can't have a clean dancer go dirty if you convince them?  All that and a bomb-ass massage for: $150.

Good through July 11.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Twins (Last Week: -2).  Have to admit the Twins had a good Week.  Maybe it helped that they didn't play Thursday or Monday.  But they went into the Bronx over the weekend for three Games and won a series versus The New York Yankees since 2014.  And they've come home and taken the first two Games vs. Cleveland.  Sure, they're still in third place in the Division, but only two Games behind The Chicago White Sox.  And oh, sure, they're still a Game below .500, but the Starting Pitching has been very good, led by Joe Ryan and Taj Bradley, both of whom spun gems this screening Week.  And I heard somewhere that the Lineup is the best in the majors ... at something from some point in the season.  Bullpen's still a damn mess, but have to give flowers here; things are alright for the organization, at least right now.

After going for the sweep of the Guardians this/Thursday afternoon, they host The Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim Angels Of Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim ... for a trio this weekend, and that will take Major League Baseball to the All-Star Break ... which Ryan will attend but Byron Buxton, who was voted in, will not play (he might attend) because he is injured.

#-2: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  And shout out to Cheryl Reeve, who became the WNBA's all-time Wins leader for Head Coaches after the Lynx beat The Bastard Orlando Miracle in Uncasville last/Wednesday night.  Unfortunately, Connecticut came to Target Center on Monday and upset the Lynx, 90-89.  This may be an improving Connecticut team, but it's also one that's being taken away from Connecticut to resurrect The Houston Comets next season.  I think the dead home crowd was a big reason the Lynx won.

And this split home-and-home comes after Friday's 13-Point Loss in New York on Friday, making this a 1-2 screening Week, I think the first screening Week the Lynx have been below .500.  I'm sorry, but things aren't functioning like they should now.  Dorka Juhasz is finally back, and that should have been the point where this squad, as well as they have played overall, locks together and becomes really good.  But her return coincided with Olivia Miles taking days off due to injury.  And that doesn't solve all the Points in the paint the Lynx gave up to Connecticut Monday in their Loss.  I'm still waiting for Napheesa Collier to come back and shore up that deficiency.  But I have to be pessimistic and note that, for all the hope this club has instilled in Lynx fans, they still haven't won a goddamn title since 2017.  And there is still some regular season left to go.

They at least begin a four-Game homestand with contests against said Liberty, Phoenix and Los Angeles this Week.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  In an extremely light schedule this screening Week (I think it's because the Commissioner's Cup Final was on Tuesday and they wanted to clear the rest of the league sked to center that), the Lynx on their only Game, 85-77 over The Bastard Detroit/Tulsa Shock in Dallas.  They are a very good team, but right now, the Lynx have their number ... just like maybe The Bastard Utah Starzzz, New York, and maybe Atlanta and Washington have the Lynx's.

Regardless, they still have The Best Record In The WNBA, and even though they might not need it, the cavalry still came this Week.  After long injuries and rehab, both Napheesa Collier and Dorka Johasz (the latter actually sat out last Year because she was too tired from playing overseas for the 2024-5 season) starting practicing.  I don't have any reason to believe neither player is not on schedule, so if they progress like they should, their fresh legs should be back in time to terrorize the paint against every opponent for the rest of the season.  Thank Buddha; I think part of the reason they petered out both previous postseasons is they were fatigued at the end.  Getting full effort from, at worst, The Third-Best Player In The W -- when the Lynx are tops in the league without her and Juhasz -- in the stretch run is like trading for a blockbuster player.  Actually, I kind of feel bad for Natasha Howard, the 4/5 both Collier and Juhasz will take minutes from.  She's revitalized her career to the point she might be named an All-Star at noon today/Thursday.

The club and league get back into the swing of things this Week.  There's a big one in New York tomorrow/Friday night, then they have a home-and-home vs. The Bastard Orlando Miracle (here Monday, there Wednesday).

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  I don't want to completely ignore the Twinks.  After all, they went 2-1 in both series they played this screening Week, home versus Colorado and at Houston.  I just don't have anything else to say about them, mostly because I've been World Cup-pilled.  Well, I believe that Byron Buxton has been largely injury-free for the second Year in a row (knock on wood), and even though I wish we could've seen this level of health early in his career, better late than never.  He's the squad's surefire All-Star.

In the Bronx to take on the Yankees this weekend for three, then home to play Cleveland for three beginning on Tuesday.

I was going to blog post about me deciding to attend the Women's PGA Championship at Hazeltine (tl;dr in case I don't ever get back around to talking about it: I'm glad I went) or the time Friday I went downtown just to watch the World Cup and a growing party just fucking got in my way.  But before I left for Hazeltine yesterday/Sunday I juice half a lemon and got 35 mL out of it.  That meant I had to drink two cocktails, and since I got back so late I had only till 9:30 p.m. (I juiced them around 11:30 a.m. and I think you have up to ten hours before the juice starts to taste bleh) to use them, and I realized while watching Red Sox-Yankees on NBC that it was past 9, so I made and downed a lemon drop martini and then quickly followed that up with a between the sheets, and not only do I have a pounding headache, I think I may have poisoned myself.

So, to summarize, that is what I'm blog posting about ... while also providing a possible cause of death in case I don't wake up in the morning.

Golf Or Soccer?

Tonight was where my paralysis is at its worst.  I don't know what to do between two things I want to do, and the variables are either so even or so unknowable that I am completely a waste.  Since I got home (early) from World Cup viewing I took a nap and surfed the Internet.  All because I cannot decide if I want to drive all the way to Chaska to watch the Women's PGA Championship in Hazeltine, or watch the first Round of 32 World Cup Matchup between Canada and South Africa at this new Mediterranean place close by me.

One of the main things I use to determine what I should do is figuring out the chances I'll be able to do it in the future.  While the World Cup is every four Years (and I'm just watching it on TV), who knows the next time a golf major comes to town.  Using that factor, I should be going to the Women's PGA, and it's a no-brainer.

But there are a lot of things that are making me balk.  One is the weather.  It's supposed to get very humid starting today/Sunday, with dewpoints bursting through the seventies in the afternoon.  I am not a fan of humid weather, and I don't know if I can stomach sweating through my clothes for a few hours (at least).  Compare that with when I went to Sunday Singles at the Ryder Cup, which was also held at Hazeltine.  That was held in late September, and there was no heat or the humidity to contend with then.

What may be more of an annoyance, however, is that I don't necessarily find watching golf in person all that enjoyable.  I remember I went to the 3M Classic (when it was part of the Seniors Tour, not the current 3M Open for the PGA) a few times because it was at the course close by and it was free.  That was in the dog days of summer, and my goodness, it was hot.  I was able to endure, but it kept dawning on me that I'm doing a lot of walking around and a lot of sweating, and it overpowered any joy in watching great golfers play.  Also, and this may be too obvious, but golf courses are big.  You have to walk miles if you want to watch the whole thing.  And I don't know the first thing of the layout of Hazeltine.  Sure, there will be maps of the course, but I'm bad at directions.  Also, I don't know who I want to follow.  Should I just park myself at the 18th green?  What if the tournament is decided before then?  And how about the sightlines?  Will I be able to see anything besides the backs of people's heads?

Still, it's a major.  And while I won't know exactly how it'll feel tomorrow, I kept checking the forecast and it has said, for at least the past few days, that temperatures will hit 80 in the afternoon and the sky will be cloudy.  Considering the dewpoint, if the forecast called for sun, no way would I go.  I would not be able to deal with it being that humid and having the Sun beat down on me.  But overcast?  Yeah, it'll be 80 degrees and it'll feel swampy.  But I won't feel like I'm frying from the Sun's rays.  I might have a chance to at least tough it out.

There are other determinations, too.  If I'm going to watch the soccer Match, the place is so, so close.  I could drive the minivan and give my car a rest.  And speaking of my car -- I finally had the chance to check the oil in my car inbetween Games yesterday/Saturday, and the damn stick was dry.  I poured half a quart of oil and checked later, and then I saw some oil on the dipstick.  But it kind of freaked me out, and that is making me think I should give my car a break.  Finally, I really, really do need to do chores (going through my stuff and washing dishes mostly), and I won't do it if I have a 40-minute drive back from Carver County and am too pooped to do anything once I get home.

Still, it's a major.  So I am going to sleep on it and, depending on when I wake up and what the sky looks like and how hot it feels, I'll either make the drive to watch the best female golfers in the world play in my neck of the woods or I'll just puss out and watch soccer while eating shawarma ten minutes away from me.  These are the days where I want some deity to give me a sign that definitely tells me to do this or that.  Why can't I have that?

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  A trio of relatively close call this screening Week.  Went to Golden State Friday and left remaining perfect over the Valkyries after a six-Point Win.  (It appears as though their fan base is getting obsessed over the fact their team has yet to beat the Lynx.  I don't think Lynx fans think about the Valks the same way.  So the sports analogy is: Lynx:Valkyries::Michigan:Michigan St.)  Then they had a home-and-home with The Washington Mystics and, unfortunately, they first lost at home to them Sunday by five.  The Lynx, however, returned the favor last/Wednesday, defeating them in D. C. by a pair.  This Mystics squad is getting to be dangerous; they have a 1-2 duo in Sonia Citron and Kiki Iriafen (who graduated from my alma mater), and they have a way of mucking things up, as evidenced by their two Games vs. Minnesota.  Add the bevy of whistles that occurred in both tilts, and you have trench warfare against a young club that seems to be gelling.

(Oh, and they got next Year's First Round Draft pick from The Chicago Sky, who keep acquiring OK players for the here and now in exchange for selections that, because the Sky continue to suck anyways, are extremely high.  The pick that landed the Lynx Olivia Miles was a trade for which Chicago wanted to move up to select Angel Reese, who's now with Atlanta.  Chicago traded away their First Rounder next season to get Jacy Sheldon from Washington.  The Sky are on track to have the second-worst record in the WNBA this Year, and thus the second-best odds for next Year's Draft Lottery.  The Mystics may get to the postseason this Year and have, at worst, the chance to draft Rory Harmon or Hannah Hidalgo ... and, if the ping pong balls fall right, the #1 pick and JuJu Watkins.)

One other thing about this road-and-road split between these two teams: Both of them hosted their annual Pride Night Games against each other.  So Minnesota and Washington ruined the other's Pride Night.  Sweet!  Turnabout is fair play!

Minnesota, who, despite the stumble, still have The Best Record In The WNBA, have only one Game this screening Week.  But it's a big one -- at Dallas Sunday afternoon.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -2).  They began the Week completing a three-Game sweep at The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0. and finished it getting swept at home versus The Bastard Brooklyn Dodgers.  In the middle they won a series in Arizona, but finished the week 3-4.

So I was at last/Wednesday's night Game.  Target Field was or was nearly sold out to watch Shohei Ohtani pull double duty.  What I didn't know till recently was that he lost his last two starts, so it made sense that he really stumbled in the Second Inning, allowing three Runs, a lot of it on grounders that made their way through the Infield.  But while he lasted only six Innings, he was pretty good besides that Inning, striking out eight.  That is one fewer, however, that Twins Starting Pitcher Joe Ryan, who struck out nine but gave up three Runs one half-Inning after Ohtani got shaken down.  Add that scoring started in the top of the Second on a solo Home Run by Mookie Betts -- his 300th of his career, by the way -- and even though both Bullpens shut down the teams from the bottom of the Third through Byron Buxton's swinging Strikeout to end the Game, Los Angeles completed a sweep with a 4-3 Win.

(Interesting note: The most memorable thing about Ohtani's performance last/Wednesday night was him at the plate.  He was the first batter Anthony Banda faced after he came in for Ryan.  Banda's Pitch on 3-1 was called a Strike, but Ohtani made a challenge ... and it did get the corner, so the call was confirmed and the count ran full.  The next Pitch was called a Ball, but now Twins Catcher Victor Caratini issued a challenge ... and that Pitch also grabbed the corner, so what was a Walk turned into a Strikeout.  What an at-bat.)

So anyway, that will probably be the last time I step foot in Target Field to watch a Twins Game for the next, oh, two seasons.  They host Colorado for three over the weekend beginning tomorrow/Friday, then have a trio at scuffling Houston.

Isn't Shohei Ohtani Ruining My Plans?

I have today/Wednesday off.  I have had this day planned off for some time.  I had changed it to going to the dentist's in case I needed to go back a second time this month to fill in all the cavities, but I didn't, so I reverted back to my original reason for taking that day off: To at least catch one full day of World Cup Matches that wouldn't short-staff my co-workers.  (Turns out work has been very light since last week, for some strange reason, so that reason is pretty much moot.  Also, I was going to take the whole week off, plus the back half of last week off, in anticipation of being hired for The Special Olympics, but that didn't happen.)

That was before I remembered that The Los Angeles Dodgers, my baseball team when I was out there for college, was in town and, in fact, in town for a three-Game series Monday through today.  I was going to skip it because hey, it's the World Cup, something I won't see for another four Years (well, at least the Men's; the Women's comes up next summer).  But then I checked the pitching matchup: Today, Shohei Ohtani pitches.  I know Ohtani is probably awesome to watch when he's just batting.  But he's a unicorn in that he's in the Lineup even when he's the Starting Pitcher.  His continued success doing both makes him, according to a growing chorus of baseball experts and fans, The Best Baseball Player In History.  Yes, even better than Babe Ruth.  For that reason alone, I think I need to see him do both in person.  It might be more than four Years before he comes to Target Field and does this again, if he ever does.  And, and this is relatively minor, but Joe Ryan is hurling for the Twins.  Great matchup.

I just convinced myself that going to the Twins Game tonight/Wednesday is the right thing to do.  But I wanted to blog post that I have altered my long-held plan to just plop my butt at a pub to watch soccer all day.  So, in that sense I've, well, usurped myself.  This is not the reason I was taking today off.  And I have to note that the Twins Game is badly timed.  The tripleheader of World Cup Matches are at 2, 5 and 8.  The baseball Game's at 6:40.  Plus, parking might be a bear because of Ohtani pitching.  So the plan I have now -- going downtown early to (hopefully) find parking and pay (ugh), watching the 2 o'clock Matches, then doing ... um, something and then heading to the ballpark relatively early -- has a lot of downtime that can't be filled by watching soccer Games in their entirety, which is something I really, really want to do.  It might not make sense to go downtown early to watch soccer.  So, taking that into account, why take off work?  Why not just go from work to the baseball Game?  If work is light again today/Wednesday, I could even stop at home and change, or even nap.

Eh, whatever.  I have the day off.  I'm going to see Ohtani pitch and hit, and whatever else I have the energy to do, I'll do.

He's A Little Bitch

So I stumbled on this account on Bluesky that tracks and notifies you when someone blocks you.  I didn't seek it out, but like I said, I just came across it, and without thinking about it beyond saying to myself, "You know, I might want to know who hates me," I followed it.

There is a guy I follow.  This little bitch will remain nameless so my dissection of him (hopefully) remains untraceable.  He's a local person who likes sports and keenly follows the Lynx.  I like the Lynx and local sports, so I followed him.  He skeeted the World Cup schedule, specifically that there are quadruple-headers from today/Sunday until Tuesday, then tripleheaders where two Matches go on simultaneously for the next three days after that.  All I said -- all I said! -- was that this was a soccer orgy.  A little later, the block Bluesky account told me that this snowflake blocked me.

For what?!  I just wanted to confirm with him that he regarded it as a soccer orgy.  What the fuck is the problem with that?!?!  Does he not think my wit is refined?  Does he hate the word "orgy?"  What the fuck is wrong with him?!?!?!  So I did the mature thing and blocked his ass in return.  And then I worried about all the other Lynx/Minnesota sports accounts I follow on Bluesky and wonder if they would take his side over mine.

And then I had to stop myself and remember something all of us too often forget: This is social media.  This is the fucking Internet.  I don't know this guy.  I like (well, liked) his stuff, but I don't know him.  And even if I am butthurt, I have to remember that this guy doesn't know who the fuck I am and doesn't give two shits about me even if I did like and repost every skeet he made.  So even though it hurts to seemingly be rejected by someone whose work I admire ... I'm getting bent out of shape over some motherfucker I don't know.  Why am I so upset?

Maybe it's better to be ignorant.  Maybe it's better to not know who blocks you on Bluesky.  But once I realize this doesn't affect my life in any meaningful way, I'll get over it.  But he's still a little bitch.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: 0).  In a possible WNBA Finals preview Saturday, the Lynx suffered their third Loss of the season at Las Vegas.  Head-to-head is the first (and, come to think of it, it should be the only) tie-breaker for the Commissioner's Cup, and since The Bastard Utah Starzzz beat Phoenix last/Wednesday night, they're going to face New York for the million-dollar payday.

That's why I can't rise the Lynx above negative number this Week.  But they did rout Portland at home on Monday and Los Angeles last/Wednesday night.  And, yes, they faced Vegas without Napheesa Collier and lost only by three.  And they came back to take the lead late in the Game, mostly courtesy of Olivia Miles, who has become the new sensation in the WNBA.  The Spectacle/The Show/O-Mi had no fear in driving on Aja Wilson ... and scoring.  She pretty much single-handedly brought Minnesota back into the Game.  And against L. A., she poured in 31 Points on 12-for-15 shooting.  Forget Rookie Of The Year; she's got that sewn up.  There is solid, incessant talk that she might be MVP.  She's making a case for it now.

So, even though they didn't make the Commissioner's Cup title Game, they're still on top of the league, and they're not even at full strength yet.  Maybe this team with a championship pedigree can come through and actually win the championship.  This screening Week they visit Golden State and then have a home-and-home with Washington.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -1).  They're an afterthought in this market, but they didn't have a bad Week.  Sure, it started with an 11-0 shellacking to end their season at Detroit last Thursday afternoon.  But they won their weekend series here over St. Louis, with both Wins by a Run.  And they've already won their series at The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0, doubling up Texas 4-2 Monday and then sextupling them 12-2 Tuesday night.  Byron Buxton remains (mostly) healthy, the bats are waking up, and the Bullpen ain't complete garbage.

I was wondering in last Week's WMNSS why the third Game of their current series skipped a Day and is being played this/afternoon.  I saw why last/Wednesday night.  Globe Life Field is in the vicinity of AT&T Stadium, the home of The Dallas Cowboys ... but is being renamed Dallas Stadium because of the World Cup.  And there was a Game there between England and Croatia.  (The English doubled up the Croats, 4-2.)  Two sporting events happening in the same area not only on the same Day but overlapping each other would be a traffic and security nightmare, so I'm guessing the two baseball teams asked for and were granted by Major League Baseball permission to push their getaway Game back a Day.  After that they travel to Arizona to play three at the Diamondbacks over the weekend, then they come home to host The Bastard Brooklyn Dodgers for a trio beginning on Monday.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  The Lynx are in the thick of Commissioner's Cup play, and they're kicking ass, going 3-0 this Week and remaining undefeated for this in-season tournament.  I was at the first Game of the screening Week, home last Thursday to Golden State.  They started off great, but then from the middle of the Second Quarter on, the Valkyries asserted control, and Minnesota was a click or two behind.  Finally, in the Fourth, they put shots together, they stacked stops, and was very, very lucky Cecilia Zandalasini's Three-Point shot at the gun was an airball.  (Courtney Williams could've iced it, but she missed her second Three Throw to keep the lead at three.  Tsk-tsk.)

Like Anthony Edwards, I am starting to believe I was wrong about Olivia Miles.  I remember throwing my glasses on the table on the table I was sitting at in the bar, listening to the WNBA Draft and hearing that the Lynx took Miles.  I thought she didn't have the will to defend nor the jump shot to round out her game in a way that, say, Ricky Rubio really couldn't.  Well, Miles went offensive HAM on this bitch, setting a WNBA record for most Threes made by a Rookie in a Game with eight.  Also, I wasn't quite aware at how preternatural her court vision is.  And finally, she has the poise of a veteran.  In the possession that led to Court splitting her pair, there was a Lay-Up drive that missed.  Miles eventually gathered the ball and, instead of hoisting up quickly, pulled the ball out and forced Golden State to foul.  I totally forgot the game situation, namely that there was about ten Seconds left and Minnesota was up by one.  Miles did not forget.  Fucking genius.

They finish Comissioner's Cup pool play this Week.  They host Portland Monday and visit Los Angeles on Wednesday.  But the real big test, if not THE test, comes Saturday night when they visit Las Vegas.  For my money, right now (and take that with more than a grain of salt), Saturday's matchup will be the WNBA Finals.

#-1: Twins (Last Week: -2).  A 2-4 Week.  There isn't much worth to say other than the Bullpen fuckin' sucks.  Yeah, that's all I want to say about this execrable bunch.  Well, I should say that they finish up their series in Detroit this/Thursday afternoon, then quickly host St. Louis for three over the weekend, then travel to play The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0 for three-Game set on Monday, Tuesday and ... Thursday???