The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: United FC (Last Week: -1).  Oh, look, the Loons made The Guardian a week ago.  It's a story, and you should read it, on how MNUFC are going all-in on kicking or throwing the soccer ball into the opposing box on Set Pieces as much as humanly possible.  They are causing chaos getting the ball so close to the net, and they are scoring Goals at a rate that Moneyball acolytes are getting erections over.  With that being said ... don't you always want to throw or kick the ball to the net whenever possible?  It sounds obvious to me until it's pointed out that it hasn't been done until now.

It looks as though Major League Soccer has finally paid attention.  What has been noticed is that for long Throw-Ins, it's Michael Boxall doing the throwing.  For the Match Saturday night against San Jose, Chicho Arango tried to block Boxy's throw by jumping.  The Referee finally stopped play, told Chicho he couldn't do that, and actually used his spray paint to dry a line from which he couldn't cross.  Tee-hee.

No matter.  United FC scored twice on Set Pieces, two Minutes in via Tani Oluwaseyi and in First Half Stoppage Time via revelation Anthony Markanich.  It was odd and yet very refreshing (unhealthy air notwithstanding) to see a Minnesota team handle a foe so thoroughly, which they did in defeating the Earthquakes (who were wearing a 70's-inspired throwback uniform, very nice), 4-1.  And with Vancouver continuing to falter, the Loons are now in second place in the West, only two Points behind expansion side San Diego FC.

By the end of this screening Week, this team will have played six Games over 16 Days.  Tonight they host LAFC, and on Saturday they visit Portland.  For tonight/Wednesday night's Match, they will debut their Change Strip/Heritage/Third Kit, which is a throwback and homage to the first men's pro soccer team in the state, The Minnesota Kicks of The North American Soccer League.  I've seen it, it's online and it'll be on sale beginning at 9 in the morning ... and it probably will be sold out by the time I get to Allianz Field.  They're pretty damn sweet sweaters.  So sweet, in fact, that I wish the Loons took the Kicks name.  I know it's an entirely different league, but still.  The only worry is that the team will begin to lose wearing those alternate jerseys.

#-2: Lynx (Last Week: -2).  OK, beyond me still being pissed over the Commissioner's Cup Final Loss (and I am still pissed), I am now genuinely fearful of how this squad is playing.  They finished off a lackluster 2-2 screening Week where they fell to red-hot Phoenix in the Mercury's camp Game Wednesday afternoon, outlasted Los Angeles in the Sparks' camp Game the next afternoon, then fell way behind and failed to complete the comeback in Chicago Saturday before winning the back half of the two-Game series versus the Sky on Monday.

They're 5-3 for the month of July.  While it could be worse, and they still lead the W with a 19-4 record, this is not the form of a championship club.  Of course, they just played four Games over a seven-Day period, and their schedule this month has been exceedingly busy.  Whether things straighten themselves out once they get into a less hectic part of their schedule or if this run of not-stellar results exposes depth issues (they dumped Alissa Pilli, their First Round Draft pick last season, by the way) from which they won't recover remains to be seen.

Nonetheless, the All-Star Break came just in time, even though Napheesa Collier and Kayla McBride (the latter a late substitute) are playing in the All-Star Game in Indianapolis Saturday night and Courtney Williams is participating in the Skills Competition Friday night.  But first they have to host their own camp Game, which is against said Phoenix (who now have the second-best record in the league and are only three Games behind the Lynx) this/Wednesday afternoon.  Coming out of the break, they host said Chicago on Tuesday.

#-3: Twins (Last Week: -3).  See, as much as the Twins (and Major League Baseball) are taking fans' hearts and throwing in the trash through inattention and incompetence, it sometimes is easy to win them back.  Take, for instance, Friday's matchup vs. Pittsburgh.  It helps tremendously that maybe the most-hyped Pitcher in the MLB, Paul Skenes, was playing, and that he was opposed by the Twins' best, Joe Ryan.  A Pitchers' duel will fill the seats, and by God, Target Field filled all of them -- it was a sellout of 40,100 (I didn't know Target Field could pack in 40,000!), and they were treated to, yes, a Pitchers' duel.  And it probably was a surprise that Ryan out-dueled Skenes, with the Pirates' one Run scored in the top of the Fourth Inning (courtesy of a Double by former Twin Isiah Kiner-Falefa) raised in the bottom of the Fourth via Trevor Larnach launching Skenes' hanging Curveball into the flowerbed in Right-Centerfield with Byron Buxton aboard:

All those cameraphone lights lit up for Jhoan Duran as he came out in the top of the Ninth, and although he allowed the tying Run aboard, he struck out Adam Frazier and Kiner-Falefa to preserve one of those Wins only baseball can give you.  Man, I wish I were there.

That was the standout victory in a 3-2 Week for the Twins, who are still under .500 and on the outside looking in for a playoff spot.  (Congratulations, by the way, to both Ryan and Buxton for their All-Star nods.)  But this weekend, coming back from the break, they get to play three Games at Colorado, who may be The Worst Team In MLB History.  Unfortunately for Minnesota, they play at the Dodgers for three Games starting on Monday.