Anna. Paquin's. Titties!!!

As I said in my previous post, my entertainment lately has been all True Blood. It's been marked by late-night appearances by its star, Anna Paquin. I don't know about you, but she came off as somewhat of a stuck-up bitch. But one thing she and Jimmy Fallon talked about "pricked" my interest: Unlike that other hot vampire entertainment vehicle, Twilight, True Blood "has a lot of sex."

Sex, you say? Anna Paquin, the Oscar winner for The Piano when she was 11, she doesn't get bare-ass naked ... DOES SHE? She's too much of a star to do this ... ISN'T SHE?? She wouldn't debase herself by getting naked -- and not even for a prestigious movie, but an HBO series ... RIGHT???

So I Googled "anna paquin's titties." And guess what? SHE DOES, SHE DOES, SHE DOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She's showed them cute A-cup sweater puppies twice in fucking scenes with her co-star/real-life boyfriend, Stephen Moyer (who's 13 years older than she, which is another thing that makes me respect her less 'cause, um, ick, but, ironically, arouses me even more). Here's video of her second fucking scene, from last month (hat tip to NSFW POA, fast becoming my favorite site):


Anna Paquin Nude True Blood Season 2 -

I wish I could post pictures of her first fucking scene from the first season last year, but I don't know how to do that, so I'm just going to post the NSFW POA webpage where you can see those.

What kills me -- and this is yet another thing that makes me think I wouldn't like her if we somehow got into a conversation, even though it too makes me think that quirk is also what's so hot about her -- is that, in this week's Entertainment Weekly, Paquin says showin' dem titties ain't no thang: "I wouldn't have signed up for it if I wasn't game. I just never really grew up in a culture or household where [nudity] was a big deal." Not a big deal? Actresses who get naked for scenes always seem to say that. Don't they know that the viewers (well, the guys and lesbians) look forward to them getting naked, that for them it is a big deal? I never get the disconnect.

In fact, I believe there has to be something ... strange about an actress, especially an Oscar-winning, relatively well-known, young and nubile one who has earned her chops and seemed in no way to be in a career slump that would make one think she would need to surrender the pink, deciding to surrender the pink. I can't believe that Anna Paquin, 26-year-old Anna Paquin, said to herself: "In what may be the prime of my career as an adult actress, I want to devote the next half-decade of my life, and even risk being typecast, in a role where I'm required to flash my boobies and simulate sex with a guy with fake fangs at least once a season." As tough an industry acting is, I can't imagine that anyone that young with so many accomplishments to her name reached such a decision. Maybe Heather Graham reached such a conclusion when he followed up giving us a look at her sweet right tit in The Hangover a dozen years after showing her hee-hees and hoo-hah in Boogie Nights. The differences are that Graham isn't on a TV series where the potential to expose your mammaries exists constantly, and she's thirteen years older than Paquin (same age as Moyer, Paquin's boyfriend, BTW.)

Bottom line is, if both Graham and Paquin keep getting naked in front of us for money, they're nothing more than Hollywood-approved porn stars. Not that I'm complaining. But if you're ready and willing to parade in front of the camera in a birthday suit more than once, and you're not heinous, you damn well better know that there are people watching at home who don't give two flyin' rats' asses about such trivial bullshit like the "storyline" or the "character arcs" or "the physical expression of this couple's love for each other." She might think this is part of her craft, or she truly may not really give a damn about getting naked for the role. All we care about is seeing Rogue's boobs! Show me where babies feed, Rogue!

You know, I should be somewhat disgusted because I saw this girl when she was a shortie in The Piano, and now I'm about to wank my dick over her 15 years later. Such drooling depravity over a child actor makes me think of the Olsen Twins, whose impending 18th birthdays were marked by an online countdown. That shit actually made me sick; they're children, I thought to myself, and children don't excite me sexually! Same thing should happen with Paquin. But since there was no countdown for her, I guess I don't see that 11-year-old girl when I see her take her clothes off and get (fake) twat-stabbed by a guy whom she fell in love with IRL. Meanwhile, I fall in love with her Hollywood starlet tits, even though they are tiny.

I am now obsessed with Anna Paquin's titties. And I blame you, True Blood and HBO, for promoting the show so goddamn much I can't get dem titties out of my mind.

All I can say when I watch the show now is, Show dem titties!!! Or at least I would if I had cable.

And now I will go to the bathroom and touch myself.