Horizontal Blinds Broken

They broke just before my parents left.  Hard to explain, since I'm busy catching up on YouTube videos on how to replace blinds and therefore need to know the fucking vocabulary of blinds, but the, like, string on one section broke, so one side is slumping real bad right now.  It's still up, and it's still covering my window, which are the most important things, but it's going to continue to slump, and I'm scared that in the middle of the night it'll just, like, break completely and fall down, and so people could see right into my bedroom, and I would either be sleeping naked or be in the middle of masturbating or something.

I don't know how to fix it, or even if I could.  I think I need to ask my parents not how to replace the blinds, but if they somehow bought these in bulk and, if so, where's the spare blinds.  Because I could see Father doing that.  And then he'll get all confused and tell me to figure out how to replace the blinds myself -- "Learn how to do it!" -- and then I'll get all pissed off and say, "Of course I have to learn!  You're not even here!  And that's not what I'm asking you, asshole!"

So I'm kind of stressed out.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Vikings (Re-Entry!).  So far, so good.  Yes, it's one Game, and I have to continue to remember that while the Vikings' biggest rival are the Packers, the Packers' biggest rival aren't the Vikings, it's the Bears, so I think we need to check ourselves of that emotional dissonance.

But hey -- 23-7 to start off The Kevin O'Connell Era with a Win!  More notably, the Offense was a distinct change from the "fear-based" philosophy of previous Head Coach Mike Zimmer.  They opened up and in fact relied on the passing Game, and Justin Jefferson feasted to the tune of a record-high day in Yards and two Touchdowns.  Dalvin Cook may have seemed like an afterthought, but he racked up more than 100 Yards from scrimmage.  And the Defense pestered Aaron Rodgers all afternoon.  As a Vikings fan, I never can say a Game is over until it's really over.  But just before the Fourth Quarter, when the Greg Joseph made a Field Goal and the Packers punted, was when I could breathe a sigh of relief.  Many other Vikings fans say they thought this Game was in the bag.  I think they're lying.

Anyway, you can wave away Minnesota dominating on Sunday more to the Packers' deficiencies.  Both of Rodgers' starting Tackles didn't play, and that's a big reason why the Vikes sacked A-Rodg four times.  What may be a more ongoing concern for the Pack moving forward are the green Wide Receivers that Rodgers is left with since Davante Adams was traded to The Bastard Oakland-by-way-of-Los Angeles Raiders.  That drop by WR Christian Watson early in the Game could have changed the complexion of it from what it eventually became.  People think the WRs will eventually learn, but will they?

This still goes down as a victory, and there are high hopes going into the Monday night contest in Philadelphia.  And hey, even if they lose, this is the first season for KOC -- who cares?

#-2: Gopher football (Re-Entry!).  I noticed something in college football -- and not at the U.  UCLA last Week beat Alabama St.  That is second-division Alabama St.  It is the first time in UCLA program history where the Bruins played an FCS school.

Notre Dame has yet to play a Game vs. a second-division opponent ... but that will change next season, when they host Tennessee St.  That leaves one and only one program to never sully and whore themselves by stooping so low as to play an FCS team: My alma mater.  That was close to ending, however; several Years back, they scheduled a Game against Cal-Davis.  That was scrapped (with a penalty given to the Aggies for breaking the contract) once Mike Bohn became Athletic Director.  I thought the thinking was that those three schools would remain untainted.  Well, joke's on my school, I guess, because both UCLA and Notre Dame decided to dance with the trollops for a free and easy Win.  I hope my school doesn't puss out and schedule one, ever.  They're now the only ones, and that's a distinction that's worth holding onto.

Oh yeah, so the Gophers beat the ever-living shit out of FCS Western Illinois Saturday, 62-10.  This is a Win that means nothing.

And the next opponent at least plays not that much better.  Colorado is not just a top-flight school, but one that's in a BcS conference (albeit the Pac-12), and it has won a Mythical National Championship in my lifetime.  But they suck right now, and they got shut out at home by these Gophers last Year.  The Buffaloes return the favor, visiting Huntington Bank this/Saturday afternoon in a tilt that the U. should win easily.  But hey, at least it's a top-flight program the Gophs are playing.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  "Four Seasons In One Day" is a beautiful song, one of many, by Crowded House, an extremely underrated band in rock 'n' roll.  And it's like the Loons are going through the fourth season of the 2022 season, the one where things appear to be falling apart, and where players are off the pitch due to either season-ending injury or card discipline.  And yet, as they are falling through the standings, they've still got a chance.

It ain't a great result, their 1-all Draw versus LAFC (Laugh-See) at Allianz on what I want to say is the first MLS Match MNUFC has ever played on a Tuesday.  The Loons score was by, you guessed it, Brent Kallman.  Yep, the last holdover from the team's lower-division days.  Have I talked about this?  When he was re-signed in the offseason, I greeted it warmly because it maintained the last tangible cord to this team's beginnings.  But then Kallman played, filling in for the backliners because of injury or because it was a mid-week Game, and Kallman, well, didn't play well.  Some fans online believe that, since filling in for Bakaye Dibassy, the Defense has gotten so bad it can be the main reason MNUFC lost three in a row.  But there Kallman (a Woodbury native) was, giving head off a Corner Kick from Emmanuel Reynoso that, finally, he didn't overshoot to the other side of the pitch.  No, this was a kick that barely got level with the LAFC near post, and Kallman headed it in short-side to give Minnesota the 1-0 lead.  Kallman also scored against Colorado earlier in the season, and that makes my heart light.  And yet I don't know if Kallman should be back with this team next Year.

But Carlos Vela did Carlos Vela things, dropping an arcing moonshot from just beyond the box, and in the end, they each grabbed a Point.  Yes, the Loons are winless in four, so they're not hosting a playoff Match if the season ended today.  But they are in fifth, fourth-place Nashville is only a Point ahead, and FC Dallas is only in third by four.  Better than that, their last three opponents of the regular season are three of the four worst teams in the Western Conference, starting with tonight's/Saturday night's road Match versus Sporting Kansas City.  Unfortunately, they're going to have to play without Reynoso, who has to sit out this Match for Yellow Card accumulation after picking up one for absurdly holding onto an LAFC player who was about to go on a breakaway from the Loons' defensive zone.  Wasn't Bebelo out for Saturday's 1-0 Loss in Portland for the same reason?  I should be paying more attention.  Anyway, Franco Fragapane is back after serving a card suspension, so the opportunity is there to take three Points from a bad squad even despite having missing and hurting men.  Fingers crossed?

#-4: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -2).  How good can you be if you're finding your stride against a, let's just say, less than stellar slate of non-conference foes?  Good question, and one the U. XI might have answered this screening Week.

They finished their non-con by thrashing Marquette at Robbie Stadium to the tune of 3-0.  That gave the Gophers a four-Match winning streak.  But look at who they beat: Drake, North Dakota, Nebraska-Omaha, and the Golden Eagles.  Only one of those Matches was on the road, and that was vs. The Fighting Hawks, and that was just across the border in Grand Forks, N. D.  Their last Loss was a 1-0 decision at Mississippi St., a BcS school.

And then the Golden Gophers started league play last/Friday night with a 1-0 Loss in Nebraska.  Minnesota kept it close against what one observer thought was the bruising, borderline cheating play of the Cornhuskers.  But apparently it worked, because in the 88th Minute a through ball found the Defender-splitting Sarah Weber, and she deposited it past U. Goalie Megan Plaschko for the Game-winning, and only, score.

I think we can say this club is not very good, and that some scrutiny needs to be aimed at Head Coach Erin Chastain.  A 4-1-4 record (four Wins, one Draw, four Losses -- I think from now on I will use a W-D-L format to put the value of each outcome in descending order) doesn't beget a tournament team.

Off until Thursday, when the squad hosts Indiana.

#-5: Twins (Last Week: -4).  I don't know if I can see the Twinks are done, given that they did sweep the Royals mid-Week and that this is the American League "Comedy" Central.  But this ballclub's second-half collapse still has them, as of press time, five Games behind Cleveland for the Division lead and a Game behind the White Sox for second.  Fuck the Wild Card; at 72-71, winning the Division is the only hope this team has of making the postseason.

That's what you get when everything that propelled you to the top -- an overachieving Rotation and a solid Lineup -- goes to hell on you and you don't have enough talent or depth to get through the rough patches.  That's what you get when the stack of relievers you got for the stretch run at the Trade Deadline crap out on you.  And that's what you get when you allow Cleveland -- an organization that seemed to be more rebuilding than contending at the start of the season, and a franchise who still can't quite stop whispers they'll be moved from The Land -- to come into Target Field and emasculate you by sweeping three Games of an all-important series.  It's happening now, too; they started the return series last/Friday night, and the Twinks allowed the Game-winning Run via a Wild Pitch by the once-reliable Jhoan Duran.

Still, I get the feeling that Twinks fans are going to let the club off the hook.  The narrative that they simply can't compete with the richer ballclubs on the coasts and down South is pretty much gospel now, regardless of the fact ownership really can change that, plus I think the Vikings winning their first Game of the Year, and over the hated Packers, has memory-holed the spiral this team is currently in.  Which is a shame, because, at least right now, I feel as though there's got to be some goddamn accountability for this failure.

Because of rainouts, there will be four more Games with Cleveland before they have a return series at Kansas City beginning Tuesday.  After that, they start a weekend trio vs. The Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim Angels Of Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim Angels Of ... Friday.

#-6: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -1).  You know why I've gotten "disenchanted" with this team and this program?  Fucking bullshit like this past Week, where, at home, versus good teams that are still ranked below them and thus should defeat them, lost to not one but two schools in separate tournaments at Maturi.  And both by four Sets: To Stanford in the B1G/Pac-12 Challenge Saturday, then to Pepperdine Thursday in the Diet Coke Classic.  I don't fucking remember the last time the host Goofers lost in their own Diet Coke Classic, but fuckin' Minnesota did!  They slipped from third to sixth after the Loss to The Farm, and after getting humbled by the Waves, they'll drop further.

A quick scan of a volleyball chatboard after the upset loss to Pepperdine points to two big things: Bad Setter play and shit-ass Defense.  At least one person doesn't think this team has the heart to hate losing enough.  And many U. fans on this board I went to is starting to chafe under the perception Head Coach Hugh McCutcheon simply won't entrust starting jobs at Setter and Libero to new people to see if that unlocks the hitting talent that is prevalent (and has always been prevalent) on this club since Cutch became the guy here.  It's still non-conference season, and another person on the board thinks the Big Ten is going to suffer a down year.  But this Week is evidence the U. is going to be down with it.

One final non-con Match, tonight/Saturday night against Washington St., to finish off the Diet Coke Classic.  (I went last/Friday night to the Sports Pavilion to see Pepperdine come back from 2-1 down to defeat the Cougars in the middle Match of the tourney.  Even though work and trying to find my watch precluded me from getting there until halfway through the Match, I'm glad I got there, and I'm glad that Match went the full five.)  They then begin B1G play Friday at Purdue.

Addendum To: Addendum To: Addendum To: My Meeting In The Morning

Well, this has nothing to do with the meeting I had Wednesday morning, but it had plenty to do with the thing I said at the tail end of it, namely that my outburst would trigger some karma for me when I come in and work in The Fourth Department.  I stayed late by a bit more than an hour, but it was a shitty day, it truly was, for two reasons.  First, I can't remember a day where more e-mail addresses didn't work and bounced back on me.  There were, like, four of them, and so I needed to stay late and think about where else and, failing that, how else and even if I could request the information I need someplace else.

The other reason was one of these stupid goddamn curveballs, a situation where people wanted this test but we refused to give it to them, and I was communicating back and forth with several people about whether we could use this test instead.  Eventually I was told that was this customer wanted, this customer got.  The reason why was explained to me by my former supervisor who has moved to another department.  I don't get it, because if this test was good, and if this customer has always asked for it and always gotten it, why was I told they couldn't get it?  I don't want to even think about this problem anymore, but I know goddamn well this will be the first thing I'll have to re-confront when I walk through that door in the morning.  Fuck.

I really, really want to see this neutral women's volleyball Match between Pepperdine and Washington St. this evening.  But it starts at 5, and I am supposed to get out at 4:30, so getting there by the time the Match starts probably is a no-can-do, and if today is as bad as yesterday, the Match might be half or even more than half over by the time I get to Maturi.  (There's also a good chance it'll rain this evening, and so I'll face another should-I-or-shouldn't-I-go situation like I did last Week with the difference being there isn't a second Match to watch that makes walking through a potential storm worth it.)  And all because I (possibly?) raised some issues in a meeting with my boss and supervisor?  Great.

Addendum To: Addendum To: My Meeting In The Morning

So, that meeting happened yesterday/Wednesday morning ... and what was scheduled as only a half-hour meeting turned into an hour.  Guess I had something to say after all.

Really, though, I hope I didn't come off as complaining.  Turns out I did need to vent my spleen, however, and I guess I did get, uh, triggered when my supervisor wanted to talk about workload.  She communicated that she wanted to ensure that I understood the amount of work that typically comes with this job and, OK, I did get a bit defensive at that.  I told her that I was well aware of the amount of work, having needing to stay up to an extra two hours to finish on many days.  I am not completely sure she understands my thinking on that.  She seemed to keep saying that if I felt pinned down to reach out.  I think I let both my supervisor and my boss know that regardless of how I feel, if there is work that belongs to someone else, that work should go to that someone else.  The possible solution that I think was offered in the meeting, which I want to reach, are possible, uh, conclusions if the work gets to be overwhelming.

We'll see how well we understand each other, my supervisor and I, for I am in The Fourth Department today and tomorrow.  My boss tells me that I probably will be working at least a couple days there every week for the rest of my time at my company.  He also says he's trying to get permission to find a third person who will have the position similar to mine, and that would help.  Regardless, I hope my, uh, outburst yesterday didn't call for bad karma on me the rest of my workweek.

Addendum To: My Meeting In The Morning

Oh yeah, so about this meeting last week ... there was no meeting last week.  I went to work last Wednesday, went to the meeting room, didn't see anybody there, then checked with my boss, who seemed a bit perplexed because he thought the meeting was supposed to happen last Wednesday.  But it, uh, wasn't; he told me that my supervisor (who ostensibly answers to him) said it was going to be the following week, or this/Wednesday morning.  I don't get it; isn't the meeting supposed to happen when, you know, the person who calls the meeting says it's going to happen?

But it's been delayed till today.  Moreover, it'll just be my boss, my supervisor, and me.  There would be my co-worker, but she gets the day off today, and I think that's bad, because this could just be a case where people one and two levels above me just yell at me for things I did and didn't do.  I've vacillated back to the point where I do have things to say and I am going to say them in this meeting, even though the sense that I will be listened to has diminished somewhat without my co-worker there.  But hey, I could get fired from this job at any time for any reason, or for no reason.  Might as well say my piece and reap the consequences.  

Man, I Just Wanna Stay Home

I do a lot of running around in the evenings.  Just last/Monday night I felt like I needed to exercise because of all the free food I ate working sporting events over the weekend, plus I hadn't worked out in a while.  But it's more than that: There's my alma mater's games, there's MNUFC Matches, there's stripper parties, and then there are times where I just want to go out.

But I want to now stay home.  Yeah, that sounds very hypocritical.  But I'm doing so much running around that, as I type this at least, I want to just go home from work and stay home.  Maybe it's time to catch up on going through my stuff, or even cleaning my clothes.  That actually sounds like fun.

What I usually do, however, is watch TV.  And while I usually don't do other stuff when I watch TV, if there's nothing on that I want to watch, I feel as though that gives me more motivation to leave the house and do something else.  That's why the start of the new TV broadcast season (which traditionally commences the day after the Emmys, which was held last/Monday night) might be the thing that finally keeps me home.  There are new seasons for shows that I watch, and I'll stay home and watch them ... and maybe do other productive stuff while at home.  Now, I just need to figure out when those shows come on.

Arranging My Whores For The Next Month Or So

Totally me ... the workweek has started, but I can't help but plan my week, and think about next weekend, and plot which of my girls I will see and when.

I am trying to pace myself, specifically seeing only one of my stripper girlfriends a week for the time being.  More than that and it gets real expensive.

I want to see ******a because I haven't gotten a rubdown from her in a month, and I could use her magic hands.  I want her to cum over this week.  But that pushes ******e to next week, even though her birthday is this week and she's been calling/desperate/thirsty to give her a "birthday gift."  I realized a few days ago that I lent her money for Christmas; is her birthday a good time to remind her of that?

And then there's **y, whose last two parties I've skipped.  It's hella far from me, but if I know in advance when her party is, I think I can go.  But that means I can't see anyone else that week, whenever that week is.  So that's a date that hangs in the air until she gets back to me.

Man, they say arranging when you see your whores is never easy.  Actually, no one says that.

No Rest For The Wicked, Or The Fat

I worked -- or "worked," like I said in my previous blog post -- the Twins Game yesterday and I will be working the Vikings Game today, and with my real job last and this Week, including filling in for someone next Sunday, I will be working eleven days in a row and 17 out of the next 18.  The money's still going out as fast as it's coming in, if not faster, so I kind of need to do this, at least until I exhibit some self-control.

That self-control should extend to my eating.  One of the things I really do love and appreciate about working these Games is all the free food we get.  In that sense, we are well taken care of ... well, for the most part; paying for a hot dog and a brat was something I did not see happening.  But we're never starved at these Games.  Far from it; I had coffee, some snacks, and then lunch was catered, and then I got more coffee, and then the Game started and I had those tubed meats and then (and this probably is the killer) a lot of pop and a huge cup of lemonade.  Oh, and I took home the post-Game meal to eat immediately after I got home.

My excuse, such as it is, is that I hadn't worked a baseball Game in years and so I wanted to load up on all the food offered there.  Can't say that for the football Games, as I'm going maybe on my 15th year or so.  Therefore, I can skip the food I can get there.  I mean, it'll be there all season.  Right?

This is where I usually say "Probably not."  But really, I'm feeling all the food in my stomach right now.

This Is An Appreciation Blog Post

I'm getting fat off the food, some of which I am surprised I had to pay for.  But not only are there worse ways to spend a waking day on this Earth than at a ballpark, I am having an easy time working, or "working," at the ballpark.  Right now, I have a perfect vantage point to watch a baseball Game (sure, the Twins are losing), and not only do I not have to pay for it, I'm getting paid for it.

Just breathe.  And be grateful.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -2).  Even though my anger towards this program for not taking that final step and winning championships -- and then compounding that by getting upset in seasons when they're ranked high and seeded high in the tournament -- I still will watch Matches in-person during their non-conference season because they'll be playing great teams in conferences outside the Big Ten.  This past Week I saw them twice at Maturi Pavilion -- Sunday against Florida, then just last/Friday night vs. Oregon, hosting the B1G/Pac12 Challenge this weekend.

I don't mind picking nits with this team.  There were stretches in both tilts where the Gophers looked mortal and lost.  The way I see it, they had trouble defending against dinks, they sometimes didn't get their blocks up in time, and there were startling instances of mis- and non-communication leading into easy points for the Gators and the Ducks.  Both opponents were able to roll into winning a Set in which the U. played awful, moreso (I think, although it could be recency bias) in the middle of their Match against Oregon than in the middle of their Match against Florida.  Still, they woke up in time to close out four-Set Wins in both.  But despite being ranked third in the country right now (behind only Texas, who they lost to, and Nebraska), I don't think championship-winning clubs let themselves be susceptible to bad lulls like I saw the Gophers allow themselves to get stuck in.

They finish off the challenge tonight/Saturday night when they play Stanford.  They then finish non-con play by hosting their annual Diet Coke Classic, which consists only of the Gophers, Pepperdine and Washington St.  They will host the Waves Thursday evening.

(Aside: I love women's college volleyball, but I love being a neutral even more.  So I salivate when I see two teams, neither of which I am emotionally invested in, come to town and play.  [That's why I love college tournaments so much.]  Before the Gopher-Duck Match, the other two clubs in this Challenge, storied programs Penn St. and Stanford, faced off.  The Match began at 5, and unfortunately work precluded me from getting there when it started, otherwise I so would have been there.  Moreover, rain was forecast last/Friday evening.  I asked the U. if I could bring an umbrella into the Sports Pavilion; they said I could not.  And I didn't want to get wet, so if it was raining hard by the time I got to Dinkytown, I would have not gone.  But finally, after waiting in my parking spot till 5:30, I decided to head to the Pav.  Hey, I was already going to miss the very first Point.  I know I'm a completist, but if missing the very first Points of the Match was basically guaranteed, what's waiting a Set-and-a-half, which is what I eventually did?  The rain was steady on my way there, but it was light.  I think the worst of it blew through while I was at the Pavilion, and by the time I got out of there between 10:15 and 10:30, the rain was a tad more intense than it was when on my way to the U.

Anyway, I'm glad I went, because even though I got there in the middle of Set 2, a tight Set which Penn St. pulled out to go up 2-0, that turned into an excellent Match.  The Cardinal/Farm took Games 3 and 4, only for the Nittany Lions to take the last four Points of Set 5 -- the last of which was earned upon a Review by new Nittany Lions Head Coach Katie Schumacher-Cawley that proved Stanford hit the ball four times earlier in that Rally -- and the Match.  Sure, it delayed the Gopher Match by a half-hour.  But all those latecomers who got there assuming the Match would start at 7:30 as advertised instead were treated to a hell of a fifth Set.  Why didn't they come sooner?  Why didn't they get there at 5:05, when the Match started?  They then would've had something over me!

And that's why, for the Diet Coke Classic, I'm not really interested in seeing Minnesota play Pepperdine Thursday or Washington St. next Saturday.  But on Friday, the Waves and the Cougars play at Maturi.  [It's at 5 again, dammit, and I probably will be late again, but again, I don't mind.]  I just need to know if people can come watch that Match even though the hosts aren't playing.  I hope I can watch.  Right now, I'm in volleyball heaven.)

#-2: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -5).  This isn't the England women's team running the table in the Women's Euros over the summer, but after a stumble to begin their Year, the Gopher XI have ripped off three in a row, including Wins this screening Week at North Dakota Sunday and home versus Nebraska-Omaha Thursday.  I don't think those victories will do wonders for their RPI or whatever metric the NCAA uses to compare teams across conferences for inclusion into the Tournament; conference play will do that.  But hey, better to win than to lose.

One final non-conference Match, Sunday afternoon against Marquette at the ELR.  The U. start B1G play Friday at Nebraska.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  Saturday's huge clash at Allianz between the Loons and FC Dallas, third and fourth in the West, respectively, should have been a late-season dogfight.  Instead, it became a humiliating capitulation by MNUFC, losing 3-0 by the leapfrogging FCD.  And they scored all three Goals in a span of three Minutes (well, the first Goal was an Own Goal by Michael Boxall; I wonder if the bad vibes just cascaded into a dream-crushing flood at that point).

I might have followed many people who reportedly walked out of the stadium after that third Goal, cursing under my breath at how this side suddenly sucks.  But I wasn't there.  No, I wanted to spend some time with my parents before they left town, and I had my alma mater's college football season-opener I needed to go to.  So I gave my ticket to my friend.  After the Match he texted me saying he enjoyed it, but of course the outcome of the Game could have been different.  I responded by apologizing for giving him that dog's breakfast of a Match.

They made hay on an easy part of their schedule.  But now they'll end the regular season (with five Matches left) on a hard part, and they have dropped 3-0 decisions in back-to-back Matches since Bakaye Dibassy was lost for the Year.  They were flying high not too long ago, but they haven't clinched shit just yet.  And they are sliding down the Western Conference; Nashville SC just passed them for fourth.  They're still in decent position to nail down a postseason birth -- they're five Points ahead of the Los Angeles Galaxy -- but they have lost the right to host a First Round Match.

Worse than that, the Loons play two Matches this Week: Tonight/Saturday night in Portland, then a rare (if not first-of-its-kind) Tuesday contest vs. Laugh-See.  Oh, and for that Timbers Match, they might be without Emmanuel Reynoso because of injury.  And double-oh, Franco Fragapane is missing the next two Matches -- one for getting a Yellow Card against FCD in the 20th Minute and thus accumulating enough Yellow Cards over the course of the season to sit him down for a Match, and one for his stupid Red Card against FCD in the 69th that'll keep him out for, well, another Match.

This team went from down in the dumps to the penthouse suite, and now they're tumbling back down to the basement, for fuck's sake.

#-4: Twins (Last Week: -4).  Nevertheless, United FC at least are still in prime position for the postseason.  The same can't be said about the Twinks, and it's been a long time since I can remember a Twins ballclub free-falling like this in the second half of a baseball season.

However, if you're a Minnesota Twins fatalist, you weren't surprised by the team's 2-5 Week, which featured three teams that simply don't like the Twins.  We have to fucking start with the White Sox sweeping three Games from the Twinks at Comiskey.  In that Saturday Game, Dylan Cease was phenomenal, going the distance, striking out 7, and almost throwing a No-Hitter.  "Unfortunately," Luis Arraez, the league leader in Batting Average, hit one into the outfield with two gone in the bottom of the Ninth, thus breaking up the No-Hit bid.  But the Twinks still lost that one, 13-0.

And of course that shit-ass showing against a Division rival would be followed up with a four-Game road series vs. the fuckin' Yankees.  And they lost three-of-four, and they would've lost that fourth and last one if Isiah Kiner-Falefa (who the Twinks got from The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0 and then promptly swung him to the Yanks) didn't ground out to end the Game with the bases loaded.  Death, taxes, and the Yankees making the Twinks their bitch again.  Like goddamn clockwork.

And then the Twinks follow that up with a series versus the team they're now chasing in the A. L. Central, the Cleveland Guardians.  That series started late last/Friday night because rain pushed back First Pitch by about 76 Minutes.  Dylan Bundy got shook down for four Runs in the top of the First and allowed seven Guardian Runs before being yanked in the top of the Fifth.  Thank Buddha this is The Worst Division In The Majors because Minnesota made an unheralded comeback ... only to fall short, 7-6.

That Loss, combined with a Win by the White Sox in Oakland, means that the Twinks, as stubbornly as they now fill the role of stalking horse behind Cleveland, currently sit 2 1/2 Games back ... but in third place behind the White Sox.  Minnesota is dead in the water as far as getting a Wild Card goes, so that franchise's only path to the postseason lies in staying on top of the dung heap that is this Division.  But do they have the talent and the fortitude to do it?

After finishing the Cleveland series this weekend, they host Kansas City for three beginning Tuesday, then travel to The Land and face the Guardians in a four-Day, five-Game wraparound series starting on Friday.  Things could go so bad for this squad that they might be out of the Division race this time next Week.