Saturday, September 10, 2022

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -2).  Even though my anger towards this program for not taking that final step and winning championships -- and then compounding that by getting upset in seasons when they're ranked high and seeded high in the tournament -- I still will watch Matches in-person during their non-conference season because they'll be playing great teams in conferences outside the Big Ten.  This past Week I saw them twice at Maturi Pavilion -- Sunday against Florida, then just last/Friday night vs. Oregon, hosting the B1G/Pac12 Challenge this weekend.

I don't mind picking nits with this team.  There were stretches in both tilts where the Gophers looked mortal and lost.  The way I see it, they had trouble defending against dinks, they sometimes didn't get their blocks up in time, and there were startling instances of mis- and non-communication leading into easy points for the Gators and the Ducks.  Both opponents were able to roll into winning a Set in which the U. played awful, moreso (I think, although it could be recency bias) in the middle of their Match against Oregon than in the middle of their Match against Florida.  Still, they woke up in time to close out four-Set Wins in both.  But despite being ranked third in the country right now (behind only Texas, who they lost to, and Nebraska), I don't think championship-winning clubs let themselves be susceptible to bad lulls like I saw the Gophers allow themselves to get stuck in.

They finish off the challenge tonight/Saturday night when they play Stanford.  They then finish non-con play by hosting their annual Diet Coke Classic, which consists only of the Gophers, Pepperdine and Washington St.  They will host the Waves Thursday evening.

(Aside: I love women's college volleyball, but I love being a neutral even more.  So I salivate when I see two teams, neither of which I am emotionally invested in, come to town and play.  [That's why I love college tournaments so much.]  Before the Gopher-Duck Match, the other two clubs in this Challenge, storied programs Penn St. and Stanford, faced off.  The Match began at 5, and unfortunately work precluded me from getting there when it started, otherwise I so would have been there.  Moreover, rain was forecast last/Friday evening.  I asked the U. if I could bring an umbrella into the Sports Pavilion; they said I could not.  And I didn't want to get wet, so if it was raining hard by the time I got to Dinkytown, I would have not gone.  But finally, after waiting in my parking spot till 5:30, I decided to head to the Pav.  Hey, I was already going to miss the very first Point.  I know I'm a completist, but if missing the very first Points of the Match was basically guaranteed, what's waiting a Set-and-a-half, which is what I eventually did?  The rain was steady on my way there, but it was light.  I think the worst of it blew through while I was at the Pavilion, and by the time I got out of there between 10:15 and 10:30, the rain was a tad more intense than it was when on my way to the U.

Anyway, I'm glad I went, because even though I got there in the middle of Set 2, a tight Set which Penn St. pulled out to go up 2-0, that turned into an excellent Match.  The Cardinal/Farm took Games 3 and 4, only for the Nittany Lions to take the last four Points of Set 5 -- the last of which was earned upon a Review by new Nittany Lions Head Coach Katie Schumacher-Cawley that proved Stanford hit the ball four times earlier in that Rally -- and the Match.  Sure, it delayed the Gopher Match by a half-hour.  But all those latecomers who got there assuming the Match would start at 7:30 as advertised instead were treated to a hell of a fifth Set.  Why didn't they come sooner?  Why didn't they get there at 5:05, when the Match started?  They then would've had something over me!

And that's why, for the Diet Coke Classic, I'm not really interested in seeing Minnesota play Pepperdine Thursday or Washington St. next Saturday.  But on Friday, the Waves and the Cougars play at Maturi.  [It's at 5 again, dammit, and I probably will be late again, but again, I don't mind.]  I just need to know if people can come watch that Match even though the hosts aren't playing.  I hope I can watch.  Right now, I'm in volleyball heaven.)

#-2: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -5).  This isn't the England women's team running the table in the Women's Euros over the summer, but after a stumble to begin their Year, the Gopher XI have ripped off three in a row, including Wins this screening Week at North Dakota Sunday and home versus Nebraska-Omaha Thursday.  I don't think those victories will do wonders for their RPI or whatever metric the NCAA uses to compare teams across conferences for inclusion into the Tournament; conference play will do that.  But hey, better to win than to lose.

One final non-conference Match, Sunday afternoon against Marquette at the ELR.  The U. start B1G play Friday at Nebraska.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -3).  Saturday's huge clash at Allianz between the Loons and FC Dallas, third and fourth in the West, respectively, should have been a late-season dogfight.  Instead, it became a humiliating capitulation by MNUFC, losing 3-0 by the leapfrogging FCD.  And they scored all three Goals in a span of three Minutes (well, the first Goal was an Own Goal by Michael Boxall; I wonder if the bad vibes just cascaded into a dream-crushing flood at that point).

I might have followed many people who reportedly walked out of the stadium after that third Goal, cursing under my breath at how this side suddenly sucks.  But I wasn't there.  No, I wanted to spend some time with my parents before they left town, and I had my alma mater's college football season-opener I needed to go to.  So I gave my ticket to my friend.  After the Match he texted me saying he enjoyed it, but of course the outcome of the Game could have been different.  I responded by apologizing for giving him that dog's breakfast of a Match.

They made hay on an easy part of their schedule.  But now they'll end the regular season (with five Matches left) on a hard part, and they have dropped 3-0 decisions in back-to-back Matches since Bakaye Dibassy was lost for the Year.  They were flying high not too long ago, but they haven't clinched shit just yet.  And they are sliding down the Western Conference; Nashville SC just passed them for fourth.  They're still in decent position to nail down a postseason birth -- they're five Points ahead of the Los Angeles Galaxy -- but they have lost the right to host a First Round Match.

Worse than that, the Loons play two Matches this Week: Tonight/Saturday night in Portland, then a rare (if not first-of-its-kind) Tuesday contest vs. Laugh-See.  Oh, and for that Timbers Match, they might be without Emmanuel Reynoso because of injury.  And double-oh, Franco Fragapane is missing the next two Matches -- one for getting a Yellow Card against FCD in the 20th Minute and thus accumulating enough Yellow Cards over the course of the season to sit him down for a Match, and one for his stupid Red Card against FCD in the 69th that'll keep him out for, well, another Match.

This team went from down in the dumps to the penthouse suite, and now they're tumbling back down to the basement, for fuck's sake.

#-4: Twins (Last Week: -4).  Nevertheless, United FC at least are still in prime position for the postseason.  The same can't be said about the Twinks, and it's been a long time since I can remember a Twins ballclub free-falling like this in the second half of a baseball season.

However, if you're a Minnesota Twins fatalist, you weren't surprised by the team's 2-5 Week, which featured three teams that simply don't like the Twins.  We have to fucking start with the White Sox sweeping three Games from the Twinks at Comiskey.  In that Saturday Game, Dylan Cease was phenomenal, going the distance, striking out 7, and almost throwing a No-Hitter.  "Unfortunately," Luis Arraez, the league leader in Batting Average, hit one into the outfield with two gone in the bottom of the Ninth, thus breaking up the No-Hit bid.  But the Twinks still lost that one, 13-0.

And of course that shit-ass showing against a Division rival would be followed up with a four-Game road series vs. the fuckin' Yankees.  And they lost three-of-four, and they would've lost that fourth and last one if Isiah Kiner-Falefa (who the Twinks got from The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0 and then promptly swung him to the Yanks) didn't ground out to end the Game with the bases loaded.  Death, taxes, and the Yankees making the Twinks their bitch again.  Like goddamn clockwork.

And then the Twinks follow that up with a series versus the team they're now chasing in the A. L. Central, the Cleveland Guardians.  That series started late last/Friday night because rain pushed back First Pitch by about 76 Minutes.  Dylan Bundy got shook down for four Runs in the top of the First and allowed seven Guardian Runs before being yanked in the top of the Fifth.  Thank Buddha this is The Worst Division In The Majors because Minnesota made an unheralded comeback ... only to fall short, 7-6.

That Loss, combined with a Win by the White Sox in Oakland, means that the Twinks, as stubbornly as they now fill the role of stalking horse behind Cleveland, currently sit 2 1/2 Games back ... but in third place behind the White Sox.  Minnesota is dead in the water as far as getting a Wild Card goes, so that franchise's only path to the postseason lies in staying on top of the dung heap that is this Division.  But do they have the talent and the fortitude to do it?

After finishing the Cleveland series this weekend, they host Kansas City for three beginning Tuesday, then travel to The Land and face the Guardians in a four-Day, five-Game wraparound series starting on Friday.  Things could go so bad for this squad that they might be out of the Division race this time next Week.

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