Just to let y'all know, the place I have often referred to in this blog as My Favorite Coffeeshop (Late-Night Division) was Uncommon Grounds. "Was" because Friday likely was the last night I would ever step in there again.
Had a huge dinner with the fam, but because My Fucking Father woke me up 15 minutes before I planned to (covered that in my previous blog post) and then I felt irritated by my parents while helping for said dinner, I decided I needed to take off and get some coffee and Internet time by myself on a swingin' Friday night.
Uncommon Grounds -- again, the My Favorite Coffeeshop I've alluded to so many times because I didn't want to a) give it any illicit publicity and b) be bothered when I'm there -- is the place I went to because they're open until 1 on weekends. Urban Bean closes way too early; I've been there only twice. Bob's Java Hut closes at midnight and caters to bikers, which scares me. Common Roots is a quasi-restaurant, and the one time I went there I had to hunt for a good 15 minutes for a plug for my laptop. (Plus, they serve leftist food, and even though I'm generally a liberal, leftist food sucks.) Spyhouse also closes at midnight and -- this will be considered blasphemy by Twin Cities coffee cognoscenti -- they have the rudest barista bitches in the area. Fuck them.
I seem to be saying that Uncommon Grounds is the least of evils, and that's not the image I want to impart. Their drinks are on the expensive side, sure, but at least they're good. I like the atmosphere; the coffeeshop is a remodeled house. Not too many people go there, so I often can just camp out in the upper floor and enjoy surfing in peace. And the baristas there are all women, and they're very pretty, I must say.
However, one thing that has happened in recent years, and has gained steam this summer, is closing the upper floor. Not too many people want to enjoy a cup of coffee during the summer, the baristas say, and it cuts costs to not need to air-condition the second floor. I understand; sometimes I've walked out, sometimes I've been lucky enough to find a table with a socket next to it and do my business downstairs.
This changed for good tonight. I was minding my own business when the owner came up to me and told me, "You can't use the computer here. Starting next week we are banning computers, at least on the first floor."
What-what-what??? Why? I had never thought it was a problem. But he insinuated that singles with computers -- pathetic loners like me -- take up too much space. Apparently laptops are allowed upstairs ... but only in groups. I haven't gone to UG with someone since at least 2000, so I can't go upstairs, and since there's nothing else a pathetic loner like me can do at a coffeehouse besides lug his computer, I am banned from enjoying a cup of joe on the ground floor. Which means I'm fucking banned.
The owner did say that I was allowed to use my computer for the Internet now. One problem: The modem didn't work this night. I was told by one of the cute baristas before being addressed by the owner that it was on the blink. It is usually reliable but that has happened on occasion; now I kind of think the modem malfunction was deliberate. And then, after "talking" with the owner (who always wears a ballcap for some reason) I saw the "No Computers Allowed" sign taped to the cash register. It might have been there when I came in and I just ignored it. But I took that as a sign that, really, I and my laptop are no longer wanted here. I saw the sign after deciding to leave (I wanted to pour my coffee into a to-go cup); that sign confirmed I made the right decision.
So it's now Caffetto for me, the place I discovered on Vita.mn several months ago and find to be a funky place with left-of-center values. This place is also open until 1, they just haven't banned singles with laps, at least not yet. Plus, their drinks are a bit less expensive. The big problem will be trying to find parking. But I will be undaunted in trying to find a spot for a cheap way to spend a weekend night.
And fuck Uncommon Grounds. I thought you were my safe harbor, but if you don't want me, I have no choice but to move on. It's been real.
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