How's About Some More Toxic Masculinity?

Yesterday morning I ran in to get coffee.  There is special parking for people like me who are just running in to get coffee.  There was a car next to me, in the other spot for such a situation.  Something I noticed.

I walk in.  There's a guy, some White douche in a hoodie.  Someone I noticed.  I grab my things and go.

I didn't notice that, as I was getting in to my car, this hoodie dude was right behind me, and he was getting into the car next to me.  Well, fuck, it was now a race.  And I lost because while I was throwing my mask off to the side, it caught on the velcro of my glove.  So I had to rip it away from it, and then I had to insert my key into the ignition.  By then it was too late; this suave White douche was already backing out when I started the minivan.  He was sneering.  I noticed as I was gazing at him in bitter anger that he was driving a Mercedes-Benz.  So he got a fancy car, probably has no-key ignition, and he probably saw as he was walking to his door the rusting wheel well of my minivan and thought he was better than me.  Oh, White douche motherfucker, if you're so goddamn rich, why in the fuck are you in the north metro?

I had half a mind to back out faster than he.  I mean, if we run into each other, what do I care?  There may be scratches on the minivan, but there are already scratches!  This M-B Motherfucker, on the other hand, well, he'd have a fucking meltdown because I ruined his poor baby!  But he might also have a gun, too, so I had to let him go, goddammit.

But here's where the dick-measuring we were doing gets to be really toxic.  The parking spaces we were in are kind of in a busy alley, and it's close to this busy intersection where a lot of cars go through to the other shops around this relatively busy business district.  (White M-B douche just went off to the gas station about 75 yards away.)  In fact, you just have to make a quick right, then a quick left, then turn your car and you'd reach this parking space I'm in.  It's basically a chicane to where this prick and I parked.

It just so happened that while White M-B hoodie douche was backing out, there was a car that quickly slalomed to the opening of this alley.  She, of course, had to stop.  But this dumbass ... man, I don't know what he was doing, maybe he went out of his way to beat me out of the parking alley and got afraid of me.  Anyway, this car had to stop on this quick street while he backed out ... not toward the alley so he could drive forward through this chicane and through the intersection to the gas station.  No, he backed out in front of this car and would up on this quick street himself.  He basically did a 180 out of the parking spot, in front of this poor driver, and finally through the intersection.  It was as half-ass a backout as I've ever seen, and yet it seems on-brand with a White douchebag who'd wear a hooded sweatshirt and shorts on December 1 and drive a Mercedes-Benz in an area of the Twin Cities where people drive either pick-up trucks or Japanese coupes.

So what did I do?  Use my head and wait?  Fuck no!  I follow this dumbfuck with almost-as-bad driving even though I had already "lost" the race out of parking.  I back out so I am pointed out of the parking alley, like a smart guy, even though I made a car that was driving through the alley wait for me and my fat minivan ass.  But I don't back out far enough to that I can just ease my way onto this quick street and then to the intersection.  No, I stopped so that, once I went from reverse to drive, I had to spin my steering wheel all the way from one side to the other to kink my car in the right direction ... and, by the way, to avoid the driver who was still waiting on this quick street, and got so frustrated that she spun her wheel to the right just to get around me while I was trying to get past her.  My fucking God, I swear I didn't drive as shittily as White M-B prick, but because my manhood was attacked, I didn't really act all that well, either.  And I contributed to this poor driver having almost as bad a morning as I did because she had to deal with back-to-back drive-off fuck-ups.

First a temper-filled confrontation with some security guard, then I lose an out-of-nowhere competition from this rich asshole who thinks he's above me ... this has been a bad back-to-back one-two punch of toxic displays of masculinity, first by other people and then by me in reaction.  I hope to God this doesn't happen this morning.