#0: Vikings (Last Week: -1). In what many consider the team's most complete victory of the season, 35-9 over Seattle. It wasn't a full-throttle throttling from whistle to gun, nor was it like their wins over Cleveland and Detroit where they were slow coming out of the gate, made adjustments at halftime and finally pulled away in the second half. Somehow, through all the penalties and runs up the middle for little-to-no gain, they were able to pour it on the Seahawks in the second quarter. Favre, who threw touchdown passes to four different receivers, has yet to show signs of fatigue or recklessness. However, Sunday's game at home versus Chicago is Week 12, which statistics show is about the time he starts to fall apart.
#-1: Twins (Re-Entry!). They're here because Joe Mauer was named American League Most Valuable Player this week. He's only the second catcher since I was born (that's 33 years) to be AL MVP. For this, he will be handsomely rewarded with a long-term deal that'll pay him the moon -- and as well he should. The question becomes: Who will be sacrificed from the team in order to accomodate Mauer's new contract and fit under their budget guidelines? The real question should be: At what point does the greatest ambassador this franchise has ever known get undermined by the diminishing returns of a player who catches? The real follow-up question then should be: Can they convince Mauer to stop short of that point in the contract, or can the Twins let go of Mauer before they reach it?
#-2: Gopher men's basketball (Re-Entry!). Some people have criticized Tubby Smith's non-conference schedule as soft. It is, and it should thus be ridiculed. But at least they're winning. I neglected to put them in last week's WMNSS because I plain forgot, so I'll say that the Gophs had a 3-0 last two weeks ... even if the margins of victory were 37, 40 and 25. The continued suspensions of Royce White and Trevor Mbakwe have so far not been an obstacle. Having what is considered the deepest bench in the Big 10 helps. Of course, that doesn't mean they're the most talented -- think about that to Purdue, Michigan St., and Michigan. This week they face the toughest part of their non-con schedule by participating in a Thanksgiving weekend tournament, the 76 Classic. (Is this is a classic? Did it start in 1976? No; according to wikipedia, the 76 Classic started in 2007. So shouldn't it be called the 07 Classic? The 76 stands for the 76 gas station company. Pssh.) Anyway, they face Butler, number 12 in the AP poll this week, in the quarterfinals. If they're good enough to beat the Bulldogs, UCLA looms next.
#-3: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -3). A home sweep of Bemidji St. and they're still #2 in the poll (behind Mercyhurst -- where's Mercyhurst?). Congrats to Megan Bozek for being WCHA Rookie Of The Week. I put this team below the men's basketball team because 1) the women's hockey team has disappointed me before, and 2) they have taken a couple of dings while the men's cagers, even though it's early, hasn't even faced its conference schedule yet, so you can say there's hope. A huge test this week -- they host third-ranked Clarkson this weekend.
#-4: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -2). I'm dreading -- dreading -- the moment this team loses to someone seeded below them. Getting their asses kicked at Michigan is understandable; it was Senior Day and the Wolverine are ranked 12th (although they passed the Gophs this week based in part on the win). Needing to come back from a two-set deficit at unranked Michigan St. is much more disconcerting. A comeback like that might show resiliency and the ability to adjust. I say that a team that has aspirations -- now dead -- that they could reach the Final Four shouldn't be fucking doing that at all. This team will be upset early for the second year in a row; I guarantee it. Naturally, I say the Gophs will lose at home to Illinois for Senior Night Saturday night; it'd be a perfect way to completely burn off any hope that this team can contend for a title. Oh, and they also host Northwestern Friday.
#-5: Gopher women's basketball (Re-Entry!). I also neglected to put this team in the last week's survey -- which would have accounted for their first loss of the year, at Utah on the 17th. Their schedule is somewhat of a turkey too -- home wins against Lamar, UI-Chicago, Colorado and North Dakota St. -- but it's a touch stronger than their Y-chromosome counterparts. It's not bad up here weather-wise in these parts, but I'm still kind of jealous this team has been invited to play in the Bahamas this Thanksgiving Weekend; they face TCU Friday morning in the Junkanoo(?) Jam; the winner of that game faces the winner of the Kansas-Xavier game for the championship Saturday.
#-6: Wild (Last Week: -6). Nothing of the suckitude of some past weeks, but they had to come back from deficits both games this week. They were able to win at home against the Islanders, but they pudded out in a shootout loss to Boston. I saw that Bruin loss Wednesday night; still not impressed. And I don't quite understand trading Benoit Pouliot to Montreal for this Left Winger named Guillaume Latendresse. Wild Coach Todd Richards says he wants the team to get faster. People say Latendresse isn't fast, and who says Pouliot isn't? He is one of a huge list of first-round draft failures under former General Manager Doug Risebrough, but I'm not actually certain he was given a chance to play to his full potential. However, I do like the fact that new GM Chuck Fletcher doesn't mind trading, something Risebrough approached as if it had the swine flu. This week: a home-and-home Black Friday and Saturday against the Bastard Quebec Nordiques, then hosting Nashville Wednesday.
#-7: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -5). Seriously, what in the hell is going on here? I don't care if an overtime and a bad bounce cost them two one-goal games to hated UMD. You're playing at home. You're Minnesota. You shouldn't be 5-7-1. Lake Superior St. can be 5-7-1. Alaska-Anchorage would kill to be 5-7-1. The Gophs don't do this. They. Just. Don't. Fucking. Do. This. Ugh, I don't know what else to say. They're in the state of Michigan to face the Michigan and Michigan St. for the College Hockey Showcase.
#-8: Gopher football (Last Week: -4). Guess this was better than the 55-0 shit-kicking they were given by Iowa last year. Still, they haven't scored in two games against the Hawkeyes. 12-0? Numerically they had a chance to win this, but not having watched one second of this game I'm going to guess the offense was not going to score at all, despite the Gophs' defense doing everything it can to keep this team in the game. Great, this means a meaningless trip to Arizona again. Or Detroit. By the way, congratulations to Eric Decker for making First Team All-Big Ten. But the fact that he can be a first-teamer when he missed the last four games -- that's one-third of the season -- is more proof these awards are pure crap. Well, at least they're not the ...
#-9: Timberwolves (Last Week: -7). Just like the Gopher men's hockey team, I don't know what to say. Just look at the Woofie Dogs' schedule and at the long column of "L"'s at the bottom of the page. 0-3 for the week, 14 losses in a row, and if they continue that this week against games tomorrow versus Phoenix, Sunday at Denver, and Wednesday at home against Memphis, they will set a new record for most consecutive losses in franchise history. I'll be there to see the carnage against the Suns tomorrow because a friend of mine has free tickets.
No comments:
Post a Comment