This Is Not Working

So, my plan for fighting off this cold that seems to come whenever the weather turns colder is to crank up the heat and sleep in for as long as my body needs it in order to fight this off for good.  (Medication might help; I bought and took some NyQuil before bed.)  I finally made it through my duties for last night, and I thought a long rest coupled with an easy Sunday would eliminate this cold and fully acclimate me for winter.

I think I went to bed around 1:30 or 2.  Got up at 11:30.  And my nose is still stuffy as hell, I'm still blowing out snot into my tissues, I'm coughing into conniption fits and I'm still sort of cold.

Frankly, I don't know what else to do.

The Fuck You Say To Me, Two-Face?

Oh.  My.  God.  I cannot believe what happened yesterday/Friday.  I'm still aghast by this blindside, and I don't know how the fuck to deal with it.

So I'm at work, right?  And I had this difficult folder to look through.  There were, like, 15 problems with it, and for some goddamn reason they weren't in the order that they were on the computer.  And, OK, maybe I was spacing out there for a little bit, but I was listening to Stephanie Miller talk about the Kavanaugh hearings and I was riveted.  American democracy is at stake!

So I finally got done with that beast of a folder and put it aside.  This woman who sits next to me for yesterday, someone who was really nice and even sweet to me as I've gone through training, a woman who brought carrot cake for all of us to eat last week and was fucking delicious ... this woman, out of the blue, who took some of the folders that were piling up behind this folder I had to go through, said, "That took you 15 minutes."

Excuse me?  EXCUSE ME?!?!?!?!  Are you critiquing my work?  Why the fuck are you criticizing me?  First of all, I had problems with the fucking batch, OK?  And second of all: Why the hell are you timing my work when you have your own shit you need to deal with?  You know, I don't want to say this, but I have to defend myself: Fuck you, and mind your own goddamn business.

I was shellshocked at what she said, totally gobsmacked.  And once I finally got up the courage to ask her -- really, to confront her -- by what exactly she meant by that snide, passive-aggressive, Minnesotan comment, she did something that really pisses me off: She gave me the silent treatment.  She goddamn well knew that I was in her peripheral vision and demanded her attention, but nope, she she just kept peck-peck-pecking, probably to make a better example for me, something to strive for.

I don't know where to begin, and since I'm kind of sick and delirious, maybe I shouldn't elaborate.  But this I will say this: Even though I discussed this with my friend I met for dinner last (Friday) night, I think I got her tone loud and clear.  I really, really resent being ignored after she insulted me so snidely.  I hate that she was living it up with the other co-worker but was absolutely rude to me.  I thanked her for picking up my stuff, but she didn't reply, not even a "You're welcome."  Seriously, what the fuck is a matter with you?  And the silent treatment ... oh, there are ways I can get your goddamn attention if you fuck with me like this.  Oh, and I am so angry by how she treated me.

Like I said before, this is what I was afraid of when I signed up for a full-time job: The assholes you meet at work or the same assholes you will say every fucking day for the rest of your life.  What the hell do you do then?

I'm still trying to work this out, OK?  I don't need to be judged, especially by someone who is in no position to judge me.  Go fuck yourself.

Obviously I'm dead to her.  So fuck it, she's dead to me.  I'm not going to stand for this juvenile bullshit.  This ain't junior high school, scurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Just When I Thought Mother Was Half A World Away

So there's something fucked up with one of their real estate properties.  I just got off the phone with one of the management team in Vegas, and believe me, it's fucked-up.  I was supposed to talk to Mother, too, after she texted me (presumably in a panic) this morning while I was at work.  But when I called her I got no answer.

I imagine her yelling at me just for trying to step into something and helping.  Bitch is like that.  You know, I just spoke to my therapist about how it feels so liberating to have my parents be half a world away where they can't contact me constantly about bullshit.  But, as important as this thing is, I'll quickly tire of her ability to reach out through the Internet and yell at me talk again, sigh.

Try her again tonight.  Have dinner with a friend in St. Paul now.

I'm Actually Supposed To Like The Fall ...

... but in the past few days I've come down with what seems to be a cold.  Either I got it from someone at work or from walking around the U. trying (and failing; maybe I'll talk about this in the WMNSS Monday) to get into the volleyball match Wednesday night.  Regardless, yesterday I started hacking up spit and feeling my nose get all stuffy.  It's as if my sinuses are churning out snot like it's working overtime.

It is either a cold or, somehow, it's gotten so dry that my sinuses cannot adjust.  Either way, it's sort of strange to be this cold, sick and miserable as we fully transition into fall, which I have repeatedly said is My Favorite Season.  If autumn is my favorite season, I should not be this sick and feel this bad.  Maybe I need to reevaluate. 

Just In Case The Job Goes South

At the end of every day, I go through at least 65 e-mails.  Most of them are from job want ads.  I signed up to so many of these while I was inbetween jobs, casting about like a thrashing fish on dry land, trying to land my next temp job.

So, since I have a full-time job, I should start unsubscribing to them, right?  I mean, I don't need them, and if I unsubscribe it will greatly cut down on the now-junk e-mails I have to go through.

So why don't I?  Inertia and ... well, let's face it: If the job goes south, and I either quit or get fired, I'll need these job postings again.  At work yesterday I was given an e-mail warning me about my lack of production.  My supervisor thought it was because I was on my software too long (it times my work while I'm in it), but it may be because I'm too slow.  I mean, I'm two-thirds through my "probation" period.  If I'm not fast enough by now. ...

Maybe I'll compromise and just unsubscribe to, like, half of them.

Awkward, Scary Protest

Monday I was at the re-opening of a library in town.  It had been closed for over a year for renovations.  I liked the place a lot: It was big, it has a coffeeshop (or at least it had), and the computers are always new and fast.  I would go out of my way to surf there, and I have.

There was a speech before the official ribbon-cutting that heralded the "official" opening of the library that evening, even though I think you could've walked around way before then, if all the people hanging out with their laptops after the speech was over were any indication.

But back to the grand opening speech.  It was meant to be a short one, and it was going apace, with one speaker handing off to another.  But just as that handoff took place, one where a county commissioner was going to speak, a man in a wheelchair confronted her with a question.  About what I'm not quite sure.  But he asked about the number of employees at the library who are in chairs.  After some back-and-forth, he accused her of, I think, workplace discrimination against those who are disabled.  And he got extremely angry; he ended his diatribe by spinning around and telling the crowd about how things aren't quite as they seem behind "the glass," ostensibly meaning what happens in the business end of the library.  He was done; he may have stormed out, I don't know.

Look -- nominally I agree with someone who, after the speeches were done, shrugged and said, "Free speech."  And maybe there is something to what he said.  But I've got to be selfish here and admit that after his stunt/protest, I looked down and felt extremely ... embarrassed.  Not for him, but for myself.  While protests are supposed to be effective when they are not convenient for people seen as privileged, all I could think about was how that guy ruined the moment.  I felt so ... awkward ... no, scared that I just stayed in place while everyone walked out to see the ribbon-cutting.

This shows me that, as much as I like to argue, I hate confrontation, and I will do most anything to avoid it. 

Addendum To: That One "Friend" Who Stresses Me The Fuck Out

He's still going at it.  Well, we're still going at it.  Back and forth over our team.  There's been another game since then and we're still not letting it go.  I don't like arguments; I try to avoid them, sometimes at all costs.  But I also want -- well, more like demand -- to be right.  That sort of is a conflict.

Meanwhile, what does it say about him when he refuses to drop an argument after more than a week?  That has to be terribly exhausting if you're, say, his partner.  Then again, I'm doing it to.  But hey, I know I'm not partner material.

Maybe I'll get onto Facebook later today and see that he's finally dropped the subject.  Or, maybe not.

Worst Fuck I've Ever Had

So I ring up ****y yesterday/Sunday because I want to fuck her because I was given a condom at Glam Doll a few weeks ago and I considered it a sign that I should fuck her, plus I wanted to give her money because she asked me for some when she was short on rent.  So we set our session for early this afternoon.

But first there was a miscom over time and money; the $120 I gave her was for an hour, even though she did not specify.  And then she was just there like a dead fish while I think I penetrated her.  And then, when I came (via HJ, not FS), she told me to get out, 30 minutes after we began.  And not even a goodbye kiss.

Hey, either you win or you learn.  I consider it to be a learning experience.  If I fuck ****y again, it'll be a long time from now, hopefully.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

Positive Numbers: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -3).  Wednesday night the U. volleyballers were facing Penn St. at Maturi.  I wanted to go, but there was a possibility of such a deluge of rain that I contacted them to see what their policy was on bringing umbrellas.  The kid on the other end of the line said that they are not allowed in the Pavilion, but I would be allowed to leave them at the doors to pick up at the end of the night.  If there was a storm after the match, I imagined that people leaving the game before me would see it and steal the nearest umbrella left in the lobby.  And I have only one umbrella, so screw that, I just won't go.

I instead went to the Xcel Energy Center to see the United States Prospect game.  I brought my umbrella with me; if I was told I could not bring them in and that I could leave them unattended somewhere, I instead would have walked back out and got back on the light rail back to where I parked.  I like sports, but I need my umbrella.  Anyway, the security guard didn't tell me I couldn't bring it in.  She actually escorted me to Guest Services where I could check it in, like a coat check.  See, if I could get service like that for a sporting event, I could see myself going to more events, sporting or otherwise, there.  I wouldn't go, "Yeah, I want to see Parquet Courts at the X, but it's going to be raining and I don't want to walk in the rain all the way to the light rail."  So long as there is a place where I could put my stuff and that place is attended to by someone, I'll go there!  So much better than leaving it in the lobby, U.!

But, turns out I missed a whale of a game.  That Wednesday night was the showdown with Penn St.  And even though the Nittany Lions were ranked fourth (while the Golden Gophers were ranked seventh), the U. spanked them, sweeping them 22-21-19.  God, it would have been glorious to be in the room when that happened.  But that would have meant leaving my umbrella at the lobby (and, by the way, I don't know whether or not I could have gotten in.  The last two seasons I had to buy my ticket to the Penn St. match from a scalper).  They also swept Saturday, taking out Maryland (did the Terps women's volleyball team share a flight with the football team?  That would make sense) 19-19-18.  That is a hell of a way to bounce back from two four-Set losses to two Pac-12 schools two weeks ago.  Heck, they might even trade places with Penn St.

This week they have a second consecutive Wednesday home contest vs. a formidable opponent; Wisconsin visits Minneapolis for the second time this year (the first being that Big Ten/ACC Challenge/dress rehearsal for the NCAA Championships).  The squad then begins a three-game roadtrip by playing in Bloomington against Indiana Saturday.

#0: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -4).  Not bad, not bad.  Tied Michigan St. at scoreless Thursday, then April Bockin scored the only Goal of their match vs. Michigan in Double Overtime (105') yesterday/Sunday afternoon.  While their NCAA Tournament hopes are still pretty bad, these players still have more of a chance to reach the postseason than the team below them in this survey, and that's why I put the U. soccer side above MNUFC.  Just to clear things up.

This weekend they come back to Robbie Stadium to face the East Coast schools (Maryland Thursday, Rutgers Sunday).

#-1: United FC (Last Week: -6).  Typical game for the Loons.  Typical win, too.  Defense was leaky, yet somehow they were able to deposit three Goals in the First Half (mostly thanks to Darwin Quintero -- he hasn't gone after anybody in The Media yet, so let's keep him!) and hold on to beat the Portland Timbers 3-2 Saturday, the XI's first win in eight Games and exactly two months.  (Aside: I'm surprised at how soccer teams usually play so much better at home than on the road.  I don't think the sport is so challenging that the place of venue influences the outcomes of matches to an extent reflected of MNUFC's recent play during their stint as vagabonds.)  This does not change how pissed I am at the stupid and petty trade of Christian Ramirez -- spend money on some fucking defense! -- or how I think Adrian Heath and Manny Lagos should both be fired.  But yeah, I responded to the calls of the first name with the last names of Romario Ibarra and Michael Boxall when they scored.

Oh, by the way, Angelo Rodriguez was a Second Half sub.  He ostensibly replaces Ramirez.  But we didn't need him, did we?  Eh, doesn't matter, MNUFC ain't makin' the playoffs, anyway.

This Saturday they host NYCFC.  I cannot make it because I have a game-watching party just a half-hour after that match theoretically ends, and I have to make it to the bar way before then.

#-2: Twins (Last Week: -5).  A 4-2 screening week, where they followed up a three-game road sweep of Detroitby losing all but the getaway game in Oakland.  The main news here is that Miguel Sano did not make it on this roadtrip because of ... some health issue, and it looks like with one week left to go, he'll just be shut down for the rest of the season.

I really have nothing else to say about these guys except that this is the last week of the regular season.  They will be at Target Field, hosting the Tigers for a trio beginning Tuesday and finishing with four games versus the White Sox (including a Doubleheader Friday due to a snow-out way back on April 14 -- wow, a game early in the regular season being made up at the end of the regular season ... how full circle of them!).

#-3: Gopher football (Last Week: -1).  OK, P. J. Fleck is in his second year at the helm at the U.  Last year was the mulligan.  No more mulligans.  And after charging out to a 3-0 record, going on the road to face Maryland, a school that, the day before, released findings that Terrapin officials had the chance to save Jordan McNair in the hour-plus from the time he showed symptoms of heat stroke to the time 911 was finally called, the Gophers shit their pants.  The Goofers were outrushed 315-94 on their way to a 42-13 castration early Saturday afternoon.  After one conference game, they sure as fuck look like frauds.  Oh, well; at least they have a bye before the Homecoming Game vs. Iowa on Oct. 6.

#-4: Vikings (Last Week: -2).  I ... I just ... I can't even.

I really don't fucking know where to begin with describing what is The Worst Regular-Season Loss In Franchise History.  (Yes, this replaces the 2003 season-ending loss against bottom-feeding Arizona, The "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Game.)  You shouldn't describe sporting events in betting terms, but apparently every sports entity now endorses gambling.  So I will start with the most-repeated fact from yesterday's horrible, horrific, unspeakable loss to the bad-as-shit (supposedly) Buffalo Bills: The ViQueens are the last team to be favored by at least 16 points to lose outright (Straight-Up in betting parlance) since Dallas lost to Washington in 1995.

But let's look at things a little closer.  The Cowboys beat Washington by a score of 24-17, so I wouldn't call it a blowout, like yesterday's 27-6 rout was.  (Seriously, I was there.  Even though things settled down in the second half, the Bills scored all their points before Halftime.)  So from a quick graphic on an ESPN story about this historic defeat, I looked at the 1973 Atlanta Falcons, a team that eventually went 9-5 and didn't make the playoffs.  According to ESPN Stats & Information (gambling sites online don't seem to have archival info that long ago), they closed as 17-point favorites against the St. Louis Cardinals, a squad that would finish 4-9-1 that year, in the penultimate game of that year.  Despite St. Louis on a four-game losing streak (and where they tied Denver before that losing streak began), they not only beat Atlanta, they destroyed the Falcons, 32-10.  Luckily for the Vikes, the Falcons were also destroyed at home, so the analogy still applies.  (One difference: While the Bills rolled up their points early in the game and the Vikings only scored their meager points late, the Falcons ended the First Quarter, 10-0; the Cardinals seemed to gain strength and poured it on from the Second Quarter on.)  That defeat pretty much knocked the Falcons out of the playoffs.  So even though yesterday's emasculation is mind-boggling, it is not unprecedented.  You could still make the argument that, given closing lines and margin of defeat, the Vikes' loss is worse, but you could only definitely say that this is The Worst (Weirdest?) Loss Of A Heavily-Favored NFL Team Since 1973.

Nevertheless this is unheard-of, let alone humiliating.  I was as sure of this game being a win for the Vikings as I have been for any game that club has played in my lifetime.  I had a friend who, during our game-watching event for our alma mater Friday, said that she and her friend planned on swooping in and getting a ticket on the cheap minutes before the game (they live close).  I wondered if other people would do the same thing, and if so, how popular (and thus pricey) those tickets would be.  I mean, how popular is an execution?  And it turns out there was an execution -- for the home team.

Like I said, I don't know where to begin.  All I know is that the problems boil down to three things: Offense (the Vikings attempted the fewest rushing attempts in team history since The Merger; oh, and those four goddamn Turnovers really hurt them), Defense (they lost to Josh Allen, a rookie ... A ROOKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), and Special Teams (just ... ugh).  And if you stretch their play back to last season, this is the second real clunker of a game they have played in their last four -- their first being, of course, last year's NFC Championship Game.  Advanced metrics said that the ViQueens are not as good as people have hyped them out to be, and because of that, I pegged these guys as 8-8.  Well, unfortunately, I bought into the hype and those people broke my heart.  I don't hate that team as much as I hate myself for ever allowing myself to believe in them.

And now they have to visit Los Angeles to play, on a short wee, the high-flying Rams, who are 3-0 and actually living up to the hype.  There is a possibility that this season, one where they seemingly were all-in, and this roster, seen by many rubes as one of the best outfits this organization has ever assembled, goes south on them extremely quickly.

#-Infinity: Timberwolves (Last Week: -7).  And yet ... and yet ... even though a loss to a up-till-then winless team whose Cornerback quit in the middle of last week's game should automatically give that team a #-Infinity, that is nothing compared to that goddamn shitshow that is currently going on at Mayo Clinic Square.  My goodness, I swear, if the NBA just swooped in and gave this team to Las Vegas, I would not be upset in the slightest.

So I had bad feelings about this meeting Jimmy Butler wanted to have Monday at Timberwolves Headquarters with Tom Thibodeau.  Well, that meeting actually took place Tuesday and was held in L.A.  Anyway, I don't know what was said or if anything was decided then, but Butler gave Thibodeau a warning that he would not re-sign with the Woofie Dogs after his contract is up at the end of the upcoming year and that he wanted a trade to either New York, Brooklyn or the Clippers.  And the construction Thibs had for this club, one that finally reached the postseason for the first time since 2004, came crashing down in an instant.

Or did it?  We're never going to know who has leaked what to the media, let alone the agendas of those leakers.  But despite Butler's announcement that he is walking away from this squad, Thibs still wants him to play for him in Minnesota.  This is what I finally see after thinking he was The Shit when he was hired last year: He is almost psychopathically loyal to people if he thinks they give him the best chance to win.  Thibodeau really thinks that what's best for the team is for a disgruntled, yearning Butler, a man who belittled and otherwise clashed with Karl-Anthony Towns and Andrew Wiggins, to play alongside Towns and Wiggins for one more year, one where the Golden State Warriors will probably win the NBA title again and where teams such as Houston and Utah could easily dispatch any overachieving chemistry mess like the Woofie Dogs in the First Round.  Seriously, Thibs, what the fuck?

Advanced metrics (or maybe common sense) dictates that if a player wants out, he should be traded ASAP.  The Woofs are never going to get fair value for Butler, but it makes sense to get the best trade possible instead of letting him walk away at the end of the NBA season for nothing.  That's why Owner Glen Taylor has personally did a cannonball into this dumpster fire.  When it appeared that Thibs and General Manager Scott Layden were not shopping Butler around, Taylor said during the NBA Board Of Governors Meeting over the weekend that if Thibodeau and Layden would not be open to Butler trade talks, front officials with interested teams can talk to him personally.  I am shocked, shocked I tell you, to see an owner get involved in roster transactions like Glen Taylor is doing right now.  Sure, Jerry Jones is a hands-on meddler owner, but Taylor is mostly a hands-off type of Owner.  (Besides, look at the Cowboys right now.)  And yet, keeping Jimmy Butler for what surely would be just one more season (and there is no guarantee that Butler will even show up for the year; he's skipping Media Day, which is today/Monday) is such a stupid fucking idea that I'm actually glad that the Owner is overstepping his boundaries and actively undermining his front office, because trading Butler quickly is the right thing to do.

Which brings up this question: Why hasn't Taylor fired Thibodeau yet?

And then this bombshell dropped Saturday night: KAT received what is known as a super-max deal, a contract which will pay out $190 million over five years.  We can talk about whether or not this contract makes sense another time: Towns is the best player this organization has had since Kevin Love and maybe Kevin Garnett, and he was All-NBA Third Team last season, but his defense is still butt.  (Defense was one thing Thibs hoped Butler would rub off on KAT, but since Butler once called Towns a "fucking pussy," here's guessing it didn't take.)  This is a move sensible franchises make, signing up franchise guys for the long- (or at least intermediate-) term.  I just wonder who actually negotiated this deal for the team.  Was it Thibs?  Was it Taylor?  Did they somehow do this as a collabo?  And if this was a tandem effort, were they able to put their differences over Butler aside in order to do this, or was there bitchy sniping back and forth over Butler (who now cannot stay at all because they have given so much cap space to Towns with this new deal) while they were doing what both of them knew they had to do?

I just can't even with these guys, either.  What seemed like a great situation -- new Coach/GM, two rising superstars, a blockbuster trade to get a third superstar in here -- has wheezed into incredible dysfunction -- bullying, overuse, injury, lack of development, nominal improvement and a very quick exit from the playoffs.  These guys broke a 13-year playoff drought and it looks as though they are going back into the lottery immediately.  I think I have to laugh in order to stop from being disgusted.

Might Run Into That Punk-Ass Concessionaire Kid Again

Two weeks ago I was working the Vikings game.  Sometimes the bathrooms around the truck compound are all being used at the same time, which absolutely sucks.

So I was going around this one afternoon being deprived of the use of a sink to wash my hands because of all the locked doors.  So I go to this one that has a lock that shows whether or not it's unlocked.  This one was not locked.  So I go in ... and see this dude trying to fix his contact lens.  "Whoops.  Sorry.  Maybe I should've locked the door."  Yeah kid, maybe you should have.  Thank God you weren't taking a shit.

So I go and wait just outside the door.  Two, three minutes and he isn't leaving.  Then, like a bat out of hell, two concessionaire workers, both girls of high school age, come walking toward the door.  Then as one of them stops right in front of the door, like me, the other just fucking bursts through it -- remember that the dude inside didn't lock the door.  However, it just so happens that he was about to leave the bathroom, and it also just so happens that they know each other.  They have a quick conversation ... and he leaves the bathroom so she can use it.

Fuck both of you in the ass.  At this point I am apoplectic.  This young bitch had to have seen me waiting outside the bathroom and take it as a sign that, you know, I'm waiting to use the fucking bathroom.  But no, she doesn't give a fuck, she cuts in front of me and barges in, and she is so goddamn lucky that the guy using it was on his way out.  Unbelievable!

I am furious.  And since she was in there for a bit, I thought about what I would do.  Did I calm myself down?  Hell no!  As soon as she opened the door -- completely ignoring my presence, again -- I, uh, made my presence known.  Before she could step through the threshold, I step in, almost block her path, and with my left arm shove her aside.  I may have even grabbed her shoulder.  I may be vague or even incorrect on the details, but you know what?  I don't give a fuck.  She was rude enough to cut in front of me, I think I can be rude back to her.  My goodness, my blood pressure is going through the roof as I try to imagine that scene all over again.

I am not sure if I saw her after I got done washing my hands.  I did run through a gaggle of girls wearing the white shirts and black pants of concession workers, and there were enough brunettes where it was possible that one of them was the person who was so rude to me, but I wasn't sure.  Nevertheless, after I confidently walked by them, I hid behind the trucks and coaches as I worked on my computer.  I'm not backing down, but I'm not stupid.

So that was two weeks ago.  And I will be working today's Vikings game.  I wonder if I'll run into her.  I wonder if she remembers me.  I wonder if she'll be rude to me again.  And I wonder if I'll have to defend myself again.