Thursday, March 5, 2015

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: Wild (Last Week: -4).  If I recall correctly, Brandon Mileski, Producer of The Fan's Common Man Progrum (love The Preposterous Statement Tournament this year, by the way) said that the Wild need to be in playoff position by the time the calendar turns to March; otherwise, the harder schedule from then on out will eat the club alive.  Well, if I recall correctly, I looked up the standings on a paper copy of the Star Tribune on Sunday, March 1 and they were in seventh place.  Good, right?

That was after winning the first two games in the screening week -- more impressively on the road, most impressively the first of which against Nashville, the best team in the Western Conference (the other was against Colorado, which resorted to taking cheap shots at the end of the game; it's as if Bastard Quebec Nordiques Head Coach Patrick Roy has something against the Wild).  They finished the week off with a win (via Shootout, and at home, so it's not 100% clean, but it goes down as maximum points) over Ottawa, which still keeps them in seventh, but they are now three points clear of the three teams fighting for eighth, and is only a point behind Winnipeg for fifth.  This team is good, and things are looking up, so of course they take the top spot in the WMNSS.

I don't know how much I've ruminated on this, but the trade General Manager Chuck Fletcher made to get Devan Dubnyk basically saved this squad's season.  There were many other things the Wild had to get past which coincided with Dubnyk's arrival (the mumps epidemic, the passing of the fathers of Ryan Suter and Zach Parise), and I don't think Fletch thought Dubnyk would be a miracle worker.  But he has; the National Hockey League recognized that by calling the Goaltender The First Star For February, the fist member of the organization ever to get that award.

It's March, so the schedule is supposed to get bad.  They are playing in Washington as we speak.  Tomorrow they visit Carolina; home games against Colorado and New Jersey follow.

#-1: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -7).  And finally these Gophers get off the schneid.  And how: They take all three games on the road against Florida Gulf Coast, the alma mater of (now injured) Chicago White Sox ace Chris Sale.  Moreover -- even though it really shouldn't count -- they played the Minnesota Twins Wednesday night at their Spring Training stadium in. Ft. Myers, Fla., and only lost 3-1.  I saw the beginning of the rerun on Fox Sports North this (Thursday) afternoon when I was eating at Hooters, and it looked like the Gophs had momentum going in the top of the first inning, but they only managed to scratch one run in.  The Twinks tied it in the bottom of the first, and the pros took it from there.  It would've been especially embarrassing for the Twinks if they lost to a college team; they were so close.

Back to the games that count, and the schedule shenanigans begin again; because it's too cold and the stadium needs another day to thaw, this weekend's three-game series at Creighton will begin on Saturday, night Friday.  Sunday will feature a doubleheader, the second of which will begin at 3:30.

#-2: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: -5).  OK, when I last wrote about this team in last week's survey, I was thanking my lucky stars that their game at Michigan St. stretched into Overtime, thereby sparing me the need to redo this squad's blurb to account for the loss.  Somehow the Spartans, a program I have admired so much (I think Tom Izzo may be the best pound-for-pound Head Coach, in any sport, at any level, in the country) but has some serious issues this year, fouled Minnesota players shooting a three-pointer not once, but twice, in the final minutes.  The first time was a miss, but Joey King sank all three free throws.  The second time the trey by Carlos Morris actually went in, but he failed to end the game in regulation when he couldn't complete the four-point play from the charity stripe.  No matter; the Gophers coasted in the extra session to snap a three-game losing streak and give Minnesota its first win in East Lansing since 1997 (which technically doesn't count; the NCAA struck all victories from the '97 season because of the Gangelhoff Scandal).

Unfortunately the losing streak is about to begin again.  They currently are hosting Wisconsin, which are one win away from the B1G regular season title, and the Badgers lead at the half as of press time.  They finish the regular season at home Sunday afternoon versus Penn St., then likely will play in the first round of the conference tournament Wednesday.

#-3: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -1).  They're in the NCAA Tournament regardless.  Their shit-kicking of MSU-Mankato in the quarts of the WCHA conference tourney by scores of 10-0 and 5-1 shows how unbalanced the talent in women's college hockey still is.  I'm not putting them fourth because they're bad; like I've said before, get back to the Frozen Four Final and call me.

They had to the WCHA Final Face-Off, where it is not a best-two-out-of-three series but a four-team tournament.  Switching it up like soccer.  They face Bemidji St. Saturday, then either host North Dakota or Wisconsin Sunday.

#-4: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -2).  A split vs. Michigan St. at home isn't good if this team wants to take the regular season championship.  Ah, who cares; if Michigan (which is three points up on the Goofs going into this weekend) wants to take it, let them.  Winning the conference tournament title (and the automatic bid that goes with it) that counts.  Besides, it's the Wolverines and Minnesota that seem to be the only teams that have resumes good enough to get into the NCAA Tournament without winning the conference tournament title.  And right now, these skaters are still projected to be in.

Their penultimate series is the last road series of the year, versus Ohio St.

#-5: Gopher softball (Last Week: Positive Numbers).  Whoops -- this team got into a big slip-up this weekend, shutting out Mississippi St. 5-0 but then losing three in a row, to James Madison, Fordham and Alabama-Birmingham.  That loss to the Blazers was an excruciating one, 1-0, but Sara Groenewegen went the distance in that game, and the run was unearned.  She also pitched a complete game in the win over the Bulldogs, and thus has been named the Big Ten Pitcher Of The Week.

Sad, unfortunately, to see the banner boasting of the long-anticipated home season-opening series against Michigan because the rank, the number in front of "Minnesota," has dropped from 11 to 17.  Meanwhile, the Wolverines are still ranked second.

Softball schedules are weird.  These Golden Gophers now play in the Louisville Slugger Classic in Palo Alto, Calif.  They play four games.  Three of them are against Stanford, which is in Palo Alto.  The other game is against Santa Clara ... which is considered the host of this tournament.  So the school that is actually in the city that is hosting this tourney is essentially a visiting team?  And Minnesota plays three games against one club but only one against another?  Uh, sure. ...

#-6: Swarm (Re-Entry!).  After a promising start, the Smarm are going backwards.  The latest setback is a 21-15 loss in Vancouver, where they never recovered from a 7-3 first quarter.

Odd: This loss to the Stealth was its first in 14 days.  Their next game is 14 days from then.  Nice scheduling there, guys.

#-7: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -3).  I'm sinking this team this low partially because it's a wake-up call.  Very few teams are dominant on the road; I get that.  And the team had to have looked at the end of the regular season (road games against Nebraska and Iowa) and took a deep breath.

Did I expect them to win in Iowa Sunday?  No.  Did I fear that they would lose by 16?  Yes.  Would it have helped if they didn't lose, let alone get their asses handed to them?  Fuck yeah.  And now, although they seem to be a lock for The Big Dance, their seed is sliding into a very sour spot.  Both Charlie Creme and College Sports Madness have the club as an 8-seed.  Both sites also have the Gophs potentially facing UConn in the second round -- aka, a sure defeat.

I'm under no illusion that this club can win the NCAA title if not for the Huskies.  But I am serious that this team is good, and can be scary good.  Can they beat UConn?  Probably not.  Any other 1-seed, such as Notre Dame and South Carolina?  Probably not.  But 2- and 3-seeds, from Tennessee to Arizona St., even Iowa, the team they just lost to?  The top 16 seeds get to play at home, but honestly, I think that with Big Ten Player Of The Player Amanda Zahui B. (at least according to the media, and congratulations to her on that big achievement) patrolling the paint, they can take them out.  I really do.  Consequently, that means that playing to seed in this week's B1G tournament is the worst thing they can do.  Honestly, I wouldn't mind if they lost to Purdue this (Thursday) evening.  Because if they do, they possibly slip into the 10-seed and face a 2- and then a 3-seed in their second and third tournament games, respectively, which, I believe, are not unwinnable.  Otherwise, if they beat the Boilermakers, they have to win their next game, against Ohio St., in order to maybe move back up into a 7- or even a 6-seed and push back facing the top seed in the region until the Regional Final.  They have to either get better or worse; staying put for seeding is a disaster.

#-8: Timberwolves (Last Week: 0).  I forgot to add one thing to the Woofie Dogs' blurb in last week's survey, although it's not much.  We all know this team sucks, even with the addition of Adopted Hometown Son Kevin Garnett, even if he can provide the leadership these young pups need.  Along with the win they earned, I put them second-best (which last week equated to a 0) mostly because I wanted to throw this team a bone.

This week I have to yank away that bone, and that the reality that a 38-year-old Big Ticket won't automatically transform this team to a respectable outfit has been reinforced with an 0-4 screening week, the last three of which were at home.  To be fair, the first three losses were against playoff teams.  But the fourth one wasn't; it was against the Denver Nuggets, a team barely ahead of the Wolves in the standings which fired Head Coach Brian Shaw Tuesday after it was revealed that after a time-out during their loss to Utah Friday the team broke the huddle with the phrase, "1-2-3-- six weeks!"  "Six weeks," in case you don't get it, is the length of the remaining regular season.  So it's obvious they have checked out.  Does that mean that Shaw should have been fired, however?  I don't think so.  That isn't a sign that he has lost the locker room (although I have seen some headlines saying that Shaw never really had it in the first place).  I really believe that that is a self-effacing chant and an admission to a long, losing season.  That has nothing to do with the Head Coach, per se.

Still, firings have a way of getting the team's attention and forcing them to work hard, for at least one game.  And Nuggets front office probably saw that their next game was against woeful Minnesota and wanted to start Interim HC Melvin Hunt's tenure on a high note.  And they did.  Against us.  Oh well, at least Andrew Wiggins became a four-time Western Conference Rookie Of The Month.

They finish up their four-game homestand against Portland, then embark on a boys' state high school-mandated four-game road trip with games at the Clippers and Phoenix.

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