Things About This Job

• I still can't stand my supervisors. Self-absorbed, petty nightcrawlers, the both of them. And my supervisor supervisor had better get off her goddamn phone.
• I don't know how successful I am. I keep running around the store, finding things I need to do, yet at the end of my shift I have no idea if I did anything new, let alone right. They look exactly the same as it did at the beginning of the night.
• I'm on my own most of the time -- well, besides the times I'm not nagged to do something else, which I hate -- which is good and bad. Bad because I always feel like I'm not doing the right thing. Many times I'm not doing it right, and I know it. And since there are cameras everywhere I can't get away with it, even though I probably can't help it. However, if I am not getting nagged and my supervisors don't catch me doing something wrong, I can get away with things so long as I act busy. Although I may not be successful, if I'm left to my own devices, there are days that, given the right frame of mind, I'm OK with doing my best, even if it's clearly not what they're looking for. Whenever I'm running around looking for something and failing, all I can think of is, Well, I'm still getting paid, so whatever.
• I thought I'd be able to work late at night like I did eight years ago. But it's hard to stay up, especially when I hit the wall around 4 o'clock. By the time we leave I'm just trying to stay on my feet. That's when I try to challenge myself to find things. Using my mind keeps me alert.
• As much as I don't respect my supervisors, I have a lot of respect for my fellow employees. Good guys, almost to a man.
• I want to take breaks when I want to.
• I picked this store because it's out of the way. I do not want anybody I know knowing that I work here. But now that I see that it's "x" amount of miles to and back, I stopped caring about that. I regret choosing this store instead of one closer to home. Now I have two reasons to regret taking this job.