Addendum To: Screwing Things Up Food-Wise Lately (ETA: Well, Maybe Not Lately, More Like A Few Weeks Ago)

See, what I did just tonight, after coming home from working the night shift job, illustrates how I lose my willpower, and eat food I don't need to eat, thus spending money I really shouldn't spend.

I did not spend any money Monday.  I went straight home from work.  As soon as I got home I felt horrible pangs of hunger.  I ate decently; at my evening shift job I chased a banana and some bite-sized chocolates down with coffee.  But I was starving once I got home, and I couldn't believe those urges hit me because I felt my stomach and I'm still fat!!!  But I had to lunge at something, and seeing that there was not juice I could down my gullet, I reached for Father's stash of peanuts (his go-to snack) and ate several handfuls.  I woke up with a lot of energy and my colon blocked up like someone poured concrete up my rectum.  Seriously, I tried to shit tonight (Tuesday night), and I was pooping pellets.

Tuesday I had to fill up my car; Discount Tuesdays and all.  And since I had to charge my credit card for gas, I thought I might as well use it for a bunch of other stuff, like the juice (which I had been trying to get for over a week now but simply forgot) and Taco Bell, to make sure that the hunger pangs won't hit once I got home.

I did not expect, however, that a very sweet person working in the same room as I for the evening shift job would bring in banana bread and butter.  The bread was great, but the butter ... hmmm, butter.  And so I ate three slices of it, each with a huge slab of butter.

And so I was stuffed before I even left work.  But did that sate me all the way home?  No.  I stopped at Target to get juice and think about whether I should eat one more time, and then I decided to stop by at the local TB to try their new Doubledilla.

Now I am stuffed and feeling both fat and very guilty.  The upshot to that is I won't be eating out before coming home tonight (Wednesday) because 1) I do not have to get gas so I won't have to pull out my wallet for anything and 2) I am going to not stuff my face after doing so last (Tuesday) night.  Still, I shelled out $6.30 or so for Taco Bell and a can of Coke.  Did I really have to do that?  Doing that two times or even one time a week has always added up.

The credit card statement came today.  I will not open it.  I'll just avoid looking at the total I will pay when I go online.