So, About Relaxing And Eating Clean After My Massage ...

I had plans on emptying my stomach and going to bed early after my message Monday afternoon.  It seems right, doesn't it?  After you get your knots kneaded out of you and you replenish with water, you let your body rest by not eating the rest of the day and, in fact, just crawling into your bed to sleep, early and long.

Yeah, well, that went to hell.  I actually got a lot done yesterday -- had an interview (though I arrived a half-hour later than I should have and I almost was told to leave), got my hair cut by a stripper, and finally filled my car's gas tank.  But after the massage I had nothing to do.  My plan was not to eat at home and to, instead, fast.  But I was banking on using the time between the massage and going home in the evening to go to the library (the haircut was after the massage, by the way).  That plan went out the window when I learned that all the county libraries were closed because of Presidents' Day.

I then mentally scrambled for options.  I thought about having coffee while chilling at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division), but I vowed not to use cash Monday.  I then started to chuck the notion that I would keep my stomach empty and my body clean by seeing if I could latch onto Happy Hours at a couple places, Victory 44 and Nightingale.  By the time the stripper cut my hair, it was too late to get to Happy Hour.

Finally I remembered that Dunkin' Donuts recently moved back into town.  There was one in Roseville, so I figured I'd just go there and enjoy the return of the first big donut place I remember.  Then, while on the move, I saw on Google Maps that another Dunkin' Donuts was open in New Hope.  I was in Plymouth.  So, I went there and ate two donuts and drank coffee.  Then, because it would still be too early to get home and I thought I was still a tad hungry, I got a third donut.  And somehow, that third damn donut took me from sated to overstuffed.  And I'm still feeling it now, as I blog this.

Oh, and I'm not doing a whole lot of relaxing either because I've been looking up porn for much of the night.  My heart's palpitating and my stomach distended -- basically I feel just as paunchy and dirty as I did before the massage, which was not the plan.  FML.