Expenses Without Receipts

Starting from Monday, March 31:

• Welp, I'll have to leap all the way back to my birthday, when I gave myself a birthday gift of an HJ from ******e at her place in south Minneapolis.  Glad to see I can pud out when coaxed.  And she didn't overcharge me this time either: $120.
• After getting drained I walked over to Matt's Bar.  The Jucy Lucy has such a worldwide reputation that a group of people from outside the country asked for a table -- "four guys from France," they confessed.  Well, bonjour!  Jucy Lucy, half order of fries, Coke and tip: $22.
• On Tuesday the 11th I may have had the worst shave of my life at the school there.  The guy kind of didn't give a shit about me.  He cut me up in a couple of places on my face.  I think he stopped during my shave to give himself a shave.  And he finished off the session by squirting alcohol all over my eyes as well as my cheeks.  I'm trying not to think this was due to malevolence, but to make sure, I am staying away from this place -- and instead paying a lot more money for a shave -- for the next half-year, just to make sure he's moved on before I come back there.  I don't remember the last time I only tipped two bucks, but hey, he deserved it.  Total cost: $11.
• This was the day ****e* went to my house to clean.  I offered to get her dinner.  She wanted Potbelly.  She was going to subtract the cost of the sandwich from her cleaning job, but I spent, with tip: $7.48.
• Meanwhile, as she was about to start, we were talking in the bathroom.  And like it was no big deal, she started to take her clothes off in front of me.  She usually changes into her cleaning clothes, so it's not quite like that.  But I don't know if she was doing it in front of me absentmindedly or if she felt that, because she has been naked for me when she was a stripper, she just felt comfortable changing clothes in front of me.  Still, she has never let me see her change clothes, so I instinctively started touching myself.  I should've pulled down my pants and started masturbating in front of her, but I really needed her to clean the house.  Anyway, she once again did a fantastic job, and I'm glad she was able to take care of the house after more than a year away.  Cost: $240.
• Friday, March 7 ... went to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Version) for one last fling before my parents came home.  Cover, twenty dances with my ATF, drinks for her and for me, and tips, and it all came out to: $240.
• Tuesday, March 4: Saw my first movie in a while, the latest in the MCU, Captain America: Brave New World.  It's ... fine, but the entire series is lacking direction since Endgame.  But I still try and catch every film because I am story-committed.  Price of the ticket: $5.42.
• And now, back to Wednesday, February 26, when I got lottery tickets for Father: $20.
• Later that evening I participated in a volunteer effort spearheaded by, of all people, my financial advisor.  I have never met him, but this was a meal-packing event that was only ten minutes away from home, so I figure that after other e-mails from him inviting me to other volunteer opportunities, I should finally introduce myself.  It was nice, and afterward we went to a nearby restaurant to eat -- all on his company's dime!  I should've bought more food and took some home.  Anyway, I donated to the organization we volunteered at: $5.

Good through March 31.

May Have Crossed A (Time) Line I Shouldn''t Have Crossed At Work

This has never been spelled out as official or even common policy, but from what I have been told in the (way) past and from what I have been able to get away with, whenever there is work to be done that needs to be done but can't be done within your usual eight-hour work shift, you can stay up to two hours, or (duh) ten hours.  Because work in The Third Department has been kicking my ass ever since the holidays, I've done ten hours frequently.  Lately, the work hasn't been done within ten hours, so I've left it for the next day and, sometimes, for the person doing in position for me.

Regardless, for many, many years now, I have held that ten-hour overtime standard as sacrosanct, a sort of demilitarized zone.  Not that I've never crossed it; I think I have pulled in way more than ten hours on a couple occasions, although those were under extremely unforeseen circumstances, and I may have clocked out a minute after ten hours once or twice.  But it's pretty much a no-go, a line you don't you don't come back from.  Since the New Year, even if the work has been overwhelming, I have swallowed my pride, resigned myself that I couldn't accomplish all that I wanted to accomplish, and packed up and left at exactly ten hours.

Till yesterday/Friday.  There were tests I needed to prepare.  A lot of them, and that has been a major contributing factor to me staying late whenever I'm in The Third Department.  I have been trying my best to get through them quicker, but I have been making very little progress.  I remember that on Thursday, there was a test that had me so confused that I needed to talk to someone three times to figure out what to do.  I want to say that I spent at least 45 minutes on it, but it could have been an hour.  That was incredibly frustrating, and typical of my problems in trying to get through these tests.  Now add that lately there's been at least half a dozen of them every day I work in The Third Department and that they come in during the afternoon, and you can see how that pushes my day past eight hours.

That happened yesterday/Friday.  However, the tests that I prepared this time around actually were easy, at least easier compared to the ones I usually encounter.  I got through them faster than I usually do.  And that, to be honest, kind of gave me a rush.  It made me feel as though I finally "got it," that I in fact have "mastered" how to do them.

And then I remembered that I have all these other things that should be done before I leave for the day, and that I have, oh, less than an hour to do them.  I still felt good, however; those half dozen or so tests I thought would have consumed the rest of my ten hours, and there would have been a lot of hell to pay by my supervisor and boss for not getting to the other tasks they say should be done.  But I had time yesterday/Friday, and so I delved into that work ... and then my ten hours were getting close to being up, and I wasn't quite finished.  And then I saw a mistake that I needed to fax out again and, after deciding that fax could be done by my co-worker tomorrow, I changed my mind and thought it best I do it -- knowing that would probably push me past ten hours.

And it did.  I clocked out ten hours and ten minutes after work began.  Now, you may say what's the big deal, it's just ten minutes.  Like I have blog posted before, neither of my superiors have lately took me to task for staying an extra couple hours.  Heck, before she left work yesterday/Friday, my supervisor said I shouldn't go past ten hours.  However, I can see, from their vantage point, me staying an extra ten minutes is, to put it in a way, overtime creep.  I should tell you that on Monday, I overstayed my lunch break by ten minutes because I didn't set the alarm on my phone correctly and overslept.  The policy at that point is to stay as long as you overstayed your lunch break.  Well, I did that and worked ten hours total and still clocked out a few minutes later than that because I needed to tie up loose ends.  My supervisor and boss will know that I did that Monday, stayed a few minutes further than that yesterday/Friday, and start to question how long I am staying for OT, and why.

This all could change, and soon.  Next week everyone one of us are supposed to have a meeting about The Third Department, with a goal of getting enough of the work done each day so that no one is taking overtime.  I don't see how that is possible without a second person working in The Third Department at least half the day, but that is my boss' goal.  Maybe what I did this week is a sign to him that changes to this department can't come soon enough.  And maybe this will accelerate scrutiny of my work day and work processes.  Which would suck because, all the stress this job is putting me through aside, I do love making OT money.  I checked my bank account and saw that my latest paycheck is significantly bigger than the one before it.  Will this money train stop?

Pressure At Work --> Eating (Out Of Order) At Home

So I just ate a slice of turkey and colby jack cheese even though I ate a cookie and part of a brownie a couple hours before then.  I have a rule whereby if I have dessert, I eat no other food that night.  Dessert is the last thing you eat, so you don't eat anything else after that, right?

Well, I did, partly because I realized I bought more food than I can finish before my parents come home, and partly because work is still stressing me the fuck out.  I am absolutely convinced now that The Third Department is a two-person department, and firing one and letting the other retire without filling her position full-time has become a mistake because I worked back there, by myself, for another ten hours yesterday/Thursday and, once again, I still did not get everything done.  In fact, I think I left more work (for myself; I'm there again today/Friday) than I have ever before.  It's a combination of heavy work that came in late and one particular test that I swear took 45 minutes and talking to four other people, one of them three times, to finally figure out.  Tedious problems like that take time, and frankly, I don't have a lot working in The Third Department to spare.

What makes this day worse is I kind of told my boss about the workload I was facing.  He was about to leave, and as he normally does, he asks all of us how we're doing.  My thinking was there was no hiding or sugarcoating all the work that was still coming in.  I think he knows this and is at least tolerant about this; otherwise, he would be on my case for working overtime so often.  The problem this time around is that he asked me, semi-point blank, "How late (do you think you're staying)?"  I hesitated; part of me was really frustrated throughout the whole day (seriously, one comment that I decided to take wrong and I would have exploded -- that's how bad my day turned out to be) and wanted to let him know that, the other part wanted to keep my head down because my cover would have been blown, in a way, and then I would lose all the OT holding in all this frustration is for.  Luckily (?), my co-worker immediately asked him a question and he gave her his attention, and once he answered her, he left for the day.

I am afraid, then, that he will remember that he asked me how long I was staying yesterday/Thursday when he reviews my timesheet.  He then might start to impose time restrictions for me to prevent me from taking any more overtime.  That day is coming anyway, but like I said, I am holding my temper in just because of all the OT I'm racking up, so I want to do (or not do) all I can to not jeopardize the gravy train before I have to get off.  At the very least I am going to receive more scrutiny from my supervisor -- I will come in in the morning and she'll say, "Do this and I'll do that," and I don't how I will feel from such a direct order.  Maybe I'll be relieved to finally have some direction.  Or, maybe this is the start of being reined in to just eight hours of work per day.

So that's what awaits me today/Friday.  At least I will face it with a full stomach, even though I ate stuff after dessert

On Procrastinating Drinking And Potentially Overthinking

I might be a manic person, because after a couple hours of surfing the Internet, looking at porn and touching myself, I'm finally getting around to making and drinking the Long Island iced tea that I should have drank at least around 10 p.m., not just before I am supposed to go to bed.  In the meantime, I'm thinking about my ATF, ******a, who texted me, "Busy tonight?" when 1) yes, I was busy tonight volunteering and 2) I thought I told her that I could see her at My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Edition) next week, not this week, and now I'm scared that I gave her tone when I told her no, I can't see her last/Wednesday night because she didn't text back with hearts or a kissing emoji like she used to.  Dammit, did I piss her off?  See, this is why I can't have relationships: I'll stick my foot in my mouth, she'll get angry, I'll rack my brain figuring out what I did wrong, and I'll conclude that the relationship is ruined beyond repair.  And this is why I go to stripclubs.

In the meantime, I have chores to do for tomorrow.  I need to pay the city the water and sewer bill.  I have to label the gas station-brand coffee creamer I bought after the post-volunteer dinner.  I need to make a sandwich for myself for work, opening up this special non-preserved loaf of bread that needs to be eaten in five days or else.  And finally, I need to make sure I pack an MNUFC jersey in my bag because I'm going to a Loons-themed concert at First Avenue tonight/Thursday night.

And I'm doing all this to while listening to Tommy Richman's "Million Dollar Baby" on a loop.  Not gonna lie, I love this song, and I've loved it ever since I heard it on that Wingstop commercial.  Since it clocks in at less than three minutes it's barely a song, but goddamn is it catchy!  Do you know there are YouTube videos of this song being played on a loop?  I'm listening to one where it's been recorded on repeat for up to an hour.  I wish the ending and beginning was more seamless, but no matter -- I am pushing through these tasks while listening to this earworm.

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: Gopher men's hockey (Last Week: -2).  Against a really good top-ten-ranked Ohio St. outfit at Mariucci, the Golden Gophers swept over the weekend by scores of 4-1 and 6-3.  The U. was ranked fifth in at least one poll, so this was an even matchup on paper.  That they were able to pull off a pair of three-Goal Wins augurs well for this team.  Oh, and they rocketed up from fifth to second in this Week's USCHO.com poll.  Yeah, that deserves above negative numbers.

They finish the regular season this weekend at Penn St., a club that, at least when it comes to the PairWise, is still out of the NCAA Tournament but has won nine out of their past 13 Games.  They just swept the top team in the Big Ten, Michigan St. (even though one was won in a Shootout) in East Lansing.  Again, Minnesota's in the tournament, but if the Nittany Lions are playing as if their tourney lives depend on it -- and they do -- the Gophs will end the regular season on a sour note.

#-1: Gopher women's basketball (Last Week: -7).  Finally did on Wednesday they didn't do the previous screening Week: Beat beatable teams.  In their only Game of the Week, they drubbed Purdue in West Lafayette, Ind., by a baker's dozen (74-61).  Charlie Creme still has this team in the "real" Big Dance, but will that change now that the U. (and women's basketball) has reached the end of its season?  The Gophers host Washington tonight/Wednesday night, then travel to ranked Michigan St. Saturday afternoon.

#-2: Gopher women's hockey (Last Week: -6).  Finally, the regular season is done.  And they finished it by sweeping Minnesota-Duluth at Ridder over the weekend, even though they were both one-Goal affairs (3-2 Friday, 1-0 Saturday).  And so the pairings for the WCHA Tournament (the final one to take place at a neutral site, namely at the X) are finally set, and the U. hosts Minnesota State-Mankato this weekend in a best two-out-of-three.

#-3: Gopher softball (Last Week: -5).  Could be worse ... went 3-2 in the Mary Nutter Collegiate Classic in Cathedral City, Calif.  Getting blanked by Duke (albeit 2-0) and Mercy Ruled by Tennessee (9-1 after five Innings) isn't good, but victories over Fresno St., Missouri and Long Beach State kind of make up for that.

They now finally come home -- albeit at the Vikings stadium -- to host their own softball tournament, The Gopher Indoor Classic, this weekend.  They will play North Dakota St. twice and Wagner, Miami (OH) and St. Thomas once.

#-4: Timberwolves (Last Week: -1).  Picked up off the All-Star Break by losing at Houston by six, then getting outclassed by The Bastard Seattle SuperSonics at home by seven.  But, and I have to give them credit here, on Monday, almost one full day after they played and lost at home, they flew down to Oklahoma City and, despite between down by as many as 25 Points in the Third Quarter, the Wolves scored the last 16 Points in regulation to force Overtime, where they continued to show their stick-to-itiveness in winning, 130-123.  It ties the Minnesota Timberwolves record for greatest comeback victory ever, and it is the first time in NBA history that a team was down by that many Points (which, to emphasize, was 16) with four Minutes left in the Fourth Quarter and win -- and this was against The Best Team In The Western Conference.

What was so striking about that tilt was Chris Finch's reliance on the youngsters, namely Jaylen Clark (who started that Game against The Bastard SuperSonics), Terrence Shannon, Jr., and Rob Dillingham.  They acquitted themselves quite well in this victory, which was not assured after Rudy Gobert sat out again because of his back spasms and Anthony Edwards sat out much of the Fourth-Quarter comeback because of his hamstring.  At the very least, the squad now has solid proof they can win against anybody no matter how dire the situation is.  Better case: The young pups now understand how to win in the NBA, and so they'll provide the injection of freshness that, combined with the experience of the rest of the team, might, just might, put them over the top.

They finish their four-Game road trip at The Team That Was Stolen From Us v.1.0, then The Bastard New Orleans Jazz (on back-to-back nights), then Phoenix.  They are home for just one contest, on Tuesday versus Philadelphia.

#-5: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -3).  Lost two-of-three in the Karbach Round Rock Classic in Round Rock, Tex.  Dropped close Games to Oklahoma (3-2 Friday afternoon) and second-ranked Virginia (4-2 Saturday afternoon).  But, on Sunday afternoon, they upset seventh-ranked Oregon St. going away, 10-4.  I don't know if this is a foundation block, but you get your Wins whenever you can get them.

A three-Game set at Arizona St., then they finally open up the home portion of their schedule facing Wisconsin-Milwaukee at U. S. Bank Stadium Tuesday.

#-6: Wild (Re-Entry!).  Got back from their 4 Nations Faceoff Break (inspired tournament idea, by the way, so grudging respect is given to National Hockey League Commissioner Gary Bettman) by splitting a home-and-home series versus The Detroit Red Wings where the road team won.  They still have the seventh-best record in the National Hockey League (even though it's a tie).  But they need to continue to remain resilient as Kirill Kaprizov and Joel Eriksson Ek continue to nurse injuries.

However, they are this low because of fuckin' Bill Guerin, who served as General Manager for Team USA for the 4 Nations.  He wanted to court the attention of the orange asshole currently installed in the White House.  Guerin praised the president for adding a "political flair" for the two 4 Nations Games between the U. S. and Canada, and I am fucking astounded that yet another person, without any prompting, just kissed that corrupt traitor's ass because he wanted his goddamn attention.  Everything Trump touches dies, as you saw when Canada beat Team USA in the 4 Nations Final.  Also, the Red Wings scored three Goals in last/Tuesday night's tilt after the Wild went up on them 2-0.  So if this squad spirals out of playoff contention, blame Guerin for his unnecessary and grotesque fellating.

Busy Week -- at Utah and Colorado (two places that stole their hockey clubs) back-to-back, then hosting Boston, then going out to Seattle.

#-7: United FC (New Season!!).  So, for the second time in ... uh, I want to say four seasons, the Loons serve as visitors for the kick-off Match for the Major League Soccer season, this time visiting LAFC, or Laugh-See.  And they lost, 1-0, on a shot by Jeremy Ebobisse, the journeyman Striker who was available for MNUFC's first-ever Draft (as well as everyone else; United FC had the #1 pick in that SuperDraft).  I'm not saying this is the soccer version of the Timberwolves passing up Steph Curry not once but twice to select Ricky Rubio and Johnny Flynn, but you can see the similarities.  Anyway, the Goal was a cross-post once from just outside one corner of the box.  The defender, and I don't know who it is, should have stepped up to block the shot, or least disrupt his timing.  The thing I can't get over is Ebobisse launched into the kick by pulling back his kicking leg really far behind him.  At that point, it's like a snake hissing before it bites.  And you see kick attempts like this all the time, so why not step up once a player rears back with his leg?

So the sky isn't falling, but the Loons took the L.  There are some prognosticators who are pretty bullish on United FC making some noise in the postseason.  We'll see.  In the meantime, they have their home opener Saturday night vs. Montreal.  I, of course, will be there.

#-8: Gopher men's basketball (Last Week: 0).  I really thought their sweep of both Los Angeles schools in L. A. would be the booster for the rocket ship that is this program for the rest of the Year.  After all, they had two middling teams, Penn St. and Northwestern, to play this screening Week, and both were playing at The Barn.  And yet, goddamn, the Goofers lost both Games, by nine to the Nittany Lions and by a dozen to Northwestern.  There's no getting this team, just none.

Thankfully there's only one tilt this Week, but it is at Nebraska.

Addendum To: Making The Pieces Fit

Well, all my inveighing last night is all for naught due to two things.  One, I was reminded that the financial advisor for one of my accounts is hosting a meal-packing event very close to where I live.  I have very few issues with the way my account is going right now, but he has been my financial advisor for a while and I have never met him.  He works closer to 394, so as long as he's up near my neck of the woods, and I can see him before the 'Rents come home, and there are a couple things I can talk to him about my account face-to-face, and I decided that I should stay awake tomorrow/Wednesday evening and volunteer.

The other thing is The State Of The Union Address.  I forgot that that motherfucker gets to have one out of the bat even though he was officially installed just over a month ago (it might not technically be called his State of the Union address, but it doesn't matter, he's getting a platform).  Yes, I hate him enough that I don't want to be even near a TV when he's vomiting his lies through his fat lips.  So I am making a point of seeing a movie, probably Captain America: Brave New World, right during the SOTU address.  So a quiet night is out the window on that night, too.

I have fun things I want to do before they come home, but I need a couple slow weeknights, too, just so I can start cleaning up at home and just because I need the break.  But as you can see above, I have my reasons not to do so.  That means that I will have no time to myself to get the house ready unless I take the weekends to do it.  And that might be my only recourse now.

Making The Pieces Fit

First of all, in an addendum to my previous blog post, I am going to compromise and come in at 7.  I really don't want to report to work at 6:30, but since my call time tomorrow/Tuesday and Wednesday is 7, I guess I wake up at 6 for a third straight day.

Assuming I am not explicitly allowed to stay for more than ten hours -- and I don't know if I would want to anyway -- I am leaving at 5:30.  That gives me plenty of time to go downtown for a massage I think I want to get before my parents come home.  Through much of yesterday/Sunday, I was trying to see if I should get a massage tonight/Monday night or next week.  It is one of half a dozen things (I wrote it down in my day planner) that I want to do before they come home.  I want to do three of them this week and three next, just so I have plenty of down time/quiet nights at home/nights where I can begin throwing my stuff back into boxes to put them back in storage.

Which things to do and when has become like solving a puzzle.  There are a lot of restrictions I have place on myself because of my OCD.  For example, beyond the 3-and-3 thing, I had a rule where I won't go downtown more than once a workweek.  That's been thrown out the window because there's a chance that I will be going to the Timberwolves Game next week.  If that's the case, and I still want to get a massage, I'll have to go downtown twice this week because I'm going to a concert at First Ave. on Thursday.  Oh, I should go back ... I could have gotten a massage from a place closer to home, but there is no female masseuses working Monday evenings, at least not apparently.  And I can't fit in a massage any day the next two weeks other than Mondays, so even though this place downtown is more expensive, I think my body is worth it, so I'm getting one tonight/Monday night.

Oh, another thing ... there might be a stripper awards party -- yeah, I know, right? -- next Monday night I will go to.  One of my ATFs, *****a, is one of the organizers, and I would like to see her.  But you have to dress up, and the ticket is kind of expensive, so I don't know if I want to go.  If I don't, I will eat at a fancy place downtown -- which is one of the half-dozen things I want to do before my parents come back home.  So you see how I'm trying to make all these things fit, and how it could drive one crazy?

Oh, one final thing -- I have to go to bed now.

Sorry, I Can't ... Or Can I?

It is nice to be thanked by your boss for coming in to do overtime.  You like to be liked, and I think that's a condition all humans (at least the ones who aren't dead inside) share.  But we are still behind, and I think way behind, in catching up on work.  Therefore, overtime has been authorized tomorrow/Monday.  We can all come in as soon as 6:30 to enter data.  Before we went yesterday/Saturday, he specifically reminded me that I could come in that early.

Well, I am in The Third Department tomorrow/Monday.  That's already a shitshow in which I have regularly worked ten hours, and that's before last week's storm that has messed everything up.  Back there, we get the forms that come in through these flights.  So, if they are playing catch-up starting tomorrow morning, and they seek to completely catch up tomorrow/Monday, that means that I will be saddled with stuff in The Third Department later that day.  I do no look forward to coming in early, then seeing in fact more work piled upon the work that's already there.  Working ten hours is assured even before getting this OT that's offered in My Main Department.  And, even though I like the money and I think the work would be appreciated, I do not want to work more than ten hours.  Finally, this means waking up very, very early on a Monday.  I am working in My Main Department Tuesday and Wednesday, too, so I could be pulling farmers' hours for three straight days, and I hate that.

I could say that the possibility that I will be leaving work in The Third Department even if I do my regular hours and stay two hours beyond that is very, very high, too.  I did that on Friday, and even though I felt like garbage leaving, I had no choice, and I might not have much of a choice tomorrow/Monday, either.  So why not leave at 5?  I'm not working back there Tuesday.  But ... man, I don't know.  I really don't want to.  But I might anyway.  My boss will appreciate me.  Again, who wouldn't want your boss to like you?

Runnin' On Empty

No, I do not regret pulling ten hours of work yesterday/Saturday and instead rolling in after watching the EPL in downtown Minneapolis.  I was treated very well, I ate quite well, I had a Bloody Mary for the first time in a long time and it was delish, and, most important of all, I stationed myself at a table where I could see both Matches that were put up in the two TVs in the main room, Arsenal 0-1 West Ham (to my left) and Ipswich Town 1-4 Tottenham Hotspur (to my right).  Drilling down specifically on that point, I was also able to catch all six Goals that went in between the two Games.  I didn't miss one because I was looking down at the breakfast poutine I ordered for myself, to give an example.  Missing a Goal because I wasn't actively looking at the TV at the time a goal went is one of those pet peeves that piss me off, so I'm glad that did not happen this time around.  In fact, seeing the Goals as they went in makes me feel as though I made the right decision to watch soccer in the morning.

Got done at work (well, with all the work that was sent out to us; there is still a lot of work to catch up on, but there weren't enough people to get through all the late work, so I think the supervisor in there called it a day like any normal day) a bit past 4:30.  I thought we would be staying late.  But, since we didn't, I got to veg at Northern Soda Company, which is less than five minutes from work.  I had one of their craft sodas and slushie, and trust me, I am so sugared out that I should be drinking tea.  That didn't stop me from eating a fritter just now to end my day, but yeah, I am not the sugar-high addict I was when I was a childhood.  I feel as though I need to have my foot amputated.

Anyway, I was able to get home and stay awake, even though I am tired as all get out.  I can feel myself crashing, however, so before something bad happens, I want to publish this blog post, brush my teeth, then fall asleep.  If my gas tank isn't empty, I am certainly running on fumes.

Work Sucks Right Now, In So Many Ways

Before I rant and feel sorry for myself, I want to say that I am grateful for the overtime I'm getting.  The money is worth the grief.

Well, at least I say that now.  While I was working yesterday/Friday, it sure as fuck didn't feel that way.  The Third Department is utter fucking chaos now.  It didn't help that all the work that got stuck down South Wednesday finally reached us.  The work that came for me ... I don't know if I have ever left so much work for my co-worker, who is doing The Third Department today/Saturday.  I apologized to her before I left work.  I stayed an extra two hours, like I usually do.  I could've stayed till nine o'clock and not gotten everything done.  Seriously.

There are so many things to keep apprised up in that particular position that I am constantly bombarded with things that crop up which I need to immediately address.  Toward the end of my day (which, because it ran so long, became my night), I saw something that essentially became a "STAT" thing that I had to drop everything to do, and I know I let out a "Fuck!" that I meant as a whisper but was probably loud enough for everybody in the room to hear.  It was that frustrating a day.

It didn't help that I screwed up, which I did right before I saw this "STAT" thing I just had to do.  I basically signed off on, like, a dozen reports that I should not have signed off on.  And so I had to go through each report and fix my mistake.  I had a shit ton to do already, and I didn't need to make it harder on myself by fucking up like I did.  But I realized that I made this mistake because I was not doing these reports every day, and that makes me susceptible to forgetting a process of, say, doing a report.  I see now how hard it is to step into work someone else started.  I can't just apply my training at any point in a particular process.  If I didn't start it, I am likely to screw it up.  And in a job where I hop from position to position, that will mess me up, man.

Aside, and I need to make this vague because, frankly, this may blow up into a shitshow: I may have made a mistake, but I sure as fuck don't like her tone.  There were so many other ways to tell me via e-mail to stop.  And by the way, the mistake started with the person not writing down the date.  What condescending bullshit.  And if she decides to take it up with my supervisor or boss, man, I could be in deep trouble.

With all my venting here, I'm going back to work today/Saturday to help out.  They're still behind, so much so that they might bring in people for Monday.  But goddammit, I'd rather this have happened last weekend, or next weekend.  'Cause this weekend was the only Saturday over at least the next month where I could watch EPL downtown, something I haven't done yet this season.  The combination of Matches kicking off at 9 this/Saturday morning doesn't involve any team that would take over the pub I want to go to, and I can't say that for any day until at least April.  But then this opportunity of working ten hours again has to come up this fucking Saturday.  I could decide to work a full day, but I have decided not to.  One, I really was looking forward to watching soccer, and work like this won't change my mind.  Also, I have pulled ten hours several days over the past few weeks, and I was so stressed after leaving work last/Friday night that I am trying to take time for myself.  I'll watch soccer, then go into work for an abbreviated day.  And if that means passing up some money, so be it.  I'm making plenty this time period.

With all that said, this incident from this e-mail may blow up.  There is a non-zero change that I won't have a job by the time today/Saturday ends.  Just a head's-up.