I think I've already said that I'm a porn addict. One sign that I am is that most times when I log on with something I need to do, I invariably go to a porn website and jerk off until I cum. Only then do I feel like I can go back to doing what it is I intended to do. It's an OCD thing.
Tonight was one of those times, but with a twist. I still need to complete a column about college football's Mythical National Championship -- I know it's already over, I'm still gonna do it -- but ... I don't know when or how to what, but I started looking at porn. And when I start looking at porn, I pull down my pants and start pulling on my cock.
Well, I had gone through page after page, which is routine. There were some good pictures, but it's not as if I'm a premature ejaculator ... most of the time. But then, a few hours ago, while wanking to a good, hot picture, I felt something. I don't know if you guys can relate, but when you touch yourself and you're getting real hot and bothered, and you're shaking your bottle, you feel a muscle twitch so much that ... you feel like your urethra went past a tipping point, you know? Then, you know that you're gonna cum, but because your ejaculate didn't immediately fire out your pisshole, you think you can somehow contain it, and instead the cum just oozes out. Has anyone ever had that feeling? Well, that happened to me.
I've done that before; no big deal. I've been able to orgasm myself, even though the trigger has already been fired, so to speak. So I just kept on jerking my chicken, because I thought I had a ways to go before I could retreat to the bathroom and really knock it off.
But then, as I was going through more really erotic photos, I went a wank too far. I felt that I went "over the edge" again, only this time I wasn't going to be able to contain part of my orgasm. This was all coming out, all at once, all as far as it was going to go. In a split second I said, "Well, I'm in my bedroom, so this is going to cause one hell of a mess, but let it happen."
What I made sure to do was turn away from my desk where my laptop was. But where would I go? If I spin my chair to the right, I'd go to my bed. No. If I went to the left, there were papers and clothes. Good enough. And I let my semen fly. I didn't actively look at my ropes, but coming out of my dick it jettisoned like rockets. I could feel the warmth of my hot cum over my fingers, then over my dick fur, then my genitals, then my groin muscles. I know this was going to be a fucking mess. But I can't stop my urges, or Mother Nature. I just kept cocking my cock, and zoom! out went another projectile.
When I was done, I kind of regretted it; much of it fell just beyond the range of my penis, which meant in landed on my underwear, specifically inside, where, if I just pulled my pants up, I would be sitting right in it. I also got the back of my pajama pants, which sucks because I just changed into them. They're new for the week. (I change pj's about once every two weeks. Yes, I'm a slob. No, I don't go out in them, so it doesn't matter.) Oh well, can't just go to bed in them. Worst of all was all the cum on the chair, right where I spread my legs. And there wasn't a towel in sight.
I am glad, however, I did not throw my dirty clothes in the hamper just yet. So I took off my pants and long underwear (the latter of which have these annoying zippers around the legs, which I did not unzip) and bottomless, I waddled over to these dirty clothes. I used them as rags, cleaning up my hands, then my torso, then the chair, then anything that might have fallen on the floor (no idea exactly where). I put on my old pajama bottoms -- I'll be wearing the red ones for a third week -- sans undies, rolled all my soon-to-be-crusty laundry into a ball, and headed out to the hamper, which is right next to the bathroom, where I proceeded not to masturbate, but now to clean off for good and then brush my teeth.
I really don't want to prematurely cum like that again. I don't know how it happened to me. I'm not that responsive. I don't think it'll happen again.
But you know what? It felt guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuud!
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