Monday, October 15, 2012

Oh My God, I Hate My Fucking Car Again

Now more than it has since at least the cold snap began on Thursday, when I pull to a stop my car has this hard thumping where the engine is, like it's shaking.  I thought it was the transmission, but I put 500 mL in it the past three days and this has come back.

Maybe it's the electrical.  Maybe the terminals need cleaning.  Maybe it's the engine.  Maybe it's the variable valves that need tuning.  All I know is that there's nothing lighting up on the console, and even though I was scared as shit going to and coming from the MRI job tonight, I got home in one piece.

But coming home in peace is a separate issue, and a mental state that has eluded me in this contraption ever since it started pissing oil by the ounce.  If it's going to be the leaks and then the power window and then the transmission and then the "second sound" (which, I have to be honest, has stopped since I poured a grand into rehabbing the engine) and now this ... even if it's cheaper than to make payments on a new car, the psychic pain of shoes continuing to drop is getting to me.  I remember My Father saying that he'll take the Mercedes-Benz SUV out of storage for me to use for the winter.  I'll be paying premium gas, but right now, I'll take it.

There's one saving grace: My folks are taking a road trip for two weeks.  That allows me to use their minivan, which has at least 10,000 more miles and yet now feels a lot safer than my car.  They'll understand while I put my car in their garage spot, right?  I had planned to wait till the next credit card billing cycle to fix the power window; now, I can get that done at any time, not just on the weekend, and hopefully they'll get to the bottom of this fucking pounding at stops, too.  Of course, if it's another engine repair that costs hundreds, well, fuck it.  Goodbye, my first car.

Man, I can't just get through life not worrying about a 19-year-old car, can I?

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