Expenses Without Receipt

OK, starting from Tuesday, June 16:

• Stopped by Caribou and re-familiarized myself with the barista I've known for years there.  Thank goodness she's still there.  Got my usual mocha and chocolate chip cookie.  With tip: $6.
• Had a lot of shiny new coins that I had not put away until that evening.  I may have used a few of them when I was transferring pants and was in need of coins to match purchases.  Wound up with four really shiny-looking and new quarters that I put into my new coin up: $1.
• Monday, June 15: Started my week-long furlough from work by finally working out for the first time in months.  Admission at the community center remains the same as it did when I started going there four years ago.  Man, when will they raise it?  Hopefully never: $3.
• ETA at 3:28 p.m. Friday, June 19 the beer I got at Nomad, where I watched a snippet of the Women's World Cup.  How could I forget this?  Glad that the games began at 4, which is the beginning of the pub's Happy Hour.  Rush River pale ale plus tip: $4.
• On Sunday the 14th I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition).  There I talked to the girl who was supposed to come over and clean my house but sent her niece to do it instead.  Well, turns out she's gotten into some, uh, money problems and is now willing to meet my price.  (Have I talked about this?  If I haven't, maybe I will.)  And she let me know she was willing to play after squeezing hard on my erection through my pants during our lapdance.  She even had this move where her fingers moved oh-so slightly up my shorts.  Man, if only my dick were, like, half a foot longer!  Her and tips: $26.
• Friday, June 12 -- After work I went over to ***a*'s place so she could suck my dick.  Still can't perform as well as I think I should.  It was hard for me to sustain my hardness, and once again my fantasy that she would blow me and I would just cum wasn't even close to being true.  I had to prime myself by stroking me own dick, then shoving it into her mouth and thrusting it, like what I was doing was a power move.  I'm such an asshole.  But that finally made me ejaculate, and into ***a*'s mouth, which is what I wanted all along.  She's an angel, letting me do that to her.  I should expound on that more: $120.
• That evening I was parent-free; they were taking care of their granddaughter/my niece and didn't know when they were coming home, so I heated up some fried rice and watched the United States Women's National Team tie with Sweden in the Women's World Cup.  They were still not home by the time I finished eating and the soccer match was over, so I thought I was free to go to Caffetto, where I had an apple pie and iced mocha.  Don't know why, however, since I was going to go to the Twin Cities Donut Crawl the next day and I should empty my stomach for as long a time period as possible.  And that is why I am so fat.  Plus tip: $9.
• Falter back to Tuesday the 9th, where I came back so late I decided to come home to dinner before filling up the gas tank in my car.  I thought I should just eat first, then go back out to quickly gas up.  When I told them that, they asked me to get lottery tickets.  Which further complicated things; I was just going to use this prepaid Visa card I got as "payment" for the gasoline, but by law you have to pay for lottery tickets with cash.  If I did that, I would violate my rule not to pay cash for anything on that day.  But I did: $5.
• As a corollary to that, if I did spend cash on one thing, I would have to spend cash on at least another thing.  Well, hell's bells then; the floodgates are open!  Well, they actually weren't.  But it was a hot day, so after I went to DQ for a Blizzard.  It was OK: $3.20.
• Oh, and the parents paid me back for the lottery tickets.  An Infusion of: $5.
• On Sunday, June 7 I wanted to catch Women's World Cup games at the Nomad, but even though they advertised it, the door was locked.  WTF?  So I had two choices: Go to the library and listen to the game while working on the blog, or go to a restaurant and watch.  Went to Digby's because I decided I wanted to see the game, which they changed a TV for me to see.  Happy Hour beer and chips, plus tip, comes out to: $7.74.
• After that I went to Dairy Queen.  However, using money that day was not in the plans.  I wanted to use the free DQ wooden nickel/coupon that I got that day that that sniveling little bitch didn't mind her manners.  I even searched through the pockets of my clothes to find it.  When I found it, I put it in my back pocket to use ... except that once I got to Dairy Queen, I looked all through my pockets and couldn't find it.  Turns out that for some damn reason I put that wooden nickel on my desk after I found it.  Well, I was craving a Blizzard, so I was going to get one with my own money: $3.20.
• Saturday, June 6 ... I guess it was kind of serendipitous that I was asked to come in for overtime at the test scoring place.  It is really close to the track; I mean, whereby it would be one hell of a trek to get to Canterbury Park, from where I worked it is only 20 minutes away, and the drive on a late Saturday afternoon made it a lot quicker.  And I had plenty of time to get there after my work day was done, so I had to go!  Let me admit that I did not want American Pharoah to win, but that may only be because I have grown to identify with not seeing a horse win the Triple Crown.  But I thought that biggest impediment to him winning the Belmont Stakes would be a huge field, and with only seven horses running, I kind of thought American Pharoah now had a chance.  And seeing him extend his lead in the stretch, he made it look easy, although I still can't help but think a better class of competition (and more competition) would have prevented him for winning.  Nevertheless, I bought a $2 souvenir ticket, just to say that I Was There ... at a satellite track far away from Belmont Park.  I bought two exacta tickets in the Belmont Stakes, both with American Pharoah finishing second.  Those two, obviously, lost, as well as a $5 trifecta what-the-hell ticket I purchased at a race at Canterbury that ran before the Belmont Stakes.  All in all: $15.
• This day was a busy day: I drove from Bloomington to Shakopee to St. Paul, when I though I didn't have to travel to the first two cities.  I was everywhere, man.  I went to St. Paul because a co-worker at the test scoring place invited all of out to an opera that she was appearing in.  Now, people who work there advertise their own things all the time.  I guess I went to this opera because I work as closely with her as you could at this job.  Plus, she was nice.  So was the opera, even though I am not a fan nor an expert at all.  The first time she sang, I was like, Whoa, how the hell can she do that?!  And I just sat back and listened the rest of the performances, beer in one hand, opera organization magnet tucked into my pocket.  With tip for the beer: $18.
• Well, since I was running around the entire Twin Cities, I might as well follow up St. Paul with Minneapolis.  First I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version) for tips only: $6.
• Then I went to My Favorite Late-Night Italian Place for some din-din.  With tip: $14.25.
• Wednesday, June 3: The last day before my parents came back, and I wanted to celebrate being able to go wherever the hell I want without them knowing by dropping by My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Edition) at night.  Tips and a dance with the veteran Savannah: $28.
• On Tuesday the 2nd I had to plan for a stripper cleaning my house, even though I didn't know which one it would be.  She would not be coming until 7, however, so I had time to wait for traffic to pass, so I went to Eden Prairie Center and hit up Pasta Zola.  It's a small mom-and-pop store, and I think it's still the only one of its kind.  Hope it's working out for them.  The food's good, but I like the story behind them more.  With tip it equals: $8.
• Paid the niece: $100.
• And then I went out to McDonald's to try their 1/3 pound burgers: $7.40.
• Sunday, May 31 ... went to the Twins game with my buddy.  Played the raffle at a sporting event, again, stupid me.  And since we got there about an hour before the game began, I elected to spread my wings a bit and not get a souvenir cup of the draft beer and got a can of a local craft, Bauhaus Wonderstuff.  Oh, and I got a cheese bratwurst instead of just a hot dog.  With tip for the beer and the purchase of a ticket, which we got legitimately, at the box office, the total becomes: $45.
• Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) in the evening, where I got set up by a stripper that kind of screwed me over.  She asked for a dance, and she seemed nice.  But once she stepped down from the stage she wanted me to pay for her shot.  Ripoff bitch.  And then she demanded I pay before I get my LD from her.  Ooh, I really don't like that.  She tried to chat me up, but once you disrespect me by hitting me up for money, you will never get a lapdance from me.  Ever again.  Lesson learned.  Plus tip: $35.
• I then went to Caffetto.  It was very hot that day, so even though it was cooler at night, it still was too humid for me to want hot coffee, or coffee in general.  So I got a Boylan orange juice.  Why?  Because Arby's has started selling it, and so I had Boylan on my mind.  Had a Boylan once; bought it at Caffetto too, because they have an extensive selection of what could be called small-label, "craft" pop.  Hit the spot.  With key lime pie and tip: $7.
• Saturday, May 30 was the night I decided to make a night out of it.  I primed my dick by seeing the hot waitresses at Hooters.  I have a receipt, but I just tried finding it and I can't find it, so I'll trust that put the right amount down.  With tip: $16.25.
• Then I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Cover Version).  Interesting night, to say the least.  Although I checked the schedule online and confirmed my All-Time Favorite was going to be there, she wasn't there.  Who was there was this drunken asshole who shoved my seat out of the way while I was enjoying myself stageside.  He seemed to have gotten kicked out, as well as another man.  First time I've ever seen two people get thrown out on the same night at this place.  Otherwise it was a fantastic time for the club, which was as packed as I've ever seen it.  Too bad the combination of new ATF and getting jumped by this bully turned this into a quiet, non-fun, and quick one for me.  Oh, and free food only whacks off two bucks in cover now.  But hey, at least I saved some money!  Plus Corona and stage tips: $44.
• On Friday the 29th I started my weekend going to this amateur wrestling bout upon an invitation from my friend, with whom I used to usher with.  Hadn't seen him in a long time.  Even though I have been to this place before (for another wrestling bout with another friend I used to usher with), I got lost and had to open up my 3G on my smart in order to find the place.  That I had to drive in a driving rainstorm didn't help matters.  In exchange for him getting me in for free, I paid for his dinner.  He got nachos and a Monster; I just settled for a slice of pizza.  With tip it came out to a very cheap: $10.
• I also got lost trying to get him home, but I finally did.  Wound down with a trip to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition) for tips and coffee: $11.
• Did the same thing the previous night, Thursday the 28th.  Was going to see a stripper-friend of mine host karaoke, and so I decided I would also try and see another stripper-friend of mine at this pizza place first.  Hadn't seen her in a while, so I thought to myself that if she is not there this night, she probably left the job.  Didn't see her; she left the job.  Went to the other place, 1029, to eat a second dinner of a Shack Burger with a Michelob Golden Draft.  With tip: $14.
• Go all the way back to Sunday, May 24 ... A busy day of leisure, starting off with going to Brit's Pub to see Championship Sunday in the English Premier League.  Had a great time going to the downtown pubs over the last month or so of the EPL; will try and do it again next year, and for a larger hunk of the season.  Sandwich and tip: $12.
• I then spent my afternoon at the Walker, taking in their International Pop exhibit.  For the past few weeks there they had a Christopher Nolan retrospective running.  Would have gone because my parents would not have been at home, but I was too busy from work and too tired after coming home from it.  Admission is: $9.
• Went out to dinner that night.  Used a coupon from Quizno's.  Seems as if Quizno's is pretty generous with the coupons.  It'd be the only way I could afford eating there.  With tip: $7.05.
• Made a night of it, too.  How often could I go out on a Sunday night when I have work the next day?  When can I do that with my parents at home?  Hell, who else besides me goes out on a Sunday night?  Went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition), where, once again, I was not asked for a drink.  That's happened more often lately.  I'm OK with it, though; saves me three bucks.  Money spent on tips and this relatively new stripper named Monroe.  The total comes to: $26.
• Finally ended the night tooling around at Caffetto.  Think I just had a mocha.  With tip: $5.
• On Saturday, May 23 I went to the semifinals of the Big Ten Baseball Tournament at Target Center.  It was the second time the tourney was played here.  The first time was 2013, the inaugural tournament.  I only had time to see the championship game, where Indiana beat Nebraska.  I doubt there were more than 200 people there.  This year, for both games, there were, maybe, more than 500 for the back-to-back double-header I got to watch.  Maybe the increased attendance is due to familiarity, that the B1G Tournament is back in Minneapolis for the second time in three years.  Or maybe it's because there were two games.  The teams playing were Indiana, Michigan, Maryland, and Illinois -- no school close by like Iowa, no school with a huge local alumni base like Nebraska.  So I don't know.  Enjoyed seeing two college baseball games for one ticket, so I splurged on a Dinger Dog (which I did not know was a footlong) and a souvenir-sized Pepsi.  It all adds up to a measly: $20.
• Glam Doll Donuts has late-night hours on the weekend.  Why?  I'm not criticizing it; I just have no problem how a donut shop that does not serve alcohol could make any business on the weekends.  And the location is problematic, too; on the one hand they have competition from bars and restaurants, and on the other hand they are stationed in what I consider to be the shady and underdeveloped side of Eat Street.  Is there business there?  On a lark -- and just in case this great place decides it has no business being open for business on weekends -- I went this Saturday night.  There were a few people, but I had no problem finding parking on the street, let's put it that way.  And like I usually do I load up on donuts; I eat a couple there (chasing them down with coffee), then bought a couple to go.  With tip it came out to an expensive: $13.
• Go back to Thursday the 21st, when I didn't originally plan on spending any money but had to because Father wanted me to print out directions around Copenhagen for their cruise.  So I went to the library to print out maps: $1.
• That evening I went to Buffalo Wild Wings at MOA.  I had a receipt for those online surveys that, once you complete it, get five dollars off.  I tried using it, but the waitress said that, basically, it has expired.  Funny; other BWW's took them just fine.  And then the waitress just walked away from me.  The fuck?  The "experience manager" saved my dinner for me, otherwise the combination of not being able to use the survey discount and that bitch's odd behavior would've meant a less-than-15% tip.  Oh, and now I can't find the receipt, so I have to list an amount I am pulling out of my ass.  Uh, let's go with: $16.
• Wednesday, May 20 -- printed out more Copenhagen maps at the library: 80 cents.
• Then I went to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Version).  Tips only; like being left alone: $8.
• Finally, go all the way back to Friday, May 15, where, to relax after my night part-time test project job, I went to Caffetto for a coffee and chocolate cake.  I am not quite certain if the amount is correct, but I'll just go with it.  With tip the total is: $8.

I am through to Tuesday, June 16.