Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop

In a call that I had with her last week, she said not to worry about a letter that I warned her about because she would be back home in time to deal with it herself.  And that is the first indication of when exactly my parents will be home, thus ending my freedom of them not being in my hair while at home.

The time my parents unexpectedly came home to a dirty house last winter has permanently scarred me and continues to haunt me.  I now "expect" them to come home at a time of their choosing without them telling me.  Nevertheless I am trying to figure out when they're coming home by going on their e-mail and checking if they have received an e-mail from, say, Spirit Airlines confirming their reservation and reviewing their itinerary.  I'm always scared that they are trying to blindside me so they'll delete it as soon as they see the e-mail.  That's why even if I don't see any messages like that, I still believe they got it and erased it.

The house is a shambles right now.  Haven't cleaned anything besides the two toilets even once since they packed up and left.  The place has gotten so dirty that I see dust bunnies in the halls.  Even I think that the house is too dirty now.  I need to have one of my stripper girlfriends come over and clean it.  But that also creates its own problems.

First of all, there really is only girl I know will do the job right and do it for a good value.  But I don't know what the hell has happened to ***e*.  She's in the wind and/or might have her nose buried in cocaine right now.  If that's the case, I don't want her anywhere close to the house.  But that leaves me with a bunch of women who have done a half-ass job or those that haven't been here before.

Also, while I want to get the house clean, I don't want to get it clean way before my parents come home.  If that's the case, it'll just get dirty again, and if they do surprise me, they'll just yell at me for not keeping the house clean, like they did last year.  And if I do ascertain when they come home and it's a lot later than a time where I hire a stripper to clean my house, well, I would have to pay her or another dancer to clean it again, and honestly, I am cheap enough where I will try and get the house cleaned up only once before my parents return.  That means I need to time the hell out of this.  And that's why I hope to Buddha that not only will I know what the date of their return home is, but also have enough time after I find out to hire someone to clean before they come home.  No use knowing the date if it's the next day, or the day after that.

I just know I'm going to get screwed by them.