Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: July 2022

I have gone back and forth ever since I first laid eyes on the month.  Not to say that's a bad thing -- far from it, it's pretty good.  Of the dozen women on this month, I'd say about half a dozen are notable, and I'm still not firm as to which six.  But it's getting late in the month and I should spit this out and I can't think of anything else I want to blog post about, so I will make my decision now.

I will name six, and I will rank them in ascending order.

In sixth place is Trinity, out of Odessa, Fla.  Long, straight, light brown hair.  What gets me is her get-up: It's a blue two-piece bikini, but the top is one of those things where both sides of the top are connected only by two horizontal strings that frame the cleavage.  I don't remember the last time I've seen such a unique top.

In fifth place is Aubrey, from Sarasota, Fla.  Long, straight, blonde hair, and a white two-piece.  I love the vertical ridge down her cleavage to her navel.  A sign of strength!

In fourth place is Madison, hailing from Knoxville, Tenn.  Long, blonde hair, a red two-piece bikini whose top is, uh, kind of zany.  From her proportions it looks like she's a tiny girl, but that makes her body bangin'.

In third place is Lindsay, out of Merrillville, Ind.  I have really gone back and forth with her.  I didn't initially have her as a waitress I wanted to cite.  After all, even though she has long brown hair and is wearing a blue two-piece, she's posed on the side, and nondescriptly at that.  But I'm looking at the background of her photograph.  The Hooters logo looms behind her.  The scenery could be anything, I know that, but my horny mind wants to think that she is posing at the restaurant she works at in Merrillville, Ind.  Could be out in the patio, or it could be in the inside of a mall, like the Hooters at the Mall Of America.  I just get this kinky kick that a Hooters girl dresses down to a swimsuit and takes photos at the place she works at and perverted heterosexual males like me would love to eat!

In second place is Tayler, from Sugarland, Tex.  Long, straight, dark brown hair, and her two-piece bikini is pattered with white stars on a blue background, also known as the canton part on the American flag.  I'll be honest: She's not smiling, and that bothers me quite a bit.  But goddamn, look at her body -- long, slim, got that vertical ridge showing strength, built like a fucking greyhound, a sexy one!  She's ... my word, she's fit!

Finally, in first place ... I give it to The Main Girl, Blakelyn, hailing from Jacksonville.  Brown hair that ends at her shoulders, and she's wearing a two-piece that's red, white and blue but is not American flag-themed.  That her picture is the biggest one of the dozen on here is a major boost: She is one of the few on this page who fully faces the camera, so we see her delectable body in all her glory.  She's thigh-deep in a pool, and she's splashing the water for effect.  But sexiest of all to me?  She's smiling in this photo.  Yep, I'm acting like a male chauvinist when I say that, but her smile puts her over the top!

So, congratulations to Blakelyn, and to all the other hot women I've pointed out.  I've masturbated to all of you already, but I think I have interest for one more squirt before I fully turn the page on all of you!