Vexed By The Pushy And By The Slow

Alright, another instance where I hate myself.

So I was at the United FC Match Saturday night.  And goddammit, like last time, I had lost my temper by some skeetering prick pushing and slaloming his way past me and everybody else on his way to God knows where.  And just like last time, I took it upon myself to catch up to him in order to ... well, just like last time, I don't know, I don't fucking know.  So armed with pissed-off energy, I slalomed and pushed my way past people in order to catchup to this short motherfucker, who, thankfully, was going into the MNUFC store, just like me.  I finally caught up to him on the line going into the store.  And now that I was the dog who finally caught the car, the only thing I thought to do let this asshole know I got him was ... fan him with my program.  That's all I could come up with.  Now I was smart enough to stop after we got in to the store.  Well, maybe I stopped after we walked in a few steps.  Or several.

Affter I "accomplished my mission," and went to grab a beer, however, there was another goddamn pissant pushing his way past the crowd.  This is a tall (and probably Mediocre) White Guy who didn't have manners because he didn't he had to mind his.  So this red fucking mist descended on me again.  This piece of shit I failed to catch; he was too tall before he dove into the men's room.  But in trying to catch up with this pushy fucker, I got held back by a few slowpokes, and this time around, they really, really pissed me off.  In particular there were these two big dudes, one of whom I remember being dressed in a Portland Timbers jersey.  They were taking their time, talking to each other and walking very, very slowly -- slowly enough where I would have gone around them if I weren't fucking hellbent on revenge.  I was able to look around them, however, and I saw no one.  There was space in front of these two dudes for at least 15 feet.  And that angered me to no end.  Couldn't they see they're blocking up the concourse for everyone else?!  Again, if I weren't trying to catch up to that pissfuck, I might have taken a more calm approach to getting around them.  But I was, so I literally shoved my way past them.  Rudely.  And frankly, for at least those two, I'm glad I did.

Saturday night was a reminder that I'm no good around crowds.  People walk too slowly, so I push my way past them.  People walk too fast, and I take it upon myself to passive-aggressively extract my vengeance upon them.  Later on my walk to grab a beer, I ran into a group of people, all talking to each other, who may or may not have been in line, and I fucking hate those people too.  And like before, I would have dealt with that situation better if I weren't so pissed off in the first place.  I probably went around them, but it was possible I cut in front of them, if they were in line.

Looking back, I don't like how I acted.  But I lose my temper when I see unmannered people like that.  So maybe I should just get to the stadium, get food, get my beer, and then just go up to my seat.  But there are just so many people coming out to the Match that I'll still see asshole pushing his way through, and I'll just have to be a sheepdog and try and fucking hunt him down because I can't help myself.