Driving down 35W to get to the Megamall to buy some stuff. I underestimate the traffic going south. I'm stuck behind a huge semi two cars away from me. And for some reason this fucking lane isn't moving at all. I had a chance to move to the one to the left of me, but I didn't because then I'd be behind this Coke truck. So I think I should wait it out till the center lane moves again. Which it never does.
Fuck it, I tell myself, and I change lanes. Now I'm obsessed with the Coke truck. Where is it? It's now a dozen cars ahead of me. It was dusting me, for fuck's sake. The culprit wasn't the semi but some really short woman driving a really slow black sedan two cars behind it. While I was marvelling this woman's poofy hat, the car behind me suddenly stops. And now I'm not moving again. It was the opening scene to Office Space.
And that was how it was all the way down the Megamall. As soon as I switched lanes I was surrounded by a convoy of cars driving at O.J. speed. They were braking like they were imagining squirrels running onto the highway. Meanwhile this truck has made its way onto the horizon. It was fucking gone, and I still don't know how that could happen.
I was so pissed I played cat-and-mouse with this blue sedan that wanted to merge onto my long, backed-up lane that leads into the MOA parking lot. I spaced out and gave him some space, but luckily the light was turning yellow and I took advantage of his hesitation to close the gap.
My God, why is everybody fucking here? My theory: People are more enthusiastic about shopping for themselves after Christmas than for other people for Christmas.
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