Finally, My Fucking Father Speaks To Me ...

... and it was about what I'm supposed to fucking doing with my life.

When I got home Mother asked me to start my parents' minivan for her.  After getting visual confirmation of two and not three plates on the dinner table, I knew that tonight I was eating dinner with just My Fucking Father -- perfect time for him to break his silence and come after me.

And he did.  He buttered me up with pork chops and rotini, and then he asked me, "Are you still a temp?"

I've been hiding the fact that I'm dropping off the car at The Mechanic Around The Corner the past couple days (might talk about it in the next blog post), and I needed to make sure that they don't know that I have reapplied for unemployment (I was lucky that a letter from the state came today and that I was the one who got the mail, and not them; timed it just right!), so I had to tell the truth on this one.  And so he assailed me yet again with bullshit about getting a stable job, not settling for temp jobs, blah-blah-blah.

Then he got fucking unfair.  He points out that after I eat I take a shower and sleep.  He accuses me of not looking for jobs every night.  I don't, but I thought he'd be happy with the showering and sleeping.  I do the former once a night -- OK, that's a lie, I skipped it last night -- and I do the latter at an hour that should be more to his fucking liking.  He's always hated me for staying up late, and now he's yelling at me for going to bed early??  Why can't he make up his fucking mind?!?!

The job stuff I still can't answer to his satisfaction, and not really to mine, and after he went back to harping on me for that I was done with dinner, and so he knew I was just going to stomp out of the dining room.  And he stopped talking.  And I immediately took a shower.  In order to continue avoiding him I decided to shave after my shower, just to stall for more time away from him.  Thought I heard the TV still on in the dining room, which made me think he was waiting for me to come out so he could sit me down and give me an ultimatum: Find a full-time job, go back to school, or leave the house.  But he didn't, thankfully.

But My Fucking Father has broken his silence and will now assail me about my future whenever he wants.  That isn't different from how it's been before, but it was different up till now, when he wouldn't speak to me at all.  I wish he would go back to shutting the fuck up.