OK, Friday is my last day. Was told explicitly from my boss in an impromptu meeting yesterday afternoon. Turns out that this is the point where they could afford to let me and the male of The Two go. Well, I shouldn't say "afford": I guess my boss feels that although there is plenty of other stuff we could stick around for, we are about to get done with most of the really important stuff -- in fact the stuff that only I can do -- and he has a budget that he needs to hew to, and so he thinks he could not justify keeping us past this point.
Frankly, I'm shocked. I really, really thought I'd be able to go until test scoring season goes into full bloom, and even though there is a project next month, I really assumed that I could just name the date I get to leave the place, like I basically did last year. Moreover, I'm depressed -- not just over losing my job and the paycheck that goes with it, but the routine of having something to do and somewhere to go every day. Even though there were times I didn't want to go to work, I would rather have work that not have it ... assuming unemployment isn't an option, and with my parents home it's not. Which gets me even more depressed because now I'll have to work out how I'm going to avoid telling my parents that I don't have a job for the next two weeks. That means keeping up the charade of fucking getting up in the morning, and trying to hide any unemployment information that might come. There are just so many disruptions that come with losing your job; even though I would resent being lashed to career where you're required to show up, finding a new way to make a living sucks.
But really I'm not concerned about being out of work now because I'm really concerned about my car and dying in it because it stalls out. I'll probably ruminate on this more later.
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