Mmmm, Orange Piss!

This is my last week of having health insurance through the state.  It's been great for me.  First I paid nothing for it, lately I've paid $16 a month for it, and in return I can go to my doctor and the U. for my teeth, and I don't have to pay any co-pays.  It's been glorious.

Starting on Wednesday I believe it has started to burn when I pee.  I think it was a combination of wearing too-tight jeans and not showering.  But after five days of this, combined with an unsubstantiated fear that putting this off my cost me more money in the long run, combined with wanting to use my current insurance one more time before I have to start paying more (way more) through my workplace, I did a spur-of-the-moment thing and went to my doctor less than two hours before my appointment.

I explained my predicament when I made the appointment, so when I got there I was swiftly given a cup to piss in.  And just as my doctor examined my penis and testicles for bumps, the tests from the pee sample were back.  That's quick.

There is nothing serious going on, at least he didn't think so.  No Urinary Tract Infection, no diabetes, no blood indicating I'm bleeding internally.  He just thinks my urethra has gotten a little irritated.  So, to combat this, he got me a prescription of pills that'll last me three or four days.  If the burning sensation isn't gone by the end of the week, he said, come back.

The medication is phenazopyridine.  I'm supposed to take three pills each day, and it's an analgesic.  But there is a pronounced side effect emanating from the ingestion of these pills that cause two gnarly things to happen.  One is that my piss is supposed to turn orange.  It's an indication that I am absorbing these pills, but ... damn, orange piss?!

The other side effect actually sounds scarier.  It says right on the bottle, and I quote, "Soft contact lenses may become permanently discolored by this medicine."  What the fuck?!  Now, I don't wear contact lenses at all, but if something I'm taking is able to do that to a non-permanent tool that is in some way connected to my body, and that connection is some distance away from the mouth, shit, maybe I shouldn't be taking it.  Jus' sayin'.

Oh, and it's possible phenazopyridine is a carcinogen.  Whatevs, as long as it stops my burning piss.