Today is the last day in the life of Herberger's. Didn't think it was, but it is.
I last checked into Herberger's last weekend, after I had stopped by the week before and made a mental list of things I wanted and needed. But even after spending all that much time browsing I decided to hold off and wait to see if I could get a better deal. I mean, there was a suitcoat that cost $425. Even at 70% off, I still would have paid around $127.50 -- extraordinary bargain for a coat of that price, but I still couldn't afford it. And since I hadn't seen prices dip when going into Herberger's before, I thought I had time to time out the bargains, and then swoop in when Herberger's finally throws in the towel and discounts everything, like 90% off. Then I would get that suit, and that shirt, and that Sinatra-style hat, and that ...
Herberger's had a countdown. As of last weekend there were 12 days left. So I had time.
No, I didn't.
After work yesterday/Saturday I went to Herberger's to see if my risk of not buying anything the weekend before backfired on me. And the answer is, Hell yes, it backfired on me! The money-conscious, price-pinching vultures that are people picked through all the good items on sale. There were still things on sale, but it was shit I didn't need. All the clothing there were ill-fitting ones, for men of grotesque proportions; I think I found pants that were 50x32 and 29x40. And what would I need pillows for?
Meanwhile, all the things I would have bought were long gone. The suitcoats I zoomed in on as both fitting and fashionable were nowhere to be found. (There were two suitcoats left, and both of them were too big for me.) The Sinatra-styled hats disappeared too; the only ones that even looked that stylish were brown, and they were all too big for my head. So I gambled that I would be able to come back this weekend and get the things I wanted for a slightly lower price than the weekend prior, and I lost. I wanted to buy something, anything, at Herberger's, only to commemorate its death in a rapidly deteriorating shopping industry (and, if I may say, shopping mall -- I should blog post about this soon). I had the wherewithal to buy pants about a month ago in case a situation like this happened; it looks like those are the only items/mementos I will buy there. I could swing back by today/Sunday, but there's nothing for me there to buy, and besides, I think it's going to feel really weird and sad to shop there.
I guess last workweek, one where my calendar was full of hermetically sealing myself (Monday), taking in two movies (Tuesday), seeing Da Beauty League championship game (Wednesday), attending the first day of the State Fair (Thursday) and watching college volleyball matches downtown (Friday), was the one where the cash-strapped common people decided it was time to buy. Yes, I ran the risk and I knew it. But let me state for the record that I was screwed in a way. You see, Herberger's put up a sign counting down the days until they would close up shop for good. When I walked out the door last Sunday, they were at 12 days. And I swear, when I walked back in yesterday/Saturday), it was down to 3 days. How in the fuck do nine days come off in a matter of a week?! Unless this is new math, 12-6 does not equal 3. I think that if Herberger's stuck to its original closing date, whereby they would die on the 31st of August instead of (I think) Monday, the suitcoats and pants I had my eye on would still be there, and then I would decide it was time to whip out the credit card and take them. But they moved up their death date, and my prized wish list items were spirited away.
And all that's left are weird clothing and the weird people who are about to suck all the marrow out of a virtually dead clothing store by buying that weird clothing at 80% off.
Oh, and by the way: RIP, Herberger's.
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