Kind of waited before getting the jersey ... just because. But as I waited, the selection of sizes dwindled. When I finally decided to buy it, I had two choices: Extra Small and Small. Before that, when I checked the Nike website, they had Medium, but no Large. When I saw that S was all that was left, I was at first scared I couldn't buy it. But then I checked the two USWNT jerseys I do have, which I bought during the 2019 WWC (which had three stars) and, I think, shortly after the 2015 WWC (which had two). The '19 shirt was a Medium, but the '15 was a Small. And I fit in both, and with little trouble. By the way, I can tell the S is smaller than the M, but the difference is slight. Nike makes a good product, IMHO.
I put both of these on and strode up to my bedroom mirror. Neither jersey suffocated me, but they are both tight around my stomach -- my fat stomach. Yeah, whenever I walk around in these shirts, I'm reminded again about how everyone can see the bulge in my gut. And this is where I lament again about how skinny I was in my childhood and into my twenties. Seriously, when I got to college, I was between 115 and 125 pounds. And I was there for a long time despite the different diets I decided to fall back on once I was out on my own, in both Los Angeles and later in El Paso. And yet, at some point 20 years or so ago, the metabolism that kept my body rockin' like a furnace broke. One day not too long ago I was rifling through old photos of myself (I don't remember if I was on my phone, I was online on Facebook, or I was looking through literal pictures I had in my hand). I can date back to about a decade ago photos where the big belly I have now was quite visible then, so I've been fat and out-of-shape for at least a decade.
I wonder when it all went wrong. I sometimes wonder how it all went wrong. Was it because of the depression I went through in my twenties, when the lack of a full-time job and direction finally compelled me to eat so much my metabolism quit? (I think my depression was a main reason I started Wailing And Failing.) Did it coincide with Grandmother's mental deterioration? Or is this all natural, and that I have eaten and drank as much as I wanted when I was a kid but my body no longer can just use it at a rate where my body doesn't look like I eat and drink a whole lot?
At any rate, I am fat and I look fat, and these now three USWNT jerseys really emphasize my fat belly. But hey, I wanted to commemorate the team winning its fourth title, so I stuck to my principle of buying the USWNT shirt on the Year of a Women's World Cup if they won the previous Women's World Cup. In other words, if what I think will happen happens, I won't be buying no jersey in 2027. At any rate, since both the Medium and Small bring out my gut, I saw no reason why I shouldn't buy the Small. It fits me, plus the only real reason I would buy a Medium is if it would hide my stomach, and if the M I do have is any indication, I don't think it will. So I bought the Small, and I will wear it at least to the 4 a.m. Women's World Cup Final, featuring or not featuring the United States, and I will stick out my fat belly for all to see!
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