Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: July 2023

It may be because I don't have it displayed on my wall because my parents are home, but as I have just taken it out to look at the month, it's not a great month.  I do have several favorites, even though I think that if I were doing this tomorrow night, I might change my mind.  In any event:

In fourth place is Ari, out of Loveland, Colo.  For the month of July, surprisingly, she is one of only two babes sporting American flag-themed swimsuits.  She's also wearing a cowboy hat, the most secure province of trashiness, even though it is a branded with the Hooters logo.  She's doing the thing where she's tugging the string in the middle of her bikini top that holds both sides of her top together.

In fourth place is Caitlin, hailing from North Tampa, Fla.  It is rare for me to recognize a Hooters waitress wearing a one-piece bikini.  But she's gorgeous, has got great wavy brown hair, and unlike most of the other girls in the month, she's smiling.  That stands out for me in July '23.  Oh, and she has her hands on her hips in her photo; I like that sign of domination.

In second place is Caroline, representing Mesa, Ariz.  Long, black hair, wearing a solid blue two-piece.  Like how her right arm is sitting on top of her head.  I love her milky white skin.  Only drawback: Her mouth is muted, like she's trying too hard to come off as indifferent.  No matter; all her other features significantly cancel that out.

Finally, in first place is Brandi, of San Marcos, Calif.  Luscious long, wavy blonde hair.  Blue bikini top, and she's the other woman here commemorating the 4th of July by sporting an Americana-themed bottom.  She's got a nice body, but I love her coy smile.

Congratulations to those four, and I will masturbate to them at some point.  But I want to point out one other Hooters waitress.  She is Madeline, of Tucson, Ariz.  I would have recognized her; this dark-haired beauty is wearing a red two-piece bikini that has all these straps that wrap around her hot torso.  But I noticed a black ribbon on the lower-right corner of her picture.  A black ribbon?  This is unbelievable, but it appears as though Madeline died July 26 of last year.  Her Instagram leads to a GoFundMe for her funeral services, and there is a Facebook post on the Arizona Hooters page from September commemorating her.  So apparently she posed for the calendar (I'm guessing around the holidays spanning 2021 and 2022) and she died about half a year later, either through sudden illness or an accident, and Hooters is honoring her with a photo with the black ribbon.  Damn -- such youth, and gorgeous youth at that, taken way before her time.  Life is so unfair sometimes.