So the first party was a big, albeit expensive, hit. Of the three girls, I shied away from ***i because she was really popular and ******e said that she heard that ***i doesn't put out. So between ******e and ******e, I couldn't decide which, so I asked if those two close friends could do a threesome with me for $160. And they said yes!!! So I got my dick sucked by two girls in the same session for the first time in my life, score!!! And I came, hard. After we all got done, I realized that getting $100 from $200 in a pair of $50's meant that if I gave $160 two ways, one of them would be $20 short. So I threw in another $20 to spend a total of $180. Fair enough.
Tonight I'm going to another party, and this time I plan on fucking ******s, the host. I was planning on going to the Gopher baseball game tonight; they have a big series against Indiana in a matchup between the two best teams in the Big Ten. But then ******s sexted me a picture of her big ass, and I got so worked up that I now feel obligated to go to her place and fuck the shit out of her ... after I slap and bite that ass she showed me. (Aside: She sexted me during the day, while I was at work. And my phone was face-up and in a place on my desk where somebody probably could see it if she or he was walking by my desk at the right time. I hope to God no one saw that.)
With a pair of parties only two days apart, I think I have blown all the money I made this week. Eh, it's worth it.
Friday, May 4, 2018
Thursday, May 3, 2018
Hottest Babe In The Hooters Calendar: April
I'll make this short because April was the first month where my parents were home the entire month and thus the Hooters calendar was hidden in my nightstand the whole month. Runners-up include Belinda, Cailey and the piercing blue eyes of Amanda. But for April I have to go with the big picture and Mia Ahles of Baton Rouge, La. She is showing the skimpiest pair of bottoms yet, but it's not saying much; it's one of those heart-shaped bottoms, so it's not showing a whole lot of ass. But I'll still take it!
Wednesday, May 2, 2018
Back On The Prowl; Admission/Confession
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Tuesday, May 1, 2018
The House Is Leaking More Than The Trump Administration
It may just be me, but ever since the weather finally turned warmer, I have heard a lot drip-drip-dripping inside the house. Whenever someone turns on a faucet anywhere in the house, you can hear sounds coming from inside the walls, and it's everywhere. The copper pipes in this house are leaking badly. I fear that if this keeps up, we'll see discolored areas in the ceiling and walls and, eventually, wet spots and puddles in places that shouldn't have them. Well, no place in the house should have wet spots and puddles, but still.
Father said that at some point he'll have all the copper piping in the house replaced. That's a great idea. Want to know how that'll work, for one, and for two, I want to know when that'll happen. Maybe we should all take a vacation then.
Father said that at some point he'll have all the copper piping in the house replaced. That's a great idea. Want to know how that'll work, for one, and for two, I want to know when that'll happen. Maybe we should all take a vacation then.
Monday, April 30, 2018
The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey
#0: Gopher softball (Last Week: -1). Let us begin this WMNSS by giving some overdue praise to the softball team. They are in the middle of a 12-game winning streak after sweeping both halves of a Wednesday Doubleheader at Cowles vs. Wisconsin (both of which ended via Mercy Rule), and then -- and I have to say, this is extremely impressive -- not only sweeping Purdue, not only sweeping Purdue on the road, but not allowing a run in all three games this weekend. The total score for the series was 20-0, and you can say that Friday's 9-0, five-Inning beatdown set the tone. One phenomenal performance to point out: Amber Fiser tossed a Perfect Game vs. the Boilermakers on Friday, needing only 45 Pitches in a 9-0, Five-Inning ass-kicking. For that, she was named Big Ten Pitcher Of The Week for the third-straight week.
The only thing tempering my enthusiasm for this club is its record. The Gophers are a blistering 15-3 in the Big Ten, but only 17-11 out of conference play. That disparity, or contradiction, gives me bad flashbacks to last year, where they were arguably the best team at the end of the regular season but didn't even get a Regional, and in turn rewarded the NCAA's assessment that they weren't that good by losing to Alabama. I'm not quite sure that these players will even make the NCAA Tournament, as unbelievable as that sounds. But they are doing the one thing they need to do, and that is win.
This, believe it or not, is the last week of the regular season for the U. (I don't believe it because spring has just sprung.) They play a DH vs. North Dakota St. tomorrow/Tuesday, then play three against Penn St. All five games are at home; I think I'll try and catch Sunday's finale.
#-1: United FC (Last Week: -5). I really don't think I've seen two separate Games on the same day. I did see a Tripleheader of college baseball games a month ago at Das Bank v.2.0, but that was in the same venue. Going from Target Field to Das Bank v.1.0 to see a baseball game and then a soccer match? I don't think so. But the fact that both of my teams won is fantastic. I was hoping for a split and expecting a pair of losses, but the best possible outcome actually happened!
Yeah, the Loons won, despite Ethan Finlay matching Kevin Molino for ACL tears that have ended his season as well. (Could it be the FieldTurf at TCF Bank Stadium?) A depleted, chemistry-less side took to the field against a Houston Dynamo team that isn't great but, because of the opposition, would roll over them. And once again, the Loons' Backline made a hash out of an oncoming Dynamo rush and resulted in a yet another Goal conceded early in the match.
But thank Buddha for Miguel Ibarra! His cross to Darwin Quintero in the box induced a handball, which Quintero deposited on the Penalty Kick to tie the game. And in the Second Half, Ibarra's cross in front of the net plinked off of either Ibson's or the defender's foot and to the far post for the game-winner. I'm shocked as shit that MNUFC won, 2-1, but they were able to break their losing streak at four.
Two bad things, however. First, Christian Ramirez had to be subbed out in the First Half because of a hamstring pull. His status is uncertain. (Once again I ask, could it be the FieldTurf at TCF Bank Stadium?) Second is something that chaps my hide. Sports Illustrated writers Grant Wahl and Brian Straus puts out an annual Major League Soccer Ambition Rankings report. The Loons come in 15th out of 23 clubs -- but that assessment comes with no input from the organization itself, because they were the only franchise in MLS that refused to answer the reporters' questionnaire -- several times, according to Wahl and Straus. Now why in the hell would you refuse to answer some good journalists' fair questions? You think you're too good for them? That really chaps my hide. I hate that as a man who studied journalism and hopes to one day get back into it, and I hate that as a season-ticketholder who has a stake in the future of this franchise. I think I'm entitled to some transparency, and I think the reporters deserved some answers. I do not like this.
#-2: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). Sports fans who want a local club to root for -- besides the Lynx, who started Training Camp yesterday and won't be covered by the WMNSS because they won the WNBA championship last year and won't need me pestering the shit out of them for at least one year -- should look to the Gopher Male Nine. They are moving up the Top 25 polls -- 22nd in Baseball America, 20 in D1Baseball.com -- after tripling up South Dakota St., 6-2, at Siebert on Wednesday and then taking two-of-three at Ohio St. over the weekend. It could have -- should have -- been a sweep. On Sunday's finale the U. was leading 5-3 heading into the Ninth Inning. But the Buckeyes scored three to pull out the victory. The last two Runs were scored when OSU's Dillon Dingler ran into Gophers First Baseman Cole McDevitt, popping the ball (which was thrown from between the mound and Home Plate) out of McDevitt's glove. Those Runs were scored on an Error by McDevitt.
Be that as it may, the Gophers are still looking pretty good in reaching the NCAA Tournament. But this is a big week -- well, besides hosting Concordia-St. Paul tomorrow/Tuesday. The second-place Gophers take on the top team in the B1G, Indiana, for a three-game series at Siebert starting on Friday. Who could really help them is Pitcher Patrick Fredrickson; after pitching eight Innings to give Minnesota a 2-1 win on Saturday, he was named conference Freshman Of The Week for the third time this year.
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -4). Oh, you fuckers are doing it again. This club has yo-yoed from above .500 to 100 losses to reaching the Play-In Game in three years, but I didn't think they would go back in the toilet again. But that's where they might be going after dropping six-of-seven this screening week. They won only on Saturday, which, luckily for me, was the game I decided to go to. (I was downtown after watching soccer and there were a couple other things I wanted to do downtown and I was going to the United match afterward and if I saw this it would justify me not going to the bank and then to government center to get my tabs that day and thus using my credit card and being charged an extra four bucks to get them Thursday, there!) But after taking their annual wedgie from the Yankees in the Bronx (got swept all four matches), they dropped two-of-three from by far The Worst Team In Major League Baseball, the Cincinnati Reds, which won their first series of the season. Now they are not the worst team in baseball; the Twinks are, despite Saturday's victory breaking an eight-game losing streak.
There's just nothing. Pitching sucks. Bullpen really sucks; Fernando Rodney completed getting swept by serving up a three-Run Game-ender Thursday, and he put two on in the Ninth via Walks before finally inducing a pair of pop-outs to get the Save Saturday. And the lineup ain't hitting because Miguel Sano's still out and Byron Buxton has a hairline fracture in one of his toes. Look, it's a long season and we're technically not even in May yet. But it'd be nice if they found some mojo.
They have just begun a three-game series versus Toronto. They then go to Comiskey for four against the White Sox.
#-Infinity: Timberwolves (Last Week: -3). Yeah, the dancing thoughts in my head that these Woofie Dogs would make their firsr-round series versus Houston an actual series was ridiculous. The Rockets scored 50 points in the first half of Game 4 last Monday ... then scored 50 in the Third Quarter to let everybody know what's up in that game and that series. It was a similar story in Game 5, in that the game was close in the First Half, but Houston blew it wide open to start the second. And that, my friends, was that.
As I said at the start of the season, reaching the playoffs was the goal. The Timberwolves accomplished that. And with ostensibly young pieces Karl-Anthony Towns and Andrew Wiggins, the window for contending, at least in theory, is opening (by contrast, the playoff window for the Wild is closing, fast, and that means that the winter should be ruled on the hardwood for the foreseeable future). But the horizon looks cloudy and mighty low, to be honest with you. There are teams that have assembled the NBA version of the Avengers (Golden State, Houston). More notably, there are teams that no one gave a thought to winning the title this year that have legitimate chances to win, such as Boston, Toronto and, gulp, even Utah. (Aside: We all thought it would be the Warriors over Cleveland in this year's finals. This year should prove that no one knows what the future will bring. And on top of that, this year should prove that even with "Superteams," the NBA is quite capable of forming great teams in the season and thus surprising fans who despise predestined outcomes.)
But there is a pessimism that this squad, as currently constructed and coached, is nowhere close to contending. The Timberwolves are a contradiction: A young team out of step with the times. Not only are they shit on defense, but in a league where the three is the main (if not only) weapon of choice, these guys don't shoot threes and can't defend threes. Their chemistry before Jimmy Butler got hurt banked them enough wins for them to squeak into the postseason, but now you have to worry about extending his contract. And to be frank, neither Big KAT nor Big Wig broke through this year. You can say it's a chemistry issue -- maybe they deferred to Butler too much -- but you can also blame Tom Thibodeau for running those two, plus Jeff Teague and Taj Gibson, into the ground ... and, possibly, shortening their still-nascent careers.
You can be disappointed over what could have been. Remember, these guys were going to be the 3-seed about a month before the season was over. A five-game crash-and-burn lends credence to the thinking that this team could go south again, and it sure doesn't make them the next great superpower in the NBA. So what's next? Sign Butler? Get a long-distance shooter? Trade Wiggins? Dump Thibs? These are serious questions, and unfortunately, they're not being asked from a perspective of, "Oh, if we just do this, we'll win the title next year!" but instead it's one of, "How do we compete next year?" Those two perspectives bring different levels of enthusiasm for the future of this ballclub.
The only thing tempering my enthusiasm for this club is its record. The Gophers are a blistering 15-3 in the Big Ten, but only 17-11 out of conference play. That disparity, or contradiction, gives me bad flashbacks to last year, where they were arguably the best team at the end of the regular season but didn't even get a Regional, and in turn rewarded the NCAA's assessment that they weren't that good by losing to Alabama. I'm not quite sure that these players will even make the NCAA Tournament, as unbelievable as that sounds. But they are doing the one thing they need to do, and that is win.
This, believe it or not, is the last week of the regular season for the U. (I don't believe it because spring has just sprung.) They play a DH vs. North Dakota St. tomorrow/Tuesday, then play three against Penn St. All five games are at home; I think I'll try and catch Sunday's finale.
#-1: United FC (Last Week: -5). I really don't think I've seen two separate Games on the same day. I did see a Tripleheader of college baseball games a month ago at Das Bank v.2.0, but that was in the same venue. Going from Target Field to Das Bank v.1.0 to see a baseball game and then a soccer match? I don't think so. But the fact that both of my teams won is fantastic. I was hoping for a split and expecting a pair of losses, but the best possible outcome actually happened!
Yeah, the Loons won, despite Ethan Finlay matching Kevin Molino for ACL tears that have ended his season as well. (Could it be the FieldTurf at TCF Bank Stadium?) A depleted, chemistry-less side took to the field against a Houston Dynamo team that isn't great but, because of the opposition, would roll over them. And once again, the Loons' Backline made a hash out of an oncoming Dynamo rush and resulted in a yet another Goal conceded early in the match.
But thank Buddha for Miguel Ibarra! His cross to Darwin Quintero in the box induced a handball, which Quintero deposited on the Penalty Kick to tie the game. And in the Second Half, Ibarra's cross in front of the net plinked off of either Ibson's or the defender's foot and to the far post for the game-winner. I'm shocked as shit that MNUFC won, 2-1, but they were able to break their losing streak at four.
Two bad things, however. First, Christian Ramirez had to be subbed out in the First Half because of a hamstring pull. His status is uncertain. (Once again I ask, could it be the FieldTurf at TCF Bank Stadium?) Second is something that chaps my hide. Sports Illustrated writers Grant Wahl and Brian Straus puts out an annual Major League Soccer Ambition Rankings report. The Loons come in 15th out of 23 clubs -- but that assessment comes with no input from the organization itself, because they were the only franchise in MLS that refused to answer the reporters' questionnaire -- several times, according to Wahl and Straus. Now why in the hell would you refuse to answer some good journalists' fair questions? You think you're too good for them? That really chaps my hide. I hate that as a man who studied journalism and hopes to one day get back into it, and I hate that as a season-ticketholder who has a stake in the future of this franchise. I think I'm entitled to some transparency, and I think the reporters deserved some answers. I do not like this.
#-2: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -2). Sports fans who want a local club to root for -- besides the Lynx, who started Training Camp yesterday and won't be covered by the WMNSS because they won the WNBA championship last year and won't need me pestering the shit out of them for at least one year -- should look to the Gopher Male Nine. They are moving up the Top 25 polls -- 22nd in Baseball America, 20 in D1Baseball.com -- after tripling up South Dakota St., 6-2, at Siebert on Wednesday and then taking two-of-three at Ohio St. over the weekend. It could have -- should have -- been a sweep. On Sunday's finale the U. was leading 5-3 heading into the Ninth Inning. But the Buckeyes scored three to pull out the victory. The last two Runs were scored when OSU's Dillon Dingler ran into Gophers First Baseman Cole McDevitt, popping the ball (which was thrown from between the mound and Home Plate) out of McDevitt's glove. Those Runs were scored on an Error by McDevitt.
Be that as it may, the Gophers are still looking pretty good in reaching the NCAA Tournament. But this is a big week -- well, besides hosting Concordia-St. Paul tomorrow/Tuesday. The second-place Gophers take on the top team in the B1G, Indiana, for a three-game series at Siebert starting on Friday. Who could really help them is Pitcher Patrick Fredrickson; after pitching eight Innings to give Minnesota a 2-1 win on Saturday, he was named conference Freshman Of The Week for the third time this year.
#-3: Twins (Last Week: -4). Oh, you fuckers are doing it again. This club has yo-yoed from above .500 to 100 losses to reaching the Play-In Game in three years, but I didn't think they would go back in the toilet again. But that's where they might be going after dropping six-of-seven this screening week. They won only on Saturday, which, luckily for me, was the game I decided to go to. (I was downtown after watching soccer and there were a couple other things I wanted to do downtown and I was going to the United match afterward and if I saw this it would justify me not going to the bank and then to government center to get my tabs that day and thus using my credit card and being charged an extra four bucks to get them Thursday, there!) But after taking their annual wedgie from the Yankees in the Bronx (got swept all four matches), they dropped two-of-three from by far The Worst Team In Major League Baseball, the Cincinnati Reds, which won their first series of the season. Now they are not the worst team in baseball; the Twinks are, despite Saturday's victory breaking an eight-game losing streak.
There's just nothing. Pitching sucks. Bullpen really sucks; Fernando Rodney completed getting swept by serving up a three-Run Game-ender Thursday, and he put two on in the Ninth via Walks before finally inducing a pair of pop-outs to get the Save Saturday. And the lineup ain't hitting because Miguel Sano's still out and Byron Buxton has a hairline fracture in one of his toes. Look, it's a long season and we're technically not even in May yet. But it'd be nice if they found some mojo.
They have just begun a three-game series versus Toronto. They then go to Comiskey for four against the White Sox.
#-Infinity: Timberwolves (Last Week: -3). Yeah, the dancing thoughts in my head that these Woofie Dogs would make their firsr-round series versus Houston an actual series was ridiculous. The Rockets scored 50 points in the first half of Game 4 last Monday ... then scored 50 in the Third Quarter to let everybody know what's up in that game and that series. It was a similar story in Game 5, in that the game was close in the First Half, but Houston blew it wide open to start the second. And that, my friends, was that.
As I said at the start of the season, reaching the playoffs was the goal. The Timberwolves accomplished that. And with ostensibly young pieces Karl-Anthony Towns and Andrew Wiggins, the window for contending, at least in theory, is opening (by contrast, the playoff window for the Wild is closing, fast, and that means that the winter should be ruled on the hardwood for the foreseeable future). But the horizon looks cloudy and mighty low, to be honest with you. There are teams that have assembled the NBA version of the Avengers (Golden State, Houston). More notably, there are teams that no one gave a thought to winning the title this year that have legitimate chances to win, such as Boston, Toronto and, gulp, even Utah. (Aside: We all thought it would be the Warriors over Cleveland in this year's finals. This year should prove that no one knows what the future will bring. And on top of that, this year should prove that even with "Superteams," the NBA is quite capable of forming great teams in the season and thus surprising fans who despise predestined outcomes.)
But there is a pessimism that this squad, as currently constructed and coached, is nowhere close to contending. The Timberwolves are a contradiction: A young team out of step with the times. Not only are they shit on defense, but in a league where the three is the main (if not only) weapon of choice, these guys don't shoot threes and can't defend threes. Their chemistry before Jimmy Butler got hurt banked them enough wins for them to squeak into the postseason, but now you have to worry about extending his contract. And to be frank, neither Big KAT nor Big Wig broke through this year. You can say it's a chemistry issue -- maybe they deferred to Butler too much -- but you can also blame Tom Thibodeau for running those two, plus Jeff Teague and Taj Gibson, into the ground ... and, possibly, shortening their still-nascent careers.
You can be disappointed over what could have been. Remember, these guys were going to be the 3-seed about a month before the season was over. A five-game crash-and-burn lends credence to the thinking that this team could go south again, and it sure doesn't make them the next great superpower in the NBA. So what's next? Sign Butler? Get a long-distance shooter? Trade Wiggins? Dump Thibs? These are serious questions, and unfortunately, they're not being asked from a perspective of, "Oh, if we just do this, we'll win the title next year!" but instead it's one of, "How do we compete next year?" Those two perspectives bring different levels of enthusiasm for the future of this ballclub.
Sunday, April 29, 2018
The Thing About Deplorables/Republicans
Last/Saturday night was the White House Correspondents Dinner, and our dumbfuck President held a rally in Michigan because he needed zombies to kiss his ass so he would feel better about himself. So I want to write this because it's been percolating in my mind for awhile, even though I don't think my thoughts on it are fully formed. Really, though, trying to suss out just what the fuck happened in 2016 that led our country to ... this is something I won't ever completely understand, and I'm sure people whose jobs it is is to understand what happened will fail just as miserably. So even though this is just about a part of What Happened, I will say this anyway.
I have heard that some people think Donald Trump has been an utter failure. Well, he is in many ways, but I believe that the Republicans don't care because they needed a mouth-breather to rubber-stamp all the hateful, dreadful, racist, sexist, classist ideas they have successfully put into law in order to please the cis rich white men that give them money. What these people say is that we should be lucky that Donald Trump isn't more of an astute politician, such as, uh, Mike Pence or, ick, Dick Cheney. The thinking goes is that the Republicans would be able to slide anti-democratic policies past the American public so much easier if the loud, vile verbal diarrhea coming out of Trump's mouth right now was hidden under a patina of professional, political cool. People would be nodding their heads, and even smiling, while swallowing this Republican poison.
I'm not sure that's the case. It might appear at first glance that this is an argument of substance over style, but my argument is is that to these dumbshits, the style is the substance. Being loud and vile and openly misogynistic and anti-Semitic is what they want to be. It is becoming apparent to me, shocked though that I am, that there are a lot of racist assholes living in this country. And it's not enough just for someone who enacts laws that hurt non-white males. In fact, it's not enough to these pricks that our President hates non-white males as much as they do. It is extremely important to these prairie goons that our President says he hates non-white males as much as they do. These deplorables don't want to hide their hate. They want the freedom to spew their bigoted shit and not get called out for it. Fuck, they want to be applauded for it. They want to scream this garbage and have other deplorables say it back to them so they know they're not alone in this cruel world. That, in my opinion, is much of the reason why they voted for Trump: He is explicitly, and obviously, a man that is just like them, despite the fact that he, in so many ways, is not like them.
There is a scary subset of subhumans who will run into war with rubber spoons if Donald Trump tells them there are Muslims invading. The vicious combination of anger and openness is the one thing that animates and turns on these people. And so they won't like someone who plays it cool, even if that Republican guy (and it always has to be a guy) will sign bills that make non-cis, non-white, non-males just as oppressed as they appear to be now, from a hegemonic standpoint, under this Shitler as prez. It may be the case that this hypothetical Republican figure would make it easier to get such putrid laws passed. But putting aside my grander belief that Donald Trump pretty much represents Republicans and Republicanism, I don't think having someone from the same party will automatically keep these non-housebroken voters in a frenzied lockstep to vote Republican. If they get someone who couches his lying crap in euphemism and deft word-twisting and shit-eating grins, they'll just get confused, and they'll probably believe that such a candidate is a librul. No, they need a drunken, probably demented asshole who has no filter and opens his fat, disgusting mouth to unload whatever crazy, debasing bullshit that comes out of his shit mouth. There are Americans Living Among Us who hear Donald Trump and go, "FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and then head to the polls to vote for him and douchebags like him.
There are legitimate worries about the future of our democratic processes: Gerrymandering, voter suppression, Russian influence. But who I'm most afraid of are these people, these deplorable Republican sheep who will believe anything some crackpot says so long as he also says things that make them feel good about the people they hate. These brainwashed psychos scare the living shit out of me.
I have heard that some people think Donald Trump has been an utter failure. Well, he is in many ways, but I believe that the Republicans don't care because they needed a mouth-breather to rubber-stamp all the hateful, dreadful, racist, sexist, classist ideas they have successfully put into law in order to please the cis rich white men that give them money. What these people say is that we should be lucky that Donald Trump isn't more of an astute politician, such as, uh, Mike Pence or, ick, Dick Cheney. The thinking goes is that the Republicans would be able to slide anti-democratic policies past the American public so much easier if the loud, vile verbal diarrhea coming out of Trump's mouth right now was hidden under a patina of professional, political cool. People would be nodding their heads, and even smiling, while swallowing this Republican poison.
I'm not sure that's the case. It might appear at first glance that this is an argument of substance over style, but my argument is is that to these dumbshits, the style is the substance. Being loud and vile and openly misogynistic and anti-Semitic is what they want to be. It is becoming apparent to me, shocked though that I am, that there are a lot of racist assholes living in this country. And it's not enough just for someone who enacts laws that hurt non-white males. In fact, it's not enough to these pricks that our President hates non-white males as much as they do. It is extremely important to these prairie goons that our President says he hates non-white males as much as they do. These deplorables don't want to hide their hate. They want the freedom to spew their bigoted shit and not get called out for it. Fuck, they want to be applauded for it. They want to scream this garbage and have other deplorables say it back to them so they know they're not alone in this cruel world. That, in my opinion, is much of the reason why they voted for Trump: He is explicitly, and obviously, a man that is just like them, despite the fact that he, in so many ways, is not like them.
There is a scary subset of subhumans who will run into war with rubber spoons if Donald Trump tells them there are Muslims invading. The vicious combination of anger and openness is the one thing that animates and turns on these people. And so they won't like someone who plays it cool, even if that Republican guy (and it always has to be a guy) will sign bills that make non-cis, non-white, non-males just as oppressed as they appear to be now, from a hegemonic standpoint, under this Shitler as prez. It may be the case that this hypothetical Republican figure would make it easier to get such putrid laws passed. But putting aside my grander belief that Donald Trump pretty much represents Republicans and Republicanism, I don't think having someone from the same party will automatically keep these non-housebroken voters in a frenzied lockstep to vote Republican. If they get someone who couches his lying crap in euphemism and deft word-twisting and shit-eating grins, they'll just get confused, and they'll probably believe that such a candidate is a librul. No, they need a drunken, probably demented asshole who has no filter and opens his fat, disgusting mouth to unload whatever crazy, debasing bullshit that comes out of his shit mouth. There are Americans Living Among Us who hear Donald Trump and go, "FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and then head to the polls to vote for him and douchebags like him.
There are legitimate worries about the future of our democratic processes: Gerrymandering, voter suppression, Russian influence. But who I'm most afraid of are these people, these deplorable Republican sheep who will believe anything some crackpot says so long as he also says things that make them feel good about the people they hate. These brainwashed psychos scare the living shit out of me.
Saturday, April 28, 2018
The Fuck Did I Leave Work Early For?
So I need to get this off my chest. I had training for this new responsibility I have at work. (Don't know why I'm being trained if this is the last month at this job, but no matter.) Because the trainer and my co-trainee take only half-hour breaks, I decided that, for this one day, I would cut my lunch hour in half. That would mean that I was out of there at 4:30. That it was Friday, and that it was really nice out, made this a real good idea in my mind.
But then traffic came. There was a huge back-up from Cedar North onto Crosstown West. This was a lot more manageable during our prolonged winter, but I guess the sunshine means more people want to be out on the roads at the same time or something. Because of the huge back-up, I decided to take my alternate route home: Cedar all the way to 55, where I would take that West, then hop onto the 94 West exit.
Big mistake. There was a massive, half-hour back-up on the on-ramp from 55 West to 94 West. The increased bumper-to-bumper traffic, probably due to the nice weather, was a contributing factor. But I totally forgot that construction just began in that area around downtown and it's fucking everything up.
It took me 70 minutes to get home. That happened occasionally in past years, but not within the past, oh, two years. I really thought that since I would leave work at 4:30, I would get home at the decent time of 5:30, and since it hadn't taken an hour to get home in a long time, I thought I had a chance to come home at 5:15. But first I was foiled by needing to stay late because I ran into an issue with something I trained for, so I left at 4:45, not 4:30. Then all this shit happened, so I got home just before 6.
The worst thing about all of this is the flip-flopping I did to Mother. In the morning, because I thought I didn't think I could eat the banana Father gave me for lunch, I told her I'd be back at 6 or 6:30 so I could eat that banana just before coming home. Then, not only did I agree to a half-hour lunch break, I actually was able to eat a banana at work, so I texted Mother to say I'd be home an hour earlier. But at the back-up on the on-ramp it was obvious I wouldn't make it, so I texted her on the highway to say 5:45 instead. And when I still didn't get past this goddamn on-ramp I just told her that I thought there was an accident and that I'd be home by 6, which was just about the time I originally said I'd be home. I thought I needed more time to get home, then it turned out I thought I needed less, and then it turns out I needed more time after all. All because of stupid traffic.
I always said that the worst thing about working at the health insurance place was the commute. If this keeps up, I won't miss working there a bit.
But then traffic came. There was a huge back-up from Cedar North onto Crosstown West. This was a lot more manageable during our prolonged winter, but I guess the sunshine means more people want to be out on the roads at the same time or something. Because of the huge back-up, I decided to take my alternate route home: Cedar all the way to 55, where I would take that West, then hop onto the 94 West exit.
Big mistake. There was a massive, half-hour back-up on the on-ramp from 55 West to 94 West. The increased bumper-to-bumper traffic, probably due to the nice weather, was a contributing factor. But I totally forgot that construction just began in that area around downtown and it's fucking everything up.
It took me 70 minutes to get home. That happened occasionally in past years, but not within the past, oh, two years. I really thought that since I would leave work at 4:30, I would get home at the decent time of 5:30, and since it hadn't taken an hour to get home in a long time, I thought I had a chance to come home at 5:15. But first I was foiled by needing to stay late because I ran into an issue with something I trained for, so I left at 4:45, not 4:30. Then all this shit happened, so I got home just before 6.
The worst thing about all of this is the flip-flopping I did to Mother. In the morning, because I thought I didn't think I could eat the banana Father gave me for lunch, I told her I'd be back at 6 or 6:30 so I could eat that banana just before coming home. Then, not only did I agree to a half-hour lunch break, I actually was able to eat a banana at work, so I texted Mother to say I'd be home an hour earlier. But at the back-up on the on-ramp it was obvious I wouldn't make it, so I texted her on the highway to say 5:45 instead. And when I still didn't get past this goddamn on-ramp I just told her that I thought there was an accident and that I'd be home by 6, which was just about the time I originally said I'd be home. I thought I needed more time to get home, then it turned out I thought I needed less, and then it turns out I needed more time after all. All because of stupid traffic.
I always said that the worst thing about working at the health insurance place was the commute. If this keeps up, I won't miss working there a bit.
Friday, April 27, 2018
Thinking About Death Again
Lately, I don't know how long, I'm back to, just before falling asleep, catching myself before falling asleep and thinking, "What if I don't wake up?"
I've been thinking about death a lot lately. People around me -- not in my immediate circle, and not even an intermediate circle -- have died, and it's been affecting me a lot. First of all was the first stripper from My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition) to give me a handjob (well, squeeze my cock once really quick, and only after I badgered her into doing it). She died a year ago, and she died unexpectedly and in her sleep. I had not seen her in years, and our last interaction was her answering a question about her son on a Facebook status months before her death. But she was younger than me, and, well, young.
This week I was told by a hot Facebook friend that her friend, a Playboy Playmate who went by Nichole Van Croft in the magazine, died. She also died unexpectedly and in her sleep, at least as far as I know. She had been through some black days, but all the status updates indicate that she kicked those addictions and was living the good life. Most touching to me is that she personally replied to a couple of comments I left on a couple of her status update photos. I hope there is an autopsy so we know exactly what happened. Nichole died at the age of 44, only two years older than I. Regardless of how hard her life was, that is too young to die.
So with those blindside deaths before their time, I have been thinking a lot about my parents. They seem to be in great health, and yet I am deathly scared that one of them also will die in their sleep. It's been an encroaching menace in my life, and my folks aren't getting any younger. So I ... wonder, about them but also about me. I mean, I'm 42. I could fall asleep and not wake up, right?
In the meantime I should remember to text other family members just to see how they're doing.
I've been thinking about death a lot lately. People around me -- not in my immediate circle, and not even an intermediate circle -- have died, and it's been affecting me a lot. First of all was the first stripper from My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition) to give me a handjob (well, squeeze my cock once really quick, and only after I badgered her into doing it). She died a year ago, and she died unexpectedly and in her sleep. I had not seen her in years, and our last interaction was her answering a question about her son on a Facebook status months before her death. But she was younger than me, and, well, young.
This week I was told by a hot Facebook friend that her friend, a Playboy Playmate who went by Nichole Van Croft in the magazine, died. She also died unexpectedly and in her sleep, at least as far as I know. She had been through some black days, but all the status updates indicate that she kicked those addictions and was living the good life. Most touching to me is that she personally replied to a couple of comments I left on a couple of her status update photos. I hope there is an autopsy so we know exactly what happened. Nichole died at the age of 44, only two years older than I. Regardless of how hard her life was, that is too young to die.
So with those blindside deaths before their time, I have been thinking a lot about my parents. They seem to be in great health, and yet I am deathly scared that one of them also will die in their sleep. It's been an encroaching menace in my life, and my folks aren't getting any younger. So I ... wonder, about them but also about me. I mean, I'm 42. I could fall asleep and not wake up, right?
In the meantime I should remember to text other family members just to see how they're doing.
Thursday, April 26, 2018
Who Fucking Stole My Pop?
Yeah, most everybody has to deal with the perils of a communal workplace refrigerator, and I'm sure everybody has had their food and/or drink stolen at least once. It had not happened yet in my current position, though, and I felt like I was entitled to a sense of security. UNTIL YESTERDAY.
I had two bottles of pop in there, one Pepsi, one Coke. Per policy, I wrote my name on there, and even though one doesn't have to, I put the date on there too because I did that on other jobs and other workers at my company date their stuff. I thought that would be good enough for someone not to fuck with my stuff. I checked Tuesday; even though one bottle was left there for a few days and the other upwards of a week, they both were there, albeit pushed all the way to the back.
Fast-forward to yesterday/Wednesday. For the first time in a long time I got chili because Father gave me breadsticks he got from my parents' cruise. And you have to have a Coke with chili, right? I hadn't touched either pop in that fridge in a few days, but I assumed that they'd be safe because, hey, no one at work would be a thieving dick, right?
Grrrr ... I look in there and I don't see either bottle. I know which shelf it was; it was the tall one, in the middle, the only one where both bottles that tall could stand. I remember, explicitly, seeing them at the back of that shelf. And now they weren't there. I tried looking all around it. Maybe someone moved it to another shelf, or to one of the shelves connected to the door. I will admit that I haven't done a thorough search of the fridge. It's hard to do when there's a damn bundt cake right in front of everything. But I feel safe to declare that they're gone.
Again, just leaving stuff in a fridge that's shared by everyone is fraught with disaster, and yet I still feel pretty fucking violated. I followed the rules: If I wrote my name on it, it wouldn't be taken or thrown away. So where the fuck is it? And why the fuck did some prick steal it? Either it's because someone wanted to drink my half-empty bottle of pop, in which case, ew, or some overbearing nun of a co-worker saw the dates on my bottles, determined they were too old to stay in the fridge, and took it upon her- or himself to toss them. That line of thinking, if true, pisses me off. A bottle of half-drank Coke does not stink up a fridge, and even if it does, that does not give some cog in a company the right to throw away my stuff.
Obviously I can't do anything about it. Well, I did do something anyway. I embarrassed the shit out of myself by asking the cleaning lady before I left for the day if she throws shit in the fridge away. Like I thought, she said that she does not touch anything inside that appliance. Of course she doesn't; that's not her job, and in fact she would get in trouble if she even opened the door. Why in the fuck would I ask that stupid goddamn question besides to make an ass out of myself, humiliate her, and permanently rupture any superficial comity we had with each other when we crossed paths?
I can't just go around asking/accusing people of stealing my Coke. And, ultimately, it was one-third of Pepsi and two-thirds of Coke left to drink, so that's basically a full bottle ... uh, so I'm the equivalent of a full bottle, or two bucks. And yet I have to admit that this grinds my gears. Stuff was taken from me in the fridge by some asshole I work with, again. Un-fucking-believable.
Obviously I can't do anything about it. Well, I did do something anyway. I embarrassed the shit out of myself by asking the cleaning lady before I left for the day if she throws shit in the fridge away. Like I thought, she said that she does not touch anything inside that appliance. Of course she doesn't; that's not her job, and in fact she would get in trouble if she even opened the door. Why in the fuck would I ask that stupid goddamn question besides to make an ass out of myself, humiliate her, and permanently rupture any superficial comity we had with each other when we crossed paths?
I can't just go around asking/accusing people of stealing my Coke. And, ultimately, it was one-third of Pepsi and two-thirds of Coke left to drink, so that's basically a full bottle ... uh, so I'm the equivalent of a full bottle, or two bucks. And yet I have to admit that this grinds my gears. Stuff was taken from me in the fridge by some asshole I work with, again. Un-fucking-believable.
Wednesday, April 25, 2018
And There Goes My Job (Addendum To: So Am I In Or Am I Out?)
So before I left work Monday I asked my boss about the possibility of taking a vacation in May. I did not tell her I had already booked a flight to Denver. Yesterday (Tuesday) morning I got a reply from her. She said that there would be no impact from me taking a vacation in a month's time. They are not hurting for hands, so if I wanted to leave then, it wouldn't impact my department.
However ... she talked further about workflow, and my future there. Her intention is to keep me till the end of May/Memorial Weekend. But she said that some of the things I've been asked to do I won't need to do anymore, and she implied that if the work isn't there, I might not make the beginning of summer. She will have a further understanding of what else I can do by Friday.
And that already scares the shit out of me. I trust her, and take her assertion that she doesn't know how it's going to go for me yet at face value. But I have a bad feeling about where all of this is headed. I had said that I might not be around in two weeks, and when she said that, that became a definite possibility.
You know why? I don't have much else to do. On Monday, the mail basically knocked me out for the day. But that was Monday, when weekend mail piled up. There was much less on Tuesday. I had one other task I could do, but I could tell that if I worked at 100% it wouldn't last me till the end of yesterday, so I slow-played it (well, as much as I could in my open space). I indicated to my boss that this other task was all I got, and I don't know if it'll last me today until the mail comes in. And if the mail is fairly manageable today as well, then what do I do? And if there is nothing else, well, what am I doing there?
The anxiety of unemployment hit me like a hammer again yesterday. I was unfamiliar with it for so long, and yet once it smacked me I thought, "Oh, hello, old friend." I checked my accounts to see that I don't have as much money as I should. I've been thinking about checking the online want ads. I'm wondering if I can latch back onto the test scoring places this late into the season. I'm scared of not having a job and not having one lined up. And if I'm back out on the street, I can't get unemployment because my parents are here and they'll know that I'm back on the dole. (At least I can tell the county and state I'm unemployed again so I'll have free health insurance again.)
It's becoming tiresome to look for yet another job. Possibly the accomplishment, such as it is, I'm most proud of last year (besides seeing Grandmother before she died) is not getting unemployment even one week. It looks like that I may have to if I want to, you know, live. That's depressing, and humiliating, and I'm trying my hardest to forestall that fate.
So yeah, going to Denver next month is out ... unless the only job I can find is at the test scoring place and it starts in June. (Just as an aside, it would actually make more sense if I lose my current job sooner than later. That would open up the possibility that I would be able to catch onto a scoring project in time rather than be ineligible because it already started.) In the meantime, the job at this health insurance place that a co-worker of mine tried to hook me up with came open Monday. I had worries that this would not be the right fit for me, but right now, I'm so glad I applied for it this evening. And now I hope I get it and avoid the anxiety of trying to find and latch onto another job, another paycheck, another vine I have to swing to in order to, you know, live.
Things are just falling apart, again, and I'm scared, again.
However ... she talked further about workflow, and my future there. Her intention is to keep me till the end of May/Memorial Weekend. But she said that some of the things I've been asked to do I won't need to do anymore, and she implied that if the work isn't there, I might not make the beginning of summer. She will have a further understanding of what else I can do by Friday.
And that already scares the shit out of me. I trust her, and take her assertion that she doesn't know how it's going to go for me yet at face value. But I have a bad feeling about where all of this is headed. I had said that I might not be around in two weeks, and when she said that, that became a definite possibility.
You know why? I don't have much else to do. On Monday, the mail basically knocked me out for the day. But that was Monday, when weekend mail piled up. There was much less on Tuesday. I had one other task I could do, but I could tell that if I worked at 100% it wouldn't last me till the end of yesterday, so I slow-played it (well, as much as I could in my open space). I indicated to my boss that this other task was all I got, and I don't know if it'll last me today until the mail comes in. And if the mail is fairly manageable today as well, then what do I do? And if there is nothing else, well, what am I doing there?
The anxiety of unemployment hit me like a hammer again yesterday. I was unfamiliar with it for so long, and yet once it smacked me I thought, "Oh, hello, old friend." I checked my accounts to see that I don't have as much money as I should. I've been thinking about checking the online want ads. I'm wondering if I can latch back onto the test scoring places this late into the season. I'm scared of not having a job and not having one lined up. And if I'm back out on the street, I can't get unemployment because my parents are here and they'll know that I'm back on the dole. (At least I can tell the county and state I'm unemployed again so I'll have free health insurance again.)
It's becoming tiresome to look for yet another job. Possibly the accomplishment, such as it is, I'm most proud of last year (besides seeing Grandmother before she died) is not getting unemployment even one week. It looks like that I may have to if I want to, you know, live. That's depressing, and humiliating, and I'm trying my hardest to forestall that fate.
So yeah, going to Denver next month is out ... unless the only job I can find is at the test scoring place and it starts in June. (Just as an aside, it would actually make more sense if I lose my current job sooner than later. That would open up the possibility that I would be able to catch onto a scoring project in time rather than be ineligible because it already started.) In the meantime, the job at this health insurance place that a co-worker of mine tried to hook me up with came open Monday. I had worries that this would not be the right fit for me, but right now, I'm so glad I applied for it this evening. And now I hope I get it and avoid the anxiety of trying to find and latch onto another job, another paycheck, another vine I have to swing to in order to, you know, live.
Things are just falling apart, again, and I'm scared, again.
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