People Who Should Be Fired: That Bitch At That Other Coffeehouse

Oh, while I'm in the middle of The Worst Fucking Time Of My Life, I needed to take a break, post my Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey and breathe. I wanted to try a new coffeehouse this past Saturday, but I didn't have the foresight to check for addresses, so I found the Spyhouse on Nicollet, I place I've never been to, though I know where it was because I went to a party close by once.

I've commented before on the newer Spyhouse location, the one on Hennepin. In case you need a refresher, I hated the bitches who were condescending towards me, and I don't think I've been back there again. Assuming coffee prices don't change too much at the shops I frequent, I'll be able to keep my promise.

Anyway, so I went there and got as snotty a coffee cunt as I got over at Hennepin. No "hi," no "thanks," she didn't announce my change because I guess I can count, she just took my money and said, "I'll get that for ya." And when I asked for whip cream for my mocha, she said, "We don't have whip cream." Because Spyhouse is sophisticated like that. Shit, even the Hennepin location had it, even though I was warned I had to ask for it beforehand next time.

The kicker was when I had to get the security code for the place. There were three people standing in line, and so I decided to hold my temper and wait, and sidle up just as the first one was getting his order in. This bitch took a quick glance at me as she opened up her register and asked, nonchalantly, "Do you have a question?"

"I need the code," I said with, oh, 5% attitude. OK, 50%.

The code is, get this, "settledown." This fucker said it in such a way that she knew the irony of the code. It's as if she had the ability to mentally conjure up the code depending on how she felt about the customer. Why don't you settle down, bitch?

And this place was voted the best coffeehouse in the Twin Cities? Anyone care about customer service???