Went to work at the store today ... but again, I stalled by walking onto the quad. There actually were a lot of people and activities there. I don't think I remember seeing them last week, so this week, I guess, either freshman are acclimating themselves to college life or returning students just want to get the shit they need done out of the way. I was content on walking past all the U. booths peddling something, and I got a brochure from the College of Continuing Education. Maybe I'll finally go back to school, for real.

At 2, I call Father and tell him I'm coming in. He hems and haws a couple seconds, then tells me he's at the warehouse; go to the store and call. Well, I did, and somehow he actually was at the store, in the back. By the way, the store was completely closed when I came in; Father opened it up about five minutes after I came.

My job was not to haul stuff to the warehouse. My job was to mind the store, keeping it open, as he went around the neighborhood doing some things. Whether it be for the warehouse or one of his properties, I don't know. But I was left solo for most of the time. It's scary, and I don't think that should ever be done, but I had no trouble. In fact, there were three people who wanted to buy lottery tickets and only one couple who wanted to get some goods from the back of the store, which meant I had to call Father so he can come back and help them. Hell, I had this sudden attack of diarrhea, just after he left on an errand. I locked the front door, shut all the lights, and took a shit for about five minutes before coming back out. I don't think anyone came.

Actually, I was there for more than three hours and the people I described above were the only people who came. Logically, I still believe my parents could make a profit out of the store. But I really can see the point-of-view that it's so goddamn boring that it's not worth keeping open the store if a person comes in an average of once an hour.

Still, when I heard that I wouldn't have to haul boxes up on a truck or unload them onto a pallet, my reaction was relief. Whew! I don't have to bust my ass and break a sweat today. Just have to sit out front and read ... even though Father is moving a lot of stuff around the front of the store ... and there are cleaning products laying around ... and the huge rice pallet is missing in the corner of the store ... and it still looks like things are being taken away. But I still feel is relief, not even the sense of foreboding I had this time last night. So, because I am relieved, I can replace it with another emotion, a familiar one: guilt.

We'll see what happens tomorrow.