My Brother Remains An Unmitigated Fucking Asshole

So I'm home, and I'm so glad that trip to Hong Kong is over.  Got through Grandmother's cremation, for one.  The other turned out to be a disappointment: My brother remains an unmitigated fucking asshole.

Man, just thinking about how he treated me is triggering violent thoughts in me.  It's really hard to type this out.  But here goes.

It started before that motherfucker even touched down at the airport, texting that I was a dickhead out of the blue after I asked an innocent question he thought was stupid.  He does that all the time.  He always did that.  Either because of Grandmother or because he immediately went back to being an asshole again, I just out and out threatened to punch him the face if he called me a dickhead again.  Oh, and I called him an asshole.  He did call me a dickhead, and I didn't have the balls to go through with my promise and coldcock him, even though I had a couple chances once we got back to the hotel.  But in the back of my mind I knew that I couldn't show up to see Grandmother one final time with him having one black eye and one having one busted-up hand.  And I'm trying to think through this -- that no matter how My Asshole Brother bullies me, if I hit him, I can't come back from that, no matter how justified I feel.  So yes, I broke a promise, but I'm trying to believe that I did the right thing.

It continued after we got home from shopping after the cremation and dinner with the family.  Sister and I stayed up before we had dinner to go to, and I started philosophizing because I'm deep.  After that, and because I said something, My Asshole Brother says, "Oh, before I forget -- did you bring earplugs?"  That was a shot at me.  I, frankly, was taken aback.  It hurt me, it really did.  But I realize that deep musings are things that I always do, and I was having a conversation with my sister and not him, and she seemed fine with it, so, um, fuck him.

The worst thing, though, was the dinner.  My Asshole Brother becomes an entirely different person when he's a social situation.  With us he's a surly, sullen prick who only speaks in insults.  With my family (such as my sister's destination wedding), he turns into a loud, obnoxious motormouth who is always cracking really shitty jokes.  Oh, and he drinks too, a lot.  Seriously, he's a fucking drunk.  So's my uncle, I'm afraid.  Friday night they were trying to drink each other under the table.  Neither did, but they were plenty shit-faced.

When we said goodbye, my uncle was so drunk that he started walking behind My Asshole Brother up to our hotel room; his wife (my aunt) and his daughters (my cousins) had to coax him to walk back the other way to their place.  That's when I mentioned to my sis, "He seems to be half in the damn bag."  And that's when My Asshole Brother repeated what I said but grumbled -- you know, how you sound when you recount someone saying something stupid?  You know, a dumb-guy voice?  That's what he was saying.  And then I said something else, maybe I was insulting him, and he did it again.  Seriously, this fucker is 42 years old and he's reduced to repeating what people say to him like a boy 30 years younger.  And drunk.

I could go on, but I can't.  All I wonder now is where our "relationship" is now that he basically set it on fire with his juvenile behavior.  I really think I shouldn't see him for a while.  And so if my parents are planning dinner with him and his wife and daughter ... man, I think I have to be busy then.