I'm Fucked

I tried, I really did.  Well, OK ... I could have worked faster.  Maybe I didn't have to count and recount, and maybe I could have skipped looking at the back to make sure it was the right code.  But we're dealing with invoicing here, asking for money.  You can't screw that up.  Well, actually, I already did -- today, for the first half of work, I had to redo part of a bill I sent because I screwed up where the shots went, sending them to one place when actually they had to go to another.  So no matter how thorough and deliberate I am at this point, it doesn't totally prevent mistakes.  And yet I go slow anyway.  And today I saw the consequences of that, consequences which might lead to my early exit out of this project.

What do I mean?  While going through the invoices, I saw a woman who works in the same company go to one of the two remaining temps, the remaining man, and tell him a new task that he needed to do.  This is important to note because either earlier this week or late last week I think my boss's boss told me that after I got done with this, I was going to do what this guy is doing now.  I think they had that lined up for me, but because I took too long they decided they couldn't wait and just gave him that job.  My job.

And that sucks because I am going to get done with bills today.  Well, at least I promised my boss's boss last week that I will.  Honestly, I think I will, but if today is like Thursday, when problems kept occurring and I was sidetracked because I had to put out fires, I won't.  Unless I (in my opinion) half-ass the vetting and just do the billing without one last thorough check.  If I do that I could get that stuff done in an hour.  You know, maybe half-assing is something I should have done all along, because then I would have moved onto the stuff this other guy is doing now and they wouldn't think I was being too slow.

I have no idea what is lined up for me now, what next step there is to do.  With him taking what was supposed to be my responsibility, I don't even know if there is a next step.

Holy God ... I might lose my job tomorrow.  And all because I was being slow deliberate.  I'm fucked.