And I have to say that I am quite relieved, even happy, that I saw him. I was kind of afraid what I was going to get myself into, but he was patient and listened as I unloaded my troubles onto him.
I realized something: I don't have too many friends. It's not as if I want more. But in confessing all my fears and frustrations to the psychologist, I thought of the times I actually had a friend, in the same room with me, to whom I could talk about things, and afterward I felt so much better. It was the same feeling I had with this guy, and that feeling was something I had not felt in so long.
I was thinking that the psychoanalysis would start pretty deeply from the get-go, but (without spilling details ... patient-client privilege and all that) he just asked what I was there for and let me vent. The only psychoanalytical thing he asked me was something about the people who worked for my parents at The Store. And I'm kind of thinking what's happening at work stems from what I saw in interactions between my folks and their employees. All this time I was thinking -- hoping -- that I learned what not to do from those interactions.
Man, I feel so good right now that ... and I can't believe I'm saying this ... I don't think I would mind teaching those two temp assholes the tasks I want to keep for myself. OK, so they'll talk back and act like I'm stupid. Doesn't matter -- I have someone I can complain to about them.
But maybe that feeling will pass and I'll go back to being grouchy and suspicious.
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