Knowing my plans for today, I knew that after watching the EPL in the morning downtown and before watching the NFL conference championship games in the afternoon and evening (while getting groceries and lunch inbetween) I would finally fill the two problem tires with air. I did so even though I may have taken a little more time than I wanted to at Target because I couldn't find all of the items I had coupons for.
Pumping air into my tires was fine. But there was one damn hitch. The valve on the passenger-side rear tire, for some fucking reason, is jammed up against the side of the hubcap. All the other tire valves on the minivan are ... how do you describe it ... in the middle, you know, right in between those ... uh, arches of the hubcap, thingy? The valves have a lot of space surrounding it, so all you do is twist the cap open and then twist it closed once you're done, you know? But for this one my finger is pushed up against the side of the hubcap. It makes it a real pain in the ass to measure the tire pressure, too, because I have to slide the gauge right up against the hubcap. I don't know why the hell that is.
So I have trouble taking off the valve cap. And then I do, but my hand knocks against the hubcap and I drop it inside the hubcap. I have to dig my hand in there, and I find it, but as I pick it up I think the cap hits the hubcap and I drop the fucking thing again, and this time I don't know where behind the wheel it is. So I spend the next five fucking minutes getting my hands dirty as I rummage behind every nook and cranny behind the hubcap to feel where it is.
I actually find it, but I can't get my fingers around it. So I actually turn the engine on and back up the car in the hopes that reorienting the wheel might jar the cap loose. That didn't work, or it may have slipped from one part behind the hubcap to another part where it got lodged again. Whatever happened, I located it again, and I tried to shake it loose by driving the car back up one-quarter revolution of the tires, but now I don't know where it is. So fuck this, I thought, and I drove home, one tire valve cap-less.
This basically ruins the rest of my night. For one thing, I spent ten, fifteen minutes looking for this tire pressure cap. Because of this, I had to alter where I got lunch. I was going to go to Culver's (with a coupon) because I hadn't gone there in some time. But that was kind of far away, and with the time I took to look for this piece of shit cap I thought I had to eat somewhere closer. I was lucky I had a coupon to Burger King, so I went there. But the Culver's coupon expired at month's end (another reason why I planned to eat there) while the BK one expires in mid-to-late February. And I don't know if I'll be able to use the Culver's coupon now.
Also, I have this damn tire without a cap. Can I just drive without one so I can just stay inside the rest of the night? I mean, if I don't have a cap, the air in that tire isn't just going to squirt out, is it? It's just a cap! Nah, I guess I can't. But I'm staying inside to watch both football games. After they're done, I'll go out to ... oh, I don't know where to look, maybe Target, maybe a gas station, and I'll buy a cap. And since I'm out, I might as well -- I don't know, go eat or go to My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Edition). Didn't want to spend money, but that's what one fucking cap in a piss-poorly aligned valve on a tire does to my life.
A CAP! A GODDAMN CAP!!!
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