Sunday, September 24, 2017

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#-1: Lynx (Last Week: -1).  Turns out the Washington Mystics did not pose much of a challenge after all.  They Jynx finished the sweep Sunday afternoon in D.C., whipping them 81-70.  And so the series WNBA fans (both of them -- kidding!) expected and hoped will happen: Minnesota plays the defending champion (but 2-seed) Los Angeles Sparks, which swept the Phoenix Mercury (although they won Game 3 by only one point), in the best-of-five WNBA Finals.  ESPN's proprietary (and opaque) BPI gives Minnesota a 52.1% chance to win their fourth title.  But I wonder what percentage chance they had to win it all last year, and look at what happened.  One local reporter thinks the Sparks are deeper than the Jynx, and that might make all the difference.

Too much talk, not enough rock.  Game 1 is Sunday, Game 2 is Tuesday; both of those games are at "home," which in this case will be Williams Arena.  Game 3 is Friday at Staples Center.

#-2: Gopher volleyball (Last Week: -3).  The #1 team in the land started off Big Ten play without much of a hitch, defeating Michigan Friday at Maturi in four.  Wish I had more to say, but I have to work the Vikings game this morning and I'm kind of tired.  I will say, however, that this club has a very busy screening week.  They host Michigan St. at high noon this (Sunday) afternoon (the women's soccer team is also playing in the Twin Cities; I assume both teams are chartering the same flight to save money for the athletic department?), but play four straight after that match.  The first two matches, in fact, come back-to-back Friday and Saturday, and before they head to Iowa, they first face Nebraska.  Their undefeated record will be sorely tested this week.

#-3: United FC (Last Week: -6).  So even though my alma mater's game ended well before 7 yesterday (Saturday), after my friend gave me a ride to my car, I looked up the Green Line/Central Corridor's schedule.  There was a chance that, if I ran in five minutes to the station, I would get there in time for me to catch Opening Kick.  More realistically, however, I would have to wait to catch the 6:46 and get to the station closest to Das Bank at 6:59.  I forgot that, unlike international league games, TV dictates that Major League Soccer matches start at, like, eight minutes after the top of the hour.  But then I thought that I would have to walk to the other side of the stadium (that's where the gates are), then I would have to wait in security, and then I would have to walk up the stairs to get to my seat.  Could I do all that in nine minutes?  I feel secure in saying no.  So I went home and, after flipping through the Loons' match vs. FC Dallas and two college football games, I fell asleep.

I did see the first half of the match, however, in particular Miguel Ibarra's sweet volley from Ibson's chip to give MNUFC a 2-1 lead.  I am happy for Batman; I think he has been maligned in Manager Adrian Heath's doghouse, and this shows he has a place in MLS:




That Ibarra goal turned out to be the game-winner as United won back-to-back games for the first time ever. And they won going away, 4-1 to a Dallas team that had been leading the Western Conference in late July but has accumulated only four points in the two months since.  This might be a win against a side in a tailspin, and ultimately it doesn't vault the team into playoff contention (despite the strenuous optimism of the commentators on TV), but right now I'm rooting for my team not to finish dead last in the west.  They are third from the bottom, so that's good.

There are five games left in the regular season.  Four of them are on the road, which makes sense because the Gopher football team is playing games at TCF Bank Stadium.  They visit Houston Saturday.

#-4: Twins (Last Week: -5).  A 4-3 week.  I had not noticed until recently that the American League Wild Card chase is seen to be sort of turgid, and with the teams behind the Twinks having similarly chopping weeks (the Angels and the Rangers are 3 or 3 1/2 games behind as of press time), the Magic Number for Minnesota to take ALWC2 is 4.

And yet this week starkly shows their ultimate place in the pecking order for the year.  They started out the screening week with a 13-7 win at Target over Toronto, salvaging a split.  And this (Saturday) afternoon the club is going for a sweep of the Tigers, who on Friday they announced that Brad Ausmus won't return as Manager and is so bad that they're just packing it in these days.  The Twins are about to become the first team to lose 100 games in one season and reach the playoffs the next.

Playoffs, technically.  Because midweek they went to the Bronx and did their customary pissing down their fucking legs.  A three-game sweep of the Yankees, the team they will have to visit (at Yankee Stadium) in the Wild Card game, which should be called the Play-In Game, because you can't be in the baseball postseason if you play only one game.  That team has a fantastic bullpen, but I can't help but believe the reason they didn't even win one game is because the Yanks are in the Twinks' head.  Even though no one on the team was around when the Twins were in the playoffs (well, maybe Joe Mauer), as soon as they put on the Twins uniform, they subsume this primordial fear of the Bronx Bombers, and they allow themselves to be bullied by them.  It's extraordinary.  And it's unacceptable.  And I am absolutely certain that in the A.L. Play-In Game, the Twinks are going to get routed.  So I go back to a question I thought about about a month ago: If it's almost certain they're going to lose, why even fight to make the "postseason?"  Well, at this point they're making it because no other team is good enough to take it from them.

After they finish up the series against the Tigers they take their final regular season road trip -- to Cleveland, another team that'll probably wallop them.  That's three games starting Tuesday, and then they come home to finish up the regular season against those Tigers beginning Friday.

#-5: Gopher soccer (Last Week: -7).  I had never seen anything quite like what I saw at Robbie Stadium Thursday night.  The U. XI gave up an early goal to Michigan on a cross, and my ire was building throughout the game.  One time I was grumbling so loudly the girl walking down the bleachers turned her head my way.  But in the second half, after the squad punched in a rebound Goal, I shouted, "Finally!"  And when Julianna Garnes, who scored that first tally, braced late in the second half, I thought I would witness my first-ever come-from-behind win from this team.

But in the 90th Minute, the Wolverines' Sarah Stratigakis, who wended her way past Gopher defenders to assist teammate Katie Foug for the first Goal, got loose down the sideline.  And for whatever goddamn reason, Minnesota Goalie Kailee Sharp came out of the box to try and tackle the ball.  Stratigakis managed to get around Sharp and, with a Gopher defender draped over her, flexed her leg at the ball in desperation.  The ball was on target, and despite two U. players scurrying back toward goal, the soccer ball tucked in past the post.  Michigan tied the game with 11 seconds left, and after a pair of 10-minute Extra Time periods, the game ended as a two-all draw.

Minnesota pulled a tie from the jaws of victory.  Unbe-fucking-lievable.

They host Michigan St. this (Sunday) afternoon, then go to Rutgers Friday.

#-6: Vikings (Last Week: -4).  I had a bad feeling about this season, and now the news is lining up with my worst fears.  After playing footsie with the media, it was revealed mere hours before Sunday's game versus Pittsburgh that starting Quarterback Sam Bradford is out.  At that point every fan predicted a Vikes loss (even though many predicted a Vikes loss before the news broke about Bradford), which is funny to me.  I mean, Minnesota did lose, and it was a done deal well before the game was over.  But most of us took the defeat as fact even before the game started.  Can we at least see how the offense is working (or not working) before we make any conclusions?  What I find even weirder is that some fans were OK with this loss, saying that the Steelers were supposed to beat the Vikes.  So what?  You built in a loss as part of your expectations and still have high hopes for this club?  Did you see how they played?  They're not good right now, and odds are they won't be good for the rest of the year!

The Vikings did all of us a favor and declared Bradford out well before today's (Sunday's) game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  I for one can now prepare myself for the inevitable loss, even if I am working the game.  I might as well get ready for the probability of a long season now.

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