Come On, No Headphones?!

Yeah, yesterday at work wasn't as good as I hoped it would be.  Well, my supervisor said I was getting the hang of things.  I appreciate the kind words, but I don't believe that to be the case.  Things didn't come back to me as I would have liked, a product of being away from work for a whole week.  And there's no telling whether I'll be able to remember everything I did this morning when I go back, let alone next week when I'm actually doing it.

What really ticked me off was that, for today's training, I will be off on my own, I will be at the actual desk where I work for this new/Fourth Department ... and my supervisor says she wants me off my headphones for the whole day.  Dammit!  I hate it when I am doing a task that is both difficult and boring.  I need a distraction; that's why I've got a headphone jammed into at least one ear while I'm working.  But she says that at this job, I'll have to be attentive to when someone or a call approaches me.  Well, I think I can walk and chew gum at the same time.  Moreover, if it's a long day, and if I'm kind of pissed, I need to freakin' listen to something.  Hey, I'll deal with a day with no radio tomorrow, and maybe even through training.  But once I'm doing this for real, I'm putting my headphones on for real.  And if this job precludes me from doing that ... well, we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

I didn't really take the news I couldn't listen to anything very well.  Not the news but my reaction to that news ratcheted up the tension in me, and I wasn't good the rest of the day.  That ain't the attitude one should bring to your fantasy football auction, but I did, and (this is inside fantasy football baseball, so forgive me), I left $19 of fake money on the table.  I could have gone and bid more for one of those Wide Receivers I wanted -- D. K. Metcalf, Justin Jefferson, even Robert Woods.  If I were in a better frame of mind from work, I think I would have had a better auction.

And I'm still so frazzled at training the rest of the week that I can't even look at porn to relax, let alone masturbate to take the edge off.  Well, the former at least isn't true; I looked at porn just now on the Internet.  But touching myself before getting to the end of this hellish work week?  Ick.  I'm glad I got double-teamed by ***e* and ******e Monday night, before I started training.

May this day be less worse than the previous one.  Don't know how, but I wish it so.