Gonna Catch Hell At Work Again. Gonna Lose It

Thought that given the decrease in work coming in and the increasing number of times the people working at The Main Department have been allowed to leave early, I thought yesterday/Tuesday could be a day where I could leave early and talk to my psychotherapist early.  Nuh-uh.  Every one of us was late getting out of work -- me by only 15 minutes, but everyone else by 45.  There was a slight uptick in the number of forms that came in, but I say it's mostly due to the fact that we didn't all those forms until late, and that the software we use to key information into our database got so slow and buggy that it froze, no joke, up to three dozen times over the course of the day.

But the paranoiac in me thinks that I will be blamed for the time overrun.  I was scanning these forms in, and I am, shall we say, methodical.  OK, I could be described as slow.  And I wonder if people in that department wonder if they could have left on time if not for my supposed slow-pokiness.  I did my best, but this might be a case where my best isn't good enough.

That's important to note if any accusations get run up to my boss.  See, I'm in The Fourth Department from today/Wednesday through the end of the week, and I know I will be faced with going over again.  I'm already about 20 minutes on the plus side.  It's inevitable that I stay late at least one of the next three days, thus getting over 40 hours for the week.  I'm not going to go out of my way to leave early; I know what I'm doing back there, and I think how I'm doing the job is right.  But that means the eventual and inevitable, "What the hell are you doing staying late again?!" e-mail from my boss, and frankly, I have had it.  I'm pretty sure I'll get crap for saying late the first two days of the week, so I'm dreading the worst.  And I am in such a bad mood anticipating these accusations that I might just blurt something out that I will regret after I say it.  I'm still looking for another job, but for now, I still have this one -- and I still need it.  But I swear, if my boss gives me any grief about staying late again, I think I will lose it.