#-1: Vikings (Re-Entry!). You really can't tell how a draft goes until three years down the road. But that doesn't sportswriters from proclaiming who "won" and "lost" the NFL Draft. Down those unreasonable lines, the Vikings "won" the draft (which took place more than a week ago, but I forgot to include it last week, so it tops this week's list).
They had picks 23 and 25 in a year with very few, if any, good prospects that might make it to the Pro Football Hall Of Fame, but many good rookies that could go in the teens and twenties of the first round. But according to General Manager Rick Spielman on SI.com's Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback, the best players, offensive linemen, were taken first, thus pushing defensive players some mock drafts had fairly high into the Vikings' area of the first round. Spielman, nor anyone else, had no idea that Florida Defensive Tackle Sharrif Floyd, a man some people thought could go as high as third in the draft, would slip all the way into the Vikings' waiting arms at pick 23. Floyd apparently slipped apparently because he has, like, short arms, like dinosaur arms, or something. If you look at the picture, I think Floyd's arms are normal enough.
Pick 25 I would have been OK with them taking Manti Te'o. Linebacker is a need and I thought, especially considering where they were picking, he would have been a great value choice. But instead they went to fill another weakness, Cornerback (although admittedly every NFL team of this pass-happy league has weakness at Cornerback) and took Florida St.'s Xavier Rhodes. Intriguing pick; I was initially unhappy, but, like Te'o, he's a good choice late in the first round.
So Spielman started his press conference when he was forced to leave the dais after receiving a phone call. He needed to take a dump? No. Booty call? No. Turns out the New England Patriots, who legendarily choose quantity over quality when it comes to the draft, were receptive to the Vikings' offer of giving their 29th pick in exchange for a slew of Minnesota's picks. I saw one guy on Twitter scream, "No! Don't do it!! The Pats are going to turn it into another rookie bonanza!!!" They might. Shit, man, Bill Belichick, probably will turn two of the Vikings' four draft picks they received into the Offensive and Defensive Players Of The Year. But the tweeter implies that this move will haunt the team for the rest of their days, like the Herschel Walker deal. I would care only if those draft picks specifically beat Minnesota in a future Super Bowl. Till then, who cares?
Meanwhile, with the 29th pick, I'm salivating as to who will be the team's third first-round pick. Now would be the perfect time to grab Te'o. But no! Led by Jason LaCanfora, whose Twitter feed a followed at Buffalo Wild Wings all night, writers announced before the official on-stage announcement by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell that the Vikes were picking someone whom many pundits thought the team would draft all along, as well as someone whom some people thought would be picked before Minnesota had a chance to select him: Tennessee Wide Receiver Cordarrelle Patterson. The book on Patterson: He only has one year in top-flight college after two years at junior college and his route-running is raw -- bad flashbacks to Troy Williamson -- but he has so much potential. He will be groomed to be the next Percy Harvin, a slash-type player who could be shifted from the outside to the slot to the Wing-T to the backfield, just to fuck with the other team.
We have no idea if Patterson will pan out. Neither Floyd nor Rhodes. But the only real way to evaluate who "won" a draft just after it's over, in my opinion, is to see which team makes the biggest splash. And with three first-rounders, the Vikings did at least that.
#-2: Timberwolves (Re-Entry!). They are here because they fired -- OK, technically they decided not to pick up the option -- of President Of Basketball Operations David Kahn. In his four years since being plucked out of the ether and plugged back into the National Basketball Association after so much time away, he guided the Woofie Dogs to an 89-223 record with, you guessed it, zero playoff appearances.
I didn't think that a playoff spot this year was a guarantee, especially after Kevin Love broke his hand before the season began. That plus the spate of injuries that decimated the club's year, and I was willing to give Kahn at least another year. But the way Kahn and Owner Glen Taylor sold this bill of goods, this was supposed to be the year the team finally turns the corner and makes the postseason. Under that line of thinking, even with the injuries to Love and Rubio and Andrei Kirilenko, et al., heads had to roll. And Kahn's was the easiest and most obvious.
There are many writers who told Kahn not to let the door hit has ass on the way out. But to play devil's advocate, I point you to Henry Abbott, lead writer of the TrueHoop NBA blog on ESPN.com, who notes that the team has a rosy future, led by Rubio and Love, after the post-Kevin Garnett Dark Ages. But to play reverse devil's advocate, what good is a rosy future if the present doesn't lead to a championship. We Timberwolves fans have been patient with getting shitty seasons out of the way just so we can chug through bad contracts and wait for high draft picks to develop. But there has to be some dividends at some point. Let's say they should make the playoffs next year, and not get swept in their first-round series.
I would have fired Kahn because apparently he's an asshole, a weird asshole, as Abbott and many others can attest to. Also, of the many baffling transactions he made before a real grown-up, Head Coach Rick Adelman, started having a say, he will forever be known for taking Point Guards in back-to-back picks in a draft. I should put a finer point on his sorry legacy: He will forever be known for following up a great pick in Rubio with an absolutely atrocious pick in Jonny Flynn instead of drafting Stephen Curry (who had an incredible third quarter in Monday's Game 1 thriller loss to San Antonio).
But think about this: If Kahn is doomed to always be known as the guy who passed up Stephen Curry for Jonny Flynn, shouldn't Taylor be similarly known as the guy who hired David Kahn? Whatever the case, any hire will be seen as a step up, and steps don't get more, uh, upper than bringing back Flip Saunders, Kevin McHale's ex-friend-turned-scapegoat in the 2003-4 NBA season (that's what McHale will always be known for -- well, that and finally trading away KG), this time not as Head Coach but as GM. He'll get a lot of rope in these parts because he's One Of Us (even though he was born in Ohio). Saunders was not the problem when the Woofie Dogs fell so precipitously from the Western Conference Finals, but he is unproven in management. Again, goodwill gives him ample latitude, but he can't waste the talent that this team with the rosy future has, especially if all the key parts are back and healthy from the outset.
#-3: Gopher baseball (Last Week: -1). Won two of three at Penn St., and so, despite the wide disparity in number of conference games played, they currently sit on top of the Big Ten with an 11-4 record. They failed to get the sweep of the Nittany Lions in extra innings. In the top of the 10th they loaded the bases but failed to score with back-to-back grounders (the first cutting off the guy headed home, the second a Grounding Into A Double Play). In the bottom of the frame with maximum juice and one out, Taylor Skerpon beat out a GIDP to end the game and give the Lions a 4-3 win.
Meanwhile, the U.'s Wednesday game at home vs. St. Thomas was cancelled. Six of the Gophers' last eight home games have either been postponed or cancelled. How weird is that shit? Remember that that includes a complete wipeout of their series against Michigan St., which is why Minnesota has fewer games in the B1G.
If the season were to end today ... well, first of all it'd surprise the shit out of all of us because the season isn't supposed to end today. But if it were, they probably would still not be in the NCAA Tournament. They might need to win the conference tournament, which will be held Memorial Weekend at Target Field. But it would also certainly help if they continue winning. And to that end, the best part is that they will be home for the rest of the regular season: A midweek showdown with Wisconsin-Milwaukee (assuming they get that game in; the forecast Wednesday calls for rain) followed by the weekend series versus Nebraska (forecast, if I recall correctly, is good, which means I might be going down there for a game).
#-4: Wild (Last Week: 0). Remember last week when I said I didn't give a shit if the Mild get swept by Chicago? Yeah, forget I said that, at least for now. I do give a shit. And I realized that when Minnesota swung both ways in digging themselves an 0-2 hole. They were so close in taking Game 1, with Josh Harding admirably standing on his head after being substituted in for Nicklas Backstrom (who couldn't play because he hurt his groin during warm-ups) and Jason Zucker hitting the crossbar in overtime. Bryan Bickell did not hit the crossbar, and so he gave the Blackhawks a thrilling but ultimately demoralizing 2-1 win.
From what I heard about the game (couldn't see it because of it being on cable and all), it sounded like, despite some TV reporters saying that they played like seasoned veterans, the youngsters on the club, were hanging on for dear life in trying to understand how differently playoff hockey is played than during the regular season. Therefore it felt like they were going to get blitzed in Game 2 6-0. It wasn't that bad, but they got blitzed, 5-2. So they lost a nail-biter and got blown out. Shit, neither defeat is better than the other. They're both pretty bad.
So even though I have a friend who offered to sell me tickets to Sunday afternoon's Game 3, I passed. (He was asking for $80, and that was too rich for my blood.) Why be witness to a slaughter. Except that it wasn't a slaughter. In a game where the Wild managed to take it to Chicago (memories of the old Blackhawks-North Stars almost brought me to tears!), they didn't let a late regulation goal by the 'Hawks rattle them. In OT, Matt Cullen apparently was able to pass the puck from behind the net on his front after he got tripped to Jason Zucker, who hiked a shot past Corey Crawford the game-winner about 2 1/2 minutes in. And with that, the team at least hasn't completely embarrassed themselves this series.
I still doubt they're going to win, but you never know. Game 4 is tonight, about a half-hour after I type this, and if the Wild manage to tie this series at 2 ... hoo-boy. Whatever happens, the series ends this weekend: Games 6 and 7 are back-to-back, in St. Paul and then in Chicago (even though they are not in the same division, and by the way, I'm so glad that the National Hockey League Players Association finally agreed to realign into four divisions, because that means Minnesota will finally be taken out of their ginned-up Northwest Division "rivals" with Colorado, Edmonton, Calgary and Vancouver and shoved into traditional Norris Division rivals Chicago and St. Louis).
#-5: Twins (Last Week: -2). A Stephen Drew double off Jared Burton in the bottom of the 11th prevented the Twinks from reaching .500 for the week, therefore they go 2-4 for the second screening week in a row. Phil Miller of the Star Tribune thought that this year's Twins team has improved because, among other things, they have been able to prevent sweeps on the road by winning the final games of the series. That may be true; they did win the third games at Detroit and Cleveland this week. But if they continue to go 1-2 every series, on the road as well as at home, the club will finish with a record of about 54-108.
After they finish in Boston (thus completing their longest road trip of the year), they start a long homestand Friday with series against Baltimore and the White Sox.
#-Infinity: Swarm (Last Week: Positive Numbers). Yeah, I was afraid that I would put these guys on such a lofty perch just before they get eliminated. And now, it's over. They were playing catchup from the get-go at Rochester, being blanked after one quarter 3-0. But they stormed back to take a 9-7 lead before the Knighthawks ripped off five in a row to eventually win and take the Eastern Conference Championship (even though the Smarm are in the Western Conference) 12-10.
The Swarm, as you would expect, are putting a positive spin on things, pointing out that Jordan MacIntosh, last week named National Lacrosse League's Transition Player Of The Year (guess you can't call him the Tranny Of The Year) was this afternoon named to the NLL All-Pro First Team. And yeah, they won their first playoff game for the second year in a row. Plus, they're a young team and there's an 8/9 chance they'll be in the playoffs again. But it'll be Rochester against Washington in this season's championship game, and it could have been the Swarm, and since it's not, this season ends in failure.
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