I have my half-year health insurance renewal through the state coming up -- or, rather, came up. I did not fill it out to the state's satisfaction, so I have one more chance to get it right by the end of the month, which was yesterday (Tuesday), or I really do lose my health insurance.
So I did everything they asked. I filled in all the "No" bubbles, I sent a letter explaining my current work situation, and I copied and sent said copies of the paystubs I got after I had to send the renewal application the first time. However, I did not send it out immediately. I thought I would, but I made the mistake of cashing out my entire Certificate of Deposit a couple weeks ago while I was furloughed from my job. I liquidated the CD in order to pay off my credit card bill, which I was going to do after the billing period cycled over. But what if the person deciding whether or not I get health insurance through the state checks on my checking account (I believe they can do that) and sees that I have more cash than I said I did, even though that money will promptly be spent?
It's at this point the wheels start turning and go down the rabbit hole and all rational thought goes out the window.
I can't pay off my credit card bill till I know how much is on it, so the money that's in there has to stay in there a little longer than I planned. But I then run up on the Tuesday deadline, and missing that will mean I get no health insurance, and that's plenty worse. But what happens if I am deemed too "rich" to get health insurance through the state? I'd get no health insurance then anyway.
And on top of all that I got a few paychecks I wanted to cash in immediately to shore up my account. But that would also damage my standing with the state. Decisions, decisions.
So I needed to thread a needle: Delay sending in the health insurance renewal form until I deplete my checking account in order to pay off my debts, but don't delay it so much that I'm late completely. The person who decides this needs to know the real truth about how much money I really have, and so she or he needs to know that after I pay off my credit card I'm still in a world of hurt.
Therefore, I decided to send in my renewal Thursday. And since I decided I'd stay out to watch the NFL Draft at Buffalo Wild Wings (and not Hooters like I wanted), that seemed like a good time to kill two birds with one stone and drop off my renewal form while visiting Eden Prairie Mall, a place I hadn't been to since getting passes to see the pilot of the TV show House a decade ago through Entertainment Weekly (I brought my sister) because it's so far away from where I live, yet is about 20 minutes away from where I currently work. It's your basic, proud, run-of-the-mill mall.
It took me about a half-hour to find its mailbox. When I opened it up, it said the pick-up time is at 5 during the week. It was past 5 last Thursday. So I started to panic. The mailman won't pick it up until after 5 Friday, or after the workweek is over. This has to go to my county seat, so about an hour north of where the mailbox was. Do they sort things Friday nights? Do they sort them Saturdays, or even Sunday evenings? Theoretically the distance between the mailbox and the county seat is so short that I guess it could be delivered Saturday afternoon. But, well, first of all, government offices are closed. And second, what if I was wrong? What if they're not going to even look at it until, say Monday? It would be five days from letting the renewal application slip out of my hands to it being opened by someone in authority, but I was truly scared that it would not hit the government office until yesterday (Tuesday), the last day of the month. And if it probably wouldn't get there until then, there's always a chance that the beleaguered United States Post Office could delay it until -- fuck -- today (Wednesday). The 1st of May. Or, in other words, too fucking late to help me get my health insurance renewed.
Moreover, the next day, as I was driving home from work, I decided to take the long way around because I thought it might be less congested than the freeway I usually take home. (It wasn't, by the way.) Along the way I saw a post office, right next to the complex where I work. I had noticed it once or twice before, but it never occurred to me to drop off my health insurance do-over forms there.
Let's just hope I'm paranoid and hope for the best, shall we?
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