Shit, I let this get way too long again. Starting from Monday, February 17:
- Didn't spend a thing on Monday -- which is becoming a thing; I just eat at home, work out, then eat at home again -- so let's go back to Sunday the 16th. I wanted to work on a bunch of things -- this EWR, going through my receipts, helping my parents translate Chinese on Firefox -- at Caffetto, but goddammit, they were once again all filled up. The hair salon next door closed, and they could have bought the space, knocked down the wall and expanded (I think the business would come, and then some), but an ice cream shop is moving in instead. So I just took my computer and went over to the only other place I could think of at the time that was open -- Pryes Brewing. They're only open till 10, which sucks, and I didn't open up my computer because it feels very awkward to look at a laptop in a microbrewery. But I did go through and write down all my receipts. The pizza I bought was nice, although it was cold, although that may have been because I left it sitting there while I was organizing my receipts. But they had a nitro raspberry sour, and damn, I think I like sours. Maybe I didn't tip like I should have because there is tax at Pryes, which screws me up. Nevertheless, it's a good place, even though it would have been much cheaper if I found a table at Caffetto. Total, with tip: $24.
- On Saturday the 15th I went down to My Favorite Stripclub to see my ATF before my parents come home. (I was going to make it A Night Of Babes; after this I went to Hooters to hopefully get some calendar girls to sign my calendar, but none of them were working that night.) She was there, and she was great, even though she is getting a little chunkier. But hey, so am I. A dozen table dancers with her, plus cover (which I think my instant mac 'n' cheese took a couple dollars off of), stage tips (eight for my ATF, one for this other veteran I was going to tip more of before I saw my ATF was finally done with another customer) and Coke (I preferred a beer, but no waitress showed up until halfway through my stay) equals: $144.
- Back to Friday the 14th, aka Valentines Day ... I was going to do this strip club/Hooters thing on this night, but a stripper from My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division) invited all of through the Facebook group to this event at this performance space at the basement of a bar. I thought it was going to be burlesque with puns. Or something. But the only thing I thought was going to happen that did happen was the puns. The stripper said it was going to start at 8, so I got there before then; it started, I think, around 9:30. (And I forgot my phone at home; I was staring at people for 90 minutes -- boring as hell, but maybe that's better than staring at my phone for 90 minutes.) She said cover was $5 when it was actually $10. I checked the website for drink specials and the one on special Friday nights has a new name -- that ain't that important, but it goes with the theme of the night, which is deception! And oh, I realized, again, that I get my fill of puns fairly quickly. I left before it ended because, hey, they didn't start on time. All told the damage was: $15.
- Thursday the 13th -- I was so hungry after work that when I went to the gas station for money, I also bought a hot dog. The cashier was on the phone so he didn't speak to me at all. When he rung me up, I gave him two bucks; he just opened up the cash register, put the two bucks in, closed it and gave me the receipt. I pointed to the change in my hand; he waved me off. Therefore, I just paid: $2.
- There was a stripper party that evening. It was at a house that, from the outside, looks like a store. The lap dance area was out in the open, so I only got a pair of lappers from Breezy. There were nine girls who showed up, but by the time I left, only five did, and I only recognized three of them, and I didn't get any dances from one of them, the host *****a, because ... well, I'll explain below. Of the two, one was Breezy. The other was ****a, who I took to the bed, which was not out in the open, because after she worked my cock over with her mouth, doing that blowjob out in the open would have been scandalous! With cover and room fee: $190.
- I stayed at this party for 2 1/2 hours. I got more money than I actually spent. That helped me get this massage with ******a. That massage -- and it's a completely chaste one, not one with happy ending -- came together quickly. She texted me earlier that week about offering massages instead of lap dances, and it was only the morning of the 13th where I replied. I then saw at the party that "her schedule opened up" so that she could give me a massage that night. I was out and was ready to leave, so instead of getting back home in time to watch L&O:SVU, I went to her place for a 25-minute massage. Not bad, although these kinks in my neck and back may never leave me. At least it cost me just: $40.
- Take this back to Sunday, February 9. I think I blogged about this: I did not want to be stuck at home watching the Oscars, but I took a nap so late that it began by the time I woke up. I was rutting around, wondering about where to go. So I went to a microbrewery, like I said, and it was Pryes. I got out so late that I spent less than an hour there before they closed up. But this is where I fell in love with their raspberry sour. With tip: $7.66
- Friday, February 7: My face hair was getting long, so I gave the guys from Moler another chance. It was, to be honest, one of the most patient, thoughtful, and best face shaves I've ever received from this place. This student shaves like a pro. For that, I gave him a five-dollar tip. With the shave at a cost of $6, I paid a total of: $11.
- Went to Jersey Mike's for lunch. These guys make great subs, but I only go here because I have a coupon knocking off two bucks for them.
Nevertheless I charged the sub, chips and pop. But I used cash for the tip: $1.(ETA at 9:54 p.m. on March 28 that I in fact did not use my credit card here but instead totally used all money. So the correct EWR here is: $11.43.) - I wanted to work on my receipts in the evening while going out. But I wanted to go somewhere else before going to Glam Doll. Hmmm -- don't know why. But I went to Caribou close by work.
Charged the coffee, so this is tip only: $1.(ETA at 9:56 p.m. on March 28, and this shit is pissing me off, that I did not use my credit card for this transaction either. I paid with cash: $5.82.) - At Glam Doll I got one donut and a pour-over. Got a second donut free, for which I tipped. Total: $10.91.
- On Thursday the 6th *****a came over for some vicious hand lovin'. Because of this, I didn't have to get any dances from her in the party she hosted later in the month. Total: $140.
- She kind of pissed me off. She planned on coming in later that evening, so I had time to get my hair cut (it was getting annoying long). But while I was there she said she was suddenly free and she was moseying over to my house. So I had to cancel and come home. And then I waited because she said she couldn't be there on time. It isn't fun to have my plans screwed up, no matter that I was getting a good handjob. But she got done in time for me to get to a Great Clips that closes at 9. Say, you ever notice that most haircutter places close at 8? The GC I usually go to does, but there was one not too far from where I live that closes at 9. Unfortunately the stylist fucked it up. But as a sucker I overpaid for tip.
Charged the haircut, however, so the total EWR is: $4.(ETA at 9:48 p.m. on March 28 that I did not in fact charge the haircut. I used cash money all the way. So the actual EWR is: $20. - So apparently I can go all the way back to Thursday, January 30. After work I went to Lisa's to get my shoes shined. It had been a long time. With tip: $15.
- I made a night of it; I planned on doing a nighttime snow-shoeing event at the Walker. But I wanted to cool my heels somewhere before then. Luckily there was a microbrewery close by that I wanted to try: Sisyphus. Nice place, although parking is at a premium. At least they let you bring in outside food, so that's why I did -- after getting my Doc's shined I went to a place next door to get salad, and I got a First Beer We Ever Named to wash it down with. I should go to microbreweries more often. With tip the beer was: $7.
- Wednesday, January 29 -- I still have to work on my health care directive, but my lawyer said to look at this template from the University of Minnesota. It is very interesting; it prompts you to think about end-of-life issues, the stuff that most people don't want to even think about. As I blog about this, I should take another look at it. Anyway, I printed it out at the library on this day. It's a big printout: $1.40.
- On Sunday the 26th I went back to Lamplighter Lounge for the second time since the demise of BJ's. Nearly all the strippers who work there migrated here -- and it appears as though all the regular customers there migrated here, too. I told a couple of the girls that I was dropping in. One of them, *****y, asked me to buy menthol cigarettes from the smoke shop next door. I wondered why I couldn't just buy them at a gas station. *****y replied that a new law kicked in saying that all menthol products -- such as the packs of cigs she and another girl, ****a, wanted me to by for them -- cannot be bought at gas stations anymore. I did further research; that is a county law, and as far as I know, even though Ramsey County (in which the Lamp resides) bans menthols at gas stations, my county does not. Anyway, I parked at the Lamp and then walked across the street to Noble Tobacco to get a pack of Newport Menthol Shorts and Newport Menthol 100s. Cigarettes are expensive. Total: $19.60.
- Oh, and when I got there, *****y paid me back for her cigs. ****a didn't, but I'm not upset. An Infusion of: $10.
- And I got dances at the Lamp. Since I was last there, lo so many years ago, there are two dances areas, one for $10 per and one for $20. I took ****a to the $20's for a trio, and we grinded so much that I got real hard. The $10's are more out in the open, but another BJ's refugee, Giselle, took me to that area for a pair, and I got accosted by someone not from BJ's, Summer, for one dance in the less expensive area. Wanted a drink, but no bartender asked me if I wanted one. Pffft. Total: $90.
- Apparently we hurtle back to Saturday, January 18 ... I wanted to go to Brit's to watch some EPL. I don't want to rehash this, but I had to give some dude who lives in the assisted living hotels nearby some money to help me get my car out of snow that it wasn't really in, sigh: $2.
- Wanted to go out in the evening. Perfect time to try the new microbrewery in my hometown, Forgotten Star. Incredible building with dramatic outdoor lighting. Inside's nice too, although it could use more customers. Got a Northstar Cream Ale, pulled up a table, and organized my receipts. With tip: $7.
- And I took a quarter I found in the old car. An Infusion of: 25 cents.
- Thursday, January 16 ... there was a party *****a hosted. I recapped it here. Total: $250.
- On Monday the 13th I went to another house party. This one was off the fucking chain, too. Got one dance from the host, *****e. But before that I took **y up to her bed -- it was her condo, even though she wasn't hosting the party, go figure -- and her cock-sucking skills were on point! She knew how to work my pee-pee -- biting my tip, then sucking hard down my shaft. **y even sucked my balls and fumunda place! I was standing up and she was kneeling on her bed when she forced me to cum, and it would have been more forceful if there wasn't a knock on the door just before I orgasmed, thus scaring me and cutting off the spray of my jism into her mouth. But she's so good, I need to see her again! Total: $180.
- Saturday the 11th: I think I went to work that day. Treated myself to a big hot mocha from Caribou. With tip: $7.
- After work I went to Panchero's while the Vikings were losing. Not the most festive way to know that your team's season is about to end. But you know what? Panchero's does something Chipotle doesn't do: They use a scoop to mix the ingredients in the burrito you get before they wrap it up. That's great, mixing everything! Why doesn't Chipotle do that?? Total with tip: $15.03.
- Friday, January 10 ... like the next day, I was working different hours in a different department. Also went to Caribou before going to work, but this time I used my points for a free mocha, which I did not know I had. I was so overjoyed I overtipped -- hey, I'm getting the drink for free! I tipped: $2.
- At night I went to ******a's place. Since BJ's closed, she has done private parties at her place ... but sadly, no hanky-panky stuff, just clean dances (and, as I later learned, chaste massages). Got three; tipped on top of it by her pleading. Left spending: $70.
- I was so hungry after seeing ******a that I went to Flameburger to eat a huge dinner. Hadn't been there in about a year. Hope it never closes. Plus tip: $19.
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