Fuck Lawn Mowing

Man, all I wanted to do was mow the lawn.  But then I threw up a little in mouth a second time so I had to stop and go inside to get a generic Pepto-Bismol tablet (which got the attention of My Mother, who now sews in the dining room, to get all up in my business about why am I taking medicine), and then I decided to throw away the wrapper in the bathroom instead of the kitchen because My Fucking Mother might ask more questions, but then as I bend down to toss the wrapper in the trash can my left headphone falls off my ear and into the toilet paper in the trash and then as I bend up that left headphone gets caught on the side of the trash can so my right earphone falls off my right ear and when I bend down again to pick up both headphones I hit my head against the bathroom counter.  Motherfuck!

Then after I went outside I had to go back inside -- at least I think so, I don't know -- because the goddamn suntan lotion got into and started stinging my eyes.  But at least I didn't lose my headphones in toilet paper filled with my shit nor bang my head against the counter.  Small victories, right?

Oh, and then once I got done, I had to grab a plastic bag to put all the grass clippings in.  But when I took out the rear bag behind the mower, I didn't, because the goddamn rear chute wasn't open for clippings to go into the rear bag.  I thought it was connected, but it wasn't.  It looked connected when I got the mower.  I thought Father just kept the bag connected to the mower and the rear chute open to the bag, but he didn't.  But it looked like it was because he rested the bag on the mower in such a way that I just assumed that it was all hooked up.  Yeah, I looked at the rear bag and actually connected it to the mower without opening up the rear chute.  Why do you ask?

Gah!  It's the 4th of July.  Here's Soundgarden's "4th of July," aka The Greatest Song Ever: