Friday, August 6, 2021

The Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey

#0: United FC (Last Week: 0).  In its only Match of the screening Week, on the road versus Vancouver at Real Salt Lake, they drew with the Whitecaps, 2-all, in what really was a bullshit call.  In the dying embers of the Game, a Whitecap attacker, in the Loons box, dragged down Ethan Finlay.  The Referee called a Foul on Finlay and, because this happened in the box, awarded Van City a Penalty Kick, which Cristian Dajome (who scored the 'Caps' other Goal) converted to salvage a Tie.  Worse than the initial call itself was both the ref and the Video Assistant Referee refusing to take another look at what is a clear and obvious mistake.  MNUFC is still in playoff position, but every Point counts, and this keeps the club on the edge.  Still, because by all rights the Loons should have won this, I am placing them above negative numbers.

They host another woebegone squad, Houston, Saturday.  This is the Match I have a ticket for, and if the storms that are forecast for the evening don't happen when the Game happens (fingers crossed), I will be able to attend it.

#-1: Twins (Last Week: -1).  Went 3-3 this past Week, but no matter.  Just checked; only Arizona, The Bastard St. Louis Browns, The Bastard Washington Senators v.2.0, and Pittsburgh have worse records than the Twinks.

Let us review the transactions the Nine made at the Trade Deadline -- and the ones they didn't.  The big one is Jose Berrios, who was shipped off to Toronto.  I don't want to be a hypocrite because in last Week's Weekly Minnesota Sports Survey I verbally shook my head in disbelief at how he blew that lead vs. the White Sox on July 19.  He is barely an ace; I think he's old enough, and has thrown in enough Innings, for me to slot him in as a third- or possible second-Starting Pitcher on a championship team.  But he would be the ace for the Twins, and he is homegrown, which I believe is a prerequisite for this organization to break the bank to re-sign a player.  But they didn't.  Berrios was signed through next Year, and it appears as though his agent told the front office he's going to sow his wild oats, and that made him attractive trade bait.

However, while I slag this trade as yet another sign of "same ol' Twins," the return the ballclub got for Berrios was universally considered great.  Both Shortstop Austin Martin (nice name if he's into luxury vehicles) and Pitcher Simeon Woods-Richardson (has there ever been a good baseball player with a hyphenated last name?) immediately become the two best prospects in the Twins organization, and it's not as if Minnesota has a barren farm system.  And it doesn't appear as if fans have to wait a half-decade for them to come up to The Show.  They'll be here, if not in 2023 then maybe even next Year.  And, if all goes right, they'll be very productive for the main club ... and be traded before their second contract.

They finish up a four-Game set in Houston, then come home to host the ChiSox as part of their final big homestand.

#-2: Timberwolves (Re-Entry!).  Being so capped with two max players meant the Woofie Dogs have little-to-no wiggle room in which to make trades, sign Free Agents, and improve the roster.  That's why I am relatively unperturbed that the squad completely sat out last Week's Draft.  Still, I'm disappointed that they sent away Ricky Rubio to Cleveland.  As much of a liability he is on Offense, he was a veteran presence for a young team that still needs leadership and direction.  Moreover, Rubio loved it back in Minnesota, and by all accounts, you can count on both hands the number of NBA-caliber players who love it in Minnesota.

This largely looks like a move for cap relief, although the player the Timberwolves got back, Taurean Prince, is a stretch 4 that this team has needed for a long time.  But they now have enough money to go out and spend on a Power Forward better than Prince and can help on Defense.  Who could that be?  There are a slew of guys prognosticators have tossed out as possibilities, so I don't know where they'll turn.  But it still seems as though the person coming in won't be a needle-mover.  No, Karl-Anthony Towns will have stay off the Injured List, D'Angelo Russell needs to D up more (and stay off the Injured List), and the role players have to, well, grow up.

#-3: Wild (Re-Entry!).  The more I think about it, the more I think Bill Guerin made a huge mistake in buying out both Zach Parise and Ryan Suter.  Both of them may not be there, but their contracts are, especially for the next four seasons.  You might as well keep them around to hope they can still produce; right now, they're millstones that will prevent the big club from getting any better.

Meanwhile, and don't look now, but the Defenseman corps, once the bedrock of this franchise, suddenly seems to be soft.  Suter, still a good second pairing on his best days, is cavorting with The Bastard North Stars, and Carson Soucy was plucked by the Seattle Kraken in the Expansion Draft.  And I'm sorry, but the Free Agents the team signed a couple weeks ago -- Alex Goligoski (One Of Us), Frederick Gaudreau, Jon Lizotte, Dominic Turgeon -- are far from difference makers either at the pivot or on the blueline.  I'm making a prediction: The Minnesota Mild will have one of the worst Defenses in the NHL next Year.  Book it.

Meanwhile, the wrangling over signing Kapril Kaprizov and Kevin Fiala are going nowhere, and talk of trading for Jack Eichel has cooled significantly.  All this in an offseason before a one-Year window in which the squad may have enough salary cap room to go all-in on a Stanley Cup before the dead money from Parise's and Suter's contracts really begin to bite.  Great.

#-4: Vikings (Re-Entry!).  These guys had bad news comparably as bad as the Wolves and Wild.  But seeing that Training Camp has just started, being able to fear the worst of the Vikes' upcoming season as it's just starting invites a doom that is starker and more imminent than those other two teams.

It was a uniquely shitty couple days for the Purple.  They released First-Round Corner Jeff Gladney after details of his domestic violence arrest came out.  I haven't seen them myself because I don't want to get a sick stomach, but apparently they have to be so bad that even a football team won't put up with it.  And a reconfigured Cornerback group undergoes even more entropy.

But then the unforced error that is the Quarterback Quarantine really embarrassed this organization.  I don't know if I have all my facts straight, but it seems as though rookie QB Kellen Mond, who definitely did not get vaccinated, got COVID-19.  He, starting QB Kirk Cousins, and fellow QB Nate Stanley all had to be separated from the other players, the latter two under protocols whereby they get tested more frequently.  I don't know about Stanley, but Cousins came back yesterday/Thursday.

Give him credit for at least answering questions, but Cousins was pretty deflective when it came to queries over his vaccination status.  When asked point blank if he got the shot, he basically said that's a personal matter, so that means he didn't.  He went on to show that he is doing what he is supposed to do to keep safe from the coronavirus (according to the rules set by the NFL) and, at the very least, acting as if he believes that the virus is a big deal and a bad thing.  At the same time, he was tap-dancing like a motherfucker when it comes to getting the vaccine, something that could solve a lot of problems for the Vikings -- to ease restrictions for his team, if not necessarily to stay healthy, even though it does.

Contrast that vacillation with Head Coach Mike Zimmer.  I gotta tell you that I had no idea at all that Zim would be so pro-vaccine.  I don't know where it comes from -- whether he is trying to tell his players that getting shots clears away a lot of unnecessary obstacles or if he is personally invested in the benefits vaccines provide -- but I have to say that I like this (trigger word) "wokeness" from him.  Note that in his press conferences he isn't just saying that vaccines is good to ease NFL virus policy; he actually believes vaccines work, and moreover, he actually commented on some of the anti-vax disinformation that's on the Internet.  He said, "Woof" -- and "Woof" is right.

Zimmer's forthrightness (one of his most appealing qualities) is clashing with his starting Quarterback's anti-vaccine obfuscation.  On top of all that, Zimmer is scared as hell that Cousins will actually get infected, and that it will come during the regular season, or at the end of the regular season as they're fighting for a playoff spot.  He sees the statistics of transmission of COVID spiking everywhere.  I'm sure he believes that the vast majority of people getting sick, or worse, is almost universally affecting the unvaccinated.  And the linchpin of his team, the most important player on the Vikings, is one of Those People.  He can see disaster coming, and because of the players' union, there isn't a damn thing he can do about it.

Well, actually, he did do something about it: Give Jake Browning first-team reps.  I don't know know why and/or how Browning got to train while the others had to sit out, although I assume Browning has received the jab.  But I have the feeling that Zimmer would not mind starting the season with Browning under Center -- and beyond.

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