The Drunk Stranger

Being a Buddhist, I have nothing to do for Christmas, especially since my parents are in Vegas.  So what do I do?  Go out to the only stripclub open Christmas Eve.

Except that it wasn't.  What?  They advertised it.  So I didn't know what to do.  I actually had a couple moments where I thought about going to this nightclub instead of this stripclub, but after I saw the titty bar was closed and that the nightclub had a lot of people there -- and speculated that going into the place past midnight probably meant a $20 cover -- I decided against it.

But I didn't know where to go.  I went from downtown to Nordeast to see if this other titty bar was open (it wasn't), back to downtown to reconsider going into this nightclub, then finally back to Nordeast.  The first bar I saw for sure open was the one I decided to hit.

So I go in to this place, one I've heard about, and I sit and have a beer, with the intention of taking the bar in and people-watching.  But soon after I find an open stool at the bar, this fat woman sits at the stool next to me.  She said she was somewhere down the bar, but wanted to avoid this inebriated person from talking to her.

Turns out the inebriated person to avoid at this bar was her.

I don't know if I gave off the sense that I was open to talking to strangers tonight.  I wasn't.  This is Christmas Eve and I walked into the place alone.  That doesn't scream, "Hey, I want to make some friends tonight!"  Maybe I should've worn a hoodie and scowled more.

But after I told her the seat next to me was open and I -- dangit! -- looked at her and half-smiled, she started talking.  What are you doing here leads to I'm a recovering Catholic to I so admire Asians to I'm sorry you're out of work.  The way she not only spun her stool towards me but leaned into me ... she was talking so loudly into my ear she was touching me with her breath.  It was a noisy bar, sure -- I didn't want her talking to me, so who cares?

But even in her drunken state she was being not hostile, so I had to be nice.  She even gave me her number after she told me I should go back to the unemployment office and ask for education money, which was nice though I think it's futile.  Best of all, I left after about half an hour, and she let me go without telling me to stay or asking me for my number.  She didn't want to fuck me!  I am relieved.

Oh.  Merry Christmas, everyone.