Expenses Without Receipt

OK, starting from Friday, May 4:

• The first of two big parties for the week.  This was at ******s's place, the one who sexted me her big ass.  I fucked her as much as I could, but two days after blowing my wad, I couldn't cum the conventional way, so I had to just jerk myself off onto her tits and vaginal area.  It still was good.  There were several other girls there, but I only got a quick lapper from ****a, who understood it wasn't her time to go into the bed with her, because the last time I was at ******s's party, I took ****a to the back.  There was another girl who I met, clothed, at My Favorite Stripclub (Non-Cover Division).  I remember promising on Facebook to get an LD from her, but I didn't know she was there.  Well, either that or I didn't know her stripper name, so I was surprised she was there, although on Messenger she did say she thought she was going to be working ******s's party.  I totally forgot that until I decided to leave.  I would have given more money, but the fucking cover was $20 and I had to tip the doorwoman, *a***, who is eight months pregnant and, I believe, drank a glass of wine while I was there.  Total: $165.
• Back to Wednesday the 2nd, which is about a week after my niece's birthday.  I feel really bad that I can't see her as often as I should, and I think that giving her fits is a way to remind her that, you know, she has an uncle who cares for her.  I asked my sister-in-law for advice and she said either a board game or a book.  I quickly decided on Corduroy, the classic book about the bear.  The evening after I gave my sister-in-law her daughter's gift, she texted me back video of my niece opening up the gift ... well, trying to.  I had it wrapped at the only mall I know that can wrap gifts.  And apparently the worker was so good at it that of the 3 1/2 minutes of the video, all but a minute of it was my niece and her mom trying to unwrap the gift.  But in the end, that smile and her saying my name melts my heart.  It's funny: She knows who I am, yet back on Christmas Eve, when I visited her, she wouldn't get near me.  Is she so spoiled that the only way to get into her good graces is to bribe her with gifts?  If so ... yeah, maybe I'll do it.  I got Corduroy at Barnes & Noble, so I have a receipt.  But I don't have a receipt for the gift-wrapping, so I'll record it here: $4.50.
• I bought this on this date, even though I am kind of late for my niece's birthday gift, because it was in the same city as my first party of the week.  I noted all my exploits here.  With cover: $195.
• Let's take it back to Sunday, April 29, where I started my day at Caffetto, where I thought I would be there for a while, then realized I shouldn't.  Hot chocolate plus tip equals: $3.75.
• I remembered that the Big Ten Women's Tennis Tournament Final was being held at the Baseline Tennis Center at the U.  It was a way to burn a couple hours, but that meant that the other things I wanted to do, namely get a haircut and go to the library to make some copies, I had to find the time for.  So I made a reservation at Great Clips for a haircut, which was being sold for nine bucks from Thursday till Monday, and jetted to the Quarry.  And just in time, too; the woman who buzzed my hair said that there would be a rush of people coming in from church.  I was there a half-hour, max, thank goodness.  Cost with tip: $1211.99.
• So this was the first tennis event I ever went to.  Going in was free; the U. just opened up the gates and there I was, at eight tennis courts on a plot of land that, a quarter-century ago, was a parking lot.  I really had no idea what to expect.  All I knew was this was the title match between Northwestern and Michigan.  In the end, the 2-seed Wolverines upset the top-seeded Wildcats by winning the final two singles matches to finish.  I was right in front of the Wolverines player after she put away Championship Point; if I were a photographer, I would have had the perfect vantage point of her teammates rushing from background to foreground to mob #2 player.  I'm glad I went.  I just wish I put on some sunscreen and/or realized that I would be there for 3 1/2 hours, because I got a sunburn on the left side of my face, head and neck.  This EWR is for the program I bought: $5.
• Jetted to the library after the tennis matches.  I don't think I printed anything out, but I was pressing as shit just before the library closed because there was a line of people using the only two copy machines in the library, and one of them wasn't working, or so I thought.  At a quarter or ten to 5, I got the two copies of forms related to filling out this claim form for (potentially) applying for compensation money as part of a stock settlement regarding Facebook.  Total of: 20 cents.
• Saturday the 28th ... I went to the Twins game.  I got to start either thinking about snappy comebacks against asshole scalpers or avoid them altogether.  No goddamn way he was able to sell that ticket for what he wanted for it, bojanglin' slapdick.  But his loss was the organization's gain.  Sitting in the Center Field bleachers made me realize how hot the sun is even in late April.  On my way in I was given two free samples of yogurt.  I was told I could take them into the ballpark.  And then I decided I wanted a hot dog and a souvenir-sized Coke, because I thought I was too skinny.  So the total cost for the ticket, the hot dog and the big Pepsi came out to ... a very reasonable: $30.
• After the game I went up the street to my alma mater's spot for watching football games.  Wanted to pop in there to keep up relations, and to have a place to go before going to the United match.  Just a bottle of Bud Light, since it was Happy Hour.  Plus tip: $3.75.
• At the MNUFC game I had my usual: A hot dog and a Redd's.  Total: $15.25.
• After the win (and again I was surprised I went to two games on this day and saw the home team win both; that, seriously, never fucking happens) I went to Glam Doll to celebrate.  Got a free donut this time around.  With tip: $9.25.
• Reeling back to Wednesday, April 25, where I went to the library to print some stuff out for Mother.  Total: 20 cents.
• On Sunday the 22nd I ate at McDonald's for the first time in many a moon.  Don't remember which Mickey D's or why, but I took advantage of their value menu.  I like trying new, more expensive items, but eating a cheeseburger, small fries and a small Coke is more then enough of a lunch for me these days.  Lunch set me back: $3.97.
• I then went to the library to type out some letters for Mother, I think.  But three?  How come?  Probably because when I printed out my first letter I forgot to put something in, and then I remembered I had to put something in a second time.  Dammit.  Total of: 30 cents.

It's been only a dozen days, but I thought I would have a hell of a lot more EWRs to note.  I don't.  Phew!  Good through May 4.